I didn't feel like staying in school for rest of the day, so when I left the cafeteria I went straight outside.

Sun was shining, but it really didn't warm me anymore. Maybe I should go back to our house? I couldn't go to the mall because it was my school's every gang's hangout. As soon as the school would end, they would be there. And I would possibly get beaten. Since I haven't been beaten for a while, I except that next time will be soon. They do it usually when they get bored.

Last time had been bad. After waking up in the trench I had been barely able to drag myself home. I had been so scared and confused that I hadn't even remembered to use my telephone. Roxas had found me crumpling from our front door, and he had done the best he could with my wounds. I never consent to use hospital because if I did, my parents would find out about it and maybe uncover the truth about my sexuality.

"They'll throw me out" I always said when Roxas wanted to call to the health centre, "Then I have to live in streets and I'll get beaten twice as much as now"

We always cried together. Roxas cried because he felt bad for watching me suffering. I cried, partly because I was hurt and partly because I knew I was complicating Roxas to enjoy his life.

I don't want to stop him having a good time. And maybe I should try too. Maybe I should go to mall. I checked the time. It was still couple of hours before school would end. If I'd go there…

But then again… many of my bullies skipped their schooldays for no reason. They could be there anyway, right now. I didn't skip often. In fact, this was my first time I skipped for nothing; usually I went to the school even after I had been beaten. That was because I wanted to get good diploma and go to the college somewhere far away as soon as possible. Somewhere where no one knew me and where would be friendlier attitude at gays. That's what I wanted.

Until now, at least…

But now there were things that made it different. There was him.

To be honest, right now I couldn't care less about marks and school and college and stuff like that. I wanted to talk to Riku. Talk him, properly, like yesterday. I wanted to find him and ask why he was so rude to me; I really, really wanted to see him alone…

Wait!

Alone. That was it! Riku was so rude to me because there were all of his fans around him. Yes, yes! Riku couldn't let anyone to see how he, the hero, was kind to the guy like me…

Suddenly my mind, which had already lightened up, went dark again. What our friendship would be like, if he always had to act like I was dirt when there was other people around?

Why was I talking about friendship anyway? Like Riku would ever want to be friends with me…

X

X

So I went back to our house – I just can't call it home.

When I opened the front door I heard the sound of boiling butter coming from kitchen. My father had apparently woken up and was now preparing himself to the next night shift. He always cooked himself some really greasy foods like sausages and bacon, or ordered fast food meals. Our house's bins are always full of hamburger's wrapping papers and empty pizza boxes. My father has a big shaking stomach. I think it's disgusting. I never eat very much.

Riku is very thin, even though he seems to go to the McDonald's with his friends nearly every day. He must train himself well…

"Who's there?" My father shouted when he heard me closing the door.

I didn't answer but I walked to the kitchen's door so he could see me. It had been long time I had seen him, anyway.

"What are you doing home this early?" He asked unfriendly, turning the fried egg on the pan.

This is not my home, I wanted to say. "I didn't feel well. So I came here"

"Sissy" My father snorted and places the egg to the plate. There was already three on it, "Real men do not spend their days idling at home"

"You said it" I muttered, turning away from the door.

"What was that?!"

"I'm going to my room doing my homework"

Of course I didn't do my homework. Instead I took one of my notebooks and tore an empty page from it.

Hey Riku, I wrote with my messy handwriting, I like you very much.

No, that wasn't a very good start. Probably Riku got those kind of messages from girls every day. I wanted to prove that I was different.

Riku, I wrote again; just because I liked to write his name. Even his name was beautiful.

Riku, I know that you or your friends maybe think that I'm worthless and stupid just because I like boys instead of girls. But I really want to be friends with you. Would you like to come to my house for a visit sometimes?

Sora

I red it over and over and the words sounded more and more ridiculous each time. I would definitely never give this to Riku.

I put the paper away and sighed. Maybe I should go and play basketball, since that was the only thing I liked to do.

Beside Riku, a little voice said in my head. Yeah, right, but I can't do Riku, so it doesn't matter.

I knew that there was a little basketball field near Roxas' school. Some of my school's team's players surely trained there in their free time. But it was still noon, and there was plenty of time left. Maybe I could go… just for a little while. It was so much better field than the one behind our house. I had always wanted to play there. Not as much as in the real team, of course. But still, training in the proper field could be fine for my skills…

I grabbed my telephone and choose a number. Roxas should have a break right now…

"Hey, bro" Roxas' cheerful voice answered, "Aren't you supposed to be at school?"

I knew that he was only joking but I still said: "Yes. I'm skipping"

"Oh" Roxas' voice got a little depressed, "Dare I ask why?"

"Not anything special" I lied, even though every cell in my body was screaming for Riku's name, "Where are you now?"

"Heading back to the school. We were at the kiosk. Hey guys, it's Sora, say hello"

"Hello, Sora" I heard Axel's voice laughing. Hearing a friendly greeting cheered me up a little immediately.

"Hello there, my partner in gayness" Demyx's voice said, excited as usual. I laughed; nothing had made me laugh for a long time.

"So, what are you calling for?" Roxas asked, a bit more seriously this time, "Are you okay?"

I knew what he meant, "Yes, I'm fine. Look, I just wondered, when there's that basketball field quite near of your school…"

"Yes, we're just passing it right now"

"Good. Is there anybody playing?"

"In that field? No, it's empty. Why?"

"Not much. I'm just going to go there. To practise"

"Okay" Roxas said slowly. He sounded a bit worried, and I understood him.

"Hey, little brother" I said warmly, "I can't stay inside this house forever"

"Yeah. I understand. Well, have a good time. And be careful"

"Yeah, bye"

"Bye"

X

X

I got to the field in no time and stepped inside from the iron gate carefully. The place was quite spacious, green field of very short fake grass. There was a basket in each end and the field was entirely enclosure.

I would be nearly impossible to escape, if someone would come and try to hurt me. But it didn't matter; I never ran away. Besides, I could not live my life in fear all the time. I had to take what world offered to me.

So I took off my overcoat and warmed up with a ball for a moment. I ran around the field, reworking my dribble. I couldn't usually practise that in our little back yard field, so I didn't want to let it grow weaker.

There was no one in view and I started to enjoy myself. It was wonderful to train all alone, with no one bothering me. I threw the ball in the basket for some time, and after I had scored 20 in a row I tried to dunk. That had always been my weak point. It was the only part of the game I really felt to be too short for. And I wasn't so good at jumping high as Roxas was. But I didn't want to dunk like Roxas.

If I could dunk like Riku… Riku…

Riku was perfect at dunking. He was a perfect player. He was perfect…

And suddenly I almost had a heart-attack when I heard a voice behind me:

"It seems that you really can play"

X

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Third chapter… I really loved your comments last time, thank you all!

And I still love if you want to comment more!