Ch.3 – No Longer Lost -Part 1

Author's Note: I'd like to take a moment and apologize for not updating this story for a while. I've had serious writer's block along with other issues. Chapter 3 is in two parts so you can better understand certain situations from both views of Christian and Roxanne. Hope you keep reading this story as it progresses and enjoying whatever you like. :)

Song: Never Be Another by Delilah

Roxanne slowly walked out of her job interview with disappointment tensed in her petite curvy body, all because she was blind which was totally bogus as she wasn't that much of an uncoordinated person as she didn't want to be dependant on a cane with the typical blind fashion, a dog as she honestly didn't know if she had the finaces to take care of an animal or another human being for their help. She didn't want to seem like a cold-hearted bitch and put a lawsuit on the company for the discrimination, even though she was pratically skin and bones with barely any money to save for emergencies.

It had been a week since she got out of the hospital from unknown reasons that caused her to be suddenly blind from the car crash. How was she going to cope going back to high school and not being able to see things, not being able to see the rare smiles that she managed to get from Christian when it was just the two of them? Roxanne gripped her pillow in her small pale hands as she – tried- and failed to hide the sobbing that escaped and shook her to the core. She hunched over, starting to gasp, as everything negative felt magnified suddenly: every insecurity about her naturally thin and currently boyish figure of too-small chest and hips, not being able to see what Christian would look like ten years from now or at all, not being able to see the joy and love and adoration on the man's face of whomever she'd marry. The list seemed suddenly way too long to keep track of.

Roxanne didn't know a prescence was there as she was gasping, stuck somewhere between reality and memory, until the masculine arm snaked around her shoulders and she was crying into the formal shirt that had spicy scent that was Christian, just like the memory of him secretly comforting her when she was in despair that suddenly snaked back to her present concious. She felt her eyes widen as Christian soothed her, it felt natural and protective that had the other guys at a distance.

Roxanne felt her cheeks heat up as she'd never been that close to the elder teen before with his side pressed against hers, did she hear him breathe in the scent of her hair and mutter something under his breath? If she thought about it, it sounded like a promise of some kind. Did he feel obligated to stand up for her or was it something else? His voice sent shivers down her spine as he whispered to her as she fell asleep in his arms and the rest seemed like a bunch of garble to her, "If anything, Roxanne, I'll keep you safe somehow..."

"If anything, Roxanne, I'll keep you safe somehow. No matter the cost of myself," she heard Christian murmur to her as she suddenly felt transported from her current seat to a leather upholstery of a kind.

Roxanne groaned as she felt way too warm with a weight on her when she gently brushed her fingers through Christian's hair to his bare shoulder as she smiled and another long forgotten memory made itself present along with a good morning present.

Roxanne slowly opened her eyes and listened to birds chirping near the window, it was morning and Christian was laying on top of her with his head on her chest and his arms around her like a vine against a brick wall, not that it was a bad thing. It was certainly different by all standards for her, though. It was more than enough to make her face flame a fire engine red as she felt something prodding against her hip and she knew for a fact that it wasn't a wad of cash Christian had in his pocket.

Roxanne was suddenly brought back from the memory when she heard a soft groan from her lover, she stayed silent to gauge if he was mad and he seemed not to be. "Morning there, smiling sunshine," she heard him rumble in a throaty voice. She smiled and teased,"Is that a wood pecker I feel or are you just happy to see me?" She let out a giggle as the previous night's play continued through the early morning.

Roxanne felt her fingers glide over the shadow of stubble on Christian's face as she slowly lowered his head to meet him for a first kiss: a shy kiss of two teenagers that were somewhat uncertain of themselves and their emotions. She was surprised to feel him kiss her back with a moment's hesitation. Roxanne gasped as she felt him shift a bit to be on top of her better, kissing her neck as he grinded his jeans clad hips against her. She arched her back and failed to stifle a whimper as he lightly nipped her throat and thrusted against her hips fast, his hands pinning her wrists above her head. She felt herself wet with sweat and dizzy with Christian's play without taking her modest sleeping top and shorts set off. He certainly seemed eager to keep doing this until...something happened. Alarm suddenly raced through her veins as she felt something wrong with this situation, even as her body arched up to his. "Stop, please stop," she cried out with unseeing eyes that held tense curiosity as she cupped his face in her small hands. "Why are you doing this, what's come over you when you barely acknowledge me at school and home," she timidly asked and all she heard from him was harsh breathing and stomping feet as he reached her bedroom door and slammed it closed with enough force to make her jump.

Roxanne blinked as she suddenly felt tears in her eyes and failed to hide them from Christian, "Roxy, are you hurt," he panickly questioned as she gasped and covered her face with something that sounded like "Not physically". She was shaking as she wanted to strangle her some maneating cougar slut and then take the body from Seattle to feed the remains to the gators of New Orleans, but she wasn't heartless. She only hated what the woman had done to Christian, she didn't know if his parents knew, but she knew that she didn't want to upset him with part of the past as he might not remember and think she was making it up. She was surprised that he didn't stomp off like he did when he was seventeen and with her being sixteen, but he held her until the crying stopped.

Roxanne had somehow gotten to Elena Lincoln's expansive mansion without much trouble, only to feel the door open ajar. She timidly stepped past the landing as she called out in question. Roxanne slowly made her way to the room where the not-so-strange noise was coming from and it wasn't from the television set. It really sounded like the older woman was having sex that apparently, knew what he was doing. Roxanne blinked as she continued to listen and heard the whistle of a whip or something of the sort, hit against flesh, and louder moaning from Elena as she groaned Christian's name out. It shocked Roxanne to the core of her soul that he was not only going for sex with a woman that was a bit older than him, but it was kinky sex with Elena Lincoln and it broke her heart as she realized that he would never go to this woman so willingly!

Roxanne felt herself jolt like she was electrocuted from the inside out with the nightmare memory of the cougar slut with the loving Christian Grey whom had put up so many barriers without realizing. She let her hand slide over the bed with disappointment that Christian's side was empty and cold, like her heart. Curling up on her side with the sheets draped over her hips, she broke down and cried hard. She had no idea what the connection was between Christian, Elena Lincoln and this Ana person, but it broke her down all the more for whatever Christian had suffered in his life. Roxanne sobbed for however long and was too deep in her sadness to move or care about her nudity from all the sex she had with Christian, but she had no idea how things were going to be when he saw her again.

Author's Note: I'm sorry for how I ended this part of the chapter, but things will progress thoroughly. Message me with your thoughts of what part 2 might hold or please leave a review.