Title: Gone

Title: Gone

Author: Baliansword

Rating: PG-13

Warnings: Angst. Likely sexual content, violence, language to come later.

Chapter: 3 of unknown, "Perception"

Summary: Excerpt –there was no love between them, not now, not so far away from where they had first set eyes upon one another. The love was gone, and all around them knew it, but neither was willing to mention it. The vacancy instead remained between them.

A/N: Back to my roots, let me know what you think.

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Light shifted into the room, filling the open space and lighting up the darkened walls, stained with colors made from herbs and berries. The drapes moved slowly in the breeze, but it still seemed dreadfully hot. It was hard to comprehend how the climate changed so quickly in these lands, from rains one day to scorching dirt the next. Alexander ran a hand over his head and drank deeply from the goblet of water before he turned to the messenger boy. He'd been drinking for at least a good minute, and clearly was thankful for the refreshment. His cheeks had lost their redness from the heat and his heaving for air had subsided, but still, he drank until the king turned to face him. Placing his cup down, he bowed his head once again, and then waited for his orders.

"Tell me," Alexander began, resting against the back of a large chair. "How is progress on this new granary? Does Hephaestion fare well?"

"Sir, the granary is on schedule, as are the barracks and other temporary stalls for the horses, my lord. But, but I fear that Hephaestion did not travel with us, not to my knowledge. Titus leads us, no other, not that I know."

"Hephaestion is not with you," Alexander flared, almost reaching out and taking his anger out of the youth. He knew better though, and instead ran a hand through his hair, tempted to pull it out. He removed his hand, running it over his mouth with a curse, and then looked back to the boy.

"Did he ride out with Titus," the king asked quickly.

"No," the boy negated, shaking his head slightly. For a moment he considered whether or not it would benefit him to tell Alexander that he had indeed seen Hephaestion leaving on the same day as they had. However, Hephaestion had most definitely gone in the opposite direction. He'd likely spoken to Titus about the event, for Titus had told the men to act as if they'd seen nothing. While many held no loyalty to Titus, they certainly held respect for Hephaestion, and in honor would say nothing. Yet, he knew that this was his king, who could swiftly and rightly kill him if he said not. It was tough, deciding which many to betray.

"Did you see him on your departure?"

"Yes," the youth admitted. Now that the king had asked there was no way that he was willing to risk his life. Hephaestion, he knew, was in no danger with Alexander. It was out of concern that the king was raging now. He cared deeply for this general, and who could blame him? Not only was Hephaestion the ideal specimen of a man, but he was also loyal. Loyalty, all knew, was hard to find.

"I saw him," the boy went on, "as we were preparing to leave with Titus. The general prepared his horse, and after doing so, he did ride out of the gates with us. Conversationally he spoke to Titus, but then he veered away, without explanation. I thought perhaps he had scouted on, but when he did not appear, I asked Titus if a search should be sent. Titus assured me no, that Hephaestion had other business on your demand."

"Did he?"

"On my life."

"No," Alexander waved him off, "I wasn't speaking to you. Thank you, messenger. Please, take your rest in the palace tonight. Fill your stomach before leaving on the morrow."

The boy left, much to Alexander's pleasure. It gave him a moment to knock his goblet off of the table before cursing loudly and slamming a hand down on the table. Tossing his head against the table, sighing heavily, he then waited until he heard another knock upon the door. Spinning, he bade the disruptor enter, but was pleased enough when he saw Nearchus enter. Nearchus came forward and embraced him quickly before stepping away, smiling slightly, and he surely took the cup of wine that Alexander offered. Drinking deeply, allowing the extra drops to trickle down his chin, he kept the king in suspense. After a moment, the cup was set down, and Nearchus took a seat before the king.

"It is good you are returned," Alexander agreed, sitting, all the while trying to push thoughts of Hephaestion from his mind. He wanted so badly to hate him, but knew deep down that he could not. It would be impossibly hard to do so. Nearchus, if he noted the king's distraction, did not let on. Instead, he continued with his cup, but took breaks to speak while filling his gut with the wine he was long deprived of.

"I spoke to the Oracle, and once more she said that Alexander would have many victories. However, there was a warning," the general admitted. Alexander sat forward, and eyebrow raised in interest. Nearchus took another swig, refilling his glass, and then sighed. "I am afraid I can only remember the words, not whom it was she referred to."

"Go on," Alexander urged.

"She answered to your victories first. However, she then said 'The external soul of the king will be taken by the night, the gold faded to black, and the eyes of life gone'. What this means I cannot be sure, but she said that soon enough you would understand. And to correct it, she said to tell you, 'Keep the light of life lit, the flame burning within the heart, and night shall not set'. It makes no sense to me, my king, but perhaps you'll appreciate it soon enough."

"Interesting," Alexander pondered, leaning back and thinking. Once more he sighed, running his hand through his hair and then over his eyes. "I will have to think on it later. For now I have other things on my mind."

"Hephaestion? That is, if I might ask."

"Gone," he replied. "When he rode out I had taken it to mean he was going with Titus, and he'd mentioned it as well. However, the messenger just said that he had never reached the scout's camp with Titus and his men. He parted from them. It worries me, not knowing where he is. I wonder, sometimes, if it will always be like this between us. We are worlds apart, though at times we stand side by side."

Again there was a knock at the door, which caused Alexander to curse before leaping up. He approached the door and then pulled it open, not giving Cassander the opportunity to enter by himself. Cassander did not seem to mind. Instead, he entered and took Alexander's seat, boldly tossing his legs onto the desk. He reached out, taking a peach, and bit into the sweet nectarine, but soon decided that it did not suit his mood, and he set it down. Wiping his mouth with the back of his hand he noted the glare that Alexander shot at him. Snorting, Cassander rolled his eyes.

"Soothe your troubles," he mocked. "Hephaestion is not far from here. He left the path, true enough, but he appears to be spending a night alone, by himself. There is no other with him. I waited for a good two hours before I decided that watching him mill around was a waste of m time, which, I might remind you, is quite valuable."

"Where is he," Alexander asked.

"A ten minute's walk up the main road, turn at a fallen stump and continue east into the forests. Once you reach the stream, take a left, and follow your way to his encampment. Truly, he does not run from you. There is no other in his life. He merely seems to want seclusion."

"From me?"

"How would I know," Cassander chuckled. "You know, you don't walk up to the person you are spying on and ask him what he is doing. It arouses suspicion. Besides, Alexander, he will be back when Titus and his men begin to return."

Alexander nodded, saying nothing, and then took another drink from his cup. He could only hope that Cassander was right, and no other was joining Hephaestion on this night.

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The night was creeping over him as he lay in the murky waters of the stream. Closing his eyes, he once more sunk beneath the water. As he lifted himself out of the water, crawling over the bank, he lay his back against a flattened stone. It was cool, the air crisp, but it felt better than the weight of his clothes upon his chest. Inhaling deeply, he closed his eyes and remained as the wind wafted over him. Then, after a long pause, he felt a cough arising in his throat. Lurching forward he coughed heavily, until a drop of blood speckled the ground. Reaching up, he wiped the blood away, and then pulled his chiton over his chest. Over this he then wrapped himself with a Persian robe before entering his tent. Lying down on the darkened grass, no need for blankets here, he stared upward until his eyes slowly closed. However, when they opened, he stared into the eyes of another.

A/N: Welcome back Jess! Hope your trip was fun. And to all of my reviewers, thank you. Let me know what you think of this chapter. See you in the next!