Chapter 3: Jazmin's Tale
Jazmin gazed at the man in front of her. His dark, Italian good looks were marred by the hardness of his eyes and the edge of cruelty around his mouth. How had she not seen that cruel streak? She asked herself that question for the thousandth time. So many images flooded her mind. She saw herself as a young girl around five or six years old in pigtails trailing after Jason and Joseph. She saw that same girl falling and scrapping her knee when she couldn't keep up with them. Both boys instantly turned at her cries and rushed to her aid.
When she was younger, Joseph had been so kind and sweet, more like Jason. She remembered once them both fighting off a twelve-year-old bully who had been tormenting her when they were just ten. The two of them always made her feel safe and protected. She had felt cherished. Always. Then Jazmin's mind flashed to much uglier scenes. The fighting, the betrayal, the yelling, the screams, and then the blood. She unconsciously closed her eyes at the images.
Duncan could sense her distress. "Are you okay, Jaz?" He put his arm comfortingly around her. For a moment, she allowed herself to lean into him for strength. Then she willed away her weakness and straightened her back. She knew how merciless Joseph could be if he sensed a weakness.
He didn't waste any time but stepped in closer. "I see you found yourself a new stud to fill your bed. A gringo. How common of you, Jazzie! No wonder your dear brother was unusually chatty with me when I came in. He hoped to keep me occupied, so I would be denied the pleasure of your man's acquaintance. Aren't you going to introduce us?" Joseph asked casually.
Jazmin grimaced when Joseph referred to Duncan as a gringo. His use of the Spanish insult for a white man was used purposely. He wanted to taunt her with the reminder of his association with the Latin Kings, one of Chicago's most notorious Latino gangs. Joseph had a small amount of Hispanic blood in him from his mother's side of the family. When they were fifteen, he had befriended a member by helping him out of a tight spot. He had even gotten her brother to spend some time around their ranks. It had only been a combination of her pleading and threats to go to their dads that had forced both boys to sever ties. However, Joseph had only pretended to cut ties. He liked too much the heady danger and allure of the forbidden. He also liked having something his best friend, Jason, did not.
Jazmin refused to rise to his bait. She politely said, "Joseph Romano, this is my boyfriend from Neptune, Duncan Kane. Duncan, this is Joseph, the son of my dad's business partner." She knew dismissing him as nothing more would infuriate him. She suppressed a smile when she saw the anger darken his eyes. Then she realized her mistake in baiting him when he smiled coldly and stepped in closer. He grabbed her hand and brought it slowly to his lips. He kissed it gallantly and mocked, "Is that any way to introduce your first love? After all, I alone had the pleasure of being the first man to touch you intimately, to hear you sob out my name in ecstasy."
Jazmin snatched her hand away from him in disgust. "Show no weakness," she reminded herself. She refused to let him see that he was getting to her. Instead, she went on the offense. "Are you sure about that Joseph? How do you know I hadn't been faking it? After all, we learned at an early age from both our parents to become masters at pretense and deception." She waited a beat until doubts could enter his mind. Then she said, "I hear these days you spend a lot of money paying someone to pleasure you. What's the matter, Joseph? Did you run out of whores willing to lay down with you for free? Or maybe your reputation of slapping around your women has finally made the rounds!" Jazmin tempered her voice with contemptuous disdain, knowing where to hit him to inflict the most pain. They knew one another too well.
Joseph surprised her by smiling. "Ah, such passion still for me! Careful, Jazzie! You wouldn't want your new boy toy to realize the affect I still have on you." He raised his hand to caress her face that had become flushed with anger. "You're all hot and bothered!"
Finally, Duncan had had enough. He stepped forward and pushed Jazmin behind him. "Okay, that's enough. You're a stud. We get it. Now go away!" Duncan said dismissively to him.
Jason had been carefully watching the scene unfold. He could see that things were about to get out of hand. His dad would be most displeased if anything occurred that would embarrass the family. He stepped closer so that he could intervene.
Joseph warned Duncan, "Careful, Kane. She may take you to her bed, but she'll never let you in her heart. A woman never gets over the father of her child!"
Jazmin sucked in a sharp breath at his words. Duncan couldn't help but look at her in shock. Joseph smiled in satisfaction.
"That's enough, Joseph!" Jason demanded. "Leave now before I make you!" Joseph locked eyes with Jason for a brief moment. However, he knew he couldn't beat Jason. History had taught him that. He also knew how angry his father would be if he took things any further. Besides, he'd won this round. He saw the shock on Kane's face and upset on Jazzie. "What a great way to start a New Year!" he thought. He left whistling his favorite tune.
"Are you okay, Sis?" Jason asked in concern. "Don't let that snake upset you or ruin your time with Duncan." He said to Duncan, "Duncan, Joseph is like a snake. He strikes and slinks off. He's done much to hurt my sister and destroy our family. Don't let him win by disrupting your plans. Take my sister to dinner and talk. I'm sure there are things you two need to discuss."
He took his sister's hand and walked her a few feet away from Duncan to talk to her in private. "Oh God, Jason! I can't believe Joseph said that! What must Duncan be thinking? I was going to tell him the story tonight. Joseph is such an ass!" she cried.
Jason pulled her into a hug. As he held her, he whispered softly. "Don't let him take anymore from you, Sis. I'll take care of him. He's going to learn to stay away from you if it's the last thing I do."
Jazmin pulled back and looked at her brother. "Don't, Jay. Dad will get angry with you for stirring up things. I'll be back in Neptune in a week. My life there is so different from my life here that it's like a dream."
"A dream I'm not a part of," her twin reminded her sadly.
"I know. I hate that! I feel guilty for being happy away you, Jason. I do miss you terribly when I'm away. I hope you now that," she assured him.
"I do, Jaz. I feel the same way. We get busy with school and life. It doesn't mean we ever forget or stop caring. I worry about you being so far away from where I can't watch over you. If anything ever happens to you again, I'm not sure I could take it," he admitted.
"You're the strongest man I know, Jason. But nothing's going to happen to me. I've made some very loyal and protective friends. I wish you could meet Veronica. She's fearless and ferocious like a true Italian, but she's a tiny, blonde. She's a paradox. You'd love the puzzle of trying to figure her out."
Jason smiled. "I'm intrigued; I hope to meet her someday. But you're ignoring your man." He kissed his sister on the cheek and said goodbye to Duncan. He walked away thinking that he may just do something about the distance between him and his sister when classes resumed. He had an ace he could use with his dad that he knew would work.
"Did I hear you mention Veronica?" Duncan asked. He decided to not mention what Joseph said. He'd let Jazmin share at her own pace and discretion.
"Yes, I was telling Jason not to make waves with Joseph because I'd be back in Neptune in a week with my friends. I mentioned Veronica as one of them that I knew he'd like because she is fearless and protective."
"You have no idea!" Duncan exclaimed. "She can be hell on wheels that's for sure! I'll have to tell you some stories over dinner. Shall we go? I think I'm ready now for our alone time."
Jazmin smiled in relief at how willing Duncan was to put aside Joseph's remarks. He was such a kind man, but he deserved to know more about her.
As they headed to Duncan's car rental, he offered, "How about we eat at the restaurant in my hotel? It's a nice one. We can order room service and talk privately in my room. I think it would be good if we talked." Jazmin agreed, so they headed to The Four Seasons.
******The Four Seasons******
When they arrived to Duncan's room, Jazmin went over to the window so that she could admire the view. "It's such a beautiful view!" she remarked.
"I know!" he replied with a grin as he gave her a menu to look at. They ordered their food; Duncan ordered a bottle of champagne. Regardless of whatever history is revealed, he is determined that they still celebrate both the New Year and their time together.
"I know we've got a lot to talk about, but it's still New Year's Eve. After our talk, I want to toast in the New Year with you," he told her.
"That sounds nice," Jazmin replied with a smile. "I feel really awful about you having to witness that scene with Joseph, especially considering I hadn't even really told you anything about him before. I am really sorry."
"That's okay," he said judiciously. "I'm not mad. I'll admit it disappoints me a bit that you haven't felt like you could confide in me yet. But I figure it's not about not wanting to tell me, but it's about you probably not wanting to think about ugly memories. I know I don't."
Jazmin gave him a relieved and grateful look for his understanding. "That's it exactly! When I left here to go to Hearst, I really wanted to put all the ugly things behind me. I wanted to start fresh. Making friends with Veronica and meeting all of you was so great. Growing up here, it was always just me, Jason, and Joseph. I never really had close girlfriends. My family mostly keeps me from allowing anyone to get too close. My dad's a bit on the controlling side."
"Families can be complicated. I can understand what you mean. I have very few close friends that didn't survive high school at Neptune. We're kind of a closed group for the most part. It's hard to allow people in who can't always understand what you've been through or experienced. I get that. More than you know. The fact that Veronica befriended you so easily is probably because she sensed you were kindred spirits!" Duncan said, smiling.
"You think so? We've not really shared a lot of personal history. She told me she was best friends with your late sister who Logan's dad murdered. Her frankness surprised me, but she didn't go into details. And I didn't think it'd be right to ask," Jazmin said.
"The fact that she even brought it up to you at all tells me that she trusted you instinctively more than she does others. Trust doesn't come easy to her," Duncan revealed.
Their conversation was interrupted by a knock on the door. Duncan got up to let in their dinner. After tipping the bell hop, he removed the lids and brought the food over to the table. They ate in companionable silence for the most part. Both of them were trying to sort through what they wanted to share with the other. Duncan had decided that he'd make her feel better by sharing first some more details about his own life with her. Maybe then she would feel more comfortable revealing more of her own personal history.
"Jazmin, I think I want to share more details of my own history with Veronica with you before you start telling me yours. It might make things easier for you if that's okay," he offered.
"Sure. I'd love to learn more about you," she responded.
"Veronica probably assumes I've already told you more than I have. I know you know that we dated in high school, but it's a bit more complicated than that. We were sophomores when we first dated. And Logan was dating Lilly," he informed her.
He went on to describe Lilly and Logan's turbulent relationship and the sweetness of his first love with Veronica. Then he shared the ugly false revelation his mother let slip about Veronica possibly being his sister due to her mom's affair with his dad. He told Jazmin about how it freaked him out and how poorly he dealt with it. He confessed how badly he hurt Veronica. Then he got to the really ugly part about his sister's murder and the horrible aftermath: Sherriff Mar's investigation that shattered the group and ostracized Veronica.
When he began sharing how Logan led the charge in tormenting Veronica, he could see the disbelief on her face. She broke in, "Wallace mentioned to me that Logan and Veronica had a rocky start and how Logan had busted out her headlights once, but I didn't realize really how bad it really was for her. That's a lot to take in! Poor Veronica!"
"Well, unfortunately, I haven't gotten to the worst parts. I pretty much let it happen. Because I was so ashamed that I had been dating a girl I thought was my sister, I didn't explain to anyone but Lilly why I suddenly broke up with Veronica. Not even Logan knew why. He assumed that she must have done something awful. And when she sided with her dad when he was investigating my dad for Lilly's murder, Logan felt truly betrayed."
"Well, of course, Veronica sided with her father! That's her dad!" Jazmin declared. In her family, loyalty was everything. It was more important than anything—even love.
"Logan didn't have the relationship with his dad that she had. His dad was a monster, so in his book, friends always come before family," Duncan explained. "He took out all his anger over Lilly's death on Veronica. And when someone from the Sheriff's department leaked the video of Lilly's body the night she was killed, the anger intensified. Everyone blamed Sheriff Mars for the leak. Everyone followed Logan's lead, and my silence was interpreted as approval," he admitted shamefully.
Then he went on to tell her about Shelly's party and sleeping with Veronica. He also shared how Veronica woke up alone without her underwear on and no memory. Someone had slipped her the date rape drug. She knew she had been raped.
"You raped Veronica?" Jazmin asked in horror.
"No! No! Dick's younger brother, Cassidy did. Logan had slipped something into my drink, too, so I'm fuzzy on the details. Logan thought he'd help me have a good time; I was mostly depressed after Lilly died. Anyway, from what Ronnie was able to piece together, she and I were both under the influence of alcohol and drugs. Feelings came out when we were together in a room at Shelly's. One thing led to another, and it just happened. She had been a virgin. Afterwards, I was so horrified by the thought that I had taken my own sister's virginity that I fled and left her there asleep and alone. And in case you hadn't figured it out yet, she's not actually my sister! My mom was wrong. She got a DNA test and Keith Mars is her father," he explained.
"I don't even know what to think about that," Jazmin admitted, shaking her head.
"I know. It's pretty awful," Duncan replied. "Anyway, Dick was tormenting his brother Beaver—that's what everyone called Cassidy—about him losing his virginity that night. Dick saw Veronica passed out in the room and told Cassidy to have his way with her."
"What?" Jazmin exclaimed. Duncan's revelations were beginning to make her feel sick. Her respect and admiration for Veronica was increasing by the minute. "Dick encouraged his brother to rape an unconscious girl? And you all are still friends with him? Mac's dating this guy?"
"I know hearing it makes it seem really black and white. However, you'd have to have known Beaver to understand. He was a nice, harmless guy. Extremely smart. No one at all had any inkling of what he was truly capable of or the damage that had been done to him by an abusive baseball coach. Dick was just trying to humiliate him. He never dreamed Cassidy would actually touch Veronica. No one knew either until Cassidy told Veronica what he did right before he killed himself," Duncan said.
Jazmin didn't know what to think. All she knew for sure was that Veronica had an amazing capacity to forgive. "I cannot believe Veronica is friends with all of you or that she's so in love with Logan now. I know I could never be so forgiving if I had been in her place."
"Yes, she's an amazing woman. She has proven again and again that she doesn't give up easily on people she cares about and that there's no lengths she won't go through for her friends," Duncan replied.
Then he proceeded to share how she'd been willing to help Logan after his mom committed suicide. He also told how he had begun dating Meg his junior year in the spring semester, shortly before Veronica and Logan began seeing each other.
"I didn't handle it well," he admitted. "I cared about Meg. She was a great girl, but I never allowed myself to let Veronica go. Of course, I hated myself, too, for feeling that way because I hadn't yet known she was not my sister. Veronica finally told me that we weren't related the same day she uncovered the truth behind Lilly's murder. My relief in hearing the news combined with all that happened with Aaron and my parents immediately after his arrest, made it clear that Meg deserved more in a boyfriend. I broke up with her before school was out. I didn't discover she was pregnant until classes resumed back in September," he explained.
"What a mess!" Jazmin observed.
"It really was. Especially considering Veronica and Logan broke up halfway through the summer. Logan had gotten involved in a war with the local gang. Veronica got scared and broke up with him. Right before school started, she and I got back together," Duncan said.
"I can't imagine that went over well with Logan," Jazmin said.
"That'd be an understatement! Veronica isn't someone a guy just gets over. Logan and I didn't speak for at least a full semester except for the times he insulted me or Ronnie," Duncan told her.
"I imagine you came to blows at least once!" Jazmin remarked with a smile.
"Naturally!" Duncan responded with an answering smile. "I was never one for fighting in high school. But Logan really knows how to push a person's buttons. Eventually, though, we made peace. We had been friends too long to let Veronica come between us," Duncan said. "Mostly, we both had a lot of other things going on. The bus crash Dick's brother Cassidy caused happened at the beginning of the school year. Several students and the driver died. Meg was the sole survivor."
"I thought you said she died in the crash?" Jazmin asked.
"Well, actually she was in a coma for months. That's when I found out she was pregnant. Didn't I tell you that at least?" he inquired.
"Oh, that's right! I just had bus crash in my head," Jazmin explained.
"Well, if it hadn't been for the crash, she wouldn't have been in a coma and had the blood clot that killed her. I'm just so grateful she lived long enough to deliver Lilly. She also came out of the coma for a short time. Veronica and I got to speak with her and make peace before she died. She'd been really hurt that I started dating Veronica again. Of course, I did not know she was pregnant when Veronica and I got back together," he clarified. "I'd like to think I'd have done right by Meg if I had known."
"I'm sure you would have," Jazmin assured him. "That poor girl! It must have been awful for her to have been pregnant with your baby and you were with Veronica."
"Yea, well, it wasn't my finest hour—that's for sure. I probably shouldn't have dated Meg to begin with. I never stopped loving Veronica, and I knew that when I started dating Meg," he admitted.
"Do you still have feelings for Veronica?" Jazmin asked Duncan. It was beginning to sound like the bond between Veronica and Duncan had been stronger than Jazmin had previous thought.
"When I came back to Neptune last June, I'll admit Veronica was definitely the first person I wanted to see. We hadn't really broken up when I left the country with Lily. Meg's parents were trying to keep Lily from me. They were abusive parents and locked Meg's youngest daughter in a closet and did other twisted things. There was no way in hell they were going to raise my daughter! In fact, before Meg died, she made Veronica and I promise we'd never let them get their hands on Lily," Duncan shared.
"How did you finally get her?" Jazmin asked.
"That was all Veronica. She's got a gift for intrigue. She helped me plan a way to leave with Lily. The FBI considered what I did kidnapping. But there was no way I was going to let Meg's parents have my daughter. They could call it whatever they wanted!" he declared.
"So Veronica didn't get into any trouble for helping you escape?" Jazmin wondered.
"We staged a public break-up. No one knew what we were planning because we were no longer speaking. We planned it down to the last detail. Not even her dad or Wallace had an inkling. Of course, the police and FBI suspected her and questioned her, but they never found any proof. She risked more for me than anyone ever has," he told her.
"She must have loved you a lot to take such a risk," Jazmin observed, matter-of-factly.
"I thought she did at the time. I thought I loved her more than anything. But when I saw her again last September, she pointed out to me that if I had loved her enough I wouldn't have left, and if she had loved me enough, she wouldn't have let me go. I think she was right. It was hard being away, but I was never devastated being without her. And I know she didn't spend much time missing me. She and Logan got back together before senior year was over," he shared.
"They seem pretty tight now," Jazmin said.
"They are. It was a long time coming. Logan feels everything intensely, and he never really saw another woman since he first fell for her junior year. She is all he sees or cares about. After I left, they got even closer. They broke up a little less than a year ago. From what I was told, Logan tried dating Parker, Mac's roommate, for a while but he kept beating up guys on Veronica's behalf. He's insane over her. And no one has ever been able to make Veronica as insanely angry and happy as Logan! They really fit each other. I may have hated to admit that at first, but now I am just glad to see my two closest friends so happy together," he finished.
"Yea, they seem to really work. I never saw her with Piz when she was dating him, so I don't know how they were together. I just know that after she got back with Logan, she glowed in a way she didn't when I first met her," Jazmin remarked.
"I know. It wasn't easy for me to see at first. To know that the only woman I had loved, loved my best friend in a way she never did me puts things in perspective. It made me want to find that with someone, too." He told her this as he took her hand into his. "Meeting you and dating you, Jazmin, has made me dream again. It's made me incredibly happy. I know I've spewed out a lot on you tonight. But this is a New Year, and I want to start it off right. I want to start off by letting you really know me warts and all. I'm not perfect. I've made mistakes. But I'd like to think I'm a better man than I was."
"You're an amazing man, Duncan. I've been so happy, too, dating you," Jazmin replied.
Duncan smiled and leaned in to kiss her softly. "Thanks for listening. I know we should've talked like this before. I want you to know that no matter what you have to tell me that it's okay. You will receive no judgment from me. As you just heard, my past is pretty rocky and colorful too!"
Jazmin smiled and squeezed his hand that she was holding. "I don't know if my tale is worse than yours. We've both went through painful things and made choices we wish we could take back. Sometimes I think that fate is against me. A lot of things were always out of my control. Specifically, my dad and his business dealings. Not all of my dad's business practices are on the up and up—if you catch my meaning."
"Do you mean the Mob? You're Italian and live in Chicago, so it wouldn't be surprising if he has those connections," Duncan said matter-of-factly.
"I don't know anything for sure to be honest. And I can't say I want to know either! I just know that the older I got, the more convinced I became that something wasn't right. Not only was my dad always insanely controlling, but I wasn't allowed to be around many kids that weren't children of his business associates. Joseph's dad was the one he trusted the most, so he was the one I spent the most time with. Dad's never been in trouble with the law, but it wouldn't surprise me at all if he was connected to the Mob or something equally notorious. I know there's whispers and rumors about him. The fact that he didn't severe ties with the Romano family after what Joseph did to me spoke volumes. In my family, family is everything. No one goes against the family or hurts the family. I can't tell you how many times growing up my dad told Jason how watching over me was his most important job. Dad told him that it was up to the men to keep the women safe. But for some reason, that didn't seem to apply to me when I got older. At least when it came to Joseph Romano. My grandparents were furious at my dad for that. I realized I'm getting ahead of myself. I need to start earlier, or you won't understand!" Jazmin declared with a rueful smile.
"It's okay. Take your time," Duncan responded.
"First, I wanted to assure you that the Joseph you met today was NOT the one I grew up with. He started off a lot like my brother. He was sweet and kind and protective. I have no childhood memory that does not have him in it in some way or another. Naturally, I always had a big case of hero worship. I could never see any flaws in him. When we became teens, my feelings for him only intensified. However, he only saw me as a sister. He seemed to chase every girl but me. Jason knew how I felt and told me not to be upset that he was just sowing his wild oats. That one day he'd look at me and just see me. When Joseph was about fifteen, he started running around with one of our own local gangs, the Latin Kings. He even managed to get Jason involved for a short time. However, when I found out, I pitched a fit neither had ever seen before. I begged, I pleaded, and I threatened until they promised to stay away from the gang life. Little did I know that Joseph was not sincere and had no intention of doing so. He had been running drugs and making some money. Money his parents had no control over. He was also finding more and more girls willing to give him their attention, if you know what I mean."
"I think I do. Go on," Duncan encouraged.
"Anyway, I lived in blissful ignorance. We had a homecoming dance at school when I was sixteen that I got really made up for. I wore a pretty sexy dress for the first time and finally Joseph saw me. It was the happiest moment of my teenage life. Joseph looked at me the way I always wanted him to. He danced with me and no one else at the dance. Before the night was over, he gave me my first kiss. He was my first everything. Kind of like how Veronica was with you except with a much darker ending," Jazmin explained. She got up and walked around to the window. She felt in need of something else to look at before she got to the rest of her tale; she viewed the Chicago Skyline all lit up.
Duncan got up and followed her to the window. He put his arm around her shoulder in comfort. She rested her head against his shoulder for a moment. He was so easy to be around. He seemed to like her for who she was, and he didn't put pressure on her. It was so nice to be with him. She turned to face him.
"Have I told you how sweet I find you?" she asked.
"Sweet? That's every guy's dream!" he joked.
"How about sexy? 'Cause you're that, too!" she said. Then she lifted her chin up and leaned into to him to let him know she wanted to kiss him. He happily took advantage of her unspoken request. His arms went around her waist as he kissed her sweetly. She pulled back and smiled. "The rest of my story isn't very pleasant. Thanks for letting me take my time."
"You take all the time you need. In fact, you don't have to tell me everything now if you don't want to. I'll be here tomorrow, too!" he reminded her.
"I'd rather tell you everything now, so we can focus on just being together and enjoying the holiday," she said. She went over to the sofa and sat down. She took a drink of water. Duncan sat down next to her.
"Well, when Joseph and I started dating, it was serious right away. At least on my part. Jason tried to let me know that I should go slow and that Joseph was nowhere near ready to settle down with one girl. However, I had stars in my eyes. I was so happy, and I really believed I knew Joseph better than Jason. It was at junior prom that I finally surrendered my virginity to him. I thought it was a perfect night. He was so sweet."
"I'm glad for you. I always hated that Veronica could never say that about her first time with me. There was nothing I could do to make up for it either," he said.
"Yes, the first time is special. Joseph did manage to do something right. I gotta give him credit for that at least. Unfortunately, after it happened, I began to notice a marked cooling in his interest in me. A month after prom, I went to his house on a Saturday afternoon to surprise him. It was our sixth month anniversary. I had made a silly keepsake for him. I feel so stupid now just thinking about it. His housekeeper let me in. His parents were both gone. I heard voices and laughter upstairs, so I headed that way. I found him naked in his bed with two girls that I didn't know. It was so cliché. I stood there for a moment in shock. I couldn't form words. It was like a dream. Instead of jumping up and trying to cover himself, he yelled at me. He demanded to know why I was there. I had never heard that tone from him. Ever. I said nothing. I just walked out," she shared. She stopped for a moment, picturing the scene still like it was yesterday. That was the day she felt like her childhood really and truly ended. Things were never the same after that.
"That's awful! What a jerk!" Duncan exclaimed, sympathetically. He could imagine how awful that would've been for her. Thinking of the way Joseph baited her earlier made him really angry all over again. If he ever saw Joseph again, Duncan believed he might just have to hit him. Just once. Or maybe twice. He grinned mentally at the thought.
"Anyway, I ran home crying and Jason saw how upset I was. He demanded to know why. I told him, of course. He went over to Joseph's house, and they got into their first fist fight. It was pretty bad. They were never the same after that. Mainly because a month later, I found out I was pregnant. That was a nightmare! My parents and Joseph's parents both felt he and I must get married. Joseph put on a show in front of our parents. He acted contrite and said he was willing to do the right thing. I kept refusing. Jason never encouraged me one way or the other. He just supported me. I kept telling my parents that I would have the baby on my own. I would not tie myself to a man who obviously didn't love or respect me. They didn't understand my refusal; I had loved Joseph my whole life. He was young; he would settle down they said. No one could understand why I didn't do what the church commanded. They knew what was best. In their minds, it was all so simple. Marriage would make everything right." Jazmin stopped.
"It was good that you didn't rush into anything," Duncan offered. He didn't know what else to say. Clearly, things didn't work out because she never mentioned before giving birth. Surely, she would have told him if she had a daughter somewhere.
"Well, it didn't matter because when I was around four months pregnant, Joseph came over to my house. He came up to my room and started pressuring me to marry him. His dad was coming down hard on him. He at first tried the nice guy approach. When I kept refusing, he started berating me. I left my room to get away from him. I was hoping to find a parent. I walked down the hall and was about to go downstairs when he grabbed my arm to force me to turn back toward him. We argued some more. Finally, he got really angry at me and hauled off and hit me. Because I was at the top of the stairs, I fell down the very long staircase. I broke an arm and started bleeding right away. I had on a summer dress, so there was blood everywhere it seemed. At least that's how my memory remembers it. I lost the baby," she finished sadly.
"Oh, honey, I am so sorry!" Duncan said as he hugged her to him. Now he understood the shadows in her eyes when he first mentioned Lily. Being around her, reminded Jazmin of what she lost. It wasn't that she didn't like children. He felt relieved for understanding her odd behavior.
Jazmin rested her head on his chest. She hated talking about what happened. It brought back so many ugly memories and remembered pain.
"Surely, your parents realized after that what a waste Joseph was," Duncan said.
"Jason went ballistic as you can imagine. Joseph was at the hospital when Jay found out he was the cause of my injuries and miscarriage. He attacked Joseph at the hospital, but the security guards broke it up. Everyone was mad at Joseph, but Joseph was so apologetic and insisted he just slapped me, and he never dreamed I'd fall or have those injuries. I'd like to think that was true; he couldn't be such a monster. But it didn't matter what he intended. He hit me; I lost my baby. Nothing else really mattered. My senior year was a fog. It took me a long time to get over what happened. Losing Joseph and discovery who he really was hurt almost as much as losing the baby. It shattered my self-image and self-respect. I felt so stupid and naïve for trusting him. Jason was my rock. I don't think I could've gotten through school if it wasn't for him. He and Joseph were never friends again after that. He keeps Joseph from bothering me. He and my dad got into a huge fight over the whole incident. Dad was too forgiving and willing to brush the whole incident under the rug. For once, my grandparents agreed. They could not believe dad didn't cut ties with the Romanos. That's why I got to come to Hearst. They insisted that I be allowed to create a life away from Joseph and his family. It was the least my parents could do," she explained.
"They were right. I am glad your grandparents won that argument. I am sorry you had to go through that. Now I understand why you seemed kind of sad when I brought up Lily that first time," Duncan said.
"It's a bit hard to be around kids her age. My little one would be about the same age. I'm sorry if I offended you by my caginess or distance in the matter," Jazmin offered.
"No apology necessary. I'm just glad you are healing and can build a life away from your family," Duncan replied.
"Me, too." Jazmin agreed. "Anyway, that's my sad tale! How about we have a scenery change? Let's save the champagne and instead you take me dancing! How does that sound? I can stay here and feel sad, or we can go out amongst people and shake off the fog of memories!"
Duncan smiled at her. She was so different from any girl he had ever known. Meg always pretended things were perfect. Veronica always pushed things out of her mind and threw herself into work or cases. Jazmin faced things head on, but she refused to let them weigh her down. He couldn't help but admire her.
"I think that sounds like a fine plan! Being around people will be just the thing. We have at least an hour before midnight strikes. Let's go!" he said as he grabbed her coat.
As they headed to the elevator, Jazmin felt so free. Telling Duncan was not only a good thing for their relationship, but she knew that it healing for her. Keeping it bottled up wasn't healthy. No matter how much time had passed, she had to find a way to heal completely and let it go. Holding on to it not only gave Joseph power over her, but it kept her from allowing people to really know her. Because how can you really know someone if you don't know what makes them hurt? Jazmin knew that 2008 was going to be a much better year for her over all. She had a feeling great things were headed her way. She took Duncan's hand as they walked out of the elevator both happy to just be together.
*****Chapter End*****
