Author's Notes:
The next chapter is up! I was worried this one would be boring at first, actually (I usually finsd shopping sceenes boring), but I think I did a pretty good job with it. I'll have to warn you, though. While writing it, I happened to read the first five volumes of Bleach. And I thought Soul Society would fit in rather nicely. And once on that train of thought, I found several other settings from various anime that would also fit nicely. So this fic's become a bit of a crossover. I don't think you need to be familiar with the series to understand what's going on, though.

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. I also don't own any other anime that may be indirectly mentioned during the fic.

To Kiss a Tomato Chapter three

Sakura was standing in front of a large shopping mall. Or at least Anko claimed it was a mall. It looked more like an abandoned warehouse to Sakura. Currently, her'guides' were inspecting the front of the building. Sakura wouldn't have been surprised if they were looking for a secret entrance. They seemed to like things like that.

"Wait! I think I found it!" Anko was staring at the section of the warehouse wall she had been searching. "The pixies didn't hide it very well," she tsked, "so it must be trapped. Stand back."

Sasori grabbed Sakura's arm as he passed, dragging her behind a suspicious looking rock. A few seconds later, there was loud explosion, followed by a singed and smoking Anko as she joined them behind the rock.

"The pixies outdid themselves with that explosion. I'll have to tell Deidara they catching up again." Anko brushed soot off her clothes and hair.

"Um… are you sure this is safe?" Sakura eyed the column of smoke billowing up from where Anko had said the entrance was.

"Of course not! Safe is boring." Anko replied cheerfully. "Well, time to shop!" With that Anko bounded out of their little shelter, closely followed by Sasori. After a moment's hesitation, Sakura sighed and followed.

Despite preparing herself for the worst, she gaped at the huge hole in the warehouse wall. Even stranger than the hole, though, was the swirling blue vortex on the other side of it. Sakura sighed. She should have known secret doors were too mundane for these people.

Sasori seemed unimpressed by the pretty colours, much to Anko's annoyance. "You can at least pretend to be excited," she muttered to him sullenly.

"I am excited. You just overstate everything." His tone was remarkably bored for someone who had just claimed to be excited.

"And you understate everything!" she huffed. Turning to Sakura, her attitude did a complete 180. "Never mind Mr. Party Crasher over here, Sakura. You're going to have so mush fun here."

Somehow Sakura doubted that, but she didn't say anything. It would probably have just encouraged Anko to prove that the place was fun. And that might be fatal.


Not for the first time, Sakura wondered what she had done to deserve being stuck with these people. She was currently standing outside a glowing clothing store (when she asked why it was glowing she'd gotten pitying looks and "she must be new" comments. It was all very reassuring). A few feet away, Anko was engaged in a heated argument with a guy that had come sort of flat bone protruding from his head and strange markings covering his face and arms. Sakura had long ago decided she didn't want to know what race he was.

"I'm telling you it's a fruit!" Nobody was quite sure how the argument had degenerated into the famed tomato debate, and they didn't particularly care, either. They were too busy taking sides and developing new grudges (as if they didn't have enough already).

"And I'm telling you you're an idiot. It is clearly a vegetable." Not quite animated as Anko, the alien-looking man was nevertheless just as devoted to his view as she was.

"What do you know about tomatoes? I happen to live with a vampire who's obsessed with them. I ought to know what they are." She neglected to mention that most Uchiha believed that tomato to be a vegetable, and that the tomato-obsessed Uchiha in question had never voiced his opinion on the subject.

The man was unimpressed. "As far as I'm concerned, everybody who lives in the Crazy House(1)," what other people called the theme park apparently, "isn't qualified to give their opinion on anything."

This seemed to make Anko angry. "According to a lot of people, anybody whose part of the Society isn't qualified to give their opinion on anything."

Sasori watched her from beside Sakura, a spark of interest lighting his eyes for the first time since Sakura had met him. She looked at him curiously, noting the increased restlessness of the crowd watching the fight, and wondered at the comment. It had never occurred to her that these strange people had social and political problem, and now she wondered why. Perhaps these people weren't so different from humans after all.

"Well that's their problem, then, isn't it?" The man replied smoothly. "I could say the same for them. They're the ones still fighting with each other, after all." He said this with a smile, and much of the tension dissipated as the crowd nodded with approval.

Anko smiled as well. "You got that right." She turned back to the group, evidently tired of the conversation. "You're not half bad. I have shopping to do, maybe we can continue this later."

The man nodded silently, and melted into the crowd. Sakura was quickly dragged along to the next shop, wondering what had just taken place. She made mental note to ask Sasori the next time Anko left. Indifferent as he was, he seemed like one of the more intelligent of her new companions.

"Anyway," Anko was smiling cheerfully again. "We have to get you a theme." She scrutinized the shops they passed critically.

"A theme?" Despite herself, Sakura was intrigued.

"Of course! You know how all the Uchiha wear black and blue, and the Hyuuga tend to wear browns and crèmes? And I like trenchcoats? You need a theme for your clothing. And it can't be pink."

Sakura nodded, she had gathered that already. "Why can't I wear whatever I want? Besides pink, of course."

Anko gave her a horrified look. "But you have to have a theme! Not having one is just… unnatural."

"If you say so." Sakura decided she didn't really care. As long as she liked the clothes it shouldn't matter. She snuck a look at Anko's fishnet shirt and tenchcoat. She hoped she'd like them, at least.

"Glad you agree! So what kind of clothing store would you like?" Anko had somehow gotten a hold of a map and was now perusing it curiously.

"You don't know your way around?" Sakura ignored the question for now, instead she motioned at the map. Anko blinked, before understanding.

"On, no. I don't usually do the shopping. Something about always coming back with the wrong stuff." She shrugged. Sakura could believe that. "So, what kind of clothes would you like?"

"Um… nothing too strange." She'd been looking at some of the outfits in the crowd milling around them, and wondering if anybody in this store sold normal clothes. "Maybe clothes like I'm wearing now." Which was dark pink sweatpants and a pink tee-shirt. Beside them, Sasori sighed.

"Just take her to Thyle's Anko." There was a hint of impatience in his voice, and Sakura figured he didn't like shopping. It would explain the lack of interest, but Sasori seemed to know the mall better than Anko did. When Anko reluctantly nodded, he had led them down one of the narrower hallways of the mall (the place was like a maze, Sakura understood why someone would need a map to avoid getting lost) This hallway was much less crowded then the one they had left (since it was connect to the… door… Sakura assumed it was the main corridor), and the shops seem less eccentric. They eventually came to a plain (compared to the others) shop, a tattered banner hung haphazardly above the doorway identifying it as Thyle's All-purpose Resource of Human Apparel.

Anko made a face at the store, before following Sasori in. For some reason Sakura found that comforting. She hurried in after the duo, narrowly avoiding a nasty hit on the head as the door swung shut behind her.

The inside of the store was surprisingly comfortable, with wooden shelves and strangely floating balls casting a soft orange glow throughout the room. She was surrounded by a myriad of objects both familiar and foreign, but all of them distinctly human. Sakura saw a beautiful African vase sitting beside a delicate glass chess set; a rack of kimono set next to the latest style of tank tops. It was to this section of the store Sakura followed her guides to, and she noted with relief thevariety of relatively normal clothed displayed there.

"I still think this place is boring." Anko complained, wandering off slightly to poke at the jewellery hung nearby.

"Just because you think it's boring doesn't mean Sakura can't shop here." Sasori reasoned with her patiently. "She was human until just a day or two ago, remember. Much of the clothing in the society must be strange to her."

Anko glared back at him. "Why do you always have to be reasonable?" She turned pointedly back to the blue-diamond bracelet sparkling prettily in her hand. Pouting as she read the price tag.

Sakura tuned the two after that, focusing instead on finding some decent clothes.


Two hours later, a much more content Sakura walked out of what was now her favourite store with about twenty bags of clothes (most of which Sasori and Anko were stuck carrying). Anko didn't even protest, preoccupied as she was with her newest accessory. Sakura had been a little surprised when Sasori had added the bracelet to the pile of clothes at the checkout. Anko, on the other hand, had been ecstatic, and promptly glomped him.

The pink-haired vampire was interrupted from her peaceful thoughts by a large explosion down by the entrance of the hallway. All around them, customers stopped their milling ( a favourite past-time of mall-goers) to rush to see the action. Anko, eyes honed in on the source of this new chaos, quickly joined them, dragging the other two along.

The cause of the explosion seemed to be from some sort of energy gone awry, if the whispered rumours around them were accurate. The crowd had formed a ring around the ones shooting energy beams- a woman with fiery red hair and cocky smile was facing a small girl with soft blond hair and eyes. What surprised Sakura was that the girl was holding a sword almost as big as herself.

"What's going on?" Sakura whispered to her guides worriedly. Anko was grinning from ear to ear as she glanced back at her.

"Looks like a duel. This one should be good. Raiya," she nodded at the redhead, "has never lost a fight, but Tsuka," she indicated the girl, "is gaining a reputation as a prodigy shinigami. Raiya probably challenged her."

Sasori snorted softly. "You can't remember where a store is, but you know the fighting records of every alliance member within two hundred yards." Anko pouted.

"How else am I supposed to know who to fight and who to avoid like a plague? Now hush, things are getting good."

Throughout this little exchange, the dueling partners had been fairly calm, perhaps looking for an opening. Now, however, the girl lifted her sword for the first time since Sakura had arrived and swung it at the redhead impossibly fast. The redhead was caught off guard and dodged too late, getting clipped on the shoulder. The blow, through glancing, sent the redhead sprawling to the floor. As the girl moved to follow the attack; the redhead erupted into flames, forcing the girl back as the redhead got back to her feet. Forming two fireballs in her hands, she promptly threw them at the shinigami. The girl dodged, causing the fireballs to hit the audience, who scattered amidst surprised screams. Unfortunately, one of the fireballs hit the area Sakura's group was in.

Sasori reacted instantly, scooping Sakura up and shooting into the air. Sakura gasped as suddenly there was forty feet of air between herself and the floor. She suddenly discovered that she was afraid of heights and clutched Sasori's neck in a death-grip. Beside them, Anko was shouting curses at the redhead. Unfortunately, she forgot that when fallen angels shout curses they're real. The redhead stopped as the first one hit the back of her head before
turning and launching another fireball at Anko.

Sasori sighed as Anko dove into the fray. "We're leaving," He called to her before flying off to a safer place, much to Sakura's relief.

"Will Anko be okay?" She asked him as they set down in a fairly calm part of what looked like a food court.

Sasori shrugged. "She does this a lot. She'll find us again eventually." He gestured to the restaurants. "Are you hungry?"

Sakura realised then that she was ravenous. "Yes. But I don't have any money." She sat down in one of the chairs, and Sasori dumped the shopping bag (Sakura just then realised that he was carrying Anko's as well) on the floor beside her.

"That's fine. Anything you buy today is on us. After that you'll have an allowance until you get a job." Sasori said in his usual calm, matter-of-fact voice. Right now, a little overwhelmed by the strange mall, Sakura found that reassuring.

"Sasori," she began, remembering the strange man's word from earlier, "What is the Society?"

He glanced at her as he followed her to the nearest restaurant. "The Society of Mythological Creatures began when a group of people from several races got tired of fighting each other. They were exiled when they refused to fight, eventually found each other and founded a sort of underground community. Word spread about us, and other people joined. It's gotten very big by now, and nobody can believe how successful it's been."

Sakura blinked. She had always thought of places like the one he'd described being peaceful. The way Sasori explained it, it was peaceful. Then why all the fighting? She asked him as much, and he seemed amused at the question.

"Just because this is neutral ground doesn't mean old grudges disappear. But nobody is really trying to kill anyone here. Fighting has turned into more of a recreational activity."

"Yeah, and even if somebody does die, we have an extremely complex system to avoid the shinigami until we can return to our bodies and claim we never died in the first place." Anko had apparently returned from her fight, looking rather charred but otherwise intact.

"And that's why both Reikai and Soul Society don't like us." Sasori gave her what might have been a glare except, well, it was Sasori.

"Wait," Sakura held up a hand to stop them. "So you guys fight for fun, and when you die you avoid the shinigami that come to get your soul." They both nodded. "And what are Reikai and Soul Society?"

Sasori and Anko looked at each other. "You explain it." Sasori offered. Anko grinned.

"That's a long story. You see there was once only one realm in charge of dead souls and such, and it was also in charge of protecting the humans from hollows, which are dead souls that have gone evil and mutated into monsters, and demons, who cross over from their realm to cause chaos every once in a while. But one day the leader of that place had twins, and for some strange reason they both inherited that throne. Well the kids couldn't agree on anything, so to make a long story short they decided to split the responsibility. The older one founded Reikai and took care of the demons, and the younger one founded the Soul Society, which takes care of hollows. They both use shinigami."

"So… then, which one do the dead souls go to?"

"Beats me. They probably have some complicated system for splitting them up, but I'm too lazy to find out."

"I see." Sakura thought a while. "How many other realms and races are there?" She had to turn away as the cashier inquired about her order.

"Surprisingly, not that many, realms that is. I think I know about half a dozen. Races, on the other hand, are hard to count. Every time you think you have all of them a new one pops up. Like that whole incident when the mermaids suddenly showed up and demanded to be recognised as a race right after the second time they made a list. They don't even bother anymore." Anko made a face as she pointed to the double cheeseburger and looked beseechingly at Sasori. "It's irritating. How am suppose to get a decent idea of everyone's strengths and weaknesses when 'everyone' keeps changing." Anko pouted and refused to go on. Around them, people were nodding in agreement, as Anko had raised her voice loud enough to be heard across the room. Apparently Anko wasn't the only combat-junkie present. As Anko got into an animated conversation with a passing werewolf about the fine points of armed combat, an idea suddenly occurred to Sakura.

"If souls go to both Reikai and Soul Society, and they have shinigami. Then where do angels come from?" She unconsciously lowered her voice, conscious of the many people around them.

Sasori got a vaguely annoyed look on his face and he pointed up.

"Oh. But where's that?" Sakura was confused. Did they live in the sky? Sasori just shrugged. He didn't know. Sakura found that mildly worrying.

"That's also something that's not fair. We were here first, why do these new upstart races have to go and take over everything? It use to be us that managed everything, back when there was no such thing as a shinigami." Anko was scowling, having abandoned her debate to rant further about the many wrongs committed to her convenience. "And we didn't even try to stop them! The Council just decided they didn't care!"

Sakura blinked at this, turning to Sasori for clarification. The angel sighed. "The Council decided that watching these 'upstart races' try and run the universe was far more entertaining than doing it themselves. That's what we've doing ever since. Well, most of us." He glanced at Anko, who's scowl turned into a wicked grin.

"Your council is made up of the driest, dullest angels I have ever seen. You can't blame me for leaving. Besides, black is much cooler than white." She displayed her ebony wings proudly. As they explained over their food, the angel's realm (and, as Sasori had indicated, nobody knew quite where it was, not even the people living there) was completely white. When a group of angels left to protest how boring their realm had gotten lately, they painted the realm they moved into black to make a point. Then they painted their wings black (they wouldn't reveal how), because they could, and because it matched the new décor. It was the main cause of tension between the two strains of angels, as the 'fallen' angels (as they called themselves after reading too many gothic dramas) were now blinded whenever they visited their old home, and ordinary angels tended to walk into walls when they visited the new realm.


Sasori leaned idly on a pure white wall, playing with the new dagger he'd gotten at 'Assassins' Tools', where he'd stopped with Anko and the new vampire before going back to the Park. It was very pretty, as Anko loudly exclaimed upon seeing it, it's blade cut out of metal so black it seemed to suck light in and a hilt with enough jewels and intricate carvings to bring out its full beauty. And it was enchanted to allow the user to become invisible a certain number of times per day.

"Nice dagger. You go shopping?" Sasori looked up at the voice, offering the newcomer a nod of acknowledgment.

"Yes. Anko picked it out." His voice was, as usual, disinterested, but there was a slight trace of affection in his eyes as he looked at the blade.

"You still like her?" The new angel was amused. "The way things are going you might not want to come back after this. You going to paint your wings black?"

"Hardly, Kayami. My exile's not up for another 200 years. I have to stay occupied somehow."

Kayami acknowledged that with a nod. "Good. That new realm of theirs is the worst place to visit someone, and my doctor says if I run into one more wall I could seriously break something."

Sasori laughed, which would have destroyed his reputation if anyone down on earth had heard it. Behind Kayami, someone poked her head out the door. "Are you two going to stand there chatting or are you coming to the tea party? If you don't hurry you'll miss the show. The shinigami think they have a plan to get rid of the hollows once and for all. And Sasori's visiting hours are up in a half hour."

Sasori and Kayami stared at her blankly. The angel sighed. "The betting pool's almost closed."

The two angels glanced at each other and high-tailed it into the viewing room.

End Chapter

Yeah. So there's a bit of an explanation of the world. I'll add more as I come up with it. Oh, and the pairings from the beginning are going to change somewhat. I won't say how, though. That's up to you to decide. I've already gotten a very interesting idea that I'm planning to write in as soon as it'll fit.