Tenko-Sama


Some events in this chapter may seem kind of rushed. The reason behind it, is that I don't want to spend too much time out of the village, since all or, or most of, the pranks take place inside the village.


Naruto was afraid. He didn't know what to do.

When he woke up this morning, he heard the sound of china and glass smashing against the ground. He had woken up to find the fox who had eaten his ramen last night, eating his cereal. Of course, he chased it off…off into the village; a place where he had been told by Jiji himself, not to go on his birthday, the Tenth of October.

He never really, truly knew why he wasn't supposed to go outside of his apartment on his birthday, but Jiji was the Hokage, and the Hokage knew everything…right? However…That fox…who had stolen not only his ramen from the night before, but who had stolen his cereal right in front of him…It needed to learn its lesson. So, without thinking, something his sensei at the academy he was really good at doing; leapt out of the blanket that covered his doorway, and chased the fox into the village proper with a wooden spoon.

Amazingly, nothing happened as they sped through the village. It was only after the fox had stopped did something happen to him.

He remembered seeing the kunai flying towards the fox, who jumped out of the way right before it hit it. However, because he was watching the fox, he didn't see the person who had landed behind him, and kick him.

He remembered turning over, from his stomach to his back…and then he was up in the air, dangling by the collar of his jumpsuit. He remembered trying to look back to see who or what had grabbed him…but he only saw white. A bright flash of white. The next thing he knew; was he was staring at the naked body of a teenage girl. A teenage girl who decided to show him a little too much of her naked body…and he passed out…Like a dirty old man.

Now, currently, he was sitting in the middle of a thicket, staring at the large, yellow-white fox; who was casually lying on its side, gazing at him in silence. Being so close to the fox, made him realize that it was no ordinary fox…of course, after what had happened earlier that morning and last evening also gave hints that pointed that out too. No…this fox, with its golden eyes, was much more…how to say it…cleaner…than the ones he had read about. That…and he had never heard of a yellow-white fox before.

'Maybe…it's that girl's pet?' he asked himself as he watched the fox closely. He hadn't seen the naked girl since before he passed out, so she would have had plenty of time to go off somewhere, and leave her fox to watch over him. It would also explain why the fox had such a clean smell to it. It didn't stink like he thought it would.

'Well, if it is her pet; then she better repay me for all the things it did…those plates and bowls are gonna cost me three months' allowance to replace!' he mentally cried. 'Of course…I could always ask Jiji for some help…' he closed his eyes and imagined what Jiji would say once he found out about the state of his apartment and his dishes. An image of Jiji wearing Iruka-Sensei's Oni mask popped up in his mind, yelling and screaming…a shiver ran down Naruto's spine.

However, that image was nothing compare to what Naruto was about to see when he opened his ocean blue eyes.

There, were the fox had been lying, was the naked teenage girl!...Or...would have been naked if it hadn't been for the positively old kimono that was draped over her curvy figure.

Naruto couldn't help but gawk at her slightly. It wasn't that he found the girl pretty…no. It was because she was lying exactly where the fox had been seconds before, but there was no sign of the fox any where! His breathing became quicker in the excitement caused by the appearance of the now clothed girl and the simultaneous disappearance of the fox. Suddenly, the girl smiled at him slightly…and realization slowly dawned on him.

This girl…she wasn't the owner of the large, thieving fox. Now…she WAS the large, thieving fox!

"Took you long enough, Gaki." The girl said softly, a mischievous glint slowly appearing in her golden eyes.

"…Y-You…you're a!"

"A yokai?" the girl finished for the boy who nodded lamely. Her small smile split into a large, un-concealable grin. "Mm…" she hummed for a second. "I guess I am."

What happened next, was not what the girl, fox…yokai…had expected.

Whereas most ningen would gawk at her for a moment before either attacking her, or trying to stave off her hunger; Naruto instead let out a girlish yelp and jumped back into the thorn bushes that made up most of the thicket that surrounded them. Of course, that action…only brought about more yelps…only this time, not of fear…but of pain.

'Why are all ningen I show myself too, so weird?' she asked herself as she began to sit up. Of course, the yokai had never visited a village who had been ravaged by a titanic kitsune yokai before either…not that she knew that though.

With a sigh, she walked over to the edge of the thicket and pouted cutely at him. "You know…" she began, as she brought an arm up from her side. "I may not be an expert on ningen and ningen greetings…but I don't think self inflicted pain is one of them."

--

Somewhere, a man with a large scythe sneezed loudly. "Oh…Jashin-Sama must be telling me to go greet someone new…" with that, the man with the scythe turned around and gazed at his surroundings. Not finding any humans, his eyes came to rest upon a small, innocent chipmunk. "Greetings rodent!" the man said with a crazy smile on his suddenly very cruel looking face. The small chipmunk did what every small, innocent chipmunk would do in that kind of situation…it pretended to be a twig…a twig with eyes.

"Jashin-Sama has told me that I must greet someone today! Unfortunately for you, there aren't any humans around at the moment! Soo…My name is Hidan!" the man continued. Bringing his large, sharp and glinting weapon up over his head, he continued speaking. "And this is Make-You-Bleed-For-Jashin-Sama-Kun!" the man brought the weapon down upon the tiny animal…only to miss the rodent…who was running away from the crazy human as fast as it could. "Get back here! Jashin-Sama has told me that you must die today!" and with that…the crazy man gave chase after the small, but ungodly fast, rodent.

--

"You're a yokai!" the boy shouted from within the safety of the thorn filled thicket. "You're gonna eat me!"

"Why would I eat you?" the girl asked, as she slowly stuck her right arm into the thicket. "You don't look like anything I'd want to eat."

"…" Naruto didn't know how to respond to that. One part of him wanted to yell and scream at the yokai for not saying that he was good enough for her to eat…and the other side wanted to yell, scream and then faint like a little girl. Unfortunately for Naruto…and the yokai, Naruto's smart-side, aka Smarty-Kun was taking a lunch break. So…one of Naruto's other personalities took over.

Everyone, meet I-Know-I-Should-Shut-Up-But-I-Don't-Want-To-Kun…or aka…Oops-Kun.

"Why the hell not?"

"Because…you don't look tasty to me." The yokai said with a sniff. This ningen was amusing…if not a little thick. 'What kind of a ningen asks a yokai why he isn't good enough to eat, anyway?'

"Hey!" the boy shouted back, his blue eyes blazing brightly. "I do to taste good!" and show his point, Naruto, temporarily being controlled by Oops-Kun, who was now runner up for Naruto's Most Dumbest Personality Award of the Month; bit his arm…and then screamed out in pain.

"Don't taste very good, do you?" the yokai asked, snickering at the boy as she did so. She latched onto one of his sleeves and began to slowly, but carefully remove him from the wall of her thicket.

"I 'it uh 'horn!" Naruto screamed in pain, sticking out his tongue as he did so. "I 'it uh 'horn!" he repeated. The yokai looked at the small, pink appendage that was now sticking out of the boy's mouth and stared at it…and then…burst out laughing at his plight. Indeed, there was a thorn sticking out of the boy's tongue. Actually, there were two…but she wasn't going to tell him.

Naruto glared at the yokai scornfully…before finding himself falling to the ground…and landing on his butt. Hard. It was a miracle that he didn't bite his tongue in half due to the action.

"YE-OUCH!"

"Kakakaka!"

--

It was getting late in the day, though neither Naruto nor the yokai noticed it. The sun had long since sat at its highest point in the sky and had started to sink back down below the mountains and forests. It wasn't evening yet, but it was still late afternoon.

Naruto was busy doing two things. One, was glaring at the yokai in front of him. The other thing he was doing, was occasionally sticking his tongue out and trying to see where he had pulled both thorns from his poor wet, taste…taster.

The yokai…well, she was still in her human form, and was still wearing the old kimono…however, she wasn't exactly looking at Naruto. No, she was currently looking at her long, blonde hair. Why? Who knew.

It wouldn't be for another few minutes that either party spoke to the other…or about anything at all. Why? Well, for one thing, Naruto was worried that if he started to talk, then his tongue would start bleeding again, like it had after he pulled the two thorns from it. That…and he was still afraid of the yokai in front of him.

Now, the female yokai however, was another story. She lived in silence. She would go to sleep sometimes and not wake up for years. Silence was nothing to worrisome for her. She was also waiting for the boy to say something first. Why? Well…two reasons. One, he was afraid of her, and if she started to talk to him casually, then he might think that all she was trying to do was trying to lure him into a false sense of security and then eat him…even though she had told him that she didn't like ningen… The other reason, was because she wanted to hear him speak, she wanted to see what it would sound like. When he had the thorns in his tongue, he sounded so funny, it was impossible to take him seriously.

The sun, as it continuously fell lower and lower in the sky, had started to make the shadows grow along the forest floor. As the shadow of a tree engulfed Naruto, he was shaken out of his stupor and looked around for a bit.

The yokai stopped playing with her hair, and watched him as he looked around. His face went through several different looks. One seemed angry, while another seemed tired. Then there was a bored expression…which looked like he was trying to kiss the air while looking all around him. Then…a new, but not foreign expression surfaced…along with a loud, growling. The yokai smirked slightly. Someone was hungry.

'Well now…it looks like someone's embarrassed.' She told herself, her smirk growing…However…a loud groaning sound rumbled out from her stomach region as well…and then it was her turn to look slightly embarrassed. Having looked at her stomach while it protested not being fed, she looked back at the boy, and found him starring at her, a trace of fear in his eyes.

"I don't taste too good…" the boy said lowly, backing away from her slightly as he did.

"Well, even if you did taste good, you're full thorns…I don't want to have thorns sticking out of my tongue…Looks painful." She said with a smirk. Her smirk grew larger as the boy grew angry at her comment.

"That was all your fault!" he stated loudly. "If you hadn't transformed, I wouldn't have jumped in there!"

"Well, if you hadn't jumped like a frog, then you wouldn't have landed in the thorns…And, it's not my fault you acted the way you did. After all, the first time you saw me, you passed out…Hentai." She cooed the last bit out, earning a right and angry red blush from the boy.

"That-Tha-That only happened 'cause I wasn't expecting to see a naked, pretty girl! If I had been expecting it, that wouldn't have happened!" Naruto retorted hotly, pointing at her.

"So…you think I'm pretty, do you?" she asked, still cooing at him. "But I thought that you were afraid of me?" the tone of her voice hadn't changed at all, which made Naruto blush harder. Anger? Or embarrassment? Most likely a bit of both.

"I'm not afraid of you!" the blonde boy snarled back.

"Then why did you jump into the thorns?" she countered.

"Tha-That was-I was-" the boy stammered in his anger. Oops-Kun was obviously not at the wheel anymore…instead, Anger-Sama was at the wheel…Smarty-Kun? He was still out for lunch. "You startled me when you transformed, nothing more!"

"Really?" the yokai asked.

"Really." Naruto nodded, almost sagely.

"Really?" the yokai pressed.

"Yes! Yes really!" Naruto shouted, scaring a few birds as he did so.

"Then, why were you so afraid of me eating you?" She asked, one eye brow narrowed, while the other was slightly raised.

"That's because you're a yokai!" Naruto pointed out. "And everyone knows that yokai eat humans!"

"I haven't heard that before."

"Really?" Naruto asked, before shaking his head. "Hey! Don't try to confuse me! I know what you're trying to do!"

"Oh really?" the yokai asked, earning another nod from the boy.

"You're trying to get me to lower my guard so you can eat me or kill me!"

"Why would I do that?"

"Because! It's the Tenth of October, that's why!"

"And that has…what…exactly to do with me supposedly wanting to either eat or kill you?"

"You're a fox, that's why!" the boy shouted, pointing at her angrily.

"Yes, I know I'm a fox…and you're a loudmouthed ningen." The boy snarled at her silently for her choice of words. "But I still don't see why that means I'm going to eat you…or kill you. And what exactly does the date have anything do to with it?"

"Because! Ten years ago!" the boy started…his anger seeping away slightly and his face darkened as he trailed off for a moment. "The Kyuubi…"

"Kyuubi?" the boy nodded. "What's a Kyuubi?" she asked. His head snapped up so quickly, it was only luck that it didn't snap his neck.

--

"You three understand what this means, don't you?" Sarutobi asked the three Anbu in his office. All three of them, one with an Inu mask, one with a Neko mask and one with a Hebi mask, all nodded. "If you find him, bring him to me immediately. Do you understand?" another round of nods from the three and he sat back in his seat slightly.

"…What of the yokai?" the Anbu wearing the Neko mask asked.

"If it attacks you, defend yourselves and either try to disable it, or eliminate it. If it does nothing, or isn't there, then two of you guard the one who picks up Naruto until you are in this room."

"Mm." all the Anbu nodded, as Neko hummed his response.

"Get to it." With that, the three Anbu left the room in a silent swirl of wind, leaving Sarutobi alone.

'Where are you Naruto?' he asked himself. He had tried to find him using the crystal ball…but it had no effect. 'I hope you are safe and sound.'

--

As he expected…the yokai was mad. He had told her about the Kyuubi and its attack on the village, and now he was regretting it.

'Now she's gonna attack it! Stupid Naruto! Stupid!' he felt like punching himself in the face.

The yokai…she was angry. Yes…But it wasn't they way that Naruto was thinking. She was angry, not at the village…but at this Kyuubi no Kitsune. He…She…IT..gave kitsune everywhere, yokai or not a bad name. 'No wonder he's so afraid of me…No wonder why that man attacked me.' She told herself as she sat on the forest floor.

Looking back at the boy, who was staring at her with wide eyes, she shook her head almost violently to get her out of her stupor. After a moment of thinking about other things…or trying to think of other things; she looked back up at the boy and sighed softly.

"Gaki…" his eyes narrowed slightly. "I'm not angry at you…or your village for that matter." This caused one of his eyebrows to rise slightly.

"How…How come you didn't know about the Kyuubi?" he asked. "I thought it was the ruler of all demons?"

"To be honest with you kid, I don't know much about this place…Or you shinobi for that matter." She replied.

"Huh?"

"I'm not from this world…I'm not from the Makai either, just in case you're wondering." She said with a small smile, though it only affected the right corner of her mouth. "I don't know how I got here, but I remember sleeping in a nice, dark cave after…uh…asking, for some sweets…and then the next thing I knew, I awoke to find myself staring at some weird man with red and black eyes…He said something, I don't remember what, but I remember telling him to piss off…Apparently that wasn't the right thing to say because next thing I remember; I was running from a large fireball he conjured from his mouth."

"I got away from him, but I found that I was very tired…so I took a nap…and woke up several years later…"

"How do you know it was years?" the boy asked.

"Well, before I went to sleep, I had crawled under a large tree stump and placed a barrier up around myself. There was nothing but other trees around the stump. When I woke up, there were buildings all over the place. To tell you the truth, it stunk really bad. Kind of like old sake and rotten food." The boy's face twisted at the mental image. She did to for that matter. "Anyways…I really don't know too much about this world. Where I'm from people either stay away from yokai, or treat us with respect." 'Okay, not all of them do…some tried to kills us…but still…'

"There weren't any ninja in that world?" the boy asked.

"There were some…but they couldn't breathe fire, that's for sure." She said with a laugh. "They're just really stiff, silent and seem to be perpetually constipated." The boy blinked at her for a moment…before he started to snicker. Then laugh. It brought a true smile to her lips.

"They sound like the Hyuuga clan!" the boy said between waves of laughter.

"Hyuuga?" she asked.

"A clan in Konoha…most of them are real assholes…They think their better than everyone else because they can see through things or something stupid like that." The boy said, his smile dropping slightly. "They also like to flaunt their money too…"

"Sounds like someone needs to prank them." The yokai said with a nod. The boy looked at her with wide eyes. Truth be told…it was slightly un-nerving. "What?"

"You…You like to pull pranks on people?" he asked.

"Uh, hello!" she started, one eye narrowed in disbelief and the other raised slightly. "Kitsune yokai here! Kitsune love to pull pranks!" the boy actually had the decency to audibly call himself dumb for forgetting that fact. She smirked. "Why? You like to pull pranks?" she inquired.

"Hell yeah!" the boy shouted, jumping to his feet as he did. "I'm the number one prankster in all of Konohagakure! Uzumaki Naruto!" he prattled off, not even realizing that he had told her his name.

"Hmm…" the yokai hummed softly. "Tenko Kuugen," she started. "Astral Kitsune and mistress of pranks and queen of eating!"

"Hey!" he shouted in excitement. "You know what we should do?" Kuugen looked at him and couldn't help but smile at the mischief in his eyes. That…and the foxy smirk on his face. "We should totally prank those stick in the mud Hyuuga!"

"Agreed!" she replied happily.

"But what kind?" the boy asked, thinking about the various pranks he could pull off on the Hyuuga.

"What do the Hyuuga like to do more than anything else?" Kuugen asked.

"Hmm…" Naruto hummed in thought. "They like to look pretty, I think…and I think, besides throwing money around, they also like to drink tea."

"OOH!" Kuugen exclaimed loudly. Naruto looked at the female yokai, and asked her what her plan was. "Ever seen someone drink black pepper before?" He shook his head slowly. "Good…that's one thing we can do to them." She said, jumping up and down in barely contained excitement. "As for looking pretty…Kekeke!"

"What?" Naruto asked the girl, completely forgetting the fact that she was a yokai in the excitement.

"You'll have to wait and find out...KAKAKAKAKA!"

"…HAHAHAHAHA!" 'Wait! Why am I laughing?'

--

Hyuuga Hiashi was having a nice, relaxing time sitting in front of his late wife's mirror. It was only a few hours before the ceremony for those who fell trying to stop the Kyuubi no Kitsune, and he needed to make sure he looked pale. Even more so than usual. However, in the middle of powdering his face, a shiver ran up his spine…leaving him lost in the middle of a large white cloud.


Yay! Finally! DONE!

Four re-writes for this stinking chapter. Dang was it hard. I guess that will teach me to leave a chapter off without making a place to pick up at for the next chapter.

So, Naruto and Kuugen now know each other's names. Naruto, in his over excited way, has temporarily forgotten the fact that Kuugen is a yokai…and is eagerly awaiting to see what she's going to come up with for the 'Pranking of the Hyuuga'.

I have a challenge up on my profile…I've re-read it and it looks a little sloppy at the moment, but I will fix it later…(too late to do so tonight)…But if you want to check it out, by all means do so.

Kiity should be out next, though if I can't find the time to sit down and watch the 1st Naruto Shippuden movie, then it may be a while. Why is it taking so long for updates? Well, as I said, I'm not a writer who follows a schedule. That, and I have tests coming up in the near future and I'm still looking for work. Oh…and I've been sick off and on for the past week or so…and right now, due to cough medicine, I'm really loopy. Maybe because I accidentally took 'non-drowsy' medicine for the night hours…oops.

Anyway…I hope you had a good time reading, and please tell me about the errors…I'm afraid in my loopy state it might be kind of weird to read in some parts. I hate being sick…

Ja Ne!