KNL5- Yosh! new chapter and this one's pretty long!

Mai- Yay! That's so great! Isn't it great Itachi-san ne?

Itachi- ...

Mai- Itachi-san?

KNL5- Oh... Right... yeah, um, I'll have to apologize because Itachi's not gonna be in this chapter... Gomen

Mai- NANI?!

Itachi-...

Kneyly5 does not own Naruto! only the OC and plot bunnies!


Chpt.3 Vibes and Where's the Kitchen?


You know when you meet a person, you'll feel a vibe?

An evil vibe, a friendly vibe.

Well right now, I'm standing in a dark room, scared out of my wits, if front of a shadowy guy thingy.

Such a ruling vibe!

It practically oozed out of him, Itachi-san told me he's Leader-sama

The Leader of the Akatsuki

I replied, to a question that goes along the line of, " How would you contribute being here?" I told him I love to cook and clean.

" You're Hired." Was his answer." Go make dinner,"

Then the next thing I knew, I was out the door with an apron over my leaf green shirt, and a bucket filled with cleaning stuff.

Such a ruling vibe, ne? Where's the kitchen?

" Oh kitchen, kitchen where fore art thou, kitchen?" I dramatically whispered, trudging through the dark halls of the Akatsuki hideout, Itachi-san blindfolded me a few hours before we got here, something about ' procedures of not revealing the Hideout,' I could somewhat tell it's a lie, well, whatever ne? However I did feel alittle hurt since he couldn't trust me enough to know the location of the Akatsuki. Itachi has been acting weirder now, He even told me to lie about our relationship and only say that he brought me here. He's avoiding me for some reason, I'm really worried... Wait. He's kinda acting like Sasuke now.

Pfft.

Uchihas are reeeally full of it.

I shook my head and decided to make a left between two hallways, that's when I oh-so-gracefully collided into someone, and fell back with a thud with all of the cleaning tools all over the floor and somehow, somehow, the now empty yellow bucket acted as a hat for me. " Oi! Watch where you're going, un!" Shouted an angry tone, "Ah! I-I'm so so so so so so so so so so sorry!" I got up and quickly bowed to the stranger, " Whatever just help me up willya?!" I did as he told me, and he stared down at my form curiously, I fidgeted under his gaze and took a quick glance at him, long blonde hair, blue eyes, lightly tanned skin, rock-nin headband and taller then me. Curse the tall people.

Then he started snickering, " W-What? Is there something on my face?" I asked placing a hand to my right cheek, " No, un. I like your hat though," His snicker grew a little louder as I blushed in embarrassment, " O-Oi enough of that or I'll... I'll... I'll spray you to death!" I shouted while holding up a random cleaning spray, with that he burst out laughing, holding his sides to death. I lowered my weapon, also beginning to giggle albeit, " That was a good one, yeah," He said regaining his composure, " Coming from a small girl like you, who are you anyways?" I pouted yet grin as I stuck out my hand to him, " Emihana, Mai desu! But please call me Mai!" Grinning like a mad-man, I could feel a Devil-May-Care vibe from him as he shook my hand, " Deidara, un, why're you here? You don't look so tough." I slumped at his words, Why must people judge?! Wait... " I... Er..." Holy Shitake Mushrooms! What the hell should I say again?! I thought frantically, " Well?" He pressed, tapping his foot in impatience, " I... Came here as a cook and cleaning maid! Yeah that's it!" I shouted happily at my response, in which he brows rose, " Oh? And exactly how'd you get here without getting killed, un?"

" E-Ettou... A certain man... I-Itachi U-Uchiha! Yeah he brought me here!" He gave me a skeptical look before shrugging, " Sure, un. What are you lookin' for?" I grinned sheepishly, remembering what I was supposed to find, " The Kitchen, I'll be making dinner," He then gave me a fearful look, " Nani?" "... No one has been in that kitchen for as long as I've been here, yeah. It... Has never been used..." I blinked, in curiosity, " Why?" He gave a small shutter, " Reasons... Yeah..." I suddenly felt a chill down my spine as a roll of thunder suddenly played in the backround along with a flash of lightning, I jumped, " O-Okay... Well could you point me to the direction?" He gave me a look that that indicated that I must've grown another head, " S-Sure, un... It's your funeral..." He pointed down the hall, I smiled and decided to give him a hug, " Arigatou! Dei-kun!"

" AHAHAHAHAHA!! Dei-kun?! Oh man that was a F*cking good one!" Deidara groaned at the voice and we turned to its source. Two men, one with short silver slick back hair and violet eyes grinned maliciously at us, while the other, with striking green eyes and a mask, glared at me, I merely grinned at the two, " Hello!" I bowed politely, " I'm Emihana, Mai desu! But please call me Mai, I'll be the new... Maid and cook!" " Oh?" The silver haired guy said while looking at me up and down, " You don't say... You don't F*cking look like much though, pretty short,seriously." I deflated, Why must they... Pick on my height? I thought mentally crying. " So how's a scrawny girl like you came here?" He continued, " Go ask Itachi, Hidan... Yeah." Deidara grinned towards me.

" Itachi eh?" The silver hair guy or ' Hidan', walked over to me and took a more closer look, I suddenly felt uncomfortable.

Well why shouldn't I be?

I DON'T know him!!!

And he's looking at me funny!!!

You would feel the same too, ne?!

This vibe is too... Malicious.... I concluded with a sweatdrop, " Didn't know Itachi goes for the f*cking Lolita though, she's got a nice rack." He commented, that got me alittle tick, " Excuse me!" I said with a false chipper smile, " But I have to go to the kitchen, it was nice meeting you Dei-kun... Ettou... Hidan-san. And..." I turned to the last one that's still glaring at me, "... Kakuzu..." My smile faltered albeit, " Hai... Kakuzu-san..." I was ready to go before Kakuzu also said, "... If you break anything in there, I'll deduct whatever pay Leader-Sama gave you by 10% for each item you break," I sweatdropped and nodded before heading down the hall to the kitchen.

His vibe screams Money-Whore...



I gaped at the kitchen, or rather what supposed to be a kitchen, There's trash and bags of garbage everywhere. Everywhere. There's even trash on the ceiling! And it stinked. " HOLY SHITAKE MUSHROOM!!! WHAT HAPPENED HERE?!" "... We tend to have fights," " Don't talk to the girl you idiot!" I jumped at the soft and harsh voices, " Wh-Who's there?" I called, looking over around for the person, then yelped in surprise. Coming out of the ceiling, the ceiling, was a man... Sort of a man... I don't know! His face half black and white, the white side was smiling apologetically while the black side sweat and scowled with soft looking green hair and a venus fly trap appendages circled around him.

" Is something the matter?" " What are you staring at, meat?" He questioned, I blinked and slowly, very slowly, I touched one of his green fly trap, "... Whoa..." I finally managed to say, " That's... So... COOL!" I grinned in amazement while he blinked in confusion," How're you able to come out of the ceiling? What are these leafs for? Are you part plant? What's your name? I'm Mai!" The white side smiled awkwardly, " Er... A jutsu... It's for my protection... I believe so... And my name is Zetsu," " Now what the hell are you doing here?" Still with the smile, I blinked, " Eh? Oh, I'm the cook and maid, I'll be making dinner tonight!" The white Zetsu chuckled, " Really you don't say, would you like it if I helped?" " Don't you dare ask her that..." I ignored the last comment," Yes! Arigatou Zets-kun!"

" Z-Zets... Kun...?" I nodded happily, " Call me that again and I'll eat you." I just laughed that off, " Alright then let's get to work! But wait, what should I make after we finish?" " Put yourself in a stew and it'll be enough for me," The Black Zetsu said hungrily," Oh hush now," Scolded White Zetsu, " Sorry about that, perhaps some raw meat would do me good, don't worry I'll find a dead corpse somewhere," I blinked twice as I hauled a bag dripping of blood, " So wait... You weren't kidding about the whole eating me thing...?" " I'm sorry but no, I'm a cannibal," " Why the hell would I kid about that?" " OK... Let's just get to work then..."


We had so much fun cleaning the kitchen, He did ask me on how I got here and I told him like I told Deidara. Zetsu's a really interesting person, though, his black side would try to eat me. Luckily, I evaded every single plan he thought up of and White Zetsu would help me avoiding them by voicing out Black Zetsu's ideas. Black Zetsu's vibe said he want me in his stomache, while White Zetsu wants to prevent that. Isn't it wonderful to have a friend that redefines two heads are better then one? So now I looked over the now clean kitchen and smiled in approval. Turns out the kitchen is really big once you get rid of the heaps of trash.

The black marble counters and red wood cabinets shined beautifully as well as the five pot metallic stove. The black dishes embroidered with the Akatsuki clouds were piled neatly next to now garbage and dirty dishes free sink, The black and red tiled floor was cleaned away from the dust and grime. And it only took three hours! I wiped my brow in content, " Finished, now for dinner..." I placed a finer to my chin thinking what to do about the dillema. " Just check the freakin' fridge," I smiled, " Good idea! Arigatou Zets-kun," White Zetsu smiled whilst Black Zetzu growled in annoyance. I merely smiled more as I sauntered over to the big steel fridge, " Hmm... Whoa! That's alot of food!" My eyes sparkled in admiration of the fresh looking food, Chotto... How were they able to stay fresh? I wondered glancing over to Zetsu, who smiled and growled dangerously at me, I sweatdropped, It'll probably be best not to ask...

" Well... What do you think I should make Zets-kun?" He blinked, " Pardon me?" I grinned sheepishly, " I don't know these people and what they like so..." " Oh well in that case...How about some okonomiyaki, yakitori and nikujaga?"

" I would like to eat you raw instead," Black Zetsu said.

" Would you stop? She wants our opinion, we should help her or she'll die," White Zetsu said.

" Do you think I even care? I'll eat her corpse anyways," Black Zetsu retorted.

" Hmm... Oh that's a great idea! Arigatou Zets-kun!" I said, completely ignoring the fight, Zetsu blinked and slowly nodded, I cheered alittle, then turned serious and turned to him while also grabbing his hand, " Now there's just one thing I need you to help me with," " What is it?" " Can't you leave me alone?" I brushed off Black Zetsu's comment and continued, " I want you to help me with the preparations of the food. I'll cook them and all you have to do is taste them, ne?" " Hai... I don't see why not..."

" Well? What do you think ne?" I asked Zetsu nervously, I know that I said that I love to cook but I didn't say for people I hardly know. I really want to make a good impression to the Akatsuki, you know earn my keep. Weird, ne? I watch anxiously as Zetsu took a bite out of the nikujaga, then okonomiyaki, and finally the yakitori, and with each bite, his eyes widened more, " They're... Amazing..." " Really?!" I questioned, anticipation dancing all over my face, " If he said it's amazing then it's amazing so shut up before I change my mind on not eting you instead!" I giggled then decided to hug him, " Sankyuu! This means so much to me if you liked it!" White Zetsu blushed, " Come on and go outside!" I'm sure they're waiting on how I'll do!" I exclaimed pushing him out the door.

The vibes of these people are incredible!

It makes me wonder how're they able to put up with eachother's persona...

Mou... Now that I think about it... I suppose what makes them different brings them together...

Or they're just waiting for the right moment to kill each other off ne?

What if there's more members ne ?

Hmm... What about Itachi's vibe though ne?

I just realized that! Oh my...

His vibe feels... Mysterious and sad...

I wonder why ne?

What about me?

If I ask... What would they say?

What if they want to know about my past?

What if someone else knows?

... Emihana is a curse...

Where did Itachi-san go anyways ne?


KNL5-Well what do you think?

Deidara- Pretty good, yeah.

Zetsu- I find your penmanship... Interesting... I hate it

Mai- I suppose... WHY DIDN'T YOU PUT ITACHI-SAN IN HERE?

KNL5- Ettou... I have a reason... I think... Anyways, you'll get to see what'll happen at dinner! Itachi will be there ok? By the way... What do you think Mai meant by ' Emihana is a curse' ne?

Hidan- The hell should we know, you're writing it!

KNL5- Right... Gomen...

Okonomiyaki- a popular pan fried food that consists of batter and cabbage. Selected toppings and ingredients are added which can vary greatly (anything from meat and seafood to wasabi and cheese). This variability is reflected in the dish's name; "okonomi" literally means "to one's liking".

Yakitori- grilled chicken speared on sticks. All different parts of the chicken, thighs, skin, liver, etc. can be used for yakitori. The following recipe shows one of the most popular kind which is prepared with chicken thighs and leek.

Nikujaga- not seem typically Japanese since the main ingredients niku (meat) and jagaimo (potatoes) are historically not traditional Japanese foodstuffs. But Nikujaga is a popular meal especially at home. It is a typical "mother's taste" meal. The taste of Nikujaga may surprise you because of the ingredients sugar and soya sauce, and I am sure that the surprise will be a positive one