Hi again!!!

STILL NO REVIEWS PLEASE REVIEW, oh but thanks to the guys that did. Anyone who wants something added please PM if you do. I'll be having cross references with some of my friends stories – names of stories will come soon. Any way… TO WAR

Chapter 3 – 'For the Empe…'

'Right you lot!' yelled Stressius in the Munch Hall, already pissed off that they where due to attack that day, the Ultramarines supporting them 'Get to your stupid drop pods NOW!! The entire chapter started shuffling towards the exit – well when I say shuffled I meant kicking, screaming and punching trying to get to one of the nicer Drop Pods – half of them where falling apart from the Techmarine's laziness. (By the way this caused onions to be banned from breakfast... you do not want to know why). Stressius himself didn't need to rush – he has his own personal Drop Pod. You could always tell which one it was because it was the one one with hundreds of kick marks in the sides.

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'Everyone loaded up?' inquired the human less voice of the Techmarine over the SPO (Shipwide Pisser Offer) 'Ph well it's not like you can tell me… or I care'. And with that they where off – an entire chapters worth of Drop Pods where shot out of the Ship, knocking out of orbit and into the ship next to it, both following the drop pods to the planet below, buring up as they entered the atmosphere made primarily of a previously unknown element called Crapogen.

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Chapter Champion Placid hated re-entry in Drop Pods, the constant shaking and noise as they accelerated, forcing into the grav belts holding him in place, before the huge deceleration as they neared and hit the ground. This time it was worst than normal due the the Marines in bulky Terminator armour sitting either side of him, they where being dropped on top of the former PDF commander, now turned to Chaos. 'Could be worst, could be with a couple of Dreadnoughts – that annoys even me' thought Placid on the way down.

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Bolter rounds flew towards the Chaos Cultists lines, cutting them down. 'They must LOVE being shot, hay boys?' 1st Captain Jakeius said into the vox, holding down the trigger on his bolter, mowing down cultists as they left there trenches and he walked slowly forward, toward them. The 4 squads that hadn't been dropped by the command post, where attempting a full-frontal assault on a Church for the Chaos God Slaansh, that used to be for the God Emperor. 'Knowing Slaansh, them probably fucking every thing that moves in there, sir' commented a sergeant of one of the Sternguard Veteran Squads, just behind Captain Jakeius. 'Yeah, that... and more' said one of the members of his squad, chuckling to himself.

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It was a simple battle-plan, squads where to be brought in by Drop Pod, clearing the way for the vehicles which where going to be brought down via Thunderhawks. They would then slowly fight there way toward the main Cathedral for the planet, by which time the Sisters of Battle and Greys Knights would be there to safely destroy any tainted artefacts left behind. But they had bet on 1 thing – that the Chaos Gods weren't that impressed by the cultists, so would send little or no aid.

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The Chapter was near destruction, 4th company was gone, as where nearly all the assault marines in the chapter, the few remaining locked in battles to the death they would surly lose. The entire Ultramarines Devastator company was dead. The 1 complete company left where the scouts, they wern't in the attack. Only about 200 Astrates remained, attacking the Cathedral, in a last ditch attempt to capture at least some Holy ground. There was one lesson to bee learnt from this; 'Don't underestimate stupid people in large numbers'. 'Right you lot, it's time' Stressius said angrily into the vox, a first for him, NOT. the remaining men where pinned down in the Cultist's trench surrounding the Cathedral, holding back the charging cultists that where attacking from the buildings outside the trench's circle, ammo had become more valuable than spinach had done on board ships. 'It's our final attempt at glory, CHARGE' Stressius cried, his only remaining honour guard, Champion Placid and Colour Bearer Exsanguinous, jumped over the top of the trench after him as he sprinted toward the cultist's Cathedral. His melt-pistol overheated and he throw it behind him, hitting one of the men behind him climbing out of the trench in the groin. Another infertile Marines. 1st Company Captain Jakeius clambered out of the trench, 'Come on men' he screamed.

The Cathedral was surrounded by charging Astrates and a ominous rumble began. Screaming came from the Cathedral, followed by a deafening roar and what felt like a Earthquake, at least 12 on the Richter Scale, lasting about 20 seconds – the trenches where along way from the Cathedral . 'Crap, what was that?' asked Stressius to himself before into his vox, trailing off as he saw what was in front of him;

'For the Empe...'

Sorry this wasn't as funny as the previous couple of chapters, this one and the next one are harder to make funny than the others, but don't worry I'm not giving up on humour. I'd also like to repeat my apology from the last Chapter about the slow update speed – I'm in the middle of my GCSE's and I get about 3 hours a fortnight on this, so I'm not just trying to wind you up. Oh and on the small chapters, it's just one way of increasing update time (if only by a little) and also it makes it easier to link chapters – for me anyway.

See ya!