A/N: Hope you enjoy! I felt really bad about the long wait for last chapter and decided to update again. Thanks everyone and please remember this is utter stupidity! Next chapter out soon.
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Maddison Feldman didn't like anything cheap. That was clear from all the expensive jewelry that lined her walls. She had a fortune. That was clear.
"Good opening," Morgan remarked. "I'm sooo intrigued."
Garcia shot him a look, and continued.
She had long brown hair, so long it bypassed her curly structure and almost touched the floor. For that, she had nasty lower back problems.
"Really Reid?"
In her free time, which was almost all the time, seeing as she was so incredibly rich she had no need to work, she would do what she loved the most.
"This doesn't make any sense," Rossi inquired. "How is she so incredibly rich if she doesn't work?" The other's ignored him.
Burn things.
"What the Hell?" Emily exclaimed. Morgan gave her a look.
"Well look who wants to join us now. Weren't you..."
"Oh shut up Morgan."
That's right burn things. It was her passion. He had blow torches that lined the walls, matched in every place possible, even a fire place in her room. It was a serious problem, but such a burning passion.
"I have a fireplace in my room," Rossi interjected, he shook his head and rubbed his hand through his hair. "Oh Reid..."
JJ jumped in, "See what he did there?" She pointed to the screen. "Play on words, 'such a burning passion'. See?
"That's great JJ." Hotch replied sarcastically.
Garcia continued.
One day, however, when she was burning stuff, something went incredibly wrong. One of her servants, had walked in on her and in an act of panic, Maddison set her on fire (XXX Authors Note XXX).
"Hey we didn't see an authors note, Garcia did you miss something?" Emily asked, she elbowed Morgan before he could say anything.
"Just a moment my sweet." Garcia searched around the screen for a few moments. She scrawled up and down the page, did some of her tech magic, and by the moments end, had five very confused agent hovering over her shoulder. "Found it!"
"How did, did..."
"Baby, don't question the magic that is me. Now hush up everyone." She proceeded to read.
A/N:
"I'm assuming that means authors note." She shrugged.
Hey everyone! This is SuperBronyBrainBoy coming to you all! I am relatively new and this is my first story ever! ;;))) The fandom is a mystery, can anyone figure it out? I am really excited about this one! As for the ratings, some chapters will be rated M for safety. Next to the chapter Title is where the rating will be.
Garcia paused and revisited the chapter title, Aristocrats and Arsenics. "Well that's not true, it doesn't say a rating."
"Besides what does the M stand for? Mediocre? Mysterious?" JJ offered.
"Mature?" Hotch attempted. "It could stand for mature considering MA for us, is Mature Audience."
"And what's up with that user name?" Morgan laughed. "SuperBronyBrainBoy?
"Maybe our baby boy has a dark side! Ohhh! Let's read." Garcia squealed.
"But there's more to the author's note, look."
Depending on the mood I'm in some chapters might be SLASH, but that depends. But I can promise their will be ALOT of WHUMP! Major! So here we are, if you can't handle the mayhem, crime fighting, and surprises I have in store, you better leave now. What I have planned will blow your socks off. Don't say I didn't warn you!
"Wow, ok." Emily stated. "Interesting choice of words."
"What is all this WHUMP and SLASH stuff?" Rossi asked. He looked around at the others who just shrugged.
"You think we can handle this? This chapter is rated M apparently." Hotch joked, though he retained a straight face. "And there is a possibility it might just blow your socks off..."
"I must find out what happens!" Garcia exclaimed, leaving no room for any other discussion.
How did she do it? Why? It all just happened in a slit second. One minute she was alone, and the next her servant was laying on the ground, in ashes. She was...DEAD.
"Gee, really?"
Maddison liked the feeling of killing. It felt amazing! So she decided to continue. WOULD SHE EVER STOP?! She began burning people left and right, piling up hundreds of bodies before finally the authorities decided to call in reinforcements. They needed help, no more people could die!
"This is so inaccurate. The authorities wouldn't wait for a hundred people to die before calling in the FBI. How does Reid not know that?" JJ inquired, she rubbed her temple. Writing was not one of Reid's strong suits. Clearly.
"FBI, you are needed!" Officer Roger yelled over the phone. "Come now we have an emergency!" Agent Hotch rallied his team up, "We have a problem. Kansas needs our help!"
"Hey look Hotch, it's you!" Garcia exclaimed.
Hotch groaned, "That's just great."
The tall, dark, and handsome Agent even in the face of danger kept his cool.
Morgan and Emily broke out laughing at the sight of Hotch's bewildered expression. He looked upon the computer in horror.
"Wait, what?" Hotch yelled. "Why would he describe me like that?"
Though this was quite disturbing, the others couldn't help but laugh. Even in a perfect world, Hotch never got flabbergasted.
He walked swiftly, hips swaying in-
"Skip it!" Hotch growled.
step. He was heading to his Agent. The Agent. It was clear, they would need his help. He cleared his throat and straightened his tie. He sprayed a little clone just to be safe.
"Come in." Came the low and manly voice.
"Oh Reid, just stop!"
Hotch saw him and felt himself become insecure. This man before him was so intimidating. "What do you need," he spoke.
"Insecure. Why the Hell would I be insecure?!" Hotch bellowed.
"We need you, Dr. Your the only one who can save Kansas!" The good Doctor nodded, and stood up. "I will do this! Have no fear! I will stop this crime!"
A few minutes later, Dr. Spencer Reid was in Kansas. He had flown at maximum speed. The FBI were coming, but they were going much too slow.
"So he is some kind of super hero now? He can fly?"
"Did Reid actually write himself as superman?" Morgan asked, his jaw slightly open. His eyes wide. Stunned.
The minute he got there, he saw Maddison. Matches and blow torch in hand. She wore all black and, oh, it couldn't be. She had gotten a hair cut.
"Wh-" Morgan began, but Rossi promptly cut him off.
"Garcia just keep reading."
"Maddison," The doctor began. "You are evil! I must take you in! I must put an end to your reign of terror!
"NO! NEVER!" She shrieked. She threw a match his way. He side stepped it, narrowly escaping death.
"I just can't...This is so-"
"NO MORE INTERRUPTIONS!" Garcia yelled.
He took a deep long breath and thought of something witty. "Your end isn't near...it's HERE, evil one! He froze her with his super breath!
"So he-"
"WHAT DID I SAY!"
The FBI arrived then. "Take her away." The Doctor said. He winked at Emily Prentiss, one of the babes of the department. She almost melted on the spot.
"Are you f-"
"EMILY!"
The fire wielder was still frozen, her fire was put out. Finally Kansas was put to justice. Hotch walked up to Dr. Spencer Reid. He gave him a sharp nod. "How do you do it?"
He didn't need to think, he winked at the handsome agent. "Sir, fighting crime is just another day for me!"
"Can I talk now?" Morgan asked. Garcia didn't yell at him, so he continued. "So he did write himself in as a superhero. The kids clearly got some serious issues."
"Mature my ass, that was like the worst story ever!" Emily yelled.
"There is so much wrong with this story." JJ seemed dazed.
"I'd say. Whats all this crap about Emily Prentiss melting, and winking at Hotch the tall, dark and handsome?" Emily demanded. "What is Reid thinking?"
The others nodded, with the exception of Garcia.
"Well I like it!" Garcia said, severely surprising the others. "I want to find out what happens."
"Yeah I do too. What else does this kid got in store?"
"We have some time, he won't be back for a few hours," Hotch added. "How long is this story anyway."
Garcia didn't say anything for a few moments as she checked. "26 chapters."
"Oh boy." Rossi muttered.
"Then we better get started."
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