August 2, 2004.

"It is very nice of you to show me around." Fay said. "I have never been to Japan before, and everything is so different from Europe."

She was walking down the street, outside the operations building. The August of Tokyo was steaming hot, and even in her low cut top and loose cotton pants Fay felt the heat. She couldn't understand how Matsuda, who was walking by her side, endured in his business suit.

"Ah, no problem." Matsuda grinned. "It is my pleasure to walk with you."

"You are very kind, Matsuda-san." Fay bowed her head. "I know you must have more important things to do."

"More important than showing you the nearest 7eleven to get Ryuzaki his daily dose of sugar?" Matsuda laughed. "What could be more important than that?"

Fay answered his smile. It was easy, he was a likable guy.

But he was not L.

"You are correct even if you mean to joke." She replied. "Ryuzaki… he is not like you or me, his mind is different. He needs the sweets to think, and thus we need to provide him with them. If he didn't get his fix, we would all be in trouble."

"You think so?"

"I know so." Fay corrected. "I have known him for a long time."

"Oh yeah, he said you were family."

Fay gave a sigh. "That is as good as a word as any. But we are not related by blood, if that was what you were thinking. We lived in the same place for some years, though."

"Wow, it feels so weird to hear someone talking about Ryuzaki's past - makes me almost believe he is a human after all."

Fay gave him a small, sideways smile.

"I'm sorry to disappoint you, Matsuda-san, but I mustn't talk much about it. You might have noticed, but he likes to keep some things to himself."

"Yeah, he sure does." he laughed.

By that time they had already reached the nearest corner, where a 7Eleven and a FamilyMart were both presented. Just out of curiosity, Fay chose the latter one.

It didn't took her long to pick the sweets she knew L would like. It wasn't like this was her first time shopping for him. There had been times when it had been a repeating habit. Soon her small shopping basket was filled with a selection of soft fruit candies, chocolate bars, koala shaped Lotte cookies with chocolate filling, and even sweet, honey and caramel flavoured potato chips - to give him something other than just plain sugar to eat.

Not for the first time Fay wondered how on Earth did L manage to get enough vitamins and nutrients to stay healthy. Maybe Watari hid them in his tea, or something. Maybe she should do the same.

Or maybe she should just stop worrying about him. But old habits die hard.

Fay shook her head to clear her mind. This was crazy! Had she really come all the way to Japan just for this? Why had Watari insisted that she came? Was it really for the Kira case, or-

"Wow, that's a lot of sweets!" Matsuda's cheerful voice interrupted her troubled thoughts.

She made a small laugh.

"It'll be enough for one day, two tops."

"Geeh, how does he stay alive eating like that?"

"His brain burns the calories, I guess." She shrugged. "I used to bake carrot cake for him, you know. To get him eat at least some veggies."

"Ha! Carrot cake as health food? That's a new one."

He insisted on paying, and Fay felt it wouldn't have been polite to argue, so she let him. But for a girl who has always had to take care of herself, and others, it was weird. As was the way Matsuda carried the plastic bags filled with candies, as if she couldn't have done it herself.

Though somehow it felt nice too. She glanced sideways at Matsuda as they walked side by side back to the operations building. He was a full head taller than she was, and he had the lean, toned body that looked neat in a suit. He was a nice looking guy with his a bit too long hair, his dark eyes and the friendly smile that always seemed to play on his lips.

He reminded her of her boyfriend, and suddenly a pang of longing hit her heart.

Ex-boyfriend. She had to remind herself. You left him, remember?

But still it hurt to think about it.

"Damn, it's a hot day!" she said, to get something else to think about.

"Yeah, it sure is." he replied, and turning to look at him, she noticed the small sweat droplets on his forehead. Instinctively she searched her pocket for a napkin.

"Wait a sec." she said, and as he stopped, she tiptoed to dry his forehead with the linen napkin. "There. You feel better?"

Matsuda's cheeks were burning on a way that had nothing to do with the hot weather.

He made a nervous laughter.

"Umm…. Miss Fay, would you like to have coffee with me, someday?"

"Matsuda-san… do you mean like a date?"

"Please, don't call me that, it makes me feel like I'm million years old. Call me Matsu, if you please. And yeah, I guess I do. Mean a date, I mean." he blushed.

"Oh, I'm flattered, but I'm sorry. I cannot have coffee with you."

"Why not?"

He seemed so disappointed, that Fay immediately regretted her words. Would it really be so bad to go to a date with this guy? Would L even notice if she did?

But just a thought of L's face was enough to make her heart skip a beat, and she knew she had done enough running away and hiding, for a lifetime.

Enough of playing with other people's hearts too.

"Because I love Ryuzaki." she said silently.

"You… you love Ryuzaki?"

"Yes. I have always loved him. And that's why I cannot have coffee with you, Matsuda-san."

A short silence followed her words. They were walking slowly now, and Fay didn't turn to look at Matsuda again. She didn't want to see the shock in his eyes.

"Does he know?" he asked after a while.

"Yes, I assume so. He knows everything."

"Well, not everything."

"He knows everything there is to know about me. But Matsuda-san… can I ask that you would not talk of this around him. He needs to stay focused on the investigation. I can trust you to keep this a secret, right?"

"Oh, alright." Matsuda gave a sigh, and a small laugh. "I have no luck in these things. The girls never notice me! Light has Misa, Ryuzaki has you-"

"Don't say such things. I would definitely notice you, if..." She shrugged and shook her head. "If things were different."

"Eh? You said you would notice me, if it wasn't for him?"

"Sure. You're very cute. But try not being so desperate - girls like guys who are hard to get, Matsuda-san."

"Still with the 'Matsuda-san'?" He looked so beaten that Fay couldn't help but feel for him. She gave him a small smile

"Alright, I'll call you Matsu if you insist. Just don't get any ideas."

"I won't, I promise! So no coffee, or asking you out?."

"No coffee. But you could take me out for a beer or whisky some night." it just slipped out, and she had no idea where that suggestion had come from. Hastily she added: "Just as friends, I mean."

"As friends, sure!" Matsuda laughed, and ran his fingers through his hair.

It didn't take them long to get back to the Operations Building, but the security checks were another matter altogether. When they finally got to the upper floor, and stepped into the HQ, Matsuda's cheeks had finally returned to their normal color.

But seeing L, made Fay's heart jump to her throat.

He had a black eye, a cut lip - and his hair was a mess, even more so, than usually. She had never seen him in such a state before.

The groceries (that Matsuda had just returned to her) slipped off Fay's fingers and fell to the floor.

"What happened to you?" she squeaked.

"What do you mean, Fay?" he didn't even turn his gaze off the screens.

"You… you look like you've been in a street fight."

"Oh, that." L stated matter of factly. "It's nothing. We had a slight disagreement with Light-kun, but it is settled now."

"Yeah, it happened earlier today…" Matsuda muttered. "When they were on the date with Misa Misa."

"And you didn't happen to mention it to me?"

Matsuda did the wise thing of not answering.

Fay glanced at Light Yagami, who was sitting by L's side, sulking. It wasn't until then that she noticed, he was in a similar shape than L. Bruises in his face were still red and raw, and for a moment Fay wondered what had L actually done to him. How did you even manage to fight, when handcuffed to another person?

"You kicked each other's ass?" she rolled her eyes. "Really? Do I even want to know, why?"

"I doubt it." L stated. "Did you bring me anything?"

For an answer, Fay threw a box of Lotte cookies at him. L was surprisingly swift, and managed to turn and catch it before it hit the back of his head.

"Oh, good!" he was genuinely delighted, as he ripped the box open with his delicate, long fingers, and began to stuff the cookies into his mouth. "Now you can read the file I left on the table, if you would. We'll discuss it later."

Without a word Fay sat down, and picked up the file, but her eyes were still on L, even if he didn't pay her any more attention.

He looked like a big child, crouching on his chair, hugging his knees and munching Lotte cookies. His hair was a total mess, his white shirt dirty and rumpled after the fight, and there were small blood stains in it.

Why do I love him? Fay wondered for the thousandth time. Why do I even bother? I could have Matsuda or almost any other guy with a snap of my fingers, and I choose that one?

But just then L turned around in his chair, his huge saucer eyes bore through her heart and her soul, and she felt like falling.

"Thank you for the cookies, Fay." He said, with the cool, dark voice Fay loved so much that it hurt. "I am glad that you are here."

"Yeah, don't mention it." she sighed. "Where else would I be?"


Please, let me know what you thought! Every review is highly appreciated! Thanks! :)