Disclaimer: All copyright to the WWE and it's competitors is solely owned by Vince McMahon. I only have the creative license to add them to my fictions and with that I am content. No copyright infringement is intended.

Summary: One superstar starts reliving his past, through visions and starts to realize he can change what he hasn't wanted to acknowledge in years. But will it give him what he truly wants and needs or will it end up in his own demise?

Series: Damaged Emoetry

Characters: Jeff Hardy, Matt Hardy, Trish Stratus, Shannon Moore and more.

Authors Notes: This chapter will be taking more of a first person feel only because it will be a fictional journal entry by Jeff to indicate a real event from his life but with my unique fictional spin on it. As always, read and review and let me know what you think.


August 30, 1993

If you could go back and rewrite history would you take the chance or would you just let it slip by? Do you really believe that changing the course of your life, at least the bad moments would change the person you have really become?

I have just been through the second most frightening experience of my life this past week and all I want to do is close my eyes, wish real hard and go back to that time, the time before it all happened.

First Mama and now Daddy. He was taken into the hospital today and diagnosed with a brain aneurysm. He could have died had it not been for his friend from work bringing him there. What makes me so frightened is, could I really do all of this life without at least one of my parents there for it?

If God saw fit to take my Mama away from me, then why would he go ahead and take my Daddy too. Matt was with me when we got the news, him having come home from college and spending the summer wrestling and causing shit.

Daddy had been acting strange all week, throwing out stories about his dead sister and just off the cuff sort of things that had Matt and I worried. We told him to get checked out but being the strong and extremely proud man that he is and was then, he just wouldn't do what his boys told him too.

I was so mad at him when i found out about the diagnosis. Why didn't he just take our word for it and get checked out before we had to all wait with baited breath to see if he made it through the night?

Did Mama make it so he didn't die that night? Did she send that friend to be with him because she knew that she couldn't?

Daddy is supposed to be in the hospital for the next two weeks, more out of precaution then anything else, and I have to say that as much as I hate hospitals after watching Mama die, there is nowhere else I want to be until he is up and around and better. I fear that leaving him will mean that the one minute I am not by his side will be his last and Matt and I will be left at this young age to become adults faster then we had intended.

I want to go back and change the past. I want to go back and make Daddy get checked out, I want to make Mama healthy again, but I just don't think I have the power to change the world that way. But you can be sure I would if I could.

Matt is back, our daddy is asleep now in his hospital bed, and the smell of death is choking what life i have left out of me. I want to close my eyes and change it all, to make it never happen.

Ours, this life, Jeff Hardy


He closed the journal and looked around the room. He heard the knock then, and told the person on the other side to come in. He looked back down at the journal, captivated by his ability to want to change the world even then, and looked up when Matt cleared his throat.

"You have been in this dank room for a week now Jeff. You haven't eaten a thing, and you haven't showered. You need to get up and get out of here right now before you go completely crazy."

"What if I said I was already crazy?" Jeff asked, his tone signaling a joke but his facial features dead serious.

"What are you doing in here anyway?"

"Reading my journals from when we were kids. Reading about when Daddy almost died."

Matt ran his fingers through his hair and took a long hard look at his brother. He knew that Jeff was different from everyone in the human race, but reliving some of the traumatic events of their lives was not something a rational person would do. Even a man like Jeff. "Jeff you need to stop doing that now. What good will it do to go back over those times?"

"I don't want to forget Matt."

Matt threw his brother a look of disdain and made his way towards the door. "Just get out of the room soon Jeff, and for God sakes, take a shower, it smells like a dead rat in here."

Jeff watched his brother leave the room and turned the main light back off. He turned back towards the journal and stared at the lettering. As the words became jumbled before him, he took himself back to that time, a week prior to the hospital stay.


"Jeffrey Nero Hardy, you are supposed to be in school right now what are you doing here?" his father asked, his tone angry and defensive.

Jeff put his hands on the old mans shoulders, looking him directly in the eye so that there would be no mistaking what he was about to say next. "Daddy, you aren't well, you need to get yourself checked out and for God sakes, you need to stop working long enough to do it."

His father looked at him, his head cocked to the side in a look of confusion, one that Jeff had seen many times because in his life it was a trademark look. He knew that his father had no idea what was going on at the moment, but he also knew he had to make the man understand before it was too late.

"You will be diagnosed with a brain aneurysm Daddy, in about a weeks time from now. You will be talking in tongues almost, reliving things about Auntie Joyce, so please, promise me you will get checked out."

His father only nodded, not understanding but seeing that look on his sons face that meant that he meant business. Jeff hardly worried about anything in his life other then his family, so if he was this concerned, Gil knew he had to take it to heart.

"Okay son, I will. Now you get back to school before the teacher calls me and gives me hell in a hand basket."


He awoke then, falling out the chair and feeling the wetness on his face. He opened his eyes and looked around him realizing he had no idea where he was, and just how he had gotten there. That was until he saw his brother enter the room and look down on him with his older brother glare.

"Jeff, your nose is bleeding again. You better do something about that."

Jeff immediately put his fingers to his nose, feeling the warm stickiness and looking down at the red coloring on his hands. He did indeed have a bloody nose but that didn't answer the question most paramount in his mind.

"Matt, where are we, and why in the world are you dressed like a prep?"

Matt laughed and slapped his brother hard on the shoulder as he got to his feet. "Why Jeff, don't tell me you fell asleep and hit your head removing all of your memories. We're in my house, we live here together."

Jeff looked around and took in his surroundings one more time, noticing that there was no record of wrestling anywhere in the room. Just what the hell had happened when he was dreaming?

"Matt, did Daddy ever get checked out like I told him too when you started college?"

Matt smiled again and then looked his brother directly in the eyes, seriousness shining through. "Yes Jeff he did, and the doctor credited you with saving his life."