Thank you again everyone for reading!
To AliMagna, Thank you for your review. Tried to respond to your review but you have PM's blocked *shrug* anyway, you raised an Idea for Petunia/Snape. Admittedly I had been thinking of that for a bit myself but, as I mentioned, Snape was adament that it be a no go. Yes, they grew up knowing each other. Yes, as Petunia is getting into potions they would have a lot to talk about and in a lot of ways I liked the pairing myself but... the problem... well, let me let Snape explain.
*Author steps aside to reveal the Potion's Master glowering behind her.*
*Snape rolls his eyes and steps forward with a swish of his robes and an imperious tug at his robe collar.*
What you Dunderheads fail to remember in your... excessive need... to put me together with someone is that...
*His voice switches to a low and angry hiss*
I AM A SPY. I have neither the time nor the luxury to engage in any affair with another person when we are in the middle of a war, a Cold War to be sure but this is War none-the-less. A relationship of such nature would put both myself and any possible... beau... in danger the likes of which your pitiful brains could not HOPE to comprehend. Would you LIKE to see myself or Ms. Evans... or whomever... tortured to death if my fellow Death Eater's are able to obtain even a HINT of a relationship? Merlin forbid that they realize that 'my beau' is a MUGGLE and HARRY POTTER'S AUNT of all things! If the Dark Lord even caught a hint of such a thing in my mind I would be DEAD and the Order would loose its' MUCH NEEDED informant. I may be Ignoring Mr. Potter more then I would in the original books but that is only because I KNOW what... *disgusted and rage filled tone now* That Whale did to the boy in your story. However... This does not make me a nice guy. This does not make me open to the IDEA of a relationship with either sex and, most of all, THIS DOES NOT MEAN I HAVE SUICIDAL TENDENCIES. Other stories may have me setting aside the duty I have assigned myself for a different path to redemption, and thus causing the largest target possible to be painted upon my back in the process, but for this story my path as a spy will hold true. You, yourself, agreed with me regarding this double-edged path.
*Snape glares at the Author and hisses out angrily*
Broach this subject with me again and you will find out JUST WHAT I HAD TO DO to be accepted as a Death Eater. Do remember that despite being the 'All-Powerful Author' you are still nothing but another Muggle.
*Author opens mouth to say something and he smiles slyly*
I am a Master Duelist as well as a Master Legilimens, *he says silkily* do you really think a gun is going to work on me like it might on that fool Riddle? Do remember that I was forced to grow up in a mostly muggle environs for a number of my formative years. Knowledge is Power and my knowledge includes both magical and mundane information. I don't need Magic to kill YOU. Enough gold dust ingested by a person over time can still cause death by heavy metal poisoning and, as it is not a common metal used to poison others, it is less likely to be detected by muggle hospitals. Would you like to find out just how painful of a death that can be first hand?
*Author closes mouth, shakes head and shudders under his glare. Snape stalks off with a huff. Author turns to audience, still shaking, and she smiles weakly.*
...Is it sad to say that that was one of the nicest of the rants I've heard him yell at me in my head when I try to think of ideas surrounding him...? He only allows me so much leeway before he snaps at me about something... I think I'm borderline certifiable that these things happen in my head so much...
Anyway. Thank you so much for the reviews. I do appreciate them! Onward!
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Chapter Two: Triple Trouble at Diagon Alley
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Despite the lack of heat the day of Aunt Petunia's tea party, she was able to convince the others that the heat had caused a bit of a mass delusion as far as the 'magically appearing letter'. She was able to convince them that it was a formal letter of acceptance of a 'specialized class' from Harry's 'amazing school' and that he had been trying to surprise her with it. 'Of Course' the letter hadn't appeared out of nowhere! 'Of Course' it had gotten caught on the platter hanging from the string and fell well after the small cakes! Wasn't Harry 'such a sweet boy' to try to make the day special with a little slight of hand?
With careful wording and a skeptical look from Mrs. Zinter, Aunt Petunia was able to shuffle her friends off with an apology after helping them clean up. Afterwards she rounded on Harry.
"What happened?" she asked darkly.
He frantically explained to her and Beth about the house elf, the 'dire warning' and the elf's attempts to coerce Harry into staying home. His Aunt sighed heavily at that and she moved to sit down.
"I will inform Dumbledore," she said as she rubbed at a spot above her eye. "I needed to contact him anyway to see if we can get your school supplies early."
"You want me to go this week instead of next week?" Harry asked with a blink.
"As I am going with you this time, yes," she grimaced. "I would like to avoid the rush of a school supply shopping crowd."
Harry thought about that for a moment, noting that Beth was nodding her head at the wisdom of his Aunt's words. If she was going to be a little more immersed in his Magical life then it was best to do so with controlled environments.
"Can I invite the Weasley's, the Grangers and the Malfoy's then?" Harry asked. "Sirius and Remus, too? That way you have a few trusted... acquaintances around that will be able to get you out quickly if there is a problem?"
His Aunt looked thoughtful for several moments before she nodded her head.
"That will be a good idea," she stood and moved to where she kept her stationary and fountain pen. "Go get Hedwig dear."
"Yes ma'am," Harry said with a smile, both relieved that his Aunt would be coming with him and that he wasn't in trouble with her because of that crazy elf.
As he went to his room to get Hedwig off her perch, Beth patted his arm lightly.
"Your Aunt is trying very hard. I worry that she is trying to push herself a little fast though," she said softly. "You will want to watch her closely."
"I know," Harry responded with a small frown. "I'm just so happy that she's giving this a shot. Going to the Alley when things aren't too busy is a step up from not going at all..."
He really wanted his Aunt to enjoy what she could of the Magical world and knew in his heart, despite being only twelve, that if something went wrong she might react poorly. 'Poorly' was putting it mildly though, he was worried she might end up having a panic attack at some point which is why he suggested contacting the other adults. They'd know more about what to do if she did panic over something.
Beth squeezed his shoulder lightly, "I'll keep an eye on you both, Dear Harry. Not to worry. I will watch her and let you know if she needs to leave quickly."
Harry nodded his head, relieved by his Imaginary's words, and took Hedwig into the main room in order to have her take the letter Petunia was writing.
-=-=*/*/*=-=-
The next day Harry, his friends and their respective families (including all of the Weasley's), all met up outside the Leaky Cauldron to get their supplies for school as well as pet supplies. Hermione had brought her cat, Crookshanks, along in order to magically neuter him. Draco had brought his own, new sleek black feline, ironically named Blanc (Xerxes, the garden snake that Harry had found last year and given to Draco, was shedding apparently and wasn't to be disturbed. Xerxes would still be used for communication between Harry and Draco, but Blanc was Draco's true familiar as, like Hermione's Crookshanks, the cat had chosen Draco. In essence, Xerxes was acting as a shared Familiar between the boys but was not bonded to either, in fact the snake actually got along with and behaved best for Narcissa more then either boy. And Harry was a Parselmouth!), for the same reason and Ron had brought along his new pet bought courtesy of Sirius; an owl. He needed supplies for the little guy and Sirius was set on buying the things he'd forgotten to get for the red-head's new familiar.
The owl, named Pigwidgeon by Ron's little sister Ginny (it was the only name the blasted thing responded to apparently), was a small ball of feathery fluff that was constantly flying around Ron's, Ginny's, the Twin's, Draco's, Remus' and Sirius' heads. Harry had to finally resort at one point to catching the bird like he might a snitch and holding him in front of Hedwig, at Beth's suggestion, in a desperate bid to calm the hyper fluff-ball of doom down.
Surprisingly the Snowy Owl's glare was indeed enough to force the smaller bird to calm down and after that he remained sitting sedately on Ron's shoulder.
Mr. Malfoy still looked to be a bit worse for wear. As much as he had his arm crooked for his wife to hold onto, even Harry could tell that that Narcissa was helping to keep him balanced and steady on his feet. Harry shared a look with Draco and he shrugged his shoulders.
"He wanted to be here today. He was pretty adamant about it," Draco told him softly. "Since he's been feeling a little better after some time in Saint Mungo's, mum didn't have the heart to refuse him the fresh air."
Harry nodded in response to Draco's words. Together the two boys managed to actually keep the other children with them corralled a bit better then the adults. All they needed to do was stop by each of the others and mention that both Petunia and Lucius were not doing well and 'would you kindly behave yourselves?' The Twin's actually gave a mocking salute but did cut back on their joking around after Draco and Harry talked to them.
While gathering most of the school supplies went smoothly, it still ended up being rather hectic. Mrs. Weasley had to break from the group and was now off trying to round up her brood, the Twins had disappeared into the joke shop, Percy had gone to meet up with someone at the ice-cream shop and Ginny had silently darted into the pet store. Things then hit a rather horrible snag just outside the potion's supply store. Just as Sirius and Remus started for the door, Professor Snape exited the building with a flaring of robes.
The tension in the air became virtually palpable.
Remus had gone pale at the sight of the dour Professor and Sirius suddenly looked like he was sulking. In contrast Snape's expression, which had been mild at first, was now blank of all emotion save for the anger in his eyes. For the moment, the rest of them might not have existed at all for the way the three were focused on each other and as such no one made a move.
Remus broke the silence first.
"It... is good to see you well, Severus," he said with a weak smile. "How have you been since the trial?"
"Well enough," Professor Snape responded coolly. His gaze never left Sirius'. "Taking the Mutt for a walk then? Have you had luck house training him as yet?"
Sirius actually growled and took a step forward. Remus grabbed his friend's arm but Sirius shook off the grip.
"No, Moony! Enough is enough!" Sirius turned back to the dour, and angry, Professor in front of him. "Do you even READ your letters? I've bloody tried to apologize a dozen times!"
"Apologize?" Snape hissed as he moved forward a step. "For being a bully and trying to get me killed by a..."
Sirius cut him off with a frantic wave of his hands. Harry noticed that Moony had gone as pale as his nickname and Beth was watching the exchange with a raised brow as she eyed the men.
"Merlin give me strength!" Sirius snapped out. "It was at the end of our O.W.L year! Fifth Year! Forget the fact that I spouted off the damned directions when I was just trying to get you out of my fuckin' hair, but do you really think that I fully realized what day it was when I was busy cramming my head with as much knowledge as I could? I was a slacker and kept put off studying for my O.W.L.'s until the last fucking minute! You know me and studying, you've taunted me often enough about it over the years! I wasn't thinking straight when I told you where to go and what to do!"
Snape sneered but he also raised an eyebrow at the irate man in front of him. Sirius kept ranting.
"Why in the nine hells do you think James PUNCHED me for being so STUPID as to FORGET the damned date when I mentioned to him that I'd told you what to do?" Sirius said with a growl. "Or did you miss the fact that James chucked a FIST SIZED rock in the general direction of MY HEAD when he dragged you back to the school and I tried to follow to make sure you weren't hurt?!"
Professor Snape eyes narrowed and he opened his mouth to let loose what was most likely a scathing comment. Sirius pushed forward and jabbed his finger against the taller man's chest.
"You're a fuckin' mind reader," Sirius hissed. "So read my fuckin' mind and see that I'm telling you the truth. I may have hated your fuckin' guts and I don't LIKE you even now 'cause you're a bleedin' arsehole and a minger, but I'd never wanted to kill your dumb ass. I'll admit to being an idiot, but I'm not a murderer."
Snape slowly looked down at the finger pressed against his chest. He reached out delicately with two long fingers to pull Sirius' digit away as if it were a piece of dirt. The Professor then tilted his head, almost a bird-like gesture, before he looked up through dark lashes to glare into Sirius' eyes. Sirius seemed to relax minutely, holding his hands out to his sides and meeting the taller man's gaze resolutely for several long, breathless minutes while the group watched.
Professor Snape snorted suddenly and turned to head further down the alley with a swish of his robes. He paused long enough to call back over his shoulder.
"This changes Nothing beyond proving without a doubt that you are an ignoramus that should not be allowed to breed, Mutt," Snape said in a scathing tone. "That you should put both Friend and Enemy in danger because you Couldn't Think means you should have yourself Neutered alongside the children's cats."
Sirius grinned in response. Harry wouldn't call it a 'good grin' or a 'bad grin' but it was a grin.
"Yeah, yeah," he said. "Go back to your dungeons and torture someone deserving of it, will ya?"
"Volunteering for torture, Mutt?" Snape snorted. "The Black Madness is plain for all to see. Ms. Granger should limit her time with you less the Madness is catching."
And with that last comment Professor Snape was out of ear shot. Sirius rolled his shoulders before turning back to Remus. Remus was still pale, but looked to be a little more relaxed now that the confrontation was over.
"Batty Bastard always has to get the last word in," Sirius complained, putting a faint whine into his voice. Remus started to say something but Aunt Petunia's voice cut him off.
"You nearly got him killed?" she asked in a high voice.
Sirius realized that he was now the center of the groups attention and that said attention consisted of several dark and various incredulous looks. He withered under the combined gazes and rubbed at the back of his neck. Harry saw the panic spread across his Godfather's face as he realized that Hermione looked to be the most upset, tears were filling up her eyes. Sirius just about had a panic attack when he realized that his little cousin was close to tears.
"Hey now! No! Shi..shoot! No cryin'!" Sirius moved toward her and she ducked behind her parents. The Granger's gave him cool looks. "Hey! Hey! Come on! Talk to me 'Mione, please?"
She peaked out from behind her Mother to glare at Sirius, tears still in her eyes, "You almost got someone killed and he said you were a bully as well. You admitted to... to being stupid... but is it true? Were you cruel as well?"
"I..." he sat back on his heels and looked at everyone. "I'm not proud of it. We thought it fun at the time..."
"I Hate bullies!" came the angry response from the bushy-haired girl as she ducked back behind her Mother.
Sirius was about to say something further, but Harry let out a choking sound and caught the older man's attention.
"'We'," Harry said, dread growing in his stomach and threatening to make him sick. "You said 'We'."
"I..." Sirius waved his hands helplessly. Remus rested a hand on his shoulder and silenced him.
"We were a group, the four of us," Remus said softly. "James and Sirius took... an instant disliking of your Potion's Professor. Peter went along with things for the fun of it and... I... I did nothing because I was terrified of loosing the first friends I'd ever had."
"Remus," Sirius started to say.
"No," Remus said firmly as he looked at Harry, Ron, Draco and Hermione(who was now peeking out from behind her mother again). "I make no excuses. I was the voice of reason for our little gang, and you cannot deny that we were a gang Sirius. I should have done more to curb you."
"We were kids," Sirius said softly.
"So are they," Remus indicated the group of children in front of them. "If we are going to be part of their lives then we need to set an example, a Good example, and that means owning up to what we did wrong."
Sirius flinched at his friends tone. Harry looked away from the two men and looked up at Beth.
"Why didn't you tell me that dad was a bully?" he asked her with a frown.
She raised a brow as she looked back at him seriously, "And how was I to know this? I only knew them after you were born, Dear Harry. I knew nothing of your Father and his friends save for what occurred after your birth and the men I saw were good men. I am no All-knowing Seer to have known the darkness of their past."
Harry flushed at the rebuke and shuffled his feet as he looked down.
"Sorry Beth... I didn't mean... I just," he shrugged helplessly.
"Tis alright Dear Harry," she shrugged and indicated for him to turn his attention back to the others.
Sirius was looking at the lot of them... well, seriously.
"I'm not going to make excuses, but I am going to explain how things started..." Sirius took a breath and shook his head. "Part of it was jealousy on James' part, he liked being the center of attention and Sni... Snape, was on the Hogwart's Train with a pretty, well off looking girl when he looked... poor and mangy looking. It didn't help that... the girl took an immediate dislike to James when almost everyone liked him right off, so he blamed Snape for that and made a few comments about how he looked. Things might have been left well enough alone but after Snape was sorted into Slytherin and the girl into Gryfindor and the two... remained friends..."
Sirius looked down for several long moments before he looked up at the kids. He was ignoring the adults at this point.
"Just... I grew up in a bad household. You've felt the energy there 'Mione," he said softly. Hermione nodded slowly. "I didn't want to be there, didn't want to become a follower of the Dark and because of my parents, their loyalties and their treatment of me... Mother was always worse the father about things but... I wanted to break with them completely. I became the first member of the Black family to be sorted into Gryfindor in almost fifty generations. Even being a Hufflepuff would have been better as far as my parents were concerned. I was never forgiven for it and never wanted to be forgiven for it and I am seriously surprised that I didn't end up disowned outright. I imagine father managed to convince mother that I was just stuck in that 'rebellious stage' and that they would be able to convince me to come back to their side of things. That and he probably put things off long enough before he died that she just forgot to blast me off the family tree afterwards. At any rate, I never did 'go back' to them. Slytherin to me meant Evil Incarnate. For one of my fellow Lions to be friends with a Snake... young as I was that meant that he just Had to be doing something to her, because who wanted to be around people like my Mum and Dad Willingly?"
The adults shifted uncomfortably and Mrs. Malfoy cleared her throat.
"It did not help that you came back to the school the next year and years after with a number of injuries caused by 'accidents,' did it?" she asked.
"Yeah, up until then I'd kept my head down; 'yes ma'am', 'yes sir' 'as you will'. Father would never try to kill an heir, but my mother? You never put anything past that woman. If I'd have been a girl she'd have probably tricked Father into leaving and either aborted me or, if the pregnancy had been too far along, drowned me at birth and claimed 'miscarriage'. She was that messed up," Sirius laughed darkly as everyone else looked horrified by his words. "I suppose that if it weren't for the need to protect my brother when I was younger and then the friends I'd made in your father Harry, and in Remus and Peter, that I'd have ended up with my own Imaginary Friend at some point. Sometimes I'm still surprised that I didn't end up with one. At any rate, I fueled the feud that developed between us and Snape, I wont deny it. At that age I thought all Slytherin's were evil and it showed in... my treatment of them."
"Was it... did that incident you were talking about change how you thought?" Draco asked weakly.
The blonde boy LIKED Sirius and Harry knew that he didn't want the older man to hate him just because of his house affiliation.
"Yeah, it did," Sirius said with a nod. "I might not have been thinking about things clearly because of the exams and Merlin knows I never would put a friend in danger knowingly, but James... he was so angry at me. He asked me if my hatred of Snape and Slytherin's in general meant that I was trying to get him killed on purpose. He... wasn't nice about it either. The punch I could have handled... his words..."
"What did he say?" Hermione asked softly.
"He..." Sirius took a steadying breath before he continued. "He asked me if I shouldn't have been sorted into Slytherin with the way I was acting at the time. He questioned why I had always egged him on as far as Snape was concerned. He even questioned... why I looked so happy when Snape finally broke ties with... his friend in Gryfindor, earlier that year after we pulled a... particular prank. It was a punch to the gut, to be told that I was acting more like how I'd always said a Snake would act then acting like a proper Lion."
Sirius shifted uncomfortably for a moment before he sighed. "Our little group... it took a while for us to make up. We left Snape alone after that and he left us alone, no more reasons to retaliate despite the anger built up between the lot of us, but... we weren't the same. James took things more seriously after that, enough to earn being Head Boy for our seventh year. We still pulled a few pranks every now and then but Remus can tell you that James made sure that the pranks were pulled equally across the houses and were never... malicious in nature after our Fifth year."
The group was silent for several moments before Aunt Petunia cleared her throat.
"You mentioned letters?" she asked.
"Yeah, my Healer at Saint Mungos said it would be a good idea to write down replies to the many 'We're so sorry!' letters I've gotten after my release," Sirius rolled his eyes. "I kinda snapped after getting one too many, started yelling things along the lines of 'why didn't you believe in me sooner' and 'if you believed in me all along why didn't you find out I hadn't gotten a trial and gotten me out sooner!?' She said it would be a good idea to write things down instead of bottling my feelings up and blowing up later, even if I never actually sent the letters out. It helped. After a bit I asked her if it was a good idea to write out... you know, apology letters... for times when I was stupid and hurt someone because of things. She actually said she was proud of me for taking the initiative and thinking of that on my own."
Sirius coughed and rubbed at the back of his neck as he looked at the ground for several long minutes before he looked up at Harry.
"It was actually a bit easier writing out the letters and sending them off to Snape then it was..." he fell silent before he started again. "I've got one that... I'm working on for you Harry... I just... Merlin, how is it easier to write 'I'm sorry I was a stupid git and thought all Slytherin's were evil 'cause of my parents and my desperate desire to prove I wasn't an evil snake myself' to Snape then it is to... to write out... to say I'm sorry for going off half-cocked instead of staying to look after you, Harry. You... you're my Godson... you should have been my First Priority."
Harry wasn't sure how to respond to that. He knew his godfather felt guilty about leaving him behind to go after Peter, to save or confront the man, perhaps even Sirius didn't know which because of his grief at the time. Harry also knew that he'd had a... a fairly good life once it was just him, his Aunt and his cousin. He wasn't angry at Sirius for that... more that he was angry at the thought that his father, godfather, Peter, and even Remus by default of not doing anything, had been bullies when they were younger.
People could choose to change, he believed that, he really did... but right now...
"Sirius..." Harry said slowly. "I'm not mad at you that you left me with Hagrid. You DID leave me with someone you could trust, so that's okay. But being a bully?"
Harry shared a look with the others. Hermione was biting her lip as she met Harry's gaze and she gave a helpless shrug. Harry knew that Hermione was smart and because of her smarts she had been teased badly over the years for being a 'know-it-all' before she even got to Hogwarts. Her parents had long ago bragged that she was reading college level material already at such a young age but Harry knew that her smarts tended to isolate her amongst her peers. He had wondered a few times why she hadn't ended up in Ravenclaw, but also knew she was a very brave girl to have embraced the Wizarding World the way she had. All said and done though...?
"I... WE, need some time Cousin Sirius," Hermione said suddenly as she drew herself up and spoke with as formal a tone as her shaking voice could support. "May we contact you at a later date?"
Sirius reacted like she had slapped him while Harry and the rest of the group winced. Hermione, as the now heir of the Ancient and Most Noble House of Black had been learning wizarding etiquette. As such, everyone else; her parents, Ron, Harry (who was heir of the Ancient and Most Noble House of Potter), Aunt Petunia and even Dudley, had been learning it as well. They all knew that those words were the polite way of saying 'Get out f' of my sight' and 'I will contact you when I am good and ready, DO NOT contact me OR ELSE.' Only the shaky and unsure tone in her voice lessened the hidden harshness normally held behind those words. Sirius gave a formal bow as he stood.
"I shall take my leave until such time as you find my company acceptable once more," Sirius responded just as formally and no less as shakily.
Harry and the others watched as Sirius led Remus away from the group a few paces before Apparating away from the Alley. Harry reached over to give Hermione a hug, Draco and Ron doing the same so they were in a loose group hug and she buried her face into Crookshank's fur. Her cat and Draco's, Blanc, both immediately started purring to try to calm their owners.
"Hermione?" Mrs. Granger said softly. "Do you want to go home sweetie?"
Hermione shook her head, "No... no Mum, I'm okay. Let's get the rest of our supplies."
The group continued their supply hunting, being rejoined by the missing Weasley's. After a small explanation as to why people's moods had plummeted, the Twin's got it in their heads to try to cheer people up with the tricks and joke supplies they had bought under their Mum's nose. Mrs. Weasley complained loudly at their antics, but Harry and the others took note of the fact that she didn't take the items from them nor move to stop the Twin's attempts to cheer up the group.
The mood did lighten up somewhat as they continued their shopping and had the cats breeding abilities disabled. Nifty thing about magic in that sense was the spells simply sterilized them without having to remove anything. Hermione confused the hell out of the adult Wizards when she said the 'cats were now shooting blanks'. Everyone, even her parents, ended up blushing brightly as the girl started spouting off information that she'd learned in the Muggle Sex Ed and Anatomy books she'd bought recently along with going over what she knew about firearms. This was also the point where Harry and the others learned that during the summer she was taking, and passing, exams to prove she had a muggle education as well as a magical education. Apparently the muggle education exams were a lot easier for her to breeze through as magic was a little harder for her logical mind to wrap around. Just a little.
The uplifted mood was somewhat muted though as the others could visibly see the Mr. Malfoy was loosing color and starting to look peaky. The last stop was the book store, by mutual agreement the adults had chosen that store last as it would be the one place they might well not be able to drag Hermione from. They'd made good time despite the confrontation in front of the potion's store and could afford to remain at the book store for a while. The group stopped as one near the store though and watched as they realized that stands were being set up for someone's book signing event.
Mrs. Weasley all but swooned when a poster of a blonde, blue-eyed man with a literally shining smile was set up outside the shop. Aunt Petunia and Mrs. Granger both let out an 'oh my' while Mrs. Malfoy simply rolled her eyes at the sight. A breech of decorum that, but the annoyance on her face was clear for all to see. Even Mr. Malfoy looked a bit put out at the sight.
"I know him!" Hermione said excitedly. "He's done all sorts of brave things and then wrote about them. He's face a Banshee and a Vampire and even Bigfoot!"
"Oh yes, all at the very same time too," Mrs. Malfoy said in a dry tone.
"Of course not all at the same time," Hermione said as she rounded on the older woman. "He's..."
Mrs. Weasley cut her off, "Oh, who cares about all that? You can't deny he's decent eye-candy Narcissia."
"Shopping around when you're married, Molly dear?" Mrs. Malfoy said with a smirk that belied the negative words.
"Oh, posh. It takes more then looks to make a husband Narcissa," Mrs. Weasley responded as she did something that made Mr. Weasley jump and blush. "But eye-candy is eye-candy and always nice to look at."
"Hmph, I'll have you know MY husband is both skilled and good looking," now Mr. Malfoy was the one to jump. He pinned his wife with a mild glare, though he too, was now sporting a mild blush on his pale cheeks.
"I suppose he is nice to look at, but that smile is so... flashy," Aunt Petunia mused as she looked at the poster. "Isn't it a bit much?"
Mrs. Granger echoed the sentiment even as she wrapped her arm around her husband's waist.
"And That's why he's just eye-candy dear," Mrs. Weasley said as she patted Petunia's arm and smiled at Mrs. Granger. "Not the sort to become seriously attached to that one."
The younger kids all shared a look before turning to look at the older kids, all of whom looked decidedly uncomfortable. Harry shifted a bit and focused on Beth while the three older women continued their banter.
"What are they talking about?" he asked her.
She snickered softly, "Tis' something to discuss in depth when you are older my Dear Harry. Until then, simply keep in mind a saying 'never judge a book by its' cover.' This blonde pretty-boy is obviously a fake no matter that Hermione looks ready to defend his 'exploits.'"
"Why do you say that?" he asked with a blink.
"Did you not hear Mrs. Malfoy? How is one supposed to face a Banshee, a Vampire and a Bigfoot all at the same time without dying a horrible death?"
"Oh," Harry blinked and his eyes widened in realization. "OH! Then he's..."
"A pretty fraud, yes," she snickered again before she looked at him seriously. "He most likely is using other peoples adventures and writing them out as his own from what she hinted at. The bit question, Dear Harry, is if he has their permission or not. I would..."
"By Merlin himself! Is that Harry Potter!?" came a boisterous cry from the book shop door.
Harry jumped half a foot in the air and spun around to come face-to-face with the living and breathing individual that the poster had depicted. As Harry watched the man flash his trademark smile and Harry saw that his teeth did indeed suddenly flash with an unnatural twinkle just like the poster. The man didn't move until the twinkle stopped and then he was suddenly shaking Harry's hand vigorously.
"Pleasure! Absolute Pleasure to meet you! Harry Potter!" the man called out. "I bet you had no idea that you would be meeting me! Dare I say, the Magical Me! Gilderoy Lockhart at your service!"
"Um... good to meet you sir," Harry said with a blink as he tried to pull his hand away.
"No no! No need to call me 'sir' right now, though later you'll want to keep up the show of respect I expect," Gilderoy flashed him another grin as Harry managed to get his hand free and back up so he was beside his Aunt. He took her hand silently out of nervousness.
"Umm... what do you mean?" Harry asked.
"Why haven't you heard the news? I'm to be your new Defense against the Dark Arts teacher!" the man struck a pose.
Seriously... he struck a pose, wand pointed outward, hand on his hips...
Beth face-palmed beside him. "Oh, by the Balance Eternal... you will be learning not a thing this year..."
Harry found himself silently agreeing with her assessment of the situation as he suddenly found himself being dragged into the book shop. His grip on his Aunt's hand resulted in her being pulled along with him. The rest followed along into the store with various expressions of amusement. The look on the Twin's faces filled Harry with no small amount of dread converning potential teasing at a later date.
Harry really didn't like being 'popular' and wasn't sure he would ever like it.
Even though it was a small 'audience', Gilderoy Lockhart went into a full spiel regarding his books, his book signing, his appointment as the DADA Professor for Hogwarts, his looks, his adventures for his latest book 'Magical Me,' signing a set of school books for Harry and each of his friends and then lastly signing and handing over free copies of 'Magical Me' to the older ladies and the two youngest girls; Mrs. Malfoy, Mrs. Weasley, Mrs. Granger, Aunt Petunia, Hermione and Ginny. The covers of the books beamed up happily at their new and now flustered owners.
The rest of the group tried to gather up their respective books as Lockhart continued to show off for the females of their group. At one point Lockhart snapped his fingers and grabbed Harry as he was trying to gather his Second Year Transfiguration texts. The man then shouted that he had forgotten someone and he 'truly hoped he hadn't offended', before suddenly signing one final copy of 'Magical Me' and handing it to Harry. The man smiled.
"I couldn't forgive myself if I forgot to give your Imaginary a book! Lovely woman! Saw her Image in the Mirror in the papers after the trial!" he said, blantantly ignoring the wizarding custom of 'don't talk about a person's Imaginary unless said person brings them up first'.
Beth moved over to Harry's side at that point, looking a bit annoyied, and reached over Harry's shoulder to open the book cover. The faintest tug of magic later and the book cover was open for her and Harry to view what Lockhart had written on the inside cover.
'The Most Magical Book for the Most Magical Friend from Magical Me!
~Gilderoy Lockhart'
Harry watched as Beth slowly closed her eyes and heaved out a heavy sounding sigh. She let go of the book cover much the same way Snape had let go of Sirius' finger earlier in the day, as if dealing with a piece of filth, and then turned to look for the rest of Harry's needed books without further word.
"Um, thank you for the book sir," Harry said, unsure of what to say beyond that as it was obvious that Beth was offended by the book or perhaps offended at Lockhart's mere presense in the store.
The man beamed at him before going back to his attempts to impress the other, visable, females.
Harry moved back over to Beth's side and suddenly found himself laden with several copies of second year defense books. He looked at them with a blink.
"Um, Beth? What are these for?" he asked.
"It is very much obvious that you will be learnin' not a thing from that blonde fop of a man, you nor your fellow students. Buy those quietly for yer friends. Ye will be learnin' defense this year if I must study those books and teach ye myself," she growled out as her accent got stronger and stronger the longer she spoke. "Tis plain as day tha' tha' PEACOCK ov'r there is naught but a bampot tha' cannae tell his heid from his erse. Glaikit roaster."
She rounded on Harry then with narrowed eyes.
"Dinnae be repeatin' none of tha' now, ye hear me? Tis nae somethin' ye should be sayin', wee bairn that ye are."
Right as Harry was about to agree to behave and never repeat what she'd said, a full blown, roll around fight broke out between Mr. Malfoy and Mr. Weasley that sent the children's collected books and school supplies flying around the room as the men bowled into people.
Even with everyone scattering to get out of the grown men's way as they threw fisted blows, Harry had enough time to grimly take note of the fact that Lockhart had darted behind the store counter to hide.
-=-=*/*/*=-=-
Read and Review please!
Also, word you'll have come across, 'minger', British term for someone 'breathtakingly unattractive'.
Sirius has always called Snape ugly so I figured I'd find a term he might use on occasion when really angry/upset.
I do hope I used these all the right way
*bampot - an idiot, unhinged person, scottish insult
*cannae - can not
*heed/heid - head "a've got a sare heed" or "I've got a sore head"
*arse / erse - bum
*glaikit - stupid ( ya glaikit bastard )
*roaster - someone who is making a complete cunt of themselves ("Here, did ye see that roaster oan x-factor the other night?")
*dinnae - Don't
*bairn - child
Also if you lot are wondering about how Beth's voice sounds? Think of a less scathing Morrigan/Claudia Black from Dragon Age when she is calm (all the tis and twas but with a carefully controlled tone) with a thicker scottish accent when she's pissed off. I think her accents supposed to be scottish/british mix for the game? Anyway... :-)
