Disclamier: Do. Not. Own

A/N: This takes a rather different path to the first post in some areas. I hope its better. You may recognise some parts-it'd be amazing if you did though! This is unbeta'd so any mistakes you find are mine and please tell me of them so I may fix them, currently may eyes are blurry with sleep and I'm mixing my words so this is the best I can do for now. I'll maybe get to return after a good rest. I hope you enjoy!

Thank you to those who reviewed! This is for you guys/gals/other! Your reviews really encourage me to get my butt into gear.


Days pass and slowly the excitement of Akkarin's return to consciousness dims and she is left longing for more; that mere brush of his mind was nothing but a teasing touch that lingered and haunted her. Within it she'd felt his love for her, his concern and affection yet it had been laced with the flare of confusion and anger. He was confused about the events leading to his current situation and from what he remembered, he believed her to have betrayed him, left him for dead.

She had been mess of tears as he'd slipped into the womb of healing sleep. Disturbed by his thoughts yet overjoyed at the touch of his mind, she had sobbed from a consuming mixture of relief and hurt and only after healing her own angst aside did she understand his feelings and thoughts; in his predicament she needed to respect his privacy and not dwell any more on the matter, there was nothing to be done until he awakened. Yet that fear of rejection and hate still remained within her thoughts and tinted her dreams.

Despite this, her health improves as he returns little by little. She grows stronger with each small twitch of his eyelids and shift of his head; soon she grows confident enough to leave him in the care of the wings Healers. She bids him good-bye each time and adds another minute away from him to tend to her own needs; another minute with Rothen and Dorrien, a few extra minutes to finish her evening meals, an extra hour to sleep in the mornings. Her health improves to the relief of many however little problems remain although she is too busy to contemplate them. Morning cramps and brief episodes of light-headedness accompany a poor appetite yet they mean nothing to the news that Akkarin has moved that bit closer to the waking world.

The world around her slowly rebuilds itself and inside she too does the same. The spires of the Guild return against the evening sky and she is there to watch the sun set. And she it forever grateful to Akkarin for this.

She sleeps sloped over his bed next to his warmth and is content as she dreams, secretly longing that someday they will wake together.

O~O~O~O~O

She dreams of a sunset, too beautiful and unworldly to ever be real, casting a golden glow over a small valley, it is magnificent and she watches it from her place by a tall figure in black robes who is not watching the surreal dusk but her and her alone. And in her sleep Sonea smiles.

O~O~O~O~O

She wakes as he remains asleep. She stretches her tired muscles and groans at the jerking protests of her aching back and in his sleep he sighs deeply but remains still, oblivious to it all. Smiling at him, she starts her day as normal; she bids him morning greetings, tells him farewell, she'll see him soon and leaves to tend her morning business, greeting those she meets with tired smiles and small waves.

He remains still, dreaming his pain away as the days and nights wear on.


"Lady Vinara believes that he will awaken within the next month. She's been monitoring his vitals and says he's almost there, physically at least. Her Healers have tried to call to him but they get the same result as me, his mind has closed off; he still seems quite lost within his thoughts. When I do get through to him, he's not quite himself, just a jumble of disordered memories and emotions; he must be horribly confused…" Despite the sadness and pity that laced her voice, Rothen couldn't help but smile to hear Sonea's light tones drift through the doorway. Knocking politely, he entered the small room to see her guest to be Takan, Akkarin's man-servant. He stood by his former master's' bedside, dressed in uniform befitting his returned servant status, a mixture of happiness and worry marking his tanned features.

Upon seeing Rothen he gave him a short bow. Sonea rose from her place by Akkarin's bedside, smiling tiredly, she made her way to him, wrapping her arms tightly around his shoulders in greeting.

"Thank you," she whispered, "I really appreciate you offering to sit with me tonight."

It was a pleasing way to think of their new arrangement, he thought. He was tonight's escort. The first of many to come. It was a temporary measure they, as Higher Magicians, had agreed on to assure safety within the Guild until Sonea and Akkarin stood before the King once more and had their lives placed in the hands of others. Such thoughts made him feel rather ill and he pushed them aside in favour of holding her tighter.

"It's nothing, I just thought the first night would be easier if it was with someone you knew. "

Pulling away from him, he saw her throw him an amused yet grateful glare as she returned to her seat and he made his way around Takan to sit in the one resting against the opposite wall.

"You should get back to the kitchens, Takan. Lunch is soon. I'll call for you if there's any changes." She paused, her gaze on Akkarin and then she added carefully, "Would you save me something to eat for later? I don't feel hungry just yet but later…"

Hiding his surprise but not his approval at her responsibility he watched as Takan glanced at him knowingly and nodded to Sonea.

"Of course, Lady Sonea." The man in question bowed obediently, both to Sonea and Rothen, before casting the man in the bed a wistful glance and leaving the room, closing the door behind him. The mans mannerism were odd, nationality aside, he behaved rather differently to other Guild servants; Rothen had come to understand that servitude was Takan's life style, a mind-frame, and not an occupation as with Kyralian servants. Sonea had once confirmed this, stating that, 'He knew no other way of life.' To think that Akkarin had once been subject to such a mind-frame, for how little time, still caused a disturbed chill to crawl up his spine.

From across the bed, Sonea watched him tiredly, dazed, a strange smile gracing her pale lips. A forced, exhausted one he had come to recognise over the years.

He smiled back. The silence between them was oddly comforting. It was a simple pleasure to once again sit with her, to see her smiling and happy after the weeks she had spent avoiding them all as she sunk into a depression. He was not blind nor stupid, Rothen knew her as he would a daughter and he could read the signs without Dorrien's poorly concealed hints. He was not happy with what he saw, per se, yet could not find it within himself to put that anger into words nor actions. He was, in some ways, happy for Sonea, yet he had doubts with the situation that he needed cleared and he worried for her. She had been suffering in silence for so long and had been through so much already, he didn't want further harm befalling her.

She was his little girl, his Sonea, and he would have no man, life saving or not, harm her in ways that could be avoided.

"He's just sleeping now." Sonea broke his thoughts quietly, still staring at him, that odd smile flickering. He took time to notice that her skin was not as pale as before, due to her increased time outdoors and the usual dark rings under her eyes were not as deep; good, she was sleeping better. Her well-being continued to improve each day and he was awfully thankful. There had been a time, not so long ago, where he had thoughts of losing her for good.

He nodded, his eyes drawn to Akkarin's' resting form on the bed.

Rothen had mixed feelings towards him. Currently he didn't know how to deal with the younger man. For weeks he had watched and observed how Sonea devoted her time and energy to him; he caught the worry in her voice, the fear in her shaking hands, the hidden touches and longing, heated, looks. He had been young once too, had once been in love and so very lost, not knowing what to do with his feelings; he knew the signs and read them well. He saw that Sonea loved Akkarin and cared very deeply for him. No one could force such devotion and affection. Not when their own well-being rested on the line as well.

Watching the rise and fall of Akkarin's chest, he wondered as he had many times before, if it was purely a matter of loving another, of a woman loving and admiring a man who she looked up to, or was it as Dorrien implied and of her being in love with him. At such thoughts he felt a parenting need to know if Akkarin could and would return such feelings if they were so. He felt familiar overprotective anxiety and anger at the possibility that he wouldn't. He disliked Akkarin, he had from the day Sonea had told him their High Lord was a Black Magician; he like so many others had trusted and looked to Akkarin as a leader and that trust had broken and remained as so even though he knew the mans reasons and supported them. He did feel shame at his anger, Akkarin didn't deserve it, even when it was justified. Too many times had this man had taken Sonea from him, too many times had he hurt her already. He was not a good man, he was a murderer, a lawbreaker, an exile. He ignored the whisper in his mind that told him Sonea was all these things too; she was only them because of him.

"I'm so glad, Rothen. He'll be back soon. I know it." Sonea told him, watching as his eyes trailed from Akkarin's face to her own. His kind eyes guarded but he smiled at the hope in her voice.

Rothen was not an arrogant man, he accepted that he owned Akkarin his life for what he had done, for him and for Sonea. For Kyralia. Sonea's improved well-being had spouted from Akkarin's own and he was grateful towards him for that at least. He would thank him for it if Sonea's words were true and he would wake someday. Since the night Akkarin had passed from being in a state of the living dead, Sonea had began to smile again. She began to eat more, joining he and Dorrien for lunch and dinner on occasion, she began to open up once again and spoke freely. She had returned to them and it had been Dorrien who had reminded him that Akkarin was the cause of her smile.

He was still not happy about it though, however grateful he felt.

"Do you think…do you think he'll be angry with me, Rothen?" she whispered.

"I don't know, Sonea." he told her truthfully. "Dorrien has told me that most who wake from such deep periods of rest often have memory loss. Perhaps he will remember none of it."

"He does. I know he does, I've seen it." her voice broke and that odd little smile fell apart, he remained where he was and let her open up, "He hated me, Rothen, he didn't…understand why I left…thought I'd left him to die and I think…I think he hates me."

With a pathetic whimper, she broke apart and her tears fell. In an instant, Rothen rose, his parenting instincts taking over. He made his way towards her and knelt before her, wrapping his arms tightly around her shaking shoulders.

"How can he hate you, my girl, you saved his life, Sonea. Once he wakes, it will be one of the first things he will be made aware of. I'll make sure of it."

"I just want him back. I just want to talk to him. Lords, Rothen, I want to tell him so much. I didn't leave him. I didn't and I haven't."

He simply held her as she sobbed, letting her tears of week-long frustration and fear soak his robes.

"I've wanted him to wake for so long, Rothen, but now…I'm so afraid of what will happen when he does."

"I know."

"I feel as confused as he is, I think."

"I think we all are in ways."

"It hurts, Rothen, in hurts so much sometimes."

"I know…"

"I'm sorry."

"Shush now, you never have to apologize to me."

Within the bed, Akkarin slept on, oblivious to Sonea's pain and tears, lost in a world of memories and dreams. Rothen envied him as he held Sonea, quietly whispering to her and trying to ease her into a state of sleep; for her eyes never left his face through her tears.


Bidding Rothen and Dorrien nightly farewells, Sonea opened the door leading into the corridor and greeted the young woman standing at the threshold with a tight smile. She quickly informed the Alchemist that she was returning to her room before leading the way there, the other woman's light steps following shortly behind.

'At least this one is respectful enough.' she quietly mused, making her way through the entrance hall, passing a group of brown robed novices gathered near the stairwells. Her last escort had been an older Warrior who had followed her around on her daily business, watching her with narrowed eyes as though expecting her to attack anyone who neared her and rather rudely invading her privacy to the point of disturbance. By the end of the day, Sonea had been at her nerves end and had shrilly shouted at him to leave the room and remain by the door until morning, after he had implied she clothe herself for bed with him in the room, under his 'watchful eye.' Thankfully, she had not seen him since and hoped never to again.

Neither him or the young Healer who persisted in asking her prodding questions concerning sensitive topics she would much rather stay clear from.

Turning from the University steps, she hit the cold air and inhaled deeply, making her way to the pathway trailing to the Healers Quarters she realised that their were just some people who she would just never gain respect from, no matter what she did. She knew most from the houses were reluctant to accept her part in protecting Imardin and saving Akkarin. Since coming to realise this, Dorrien had taken to loudly voicing his anger at the House's in public, much to Rothern's annoyance. He had raved loudly at how the House of Velan had shamed itself by refusing to acknowledge Sonea's part in keeping a member of its proud family alive and would only stop when Sonea reminded him of how Akkarin would react to him belittling his family name once he awoke. She was glad, however, for his support. Dorrien had reset himself by her side as the friend and mentor she needed and she admired him for it, very happy they could remain as such, overcoming his past feelings.

Pausing on the path, she took a moment to herself in the fading evening light, hearing the halt of the other woman's boots behind her. It was late, she had stayed at Rothen's later than she had intended, after the evening meal, and the sun had lowered and a night chill had descended. She watched as the world was cushioned with blue light and for the faintest heartbeat Sonea had felt something close to unrestrained happiness. She stood and watched as the last patterns of white and pink faded from the horizon, the distant silhouettes of the palace towers and city appeared unreal before the last light of dusk faded, letting the nights stars flicker through. It was beautiful in a simple way that befitted her mood, calm and sincere, and it graced her lips with a smile.

She didn't know how long she stood there. But when she came to, extracted from her thoughts by a soft touch on her shoulder, she realised how the chill had crept through her robes, through black layers and into her bones. Her escort smiled slightly at her,

"We should move on. It's cold, Sonea."

She sniffed. Her nose was cold and her fingers throbbed, she nodded in reply, her heart lighter and returned her journey towards the looming building and into heat.

Lady Vinara stood by the doors, greeting her with an uncharacteristic smile. She grinned at Sonea and motioned her forward. Sonea's heart gave an odd skip as she approached the older woman. Vinara wasn't known to grin, nor had she waited on her before. Hope rose to the fore and she smiled anxiously as her arm was taken and she was lead aside from her escort.

"Lady Vinara? What-" she began but was interrupted by Vinara's erect finger pressed against her lips, shushing her.

"Before you get angry or upset, I didn't call you publicly to avoid others listening in and out of respect for your privacy. I was on my way to get you myself when I saw you approaching."

"What's happened? Is everything-"

"Akkarin's showing physical signs of waking. Better than that, I'm sure he'll be awake by morning." She had spend so long waiting on those words yet her mind and mouth failed her. The last few days with him drifted to mind; she knew Akkarin hadn't long before he awoke. He had been gaining strength and each day his responses had increased in intensity. His mind was not penetrable but it was a conscious response, the natural state of his sleeping mind, it was at ease and guarded, no longer a never-ending storm of emotions and memories nor the blank darkness of before.

"His eyes have been flickering all morning but I…I didn't think it would mean so soon…he's been showing responses to touch since last week…I didn't-" Lost for words, she smiled at the Healer, eager and excited, her fears and anxiety submerged beneath her longing to see him awake and to have Akkarin back, to hear him speak and to talk to him.

"I was tending to his evening nutritional liquids," A disgusting potion of essential vitamins and minerals Sonea hoped never to have the displeasure to taste; it was given to those unable to fed themselves or those who had trouble swallowing solid foods, Akkarin had lived on a diet of the stuff since the Invasion. It had kept him alive despite failing to keep his weight up. He remained living, growing in strength yet he had lost great body mass and muscle from his days in sleeping.

"When he started to respond," Vinara continued, "He tried to swallow and clear his throat. He's been still since but given his recent responses I believe we don't have long to wait."

"Do you really believe he'll wake tonight, though? Do you think he'll remember? Vinara this is-oh! Let me see him, can I wait with him?"

The old Healer quirked a dark brow at her,

"What have you been doing all this time, Sonea? As though I could stop you. Go, I need to alert the Higher Magicians. I've a Healer in with him at the mome-"

The rest of her sentence was lost as Sonea smiled and all but ran towards the wing reserved for private rooms, her days escort remained behind, watching after her, blinking.

"You may as well leave," Vinara sighed, "She'll not leave now and I will be with her all night."

The young Alchemist merely nodded in understanding and moved swiftly aside to let the older woman sweep forward from the building.


At first, he didn't realise he had returned. There was no great revelation or sudden change in being. There was no intense pain or any lingering wariness from healing. There was just a heaviness that has always been, a bone deep solidness that he hadn't been concerned with before, and the pulsing of his heart within his chest, the gush of blood pumping through his ears. His muscles were tense and stiff, his back aching to be cracked and his fingers inching to bend; he needed to stretch, to move and release pent-up energy. But it was hard to move and when he attempted to do so, to move from lying into a sitting position, the strain of simple movement forced a weak groan from his raw throat.

The response is immediate.

All too soon he is aware of others around him, of voices calling his name in concern and alarm, relief edging the tones that seem foreign and familiar all at once. There is movement, the scrape of a chair being pushed back, the soft thud of boots across the floor, the rustle of paper and the fluttering of robes. He somehow knew he is in the Healers Quarters, he understood, somehow, that he had been resting and healing, sleeping away the pain. He was alive and being cared for, there was no pain, only confusion and stiffness; the urge to rise.

His eyes remain tightly shut, stuck together with sleep and his arms weigh him down, as though belonging to another, they do not respond to his commands and stay by his sides. His throat burned and the cool touch of calloused hands, lined with age, on his forehead was welcome, oddly familiar they moved to his neck and chest, their owners voice calmly speaking above him, telling him not to reach for his power store just yet,

"Remain still," she says and he knows that voice. "Wait a little longer, Akkarin."

Concentrating, he felt Vinara's mind brush his own. Instinctively, he formed a room within his mind to greet her; it was plain and simple, devoid of any personal touch, four walls and a door. He opened it and greeted her on the threshold of darkness.

"Hello, Akkarin." she smiles and reaches towards him as she steps inside. She is exactly as he remembers, thin and tall, she holds herself with pride, dressed in her Healing robes. He returns her greeting by stepping into her embrace; feeling her quiet joy and her happiness at the touch of his active mind on hers.

"I'm glad your well, Vinara." He tells her sincerely, letting his mind and body gently tell her in it's own way that that he was well and ready to rise. She held him tighter for a moment, then pulled back to smile reassuringly at him.

"Lets get you up, shall we. You've been gone from us for quite a while. We have been waiting for you, Akkarin."

And in the physical world, he could feel the gentle warmth of a small hand on his arm, light and hesitant, and he didn't need to question who.


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