Devotion or Destruction?

Sorry for the absence; I'm afraid it's likely to get worse now that Fable 3 is out in the UK! I'll try to update but it may not be as frequent as it was previously!

***Bioware and their affiliates own Dragon Age, I want Dragon Age 2!***


Chapter 3: A decision

One, two, three deep breaths. She stared at the wooden door, carved with runes and the flaming Sword of Andraste. This was the Knight-Commanders office and a place that all mages tip toed around and avoided as much as possible. She vaguely remembered Anders saying that the Knight-Commander's office was the second room that he frequented the most – the first being the cafeteria.

The very door simply ached with anti-mage feeling; the runes were there to ward and drain mana and ensure that all mages that entered were at a distinct disadvantage. She understood the necessity, but she still considered it gratuitous.

The longer I stand out here, the weirder it's going to look! Solona was vaguely aware of the Templar that had now been glancing at her uneasily for the past 5 minutes. She stood there, staring at the door as if it would some how answer all of her problems.

In the end she had not eaten much of the breakfast her stomach had begged for; instead she had poked and moved pieces of food around until the mages on clean-up duty prized it out from under her fork. It was stone cold anyway, so she didn't particularly miss it.

Then she had spent a few hours procrastinating in the library – partly reminiscing but mostly procrastinating. Finally, after a great dealing of sighing and resistance, she had made her way to this forbidden corridor of the Circle. It was the space where the Templar's trained, bathed and ate out of the sight of mages. It was the place that apprentices wondered and told terrible stories about.

"… Now or never..." she muttered to the door, steeling herself as she rose her hand and rapped on the door three times.

Cullen's muffled voice responded "Come in."

Solona gripped the handle, crafted in to a dragon's head, and entered the room "Knight-Commander." She said, looking to him as he sat behind Greagoir's vast desk.

"Solona." He nodded and motioned to the chair opposite him "Please, sit down."

She did as he asked and sat down, her eyes glanced around the room at the shelves of books and the sacred Chantry-relics. A statue of Andraste, a book of the Chant and even a bottle of fine Chantry wine from Orlais; such wine was often drunk during Chantry-approved holidays.

Cullen cleared his throat, drawing her attention back to him "So. I assume you have come to talk, yes?"

What else would I have come for? She wondered, tempted to ask the question but it was that part telling her to say it so she ignored the impulse. Instead she nodded "Yes, I suppose I cannot avoid the matter."

"And?" he was watching her, there was an amber intensity to his eyes.

"And what?" she replied, dumbfounded "I don't know how to answer that kind of proposal, Cullen. You say that you believe I am able to be a First Enchanter yet I haven't even been a Senior Enchanter. I have no idea how the Circle works; not the politics. Not dealing with Templar's and the general clerical work… I…. I.." she sighed heavily "I may be good for killing Archdemons and ending Blights but I did that with a lot of help and without any need for diplomacy or finesse!"

He smiled, a slight quirk of his lips, then he sat back in Greagoir's impressive oak chair "I see…"

"Um… that's it? I spill my guts and 'you see'…?" her eyebrow rose. Was he mocking her?

"I thought you would probably shy away from the idea, I expected an outright no to be honest…" the smile faded.

"Well… what now?" she replied, slightly irked that he had 'expected' her to shy away. She wanted to stand up and slam a hand on the desk and say I'll do it! but that would be foolish and impulsive; everything a First Enchanter was not.

"What indeed." He nodded, his voice maintained the distant control that she had gradually become used to since she arrived at the tower. "I stand by what I said; I believe you would use your judgement and do the very best you can for the mages."

"But is my best really good enough for them?" she asked, frowning.

"The fact that you are so troubled for them and what is in their best interests is reason enough for me to believe that it really would be good enough." His gaze was almost piercing. "I believe that you can make a difference to this Circle."

"You… believe in me?" it made her cheeks faintly warm to hear him say something so endearing; it may have been in his formal controlled voice but the words were full of encouragement. He, Cullen, believed in her and that she could make a difference. Surely, that was enough to give this a try?

"I do."

"Alright." She glanced at he nervously "Alright… I'll… I'll give it a shot." Suddenly she felt like Alistair; giving it a shot if she would.

"Very good." Cullen said with a nod of satisfaction "I am sure you will be an asset to the mages and the Circle, Solona."

"…I hope so." Part of her felt numb, was she really going through with this? It sure looked that way, she was starting to wonder if this was some bizarre fade-hallucination. Still, the handshake he gave her felt too real and so did the coolness of his armour.

She left his office in a daze, walking through the halls towards the guest room he had shown her to the night before. She needed to lay down, at the very least she needed to close a door over and do something – scream, punch a pillow, burn a rug… She walked in to the room and closed the door behind herself, propping a chair up against the handle.

She turned to face the bed and just stared at it blankly, her mind was racing and yet she couldn't grasp the thoughts or make sense of any of it. She was Solona Amell and she was the First Enchanter of the Circle of Ferelden.

Cullen said that there would be some formalities, a ceremony and that she'd have to make a speech. That alone was bizarrely terrifying; a speech? She usually left that sort of thing to Alistair or anyone but herself. Suddenly the realisation struck her like ice cold water; she was going to lead a collective of mages through a precarious future whilst attempting to negotiate a working relationship with the Templars; with Cullen.

Suddenly she felt very, very dizzy and nauseous. It was as if the weight of the situation had finally found her and bore down from above. She laid on the bed, staring at the grey stone wall and all she could think was; How am I going to do this?

The question occupied her mind fully until sleep claimed her and forced her to forget the constant wondering – Maybe tomorrow morning will make everything clearer…


End of Chapter 3


Like I said above; sorry if I seem to be a bit inactive for the next few days: got Fable 3 to play! :'D

- Drake