Breaking into fort Lunpa

A saving private hammet error.

Another story of mispelled randomness. No point at all plese note that you have been warned. From here and on there are no correct sentences.


Isaac and co were heading to lunpa in order to save Master hammet. A fat merchant who had adopted Ivan becouse of the advanges of having a child. He had also run over Garet with his wagon.

As they closed onto Lunpa they saw how the entire city was burning. Then they reached Lunpa the gate was mere ashes. The guards was rolling in the grass to put them self out of fire.

"Demons came and put us and the gate on fire randomly." The guards had long ago put out the fire on them but they keept rolling on the grass becouse it was fun

"Yes i belive they have gone to the fort to save Hammet." The guards hadnt spot Isaac or anything they were just random talking.

Isaac and co just left them in their grassland. Lunpa was burning quite good but just to be sure it would burn down, Garet unleashed a inferno.

The guards at the entrance of fort Lunpa was dead, It looked like they had feelt on their shoelaces and breaken their necks. Someone had left a stone with reunes carved in it

I wish to live in a world with no shoelaces.

Saturos year 2012. In hating memory of Agatio

"Thats weird" Ivan always liked to comment on what was crystal clear.

"Whats weird." Garet shaired Saturos wish of a world with no shoelaces. Shoelaces were murders they had reduced Fuc(K)hin temple pouplation by about 50 %. The rest had starved to death.

"Lets just move in" They stormed in like the kings cavelery. Through none of them knew what a king does and caverly had not been invented yet.


Fort lunpa was filled with out knocked blue guards, while all red guards was stil up ready to fight. Isaac thought it was more annoying then lighting Mars lighthosue.

They finally reached a dead end. It was in the shape of a hellowenn store called Dondonpas best bones. Something was clearly wrong at the store. First it was on fire, second of all their was no wares. Last of all Isaac couldnt find a cash deck to pillage. Which made the entire store worthless.

It was not until Ivan used reavel on the shop they notcied the undergrond basement. were several bodies was found as well as a much more imporant secret passage.

The group hurried through the passage. They walked through a elphant graveyard and killed several swines, until they finally reached Hammets cell.

Outside the cell laid Saturos and Menardi almost drowning in their pukes. Menardi slowly talked as she spotted the group.

"Mia i love you" Mis blushed and smiled. Menardi closed her eyes and fell into unconcious.

"Whats wrong with you?" Ivan was as always conserned about his foes.

Saturos spat out a guinee pig and spoke with a drama in his voice. "Its unstoppable. We couldnt stand looking at it for more then seconds." He fell back and facked coughed.

"What is unstopable?" Isaac shacked Saturos desparete for answeres.

"Mudshipping!!!!!" Everyone locked confused.

"Gave you ever seen a fan fiction not featuring Mudshipping? One or two sided?" Saturos locked extremly annoyed. "It is not even a shipping name for me and Mia or Jenna!"

"What about Sheba" wondered Ivan. Knowing that there was someone named Sheba even through he never passed Gondowan bridge.

"I am a member of Proxian pedofil killers and Sheba is a kid. God dammit. I killed Felix earlier then he said Sheba was hot." Saturos didnt look sorry.

"Thats good to know but what is in there that made you puke?"

"Just a pig, a monkey and a giant toad making love." Saturos puked over Garet just at the thought of it.

"What are you guys doing here anyway?" It didnt make sense.

"I did not care about a captured merchant. But Menardi sleept with his wife and promised to rescue him" Saturos started to cry. His tears was as black as his heart. (Not black at all)

The group left the crying proxian and entered the prison cell, with all djinns on set. They closed their eyes and called upon their summonings.

(Whats really inside of that room is censored, Therefore it will be a story jump until the group heads out to Saturos and Menardi again) Yes i am lazy

Saturos is stil crying but Menardi is there to tease him.

"Why do you two want to light the lighthouses?" (It is a question never asked in game)

"Becouse Lemuria will take over the world if we dont." Menardi and Saturos draw their weapons and prepared to attack.

The group battled for some time until they notcied that Hammet was stil there. Hammet spoke with his greedy voice

"Wait aint you all Heros then?"

Both sides nodded byt keept fighting. Hammet raised his voice again.

"Before you finish this fight you might wanna buy the single Battle of heros? Its from Star wars." Hammet opened his jacket and showed a huge number of star wars sound track cds.

Suddenly the fight stopped and all heros charged and tapped Hammet. Then they tied him to a chariot and drove him to Kaley. By the time they reached Kaley they were all friends, Expect Ivan/anyone.

"So are we gonna light the lighthouses now? Isaac had already lighted Mars lighthouse by a misstake so only Jupiter and Venus remained.

"No we gave the elemental stars to Jenna and Sheba they should be fine."


The two groups glad to finally came clean wnet to the Kalay cinema. Planning to watch Felix emo and The halfblood pedofil. featuring Felix and Kraden.

They was however forced to watch some annyoing commorisals. As fast as they entered a must irratating commorial showed up

Here is the Album all Imilshippers must have, Probally the greatest proof of Imilshipping ever.

Mia i light mercury lighthouse plese forgive me. From Alex himself

A image of Alex holding a red rose appered. Alex was dressed as a gentleman with hat and all that stuff.

Featuring tracks such as Plying in the rain, Breaking the visit ban, and I stalked an angel.

Behind it they heard Alex sing with a really girly voice.

Iam here plying in the rain

Not caring for those i kill just

Hoping that you could notice me

Kiss me love me im the stalker in your dreams

Also features the hit single video Something to jack of in front of

Imgages of Mia taking a shower was now shown at the big screen Alex voice sang out

I filmed this in secret

Hope you dont mind

This is some thing i watch three times everyday.

Image changed and showed Alex naked doing something censured.

Plese see me

I masterbate infront of you

Every day ( yes every day)

call the cops on me and i will light a lighthouse.

Out in stories now. a picture of the album cower showed on the screen. It was a piece were Alex and Mia naked hugged each other. Alex was censored sadly Mia wasnt

Even Garet could see that Mia was edited into the picture

Mia raised and called the Proxian stalker slayers after Alex. She then left telling that she wanted to finish him of himself.

The others barly noticed still stuck staring at the picture. Even Menardi couldnt stop looking at the binding picture " must buy album." all of them spoke like zombies.

The screen changed to the greeter sadness of god. It showed a trailer to a movie that was not to well thought over

Thusands of years before Isaac died upon the Lighthouse an ancint city Lemuria existed. The lemurian prince Parris was at least a thusand years old , still he abucted a Proxian princes making the Proxian king attack Lemuria with a thusand boats. among the Proxian warriors was the imortal Akilles fighting for glory. Guest playing in it was also the cunning Odysesues. The Lemurian prince Hector was forced to take up arms to defend his beloved city from the invading Prox army.

In the roles we see

Agatio as Akilles. A imortal warrior who still dies. Showing images of how Agatio was thrown into a tomb.

Karst as the Proxian princess what name we never cared engough to find out. She was abucted by Piers. Ending up marrying him and escaping Lemuria before it was burnt down. Showing images of Karst and Piers surronded by their twisted children.

Saturos as Odyssues. The guy who builds a giant wooden horse who is so big that it could be pushed to Lemuria making the Lemurian walls reachable. Showing image of a big wooden horse standing next to a burining Lemuria. It also took him ten years to sail home becouse he forgot his map. Then he however got him he killed himself, in grief over how fat his wife had became. Before he died he killed hundreds of sales men outside his house. Showing image of dead people sealing go Odteesus Shirts.

Conservato as Hector. The guy who Akilles kills and then drags his body all around Lemuria in a rowboat. Showing images of Agatio rowing a boat draging Conservatos body behind it.

King Hydros as the king who has to fight a war becouse his son is a pedofil. A image showing then Hydros paid the bail for Piers.

Features alot of sex and violence and no crappy i love you scenes.!!!!! from 3 years up

falling on a cinema near you.

" Jesus that film wont sell good. Glad that i paid me hundreds of millions for just being in it. " Saturos had freely paid for their cinema tickets.

Yes they had to pay for a movie in Hammets cinema. Since Hammet did not care if they saved him or not he still wanted money.

" Just who was the retard that made that trailer?" Asked ivan, since that the trailer had featured every single spoiler in the film.

" I belive his name was Lodem he owes the Tolbi movie pruductions, becouse of that he owes about half Tolbi." It was Garet who answered this time.

Every one was shocked. "How come you knew that" stammered Isaac through

" We meet Lodem in Tolbi after we won the guitar hero contest reamnber? You fainted couse nobody wanted to catched you then you stage dived." Garet keept talking

" At that time i took the oppertunity to talk to Lodem about his films and he thought he might have us in one called. The way to destroy a world." Garet didnt shut his trap their.

" And werent we supposed to meet him at Gondowan bridge? Couse we have been in Angara for days now. Its not fair to leave him at the bridge." Garet finally stopped talking then Ivan cast sleep on him.

" Its not like we said to Lodem that we would meet him this year." Isaac was a glad to not have Lodem with them he was annyoing.


At Gondowan bridge.

Clone trooper to antother trooper.

"Shoudnt we have given him something to eat or atleast forced him away?"

They were caring Lodems dead body with them.

" well we would if he hadnt keept saying that he would eat then his robots arrived"

" I dont think anyone gonna miss this guy anyway." They throwed Lodems body in the river and whispered a innocent tune. Looking like nothing had happend.

Back to the pointless story

Another anyoing commorisiall just showed up on the screen.

Did you hate everu puzel in Gs1/2? Did you hate how the bosses was so complicated?. couldnt you understand the plot?

Then GS3 Colossus is the right game for you.

Play as Navampa, Satrage or Kraden in the ultimate battle of colossus.

Same battle systems as before but updated to fit you.

No djinni.

No Psyenergys.

No special weapons.

No plot

Features nuts short shord and wooden sheilds and ofourse Hard nuts.

Buy it in your favorite game store Alharrian junk shop and......

A image of the Alfharren mayor popped up and said

Kaufen Sie das Produkt und die Unterstützung der Kriegführung

( Subtitles)

Buy it and the Alfhaarans can start a third world war.(plese dont buy it)

"wow if thats GS3 im glad i died in the first game." Menardi and Saturos both smiled but the rest locked suicidal.

A flash of light came in randomly and the wise one appered. Ivan thought the wise one was mad at them, but wasnt sure since it was hard to read his face expressions.

"Why havnt you light the lighthouses yet. I need you to do it so i got a reason to kill Alex. My wife knows how much i hate him."

"Hove do you rocks make love? " Isaac asked looking intressting

"I dont think you need to wait long until Alex dies. Mia has gone after him" Saturos remanbered then Mia beat the crap out of him on Mercury lighthouse.

"But shes a girl" The wise one believed that females were useless

"You are a girl! I have seen what you got where your cross should be. Its totally hot. " Menardi locked really excited.

The wise one started to cry and revield that she in fact had a female body.

"You reviled my rterrible secret You wont make it out of here in a while!"

"good the movie just started" Said Ivan and took his seat. He strated to move his hand towards the popcons.

He was to slow and Garet awokened from his sleep and casted pyroslam on everyone. Saturos got mad becouse Garets pyroslam was so weak and casted pyroslam himself. Now everyone was mad and they cast random psyenergies/ summons all over the cinema.

In a matter of seconds the cinema was turned into dust.

The wise one who was probly on her time of the month Transformed into a Giant stone and lifted in the air.

" Now you will pay for not listning to me. DIE!!!!!"

The giant stone fell against them from the sky. Everyone screamed that they were going to die and loocked scared. Expect Menardi who could see the wise ones secret spot, and got really thrilled.

The stone suddenly stopped on its way down. And another random flash light appered. A second one syed stone guy appered.

" who in Mars name is you?" asked the adpets

"Im the wiser one." The entire earth tremored then he spoke, The birds flew away from the trees

" I belive its time for my wife to chill down Felix failled lighting the lighthouse by the way you have to do it." Another random flash light and all flying stones were gone.

Saturos turned around to the director (me) and asked with a inpaitiant voice. " Plese dont make us re do this scene"

" No you guys are done for this now, I just need to figure whats gonna happen to Alex"

Shaman villiage.

"I think we should have brought a map before we got this lost" Jenna was tied to a totem pole."What are you gonna do to us?"

...... Her captors was very silence.

"Hold on i mind read them." Sheba was stuck in a couldron filled with water. She cast mindread on their captor.

First i am not gonna talk to them and then i am going to have a bath with them. Girls love guys who are so secret.

"Jenna this guy is just pathetic, Why did you say we should let him capture us?"

"I am not pathitic and i am much stronger then you girls. I am Moapa the guy who never talk to strangers." Moapa stretched his muscles.

"Hahaha you talked to us, you suck." Both Sheba and Jenna burst into laoughter.

Moapas face turned pink in anger, which made Jenna and Sheba lough even more. "I am going to eat you."

Moapa picked up his spear and moved it around him slowly. Jenna and Sheba kept loughing at the pink man. Finally they realised that he was serious.

Jenna burned all her ropes and approched Moapa. Moapa would have attacked her but he was hit in the fore head with Shamans rod. He fel almost dead on the sand.

All of Shamans village silently gathered up and attacked the team. In seconds Jenna beat them all somehow. Every house was on fire and they found the hover jade inside Moapas cracked skull. Now they could light Jupiter lighthouse and they would be free to go to any bar.

"Wow Jenna how did you kill them all like that? Where did all the fire come from? How come your psyenergy is still full?."

Jenna took a step closer to Sheba and glared evily. "I thought of mudshipping."

Madra Prison

Karst forced a prisoner into a dark room with one chair. she chained their prisoner blue haired prisoner to the chair, and then slowly left the room.

The door on the other side opened and several pirates entered the were led by another blue haired man.

" I belive its time to show this stalker how we do it the Pirate way." exclamied Piers and Alex began to shake.


Character questions

Isaac "Am i really that evil and dumb?"

Response: Yes you are worse then Alfharran Mayor.

Garet (Smart version) "How did Isaac get to Mars lighthouse"?

Response: Plothole

Garet (Dumb version)

"Who are you?"

Response: I am the son of gods. The light in the darkness. The drakness in the ligtht. Butter on a choclate cake. Centrion of the Horde. Protector of darkness and light. Bringer of water of life and creator of acid rain

i am the non caring auther

Ivan "Why does nobody likes me after we saved hammet?"

Response: Maybe couse you was against beating Hammet up

Mia "I got revange on Alex right?"

Response: You sure did

Mia kisses me XD

Response: my first kiss yay.

Menardi "How did you know i was a lesbian?"

Response: Mind read you in Sol sanctum you says that Jenna looks like a hot hostage.

Saturos. "Can you make up some shippings for me, including me Jenna and Mia."

Response: Okay Saturos/Jenna is called strange flame shipping and Saturos/Mia is called WTF how? shipping. You want anymore shippings?

Hammet "What is a cinema?"

Response:"Something you are to cheap to visist." a finger raised to all outlawed downloading

Jenna "Finally i am in character in a story.

Response: Yes finally

Sheba "How did we light Venus lighthouse?"

Response: its a wait for it wait for it wait for it. PLOTHOLE

Felix: "How come i always die?"

Response Maybe becouse you are suicidal.

Piers "why am i always raping or being raped in those stories?"

Responses: you really wanna know why?

Moapa is dead

Response: Cheers


Credits.

Story by ?. Is this a story?

Director Me

Pruducer Lodem (we all feel sorry for his death.)

co producer Kraden (we are all sad that he survived his first disaster story.)

Isaac played and voiced by Hsu and Ulmuh

Garet played and voiced by Random drunk (1)

Ivan played by Sheba and voiced by Saturos

Mia played by Alex and voiced by Agatio

Saturos played by himself and voiced by Menardi

Menardi played by herself and voiced by Saturos

Hammet played and voiced by Nemises (Hope you read this)

Comersial talker voiced by Puelle

Alfharran mayor played and voiced by A.... h.....

Jenna played by Devils wife and voiced by Saturos

Sheba played by Ivan and voiced by Saturos

Moapa played and voiced by Garet (RIP)

Alex played and voiced by D.... Vader

Piers played by Mia and voiced by random drunk (2)

Karst played by Eoeloe. (Un voiced since Eoele is too young to talk)

The wise one played and voiced by a small rock.

The wiser one played and voiced by a bigger rock.

Retarded Guard (1) played by random drunk (1)

Retarded guard (2) played and voiced by Garet

Clone tropper (1) played and voiced by Isaac.

Clone tropper (2) played and voiced by Ivan

Special thanks to

Camelot

Nintendo and

Dora


In loving memory of my time as a wow addict. Let hope we never see that again.