PhoenixRose92 - The voice in Jacob's head is his wolf. As for Edward, you know when you're trying to convince yourself something isn't true when it is and you just have that nagging voice in the back of your head telling you to just admit it? Well that's what it's like for Edward. It's not another being, like it is for Jacob; it's just like his subconscious telling him to face up to it :)
Chapter 3
Jasper's POV
I was a man on a mission. Edward had been avoiding everybody for days and every time I tried to get to him, he'd always manage to get away; after all he was the fastest of us all. What was he hiding from? None of us knew, as far as he knew, it was only him and Jacob that knew the truth.
So why was he avoiding me? If it didn't click before that I'd caught onto his emotions, then why would it suddenly occur to him now? After all, Edward, despite being smart never really saw the obvious things. The things that were right in front of him.
I'd searched everywhere. The house, the hunting ground, the mountains, the meadow he usually went to with Bella, even sniffing out Bella's house, but he was nowhere to be found. How could someone just disappear off the grid? What was worse, was our family didn't seem to see a difference in Edward.
He dodged us, never came on hunting trips anymore and he was never around. It was unusual, especially since unless he was hanging out with Bella, in school or hunting, Edward never left the house. Sometimes it was hard to get rid of him, especially if you wanted to have sex, you'd know Edward would be listening.
Emmett was the worst. As you can imagine, he was the biggest sex crazed lunatic I'd ever met. It didn't help he kept bringing human males home. Yes, that's right. A gay Emmett, who saw that coming? Sure enough it wasn't us.
Ever since moving back to this town a few years back Emmett started changing. He no longer depended on Rosalie for everything, no longer hung on her every word, just because she'd saved him from death. Eventually it led to him not seeing her as a lover anymore and he started finding himself interested in other men. The whole thing had blown up last year when Rosalie caught him in the boy's locker room with one of the football players in the shower.
Needless to say Emmett wasn't able to walk for a month after she was finished with him and we hadn't heard from her since. It was sad actually. I actually missed Rose, despite the fact she was scary most of the time, she always added a bit of humour and she wasn't a terrible person to be around…all the time.
Alice no longer had a shopping companion, which made her drag me along on all her trips now. I mean, I loved Alice with all my heart, but walking round the mall, holding all her bags and having to tell her she looked amazing in everything, got annoying. Especially after the 200th dress.
Anyway, in my search for Edward something suddenly occurred to me. If he wasn't anywhere to be found, where was the one place, even if it was the tiniest possibility ever, could he have gone?
LaPush.
Edward's POV
In the past few days I'd gone crazy. Crazy with need and want. Want for a wolf. What the fuck was happening to me? I'd never, never in my life wanted anybody so much. I got hard just thinking about Jacob, it didn't even have to be a sexual thought. With Bella I had to think really hard before anything happened. Probably because I could never imagine sleeping with Bella. She was too fragile, breakable. And even turning her wouldn't do it for me anymore.
But Jacob. Jacob. Now he was far from breakable. He was strong, after all he was the Beta and he hadn't been a wolf that long either, so that had to mean something right?
Jacob, now I could see sleeping with him. He was tall, strong and most of all a wolf, he'd have animal instincts which would make the overall experience much more pleasurable.
God! Why was I thinking like this? It's mad! It's crazy! I'm completely delusional if I even think this could work! Why do I think this could work? All the people who we'd hurt. All the people that'd hate us for something we couldn't control. For something that was natural and meant to be.
I sighed as I stood at the border of LaPush and Forks. If I took another step I'd risk being eaten by the pack, but on the other hand I was close to him. I could possibly catch him on his own, maybe we could talk. Yeah, talking would be good. Talking's acceptable right?
Who am I kidding? The pack would find me and kill me and even though I highly doubt he feels anything for me, his wolf would and it'd destroy him for his imprint to die. I didn't want to do that to him.
I sighed, it was best to let things play out. After all I didn't need anyone thinking they had the upper hand.
Just as I was about to turn away a grey wolf appeared and began growling at me. He lifted up his paw and flicked it, indicating me to move back more into my own land.
I nodded and moved back, going to walk away until Jasper appeared in front of me. His face was serious and he was looking at me with an angry look in his eyes.
"Are you crazy?" He hissed. "You're so damn close to that border line, that wolf could've tore you apart! You're lucky he isn't as savage as the Alpha!"
I gulped, realising he was right. If it was Sam who'd seen me, he would've killed me for just being on the edge of the line, and he'd claim it was because I could've done anything being so close, I must've had an agenda.
He grasped my arm and digging his fingers in my skin, dragged me further into the woods. He let go when we were far enough away, he began walking a few steps and running his hands through his hair.
"What were you going to do Edward? Run up to him and hope he says he loves you back?" He turned round to face me, growling slightly.
My mouth fell open in shock, was he saying what I think he was saying?
"Yes Edward. That's right. I know. How could you think I wouldn't know? I felt your emotions from the first moment he imprinted! I want to know what you're going to do about this; because it's obvious you're feeling something for him otherwise you wouldn't have almost tried to kill yourself!"
I sighed, rubbing a hand over my face. "I don't fucking know what to do okay? The thought of being with me repulses and turns me on at the same time! How is this right? How can this even be possible? Do you think I wanted this? To feel this way? I'd prefer to be staked a hundred times over than feel anything for that mutt! How do you think I feel?" I growled at him, getting angrier as my speech went on.
Jasper's face softened, probably realising what I was going through. He walked over to me and pulled me into a hug. It was strange, considering Jasper was usually so void of emotion. How ironic. Yet for brief moments of time he'd show a little humanity, where I'd once begun to think he'd lost it completely.
"Maybe you just need to avoid him as much as possible, you know, save any of the hurt and longing you'd feel in his presence," Jasper suggested, pulling back from the hug and smiling slightly at me.
I nodded, smiling back. "Yeah. Being away from him will make it easier."
If only I knew how truly hard that would actually be.
Jacob's POV
Nobody knew. Not the pack. Not my dad. Nobody.
I felt alone. Scared. What the hell was I supposed to do? All these feelings were bubbling up inside of me and I had no escape. I thought about him all the time, every second of every day and I hated it. I hated him.
He's a leech. A dirty, blood-sucking leech. He kills people, so why do I even like him? Why do I even care?
I sighed as I paced back and fourth in my room, wondering what to do. If he didn't live in a house full of vampires, I'd probably go to see him, talk. Something. Anything to stop my heart from aching.
You should tell him how you feel, my wolf suggested, sticking the knife in deeper.
I growled lowly. Shut the fuck up, it's you who's got us into this mess.
You want him just as much as I do, don't deny it, he snapped.
I laughed. Ha! Yeah sure, all these feelings are because of you. He repulses and disgusts me!
I felt my wolf growling loudly inside me, but I pushed him down. I didn't need to listen to him anymore. I was already going out of my mind with questions, questions that nobody could answer. Should I reject him? Could I even do it when it boiled down to it? I guess I'll just have to see the next time I see him.
Sorry if it seems like it's going slow, but I really don't want them giving in so quickly, like in my previous story. Just bear with me! :)
If any of you like The Vampire Diaries and if you like Caroline/Klaus stories, then check out my new story which I updated a few days ago! :)
