Author's Notes:

A huge thank you to DaLadyOfSouls for being my amazing beta, your help is very much appreciated.

RPG; rocket propelled grenade.

Disclaimer:Transformers is owned by Hasbro and it's related companies. No profit is being made off this story it's just for fun. I only own my plot and my oc's. This is a work of fiction, and any similarities to persons/organisations living or dead is unintentional.

Warnings: May trigger some PTSD sufferers. Contains 'Survivors Guilt' and Grief situations

~000~

Airport

Jack stared at his brother. He hadn't changed much from when he'd last seen him, still towering over him by six inches.

The only difference were his bloodshot eyes, and shadow of stubble on his jaw. The poor guy probably hadn't slept in weeks.

There was a long scar down his face, running from cheek to chin, probably only a week old.

"Hate to ruin the moment, but who are you?" Miko poked Jesse's buff chest for emphasis.

He looked down on her, an amused smirk playing at his lips.

"I could ask you the same. I am Second Lieutenant Jesse Darby, Jack's older brother".

"Wait… Jack, you have a brother?!" Raf and Miko both gaped, looking back and forth between the two older boys.

They looked similar, blue eyes and dark hair though Jesse was much more buff, his skin tanned and scarred.

"You never told them?" Jesse asked, raising an eyebrow.

Jack smiled sheepishly, "It didn't seem relevant".

They laughed, only seconds later both young men were on the edge of tears.

"Never leave us again, I don't think Mom and I could take it" Jack hugged Jesse again, albeit much gentler.

Jesse wrapped his arms around his sobbing brother. People in the terminal were giving him odd looks but he didn't care.

"I can't make promises, but I won't be going anywhere any time soon" he whispered, heavy tears falling into Jack's dark hair.

Though only a few minutes, their embrace seemed to last for hours. As if all that existed were the two brothers. It was the first sense of peace Jesse had felt in years.

Raf fidgeted with his fingers, glancing out the large airport window into the parking lot, "Not to spoil your moment Jesse, Sir, but we should probably be going".

The lieutenant looked up, seeming to just notice the two kids.

"Yes, of course… What were your names again?" Jesse asked.

Jack looked up, then back to his friends.

"Jesse, these are my friends, Miko," He waved his hand to the bouncing black and pink haired girl, "... and Rafael, but we mostly call him Raf".

"It's a pleasure to meet you both," The lieutenant said, shaking their hands.

"Jack, how exactly did you get here? please tell me you weren't dropped off," he asked with a panicky laugh.

Jesse's younger brother only smiled rather thoughtfully, looking past the many faces of the crowded terminal and out the window to a large green Lamborghini LM002 military truck. He was going to have some explain to do, and lots of it.

"No, I drove here myself. I'm sixteen now, got my drivers a few months back" Jack stated matter-of-factly, though there was a sadden undertone he hoped went unnoticed.

"Sixteen? Jeeze, I've missed so much…" Jesse's voice was borderline sorrowful.

"Your gonna have to catch me up on the way home. If I'm not asleep by then," the young lieutenant announced, hoisting his camo green duffle bag over his shoulder, and trying to hide a wince and groan at the sudden movement.

-000-

They had made it out of the terminal, hardly a full sentence spoken. Everyone, Miko included, was lost in their own thoughts. That is until they reached the Airport's souvenir shopping strip.

"Oh!" cried Jesse, stopping in the middle of the walkway, much to his passerby's discontent, "I nearly forgot, there's something I need to get before we leave."

The soldier started making a beeline for one of the Airport's shops.

The three kids shared stunned glances, then hastily chased after the limping young soldier.

"Jesse wait for us!" cried Jack, "What are you doing?"

"Are you buying Mrs. Darby a gift?" It was Raf who spoke, the most he'd said to a stranger in sometime.

Jesse, who was looking over a small pack of jelly beans, glanced down on the boy and grinned boyishly.

"No sir, these are for me. It's a… quirk of mine. Kinda like some people and chocolate. Jelly beans are my comfort food," Jesse said nonchalantly, taking a large bag of gourmet Jelly Belly's and handing them to the clerk, a pretty young brunette woman who seemed to be in her early twenties.

She glanced at him, taking in the sight of his uniform appreciatively. Blushing, she looked to the kids he was with and she smiled.

"Have a lovely afternoon Sir, thank you for your service" She said with a grin, handing the bag to Raf, who stared blankly at them a moment, and tossed them to Jack.

-000-

After Jack passed the Jelly Belly's to their true owner, they made it to the parking lot without any further disruptions.

Jesse, despite his limp, was leading the group out of the building by a fox's length. Jack took this as a moment to explain the plan to Miko and Raf.

"We cannot let him find out yet, understood? That means we each have to pretend Bulkhead is a normal car, okay?"

Rafael nodded with a grim set determination in his eye, Miko snorted with contempt.

"Fine, but who's gonna tell Bulk?" she asked, gesturing to the burly green vehicle quietly idling in the lot.

Raf smiled, "I'll do it!" and with that, he jogged ahead and leaned against the army green alt mode to whisper to the disguised Autobot.

To Jesse, he looked like every other kid, wanting to be the first one there, and talking to themselves. Either singing or scheming, you never know. But, Raf was talking to the robot in disguise, filling him in on their 'important package'.

The other two jogged up behind Jesse, and Jack jerked a thumb to Bulkhead.

"The big green one is our ride home, a friend lent it to me for the time being," Jesse nodded quietly, and looked to where his little brother was pointing, and stopped short in shock. It was an army green military truck…

Jesse was frozen, his body seized up and sweating drops of ice. Nearly every memory involving this style of military vehicle flooded his mind in a matter of seconds.

~000~

FLASHBACK: The Darby household, five years ago.

Jesse walked down the hallway, a heavy canvas duffle bag swinging from his shoulder. The sound of his footsteps were heavy laden, a slow march towards the front door.

The young man took a deep breath as he trudged past his brother's room, the door was open just a crack. He could see his younger brother sitting on his bed, his head in his knees, arms wrapped tightly around his legs.

It hurt Jesse to see Jack like that. But, not one for long painful goodbyes, Jesse sighed and kept walking.

His mother stood in front of the doorway, hand over her mouth, tears streaming down her cheeks. She looked oldest son in the eyes, her little boy in a uniform.

She trembled, and Jesse approached her slowly, setting the bag down next to his polished boots.

"Ma, it's gonna be okay. Please don't cry" Jesse pleaded.

Mrs. Darby opened her mouth, trying to force words past her lips, but all that came out was a strangled cry.

She flung herself into Jesse's embrace, managing to breath a trembling,"I swear Jesse if you don't come back to me…"

Jesse laughed shakily as tears threatened to run down his cheeks, "Don't worry about a thing Ma. Pa would've done the same".

"Your father was so proud of you. Just know you don't have to prove yourself. You don't have to go, I can work another job. You can find one close to home" She pleaded desperately, clinging to the buff eighteen year old.

"No, I couldn't live with myself, knowing that I made you work like that, when I could've done something to help. I'll make more money this way, I'll be sending my paychecks home," Jesse reassured his mother, "If nothing else, it'll help keep Jack in school. It's all gonna be okay Ma. I love you"

"l love you too Jesse", June murmured through her silent tears.

The young man went to pick up his bag, and waved goodbye to his mother. She sobbed and forced a smile, waving to her oldest son.

Jesse stepped onto the deck, and made his way down the stairs, outside, an army green Humvee waited for him.

Just as he stepped into the gravel driveway, Jack tore out the door.

"Jesse! Wait for me!" The young military recruit stopped, turning around in time for the eleven year old kid to launch himself into his brother's arms.

Jack cried into Jesse's elbow, then lifted his head to stare into the young mans blue eyes.

"Don't go, please. I'll do anything you want, clean your room, wash your car, I'll even do your laundry. I'll do anything so long as you don't go" Jack's deep blue eyes were reddened and pleading.

Jesse kneeled, and held their gaze, trying not to let his own tears show, "Don't cry kiddo, I'll be back before you know it. But while I'm gone, you gotta take care of Ma. Think you could do that for me?"

Little Jack nodded, and sniffled. Wiping his face with his sleeves.

"Promise you'll come back" Jack said quietly.

Jesse looked away, knowing full well he shouldn't make promises he could keep. But those sad eyes…

"I promise Jackson. I love you Lil 'Dude" Jesse murmured.

"I love you to Big Dude", Jack's tear tracks obvious.

With a final hug, Jesse stood straight, waved one last time, and walked over to the Humvee, tossing his bag across his back and hopping in the back seat. The engine started up with a rumble, then pulled out of the driveway, receding into the horizon in a cloud of dust…

FLASHBACK: Sadr City, 7 months ago

Jesse sat crouched behind a Humvee, enemy fire tearing through the metal with relative ease. Carefully, he sat up, peering over the hood of the beat up vehicle. He could see flipped trucks, scattered debris, and his men taking cover behind rocks, yet he couldn't figure out where the fire was coming from.

"RPG! Get down!" someone near him screamed. Everyone ducked and braced themselves as the grenade exploded several meters to Jesse's left.

Ears ringing, Jesse turned to see two men laying sprawled in the open. Blood was starting to pool around their limp bodies. Shrapnel had cut up their torsos, head and arms, but they seemed to be alive.

'Eight minutes in and we already have casualties' the lieutenant thought, preparing himself to get out in the open.

"Man down, man down! We need a corpsman over here" Jesse yelled at the top of his lungs.

The lieutenant crawled over the the downed marines, grabbing one under the arms and dragging him behind the flipped Humvee…

FLASHBACK: Outer Baghdad, 3 weeks ago

"If I had a million dollars, if I had a million dollars…" Bossley was singing his heart out, swinging in his gunner's seat.

He'd been singing for a good three minutes. And though it was annoying, it did lighten the mood some. Edwards had started singing back up, Doolen sang harmony. Jesse was tapping out the drums. By the second verse it was starting to sound pretty good.

"If I had a million dollars, I'd buy your loovvee"

Then Edwards got quiet, and the vehicle slowed down. It was one of those moments that couldn't be explained. One could feel portent's weight press down on them, a warning that they should have payed closer attention to.

Edwards looked over to Jesse, unholy terror in his eyes. There was a second of utter stillness, then the Humvee was thrown into the air…

~000~

Airport Carpark

"Jesse? Hey, are you okay?" Jack's voice pierced through Jesse's memories, jolting him back into reality.

Jesse was standing as if in a trance, his skin pale, breathing quick and uneven. His eyes were wild and haunted, his hands shaking. The sound of Jack's voice jostled the marine into reality, and slowly, the man's breaths calmed, the colour returning to his face and arms.

"Y-yeah, I'm f-fine" Jesse stammered.

Jack nodded deliberately, and helped his trebling brother towards Bulkhead.

Setting the duffle bag on the floor in the back, Jesse sat in the passenger seat. He tried desperately to hide his unsteady hands.

Miko and Raf occupied the other back seats, and Jack took the steering wheel. The rolled out of the parking lot with ease, Jesse was beaming with pride for his sibling. It was hard to believe how much he'd missed.

As they drove down the Nevada roads, Jesse started to relax, the soft rumbling of the engine lulling him to sleep.