A/N: As always, thanks to my fuckawesome beta chiisai-kitty.
Oh, and the amazingly talented Mavrosal made this gorgeous banner for this fic. I posted it here:
http:/nutellah00r . tumblr . com/post/1081860540/monsters-have-feelings-too-banner-by-mavrosal
First, Just a little review of where we left things...
Eric turned away, only to be faced with Pam standing there with her jaw scraping the floor. "What? Yvetta left it lying around one day. I was bored."
Pam went into her trademark 'Yeah Right' pose, placing a hand on her hip and rolling her eyes.
"It's got everything you'd ever want," Eric continued. "Gory action, evil monsters, entertaining dialogue, hot sex." He turned around and gave Sam an appreciative look that made Sam feel dirty and hot and bothered all at the same time. "Even hot demon sex. Bonus."
Eric chuckled to himself, but sobered up in the next instant. Turning away from his shell-shocked audience, he suddenly realized he had just tried to convince a vampire—his child—of the merits of a paranormal smut novel. "Oh, fuck."
Pam's ringing laughter broke the silence.
"What the hell?" Eric and Sam asked in unison, looking at each other with confusion before turning back to Pam.
"Oh god! I'm sorry," Pam choked out, holding up a finger to silently beg them to hold on as she tried to get a hold of herself. She lost the fight, doubling over and clutching her stomach.
"Oh god, oh god," she whispered, wiping the bloody tears from her eyes. "So that was you brother writing you love notes, Sammy?" she cracked up again.
"I'm glad I could amuse you," Sam muttered. "And for the last time, it's Sam. Only my br—"
"Oh, I know, I know!" Pam interrupted. "Only your dear brother gets to call you that."
She burst into laughter once again at that.
Eric zoomed over to her, stopping mere inches from her face. "Enough. Don't make me smack you, Pamela"
Pam settled down.
"Seriously? Out of all that, the thing that really got you off was that? Maybe you should really read the books; the brothers' relationship is quite heavy with homoerotic undertones, if you enjoy that sort of thing."
"Yeah. Seriously, Pamela." Sam mimicked.
"It's Pam," she hissed, turning a deathly glare on Sam. Reining herself in, she added, "Only my master may call me by my full human name."
Sam hiccupped a giggle, then another, before he caved and succumbed to the most adorable gigglefit. When it finally passed, he met Pam's icy glare and shrugged in response. "What? I guess we both have pet names we're overly sensitive about."
Pam narrowed her eyes at him. "So it would seem."
"Okay, okay. That will do, children." Eric chided. Turning around, he cocked his head to the right as he studied Sam's face. "Fine, Winchester. I'll believe you. So you are the real Sam Winchester, and hunters are real. However, the question still remains: what shall we do about it?"
"Eric," Pam piped up from his side. "Tell me you are not seriously—"
Eric silenced Pam with a warning glare before returning his full attention back to Sam.
"You should untie me," Sam said through clenched teeth. "So I can help you kill this maenad thing."
"Should I, now?" The smirk was hard to miss in Eric's voice. "And tell me, Sam, do you have much experience killing these 'Maenad things'?"
"'Bout as much as you. Or her." Sam spat out, motioning to Pam with a flip of his fluffy hair. At Eric's dubious look, he quickly added, "But … I'm sure we can find someone who has."
"I see." Eric replied. "And by 'we', would you be referring to your other half, Dean?"
Sam simply glared in response, pursing his lips.
"I will take that as a yes." Eric paused, considering. "But that still doesn't solve our problem."
Eric ran a long, cool finger over Sam's stubbly skin, tracing his jaw line excruciatingly slow until his hand came to rest at the cleft of his chin. Cupping it, he tilted Sam's face up, forcing him to meet his eyes.
"And how do I know that you won't try to kill us at your first opportunity, hunter?"
Sam jerked his face out of Eric's grasp. "You have my word."
"Oh, well since you have his word," Pam sneered, rolling her eyes for added emphasis.
She was rewarded with an icy glare from both men.
"It is not that I doubt you are a man of your word," Eric mused, looking Sam up and down. "But I'm afraid you are going to have to do better than that. "
Sam looked at Eric imploringly.
"And don't give me those puppy dog eyes, either. I do not have an affinity towards anything remotely canine. Well, unless it's fangs, of course." Eric grinned, running his tongue most seductively over said fangs.
Sam lowered his head and let out a heavy sigh. "But I don't know what else I can give you," he mumbled.
"Oh, don't you worry your pretty little head about that," Eric purred, his smile growing downright wicked. "I know just the thing."
He waited until Sam lifted his head once again before adding, "You will simply have to give me some … collateral."
"Collateral? Uh … I don't see what I could possibly have that a vampire would consider valuable enough to be 'collateral'."
Eric's grin turned feral, as he let his hand graze along the curve of Sam's collarbones lazily. "Now, now, Sammy boy. You really shouldn't sell yourself short like that. It is unbecoming." He purred. "Besides, I don't have to consider it valuable—only you two do."
"O-kaaay. Did you, uh… have something in mind?"
"Indeed. You may leave your precious car with me. '67 Impala, if I am not mistaken?"
"The … what?" Sam sputtered. "Yeah right. Good luck with that."
"I must admit, I am more of a Corvette man myself," Eric mused, stroking his chin as if he was pondering one of the world's greatest mysteries. "But, I have always wanted to try out a classic Impala. I hear they are quite … spacious."
Sam rolled his eyes. "Uh … yeah. Okay. Why on earth would my brother ever even consider leaving the Impala with you?"
Eric gave Sam a fangy grin that chilled him straight through to the bone. "Because he loves his brother. Does he not?"
Before Sam could manage to come up with any type of coherent response, Eric had motioned for Pam to come over and had her call Dean. As Pam put the phone up to Sam's face, Eric leaned down to Sam's free ear and whispered, "We are not going to try anything cute, now are we?"
Sam locked gazes with the vampire. "And how do I know you're not just gonna kill the both of us as soon as my brother gets here?" he hissed through gritted teeth, his well-used jaw clenching muscles working overtime.
Eric gave him the sweetest choir-boy smile and winked. "Because you have my word."
"Sammy? That you?" Dean's panicked voice snapped Sam right out of his staring contest with his captor.
"Y-yeah, Dean," Sam stammered. "'s me."
"Thank fuck! You okay?"
"Oh, yeah. Yeah, I'm fine."
"Dude. What the hell? I thought we agreed you weren't ever gonna do that again. Do you know how many messages I left you? Where the hell are you even?"
"Dean—"
"And what the fuck is going on? You better have a damn good explanation, man, or so help me god, I'll—"
"Dean! D'you want any actual answers or what?"
"Fine. Go 'head."
"Okay. I'm at this bar in Shreveport. It's called Fangtasia."
"Fangtasia? What is that, some sorta weird-ass sex bondage club for those vampire groupie types? Dude. I'm happy you're finally going out and enjoyin' yourself, but if you're gonna go the freaky-dikky kinky demon route, can you please spare me the gory details?"
"A sex bondage… what? No. Well, I dunno. But I'm here on a job."
Dean sighed. "Please … please just tell me you're not all tied up. In some sex dungeon."
"Well …."
"Oh, hell."
"Well it's not like it's by my own choice, Dean. God!"
"Yeah, it never is, is it?"
"Dean! Just listen, 'kay?" When Dean remained silent on the other side, Sam went on, "I need you to come meet me here. For the job, you know?"
"What kinda job?" Dean shot back suspiciously.
"Come on, man. I really can't get into it all right now. Just get here and I'll explain everything to you then."
"Hang on. You can't even tell me a little about this place?" Sam clenched his jaw in frustration. "Is it… is it a funky kinda place?"
Sam gave Eric a weak half-smile as he noticed the vampire's eyes narrow suspiciously. "Uh… no. I mean, I thought so at first, but … I was wrong. I think." Sam gave Eric a significant don't-you-dare-prove-me-wrong look as he waited for his brother's response.
"O-kaaay. Uh… guess I'll be headin' over now then."
Sam barely got a chance to say goodbye before Pam slammed the phone shut and slipped it into the front pocket of her jeans, letting her hand linger there much longer than was necessary.
"Call me when the Winchester boy gets here," Eric called over his shoulder as he walked towards the stairs. "Oh, and you may as well untie this one."
"What?" Pam spun around. "But …."
Eric shot her a warning glance. "Come now. We would not want to give our soon-to-arrive guest the wrong impression, now would we?"
Pam hung her head down in deference and complied with her orders. But that didn't stop her from sulking as she did so. Her hissed words were just loud enough for Sam to make out, even though he half wished he hadn't. "Fuck a goddamn zombie. I never get to have any fun anymore."
