A/n: 9-07: For history, we have to do a presentation about time. I was gonna do We Didn't Start the Fire by Billy Joel, but one night I was lying in bed, singing Wicked songs to myself. (Tehe.) Anyway, I was almost asleep when it hit me- For Good! It's a song about friendship, which is about the past... I know it's a stretch, but my teacher said it was ok, so... wish me luck!!

3-08: Got a hundred on it!! (Though that was a long time ago, sorry.)

Disclaimer: I don't own Wicked. Bah.

Chapter 3

Galinda: Dearest Darlingest Momsie and Popsicle...

Elphaba: (sounding a lot like Galinda) I like Popsicles!

Authoress and Galinda: O.O (that's a face with big eyes, if you can't tell)

Elphaba: Ummm... No I don't?

Authoress and Galinda: (breathes sigh of relief)

Elphaba: (turns away and eats cherry Popsicle) I didn't mean that... I'll always love Popsicles... (sees grape Popsicle) MINE!!! (dives after it)

Authoress: Umm...

Elphaba: I'm back! (ahem) My dear-

Authoress: (cough-STEP-cough)

Elphaba: Grape Popsicle... I mean, Father...

Galinda and Elphaba: We've been stuck living with our mortal enemies here at Shiz!!

Elphaba: Yes, Frex, it's a "z", not a "t".

(Again, think about it...)

Elphaba: But, of course, I'll care for Nessa, for fear that if I don't, I'd incur your ever-lasting wrath.

Galinda: But, of course, I'll gossip about her at every chance I get.

Elphaba and Galinda: Cause I know that's how you'd want me to respond! There's been some confusion, for you see my roommate is...

Elphaba: A prep!! NOOOOOO!!!

Galinda: Green... and UNPOPULAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HOW AM I GONNA LIVE????!!!! I think I need to have a belief right about now...

(Everyone looks at Frex, who is sleeping in a chair offstage)

Galinda: I said, I think I NEED to have a BELIEF right about now...

Frex: (still sleeping)

Galinda: Oh, screw it.

(Galinda and Elphaba throw down letters)

Elphaba: (stomping on letter) TAKE THAT FREX!!! AND THAT!! AND THAT!!! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! HAHA!!! HA!!

Galinda: What is this feeling, so sudden and new?

Elphaba: I felt the moment I laid eyes on your hideous dyed-blonde hair.

Galinda: My pulse is rushing...

Elphaba: My head is reeling...

Galinda: Why? Are you fishing?

Elphaba: What??

Galinda: You said your head was reeling. You know, like you reel in fish?

Elphaba and Authoress: ...

Authoress: It's a saying, you idiot.

Galinda: Oh! (ahem) My face is flushing!

Elphaba and Galinda: Oh, what is this feeling? Fervid as a flame...

Elphaba: (to Galinda) Do you even know what "Fervid" means?

Galinda: Yeah!! It means... ummm... well, Fer... fer... Fur!! And then, vid... as in "video"! Fervid means a video about fur! (pause) A video about fur as a flame... Oh I get it!

Authoress, Elphaba, anyone who ever reads this: (confused)

Galinda: That's confusified.

Authoress, Elphaba, anyone who ever reads this: (confusified)

Galinda: (doing hair flip) I guess I'm just too smart... (sees bubble) OOH!! BUBBLE!! MINE!!! (runs after bubble)

Authoress: Deja Vu...

(Galinda walks back, crying)

Galinda: The bubble popped!

Elphaba: (ignoring her tears) Do you mean "fur" or "Fur"?

Galinda: There's a difference?

Elphaba: Yes! One's from animals, and the other from Animals.

Galinda: Oh, animals and Animals.

Elphaba: (breathing sigh of relief) Yes, animals and Animals.

Galinda: Yeah, Animal fur is more expensive, but I like it better cuz it's softer and all.

(Elphaba tries to beat up Galinda)

Galinda: Gak!

(Authoress pulls them apart. Hands Galinda a bubble blower and Elphaba a Popsicle)

Galinda and Elphaba: Yay!!

(Ten minutes later)

Authoress: Start the song already!!

Elphaba and Galinda: (ahem) Uh.. what is this feeling? blah blah blah...Fervid... uh... Does it have a name? Yeah-ESSSSSSSSS!!

Gelphie Shippers: (crossing fingers) Love. Love. Love.

Galinda and Elphaba: Loa-

Gelphie Shippers: YES!!! THANK YOU KUMBRIC WITCH!!

Frex: (seeing massive amounts of Gelphie Shippers) I'm not even gonna try.

Elphaba and Galinda: -thing, unadulterated loathing.

Gelphie Shippers: Goshdarnit!!

Galinda: For your ugly green face.

Elphaba: Your ridiculously high voice capacities.

Galinda: Your potato sacks, I mean, clothing.

Galinda and Elphaba: Let's just say, I loathe it all! Ev'ry-

Authoress: Aww, that reminds me of a Christmas carol...

Frex: (Chasing Authoress around) It's the Unnamed God!!!!!!!!!!!

40 Years Later:

Authoress: Finally, I'm back!

Elphaba: What took you so long?

Authoress: Your dad has a lot of energy in him.

Frex: (using a walker really slowly, sounding like Homer's dad from the Simpson's) I'll get you...

Elphaba: Yeah, well, no one writes Wicked fanfics anymore.

Authoress: WHAT??!! WHAT KIND OF PLACE IS THIS??!! (pulls out Time-Turner and starts to flip it) One... two... three...

Twenty Minutes Later:

Authoress: Fifty six...fifty seven...fifty eight...

3 Hours Later:

Authoress: Three hundred eighty four... three hundred eighty five... three hundred eighty six...

After An Undetermined Amount Of Time Because I Really, Really Don't Feel Like Doing the Exact Math, But It's Safe To Say That It Was A Long Time:

Authoress: Now that that fiasco's over...

(Shizians enter)

Shizians: Dear Galinda you are just too good! How do you stand it,-

Authoress: Yet again, just because she's green doesn't mean she's an"it". She's "her". Duh-ness.

Shizians: I don't think I could!

Authoress: Umm... what's with the random italicized parts??

Shizians: She's a terror, she's a tartar sauce-

Elphaba: I'm tarter sauce??!!

Shizians: Yeah, that's what we said... (ahem) We don't mean to show a bias, but Galinda you're a martyr!!!

Frex: Really? A martyr?

Shizians: Yep.

Authoress: You know, a martyr is a person who dies for his and/or her faith.

Shizians: OK, you try and find something that rhymes with Tartar!

Authoress: Barter. Garter. Smarter.

Shizians: Hmm... She's a terror, she's a tartar, we don't mean to show a bias, but Galinda you're much smarter... Hey, it could work.

Authoress: Except for the fact that it's not true!!!

Galinda: Well, (yet again hitting a ridiculously high note) these things are sent to try us!

(Breaks glass Elphaba is holding)

Elphaba: (Holding sharp glass, grinning) Oh Ga-lin-da... (Chases Galinda around room)

Shizians: Poor Galinda-

Galinda: Ahh!!!!

Shizians: (Just standing there,singing) forced to reside-

Galinda: (still being chased by evil maniacal Elphaba) Help me!! Help meeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Elphaba: Mwahahaha!! (evil witch crackle)

Galinda: (Stops running)

Shizians: (stop singing)

Authoress: What was that??!!

Elphaba: Uh, my evil witch crackle.

Authoress: You know you're not evil, right?

Elphaba: We all have to let it out sometime. Why not on my mortal enemy?

English Teacher: That's the spirit!

Shizians: Can we PLEASE finish this song? (ahem) With someone so disgustisified, we just want to tell you, we're all on your side!! We share your loathing-

Galinda and Elphaba: What is this feeling, so sudden and new?

Shizians: Unadulterated loathing.

Elphaba: I felt the moment I laid eyes on you.

Shizians: For her face, her voice, her clothing.

Galinda: (totally lost) Uhh...ummm... La la, la la, you'll be popular...

Elphaba: My pulse is rushing-

Shizians: Let's just say-

Galinda: Just not quite as popular-

Elphaba: My head is reeling-

Shizians: We loathe it all!

Elphaba: Oh what is this feeling?

Galinda: As MEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Shizians: Ev'ry little trait however small,

Elphaba: Does it have a name?

Shizians: Makes my flesh begin to crawl.

Shizians and Elphaba: Yea-ESSS!

(Lots of people appear randomly)

Authoress: Umm... definitely didn't write that...

Snape: (To Harry's dad) Loathing! There's a strange exhilaration...

Harry: (to Malfoy) In such total detestation!

Voldemort: (To Harry) It's so pure, so strong!

Authoress: Why are you here?

Elphaba: (really mad) MY FANFIC!! MINE!!

Authoress: Technically mine.

Elphaba: Whatever.

Frex: (to Elphaba) And though I do admit it came on fast...

English Teacher: (to Authoress) Still I do believe that it will last!

Authoress: What??!! Are you kidding me??!! SAVE ME!!!!!!

English Teacher: (to Authoress) And I will be loathing for-forever...

Ron: (to Krum) Loathing, truly deeply...

All the people who were singing above: LOATHING YOU!!!

Elphaba and Galinda: My whole life long!

Authoress: Do do do do-do-do do-do...

Elphaba: Boo!

Galinda: Ahhh!! Oh my Oz!! (starts crying) Why me, why'd she have to scare me?

Elphaba: (feeling bad)

Authoress: No! You hate her, remember?

Elphaba: Oh yeah! (Chases Galinda with broken glass again)

Authoress: Oh my... (sees Popsicle) Mmm... Cherry, my favorite! (takes Popsicle)

Elphaba: YOU STOLE MY POPSICLE!! NOW DIE!! (Beats up Authoress)

Authoress: Gak!


A/n: Yeah, I know that was bad. I'm sorry! But I can't wait til Dancing Through Life, I have sooo much stuff planned for that chapter! And I'm sorry it took so long- I had to read my summer reading in the one week we got back from vacation. (It is not fun to read the Aeneid and the Odyssey in one week. Fortunately, I had already read the Iliad.) AND I had a six hour soccer camp everyday, so... it was tough. I won't be updating as often now, b/c it's soccer season and school had started and I get home around 6:30 on a good day. Tehe.

Speaking of school, guess who left? Remember Evil Teacher of Doom from my profile? Yep, she left!

I couldn't be happier, because happy is what happens when all your dreams come true.

Well, isn't it?

3/08- Soccer's been over, the Odyssey wasn't that bad, and it's track season now. McKent forever!

-Yorkie Lover