BONUS CHAPTER

Things I Am Not Allowed To Do By Shetland Islands

1. I am not allowed to drop out of a tree onto Denmark and steal his hat.

2. Even if I can beat him. Because he doesn't like it and Scottie will be cross.

3. I am not allowed to drink too much.

4. Because Scottie doesn't like getting a bill for the rebuilding of bars.

5. I am not allowed to steal Prussia's boxers.

6. Even if he has harassed Orkney, because...See number Two.

7. I am not allowed to kick America.

8. Because he kicks back and England hates having to stop fights.

9. I am not allowed to set fire to Hong Kong's wardrobe if he annoys me.

10. He keeps his fireworks there, surprisingly.

11. I am not allowed to kick Francis.

12. He will then tell on me.

13. Scottie would be cross.

14. I am not allowed to steal pocky from Japan.

15. He will start lacing it with sedatives.

16. Which isn't fun.

17. I am not allowed to ply England with drink.

18. See 4.

19. I am not allowed to make Orkney go to lessons in my place.

20. Because he can't do a convincing impression of me and will tell.

21. I am not allowed to buy a flamethrower again.

22. Because Wales will set his dragon on me.

23. I am not allowed to climb up the guttering any more.

24. Because it scares everyone except me.

25. And I should care about that. I really should.

26. I am not allowed to tie Francis to a tree and leave him.

27. See 13.

28. I am not allowed to steal paperwork and set fire to it.

29. My brothers will all try to kick my ass when they get into trouble with their bosses.

30. I am not to hack the intercom system.

31. Francis was the only one happy when I did so.

32. Needless to say, England wasn't. At all.

33. I am not allowed to slide down the banisters.

34. I am not allowed to throw ice cubes at Scottie.

35. See 13.

36. I am not allowed to pour glitter into Germany's nostrils while he's asleep and call it a German Sparkle Party when he sneezes it out.

37. Because he'll really not take it well.

38. I am not allowed to hit South Italy's arm if he annoys me.

39. Spain will be angry. Plus, South Italy will hit me back.

40. I am not allowed to kidnap Berlitz again.

41. Germany will hunt me down.

42. Even if all I was doing was cuddling him and he was happy.

43. I am not allowed to dress up China's panda.

44. He'll try to dress me up to match.

45. Scotland will take pictures.

46. I am not allowed to dress up any of my brothers in dresses.

47. Even if Francis pays me.

48. Because my ass won't be worth a penny by the time that my brothers are through with me.

49. I am not allowed to steal Faroe's guitar.

50. He'll be upset. Really upset.

51. I am not allowed to sing the stereotype song. Ever.

52. I am not allowed to give Francis the spare key to England's house again.

53. See 31 and 32.

54. I am not allowed to break Scottie's windows.

55. See 13.

56. I am not allowed to claim that Denmark is 'my eternal lackey'.

57. I am not allowed to hit Prussia with a barge pole.

58. I am not allowed to buy Super Glue again.

59. Ever.

60. I am not allowed to fix wheels to Russia's desk so that if anyone leans on it it moves forward.

61. I am not allowed to dress as Canada and use this disguise to steal food.

62. Francis would be cross. Also see 48.

63. I am not allowed to give Scottie's password to Ladonia.

64. I am not allowed to pour colour dye into the wash.

65. I am not allowed Kool Aid.

66. I am never again allowed to dive into the Pacific from a boat.

67. I am not allowed to replace Canada's maple syrup with Cavonia.

68. See 48.

69. ...Oh, so much I could say about this if I was allowed.

70. I am not allowed to call China an old man.

71. I am not allowed to sleep on the roof.

72. See 24.

73. I am not allowed to tell Sealand stories of female pirates.

74. I am not allowed to sew lace onto England's uniforms.

75. Or his suits.

76. I am not allowed to hug Netherlands.

77. I don't know why, but my brothers made this clear.

78. I am not allowed to steal Switzerland's bullets.

79. Because he always has spares and a really good aim.

80. I am not allowed to take Spain's axe.

81. I am not allowed to fill Austria's pockets with Marshmallow Fluff.

82. The reason being that Hungary doesn't mind hitting my head with a pan.

83. I am not allowed to go near the toaster.

84. I am not allowed to go near the drinks cabinet.

85. I am not allowed to buy certain books or manga for Liechtenstein.

86. I am not allowed to tell people I am actually a boy.

87. I am female and if I pull that trick again my brothers will dress me in a frilly dress.

88. Poland will help them.

89. I am not allowed to buy a note catapult.

90. People think it's annoying.

91. See 25.

92. I am not allowed to buy Princess Resurrection if I will leave it where Sealand can get at it.

93. I am not allowed to play 'He's a Pirate' at three in the morning.

94. Or set it as a ringtone.

95. I am not allowed to 'accidentally' call Romania Edward.

96. He will earnestly explain the ways he can cause me harm if I do.

97. While smiling.

98. I am not allowed to go near my brothers with scissors.

99. I am not allowed to paint America's fighter plane. Or go near it.

100. I am not allowed to play the pocky game. My brothers swear they will kill whoever I play it with.