A/N: Hello, again! I don't really know how many of you out there are reading this, but I hope you're enjoying it. To be honest, I needed to write this, reviews or no, but, feedback is always appreciated :) Anyways, here's chapter three, which means only two chapters left!
Disclaimer: Everything belongs to J.K. Rowling, I'm just borrowing her characters for the sake of my sanity!
Three
-or-
Shake it Out
"And I've been a fool and I've been blind, I can never leave the past behind. I can see no way, I can see no way. I'm always dragging that horse around, our love has pastured such a mournful sound, but tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground. 'Cause I like to keep my issues drawn, and it's always darkest before the dawn."
-Florence + The Machine
Lily dreamed she was dying.
The walls around her were burning, the air choking her with smoke. She was curled up in a ball in the center of the room, simply waiting for the end to come.
And then, she realized that there was still hope.
She was a witch.
She pulled her wand out of her jeans, and shot a spell at the fire.
Nothing happened.
She tried again.
Not even sparks flew out of her wand. Tears were now running down her face in frustration. Just as it seemed like the smoke would consume her, a hand came out of nowhere—
—and wrapped itself around her throat.
"It's destroyed you, just as I said it would," spoke a familiar voice.
Petunia, her sister.
Lily awoke screaming, but she wasn't making a sound—someone was covering her mouth.
Panic set in, and she immediately flailed her limbs. She tried to reach for her wand, but before she could cast any spell, James Potter appeared in front of her.
She stopped struggling and glared instead as he tucked his invisibility cloak back into his robes. He held one finger up to his mouth and nodded to her sleeping roommates. She reluctantly pushed herself out of bed and barely had the sense of mind to grab her dressing gown before following James out of her dormitory.
They didn't speak until they had crawled out through the portrait hole.
"What the hell, Potter," Lily shoved him roughly, "I almost cursed you."
He looked apologetic, "I didn't mean to scare you, but I could tell you were having a nightmare and I didn't want you to wake anyone.
"What was it about?" he added curiously.
Lily ignored the question, "Why were you in my dorm in the first place?"
James looked as if he only just remembered the reason himself, "Right! Selwynn is back, and Avery brought friends this time."
"How many?" Lily asked.
"About ten."
"Shit," Lily muttered. Then she shook her head, "What are we waiting for? You can explain the details on the way."
James filled her in as they hurriedly made their way towards the abandoned classroom that had become their hiding place.
"I was checking the map for reasons I'd rather not disclose at this moment…"
Lily rolled her eyes.
"…when I noticed a suspicious amount of names on the seventh floor. I had just seen Avery come and go from the room when Selwynn appeared in front of the statue of Gregory the Smarmy."
Lily stopped abruptly, something in her brain clicking. "What did you just say?"
James furrowed his eyebrows, "Selwynn appeared in front—"
Lily shook her head, "Not that. Before. About Avery. Your exact words."
"Er, I saw Avery come and go—"
"Of course! I can't believe I didn't think of it before!" Lily slapped herself on the forehead.
James was still watching her with a bewildered look, "Care to translate for those of us not privy to the inner thoughts of Lily Evans?"
Lily didn't answer, but grabbed his wrist and began dragging him in the opposite direction opposite.
"Er, Evans? Lily? Where are we going?"
"Library," she said, paying no mind to his complaints and comments.
She didn't stop until they were outside the door. She paused; Lily wasn't against staying out past curfew to a point, but something just felt wrong about sneaking into the library of all places late at night.
"Should we…?" she asked hesitantly.
"Oh, please," said James, pushing her aside and walking through the doors.
Taking a deep breath, Lily followed.
"Are you going to tell me what we're doing here?" asked James, following her over to the History section.
Lily scanned the K's, "I was here last month, researching the disappearing room. I read something and didn't pay much attention to it at the time, but now—Aha!"
She pulled out a large tome and carried it over to the nearest table.
James sat down next to her, "Hogwarts and Me: the Autobiographical Tale of a Young Man's Education by Nicholas Kilgore. How invigorating," James snorted.
"It was rather boring," Lily agreed, flipping the pages hurriedly. She finally found what she was looking for and smiled in triumph, "This is it! I ignored it at first, not able to see the connection, but now I'm sure it can't be coincidental that he mentions a room that disappears periodically."
She ran her finger down the page until she came upon the sentence, "I told my dear friend Nelly, the house-elf, about this strange bathroom that seemed to come and go, and she smiled, saying that it was her 'most favourite' room in the entire castle. I did not bother asking why she loved a bathroom so much."
Lily closed the book with a triumphant snap! "Do you see?"
"You think a bunch of Death Eaters are getting together in a bathroom?"
In the name of their still-new attempt at civility, Lily decided not to slap him. "I don't see you having any better ideas! Besides, don't you find the house-elf's comment a little strange? What if it's not just a bathroom?"
James looked to be considering it, "That's actually a fair point. It's too bad we can't interrogate this house-elf ourselves."
"I know," Lily sighed.
They sat in silence for a moment until James suddenly sat up straight, "Or maybe we can! Quick, when was this book written?"
Lily opened the book to the front, "1895? You can't honestly think a house-elf from eighty years ago is still around?"
James smiled at her, "Sometimes, Evans, I forget you're muggle-born."
Lily tried not to be offended by his patronizing voice, "What is that supposed to mean?"
He ignored her, and this time he grabbed her wrist and dragged her out of the library, ignoring her protests and comments ("We can't just leave the book sitting out like that!").
Lily, not able to keep up with all the secret passages and short cuts James led her through, was soon lost. Until, at last, they reached a portrait with a large bowl of fruit.
"The kitchens?" Lily asked bewildered as James tickled a pear in the portrait.
As soon as they entered, they were greeted enthusiastically by two elves in spite of the late hour.
"Mr. Potter, Miss Evans! We is so happy to have visitors!"
"It's good to see you too, Pip," James nodded in the direction of a slightly plump elf and then turned to a female elf who looked ready to cry in excitement, "A pleasure as always, Addie."
"May we get you some tea, sir?" asked Pip.
"Or perhaps some biscuits, Mr. Potter?" added Addie eagerly.
James waved off their offerings, "No thank you. Listen, Evans and I need to talk to Tippy. Would you mind telling her I'm here?"
Pip bowed deeply, "Pip would be honored to help Mr. Potter."
Addie curtseyed, "Addie would do anything Mr. Potter asked! Mr. Potter and his friends are always so kind to us."
They both disappeared with a snap!
Lily raised an eyebrow.
James shrugged, "We like food."
Soon, a new house-elf returned in place of Pip and Addie. Her skin was so wrinkly, it seemed as if it was dragging the ground, and her long ears drooped down on both sides of her head. But her eyes still glimmered with glee and excitement.
"James Potter!" She greeted enthusiastically. "Old Tippy is so happy to hear he has come to visit her! And he brought the pretty and nice Miss Evans with him! Is he wanting Tippy to make him something for his date!"
Before Lily could correct her, James laughed, "We both know Lily would never go out with a scoundrel like me," he shot her a wink. "We actually need your help with something else."
Her grin was wide, and Lily thought a little creepy as she replied, "Anything for you, sir!"
"You're the best Tippy," James grinned charmingly. Lily rolled her eyes. "Do you remember an elf by the name of Nelly? She would have been working here around the time you first started."
"Oh, Tippy does remember Nelly! She taught Tippy how to make such a splendid pudding! Would Mister Potter and Miss Evans like Tippy to make them some?"
"Maybe some other time," replied Lily, kindly. "We were actually wondering about Nelly's knowledge of the castle."
"She once told someone that her favorite room in the entire castle was a bathroom on the seventh floor. Do you know what she's talking about?" Continued James.
Tippy pulled on the edges of her tea towel, stamped with the Hogwarts crest like every other house elf, as if deep in thought.
"The door to this room isn't always there," Lily added. "It can disappear."
Recognition gleamed in Tippy's large eyes and James and Lily grinned at each other in triumph.
"The Room of Requirement!"
"The room of 'Requirement?'" echoed James.
"We also calls it the Come and Go Room," continued Tippy.
"Of course!" said Lily. "What is this room exactly?"
Tippy looked delighted, "It's a room that only appears when someone has need of it! When they enter it, they find it filled with whatever they might need! We find the most excellent cookbooks and ingredients there when we run short."
"And if you needed a bathroom?" asked Lily, thinking of Nicholas Kilgore's autobiography.
"It would fill itself with chamber pots, miss!" Squeaked Tippy, clapping her hands in excitement, "It is a most splendid room!"
"So, how can you make it appear?" asked James eagerly.
"You must needs walk past the bit of wall across from Barnabas the Barmy's tapestry three times, concentrating on exactly what you require, sir."
James shook Tippy's hand excitedly, "Thank you so much, Tippy!"
When he let go, tears of joy were welling up in Tippy's large eyes, "Anytime, Mr. Potter," she blubbered, flustered at James's praise.
Lily gave Tippy a handshake as well, and then looked to James.
His eyes were fierce with adrenaline and anticipation.
"Shall we?" he asked.
Lily grinned, "Let's go."
James and Lily ran as fast as they could back up to the seventh floor, checking the map along the way.
"I can't find Avery anywhere, so I'd say there's a pretty good chance they're all still in there."
Lily let James's comment stand as they continued on.
They were out of breath by the time they reached the corridor.
"Do you mind if I…?" James asked, gesturing to the blank wall behind him.
"Go right ahead," Lily replied sitting against the opposite wall. She honestly wasn't sure how to start. Also, that run had really winded her.
He paced up and down the corridor three times, his face scrunched. Lily couldn't help but find him rather endearing when he was concentrating.
Endearing?
"Merlin, this has been a long night," she muttered under her breath.
James stopped suddenly, his face expectant.
And nothing happened.
"Fuck," he muttered and began the trek again.
After his third time of failure he turned around, finally noticing the cheeky grin on Lily's face.
"I'd like to see you do better, Evans," he grumbled, taking her seat as she stood.
Lily confidently paced three times up and down the corridor, all the while thinking hard: I need to see the place where Avery is going . . . Show me where Avery is hiding . . . I need to see what Avery is planning . . .
She stopped and turned to face the wall, feeling fairly confident.
Nothing happened.
She whipped around when James let out a loud bark of laughter.
"Brilliant work!" He quipped.
Lily glared back, "Oh, shut it, James"
She sat next to him against the wall.
Lily asked the obvious question on both their minds, "Why isn't it working?"
James shrugged, "I guess our wording is off."
Lily let out a huff in frustration.
They had been sitting for a couple of moments in silence, both lost in their thoughts, when suddenly, the door appeared right in front of them.
Lily stood up in excitement, ready sprint to the door before it disappeared again. But before she could take a step, James grabbed her by the arm and tugged her backwards. She stumbled and then fell, landing unceremoniously in his lap.
She opened her mouth to protest angrily, but James silenced her with one hand and had just managed to throw a familiar, light cloak over them when the door opened.
Lily stifled a gasp, and was suddenly thankful for James's quick thinking.
Thadeus Avery peeked his head out of the door cautiously before going back inside. A moment later he reappeared and was joined by two others.
Lily held her breath as they stepped into the corridor.
James removed his hand from her mouth and grabbed her forearm, and Lily suddenly remembered that she was sitting in James Potter's lap.
She stiffened, her back burning where it was pressed against his warm chest, her arm itching as he gave it a reassuring squeeze.
She suddenly felt a warm breath on her ear, causing shivers to run down her spine.
"Follow them," James whispered.
She stood, careful that the invisibility cloak was still covering them, and James stood soon after. James grabbed her hand and pulled her forward with a tug. They shuffled forwardly quietly until they were within earshot of the group of Slytherins.
"—don't know why we all have to be there. It might draw attention," a deep voice was saying. Lily recognized the voice—Quentin Mulciber.
"Who's going to be walking the corridors at three in the morning on a Monday?" replied the familiar voice of Evan Rosier. "Besides, we have to prepare, and this is the only place we can safely do it. It's easier to sneak one person into the castle than ten into the forest."
"I still don't see why we have to be there," grumbled Mulciber, "I could be in bed right now."
"Maybe you should have thought of that before you decided to help the Dark Lord!" hissed Avery, speaking for the first time.
Lily and James exchanged wide-eyed looks, gripping each other's hands tightly.
"Now will the two of you shut your damn mouths?" continued Avery. "The last thing I want to do tonight is perform a memory charm on Filch when he catches us."
Lily and James followed the group all the way back to the Slytherin common room and they remained silent the rest of the way.
When the door shut behind the Slytherins, James pulled Lily into a nearby broom closet. He quickly shut and locked the door, pulling off the invisibility cloak.
They stood quietly for a moment, trying to grasp what they had just overheard.
They both had expected something involving Voldemort, but there was no excitement in discovering their instincts true. All Lily felt was dread and fear.
"I feel just as confused as ever," she said, breaking the silence.
"Me too," agreed James.
"The only thing we know for certain is that they're helping Voldemort."
"And that they're preparing for something," James added.
Lily played with the ends of her hair thoughtfully, "You know, one thing confuses me still. He said they're 'helping' Voldemort, not that they've joined him."
"Does it matter, Lily? Just because they haven't joined him yet doesn't mean they won't."
"I suppose that's true. I still just think it's odd that he's placing this mysterious plan in the hands of a few Hogwarts students."
"That must be why they've been meeting with Selwynn. He's supervising them."
"You're probably right, but it just doesn't add up. What are they planning? And more importantly, when are they going to act?"
James clenched his jaw, "We need to get into that room."
Lily nodded in agreement, and then asked the question she'd been avoiding ever since she heard the voices of Rosier and Mulciber, since they'd seen Avery on the map for the first time.
"James, you said earlier that you saw about ten names sneaking around. Do you remember who you saw?"
He sighed, like he had been dreading the question almost as much as she was.
"Yes," he whispered.
Lily didn't need to ask him whom he saw—she could see the answer in his eyes.
Severus Snape was helping Voldemort.
"What's your count up to?"
It was a month later, and Lily was sitting in the Library alone. She engrossed in a Potions essay, when James's voice caused her to jump.
"James!" she exclaimed.
"Hey," he grinned at her flustered state, sitting down at the table across from her.
He continued to stare expectantly at her and she remembered that he had asked her a question. "29," she replied with a smug grin.
"Impressive." James smirked, "I made it to 47 about five minutes ago."
Lily's eyebrows shot up, "Wow, you've been busy."
He shrugged, "I haven't been able to sleep recently, so I thought I'd do something useful with my time."
"Like stalking some Slytherins?" she teased.
"Exactly," he agreed.
"James, I think we might be a little obsessed with this."
"I think you may be right," he laughed.
"Did James Potter just admit that I was right about something?"
"Don't get used to it. It was done out of pity."
"Pity?"
"I feel sorry for beating you so badly. Twenty-nine, was it?" he smirked, quirking an eyebrow.
"You realize that a lower number would be better in this case?" she pointed out. "That means I've failed less than you have."
"To the contrary," he replied, "it means you haven't put in as much effort as I have."
"Don't be bitter just because you're absolute rubbish."
"Like you're any better!"
"Shut up!"
"Original."
They grinned at each other widely. Both attempted to stifle their laughs so as to avoid the wrath of Ms. Pince, the touchy librarian.
James pulled a large textbook and some parchment out of his rucksack, plopping them onto the table.
At Lily's inquisitive look, he explained, "I might as well do some homework since I'm already at the library."
"James Potter!" Lily exclaimed, "I do believe this Head Boy-ship has turned you into quite the studious pupil."
"Don't count on it," he snorted. "I'm just too bloody tired now to do it at night, so I'm forced to work in broad daylight."
Lily shook her head, smiling, "You'll never change, will you?"
"Never," he affirmed, solemnly. "Now, let's get to it!"
She laughed, but she returned to her Potion's essay as he began poring over his Transfiguration book.
Lily looked down at her parchment and realized she had repeated the same sentence twice. She scribbled it out, trying to focus and clear her head, but after she had reread the same paragraph four times, she realized it was futile.
She looked up, watching James work closely.
He was engrossed in his reading, his eyebrows furrowed and his fingers tapping lightly on the table. Even as she watched, James ran a hand through his hair, mussing it every which way. It was a familiar gesture, and one Lily had misunderstood for a long time. He wasn't trying to make his hair look cool—instead, it seemed to be a nervous gesture, something he did unconsciously.
There were so many things about James Potter that Lily had misunderstood.
"Are we friends?"
She asked the question abruptly, interrupting their relative silence and causing him to look up at her in alarm. She was rather surprised herself.
James frowned, "I'm not sure. Are we?"
She shrugged, "It kind of seems like it. I mean, ten minutes ago we were laughing together. And we haven't argued with each other in weeks."
"And we have been working together for months to solve the mystery of the Come and Go Room," James added.
"And we've started doing our Head duties as a team instead of separately like we did at the beginning of the term," she concluded.
James smiled at her, the answer clear now, "Who would have thought? James Potter and Lily Evans: friends."
She laughed lightly and covered her face with her hands, "Mary and Diane will never let me live it down."
"I think the lads will be pleased—especially Remus." He grinned at her teasingly, "He won't have to play at mediator anymore."
"What will Hogwarts do without the two of us for entertainment?" She could imagine the reactions of their fellow students—they ranged anywhere from slightly startled to completely astonished.
"I'm sure the Marauders could think of something to fill the void," James suggested mischievously.
"Do I want to know?"
"Probably not." A beat, "Are you going to turn me in?"
"Probably not," she mimicked.
"Lily Evans letting me get away with something?" His hand gripped his chest as if in shock.
"Isn't that what friends are for?" she grinned back.
They grinned at each other a bit too long, and Lily had to mentally shake herself in order to look away. Something about James's eyes just seemed to drag her in.
"So," Lily began abruptly, clearing her mind, "do they know?"
She had been curious for a while now, but she had only just summoned the courage to ask.
"Does who know what?"
She sighed, "Do the Marauders know about all of this?"
"Our newfound camaraderie?" He laughed, "Well, I think they've noticed we've been getting on well together."
"That's not what I meant." She leaned in closer and lowered her voice, "You know, this—the forest, the Come and Go Room, Selwynn?"
Finally catching her meaning, James's eyes widened and he shook his head, "They don't know."
Lily let out a sigh of relief, not quite sure why James's secrecy was comforting.
"I don't know why I've kept it from them, to be honest," he shrugged. "We tell each other everything."
Lily put her hand on his arm in a comforting manner, "We don't even know what's going on. There's no use telling anyone until we figure it all out."
"I know, but I hate lying to them," he replied, staring at the desk in evident frustration.
"If only we could figure out how to get into that damn room," Lily sighed. "Then none of this would matter."
"Too bad the term ends tomorrow." He looked up and grinned at her, "I think this is the first time I haven't been excited to go home for the holiday."
Lily smiled back, but it didn't quite reach her eyes, "Sadly, I haven't been excited for Christmas in a few years now. It's actually my least favorite holiday."
James looked outraged, "What? Christmas is wonderful! You've obviously never been to the Potter festivities. Why is the Evans celebration so dreary?"
"Let's just say home doesn't quite feel like it anymore," she answered simply, unwilling to reveal anything more.
When James looked as if he would like to question her more, she stood and cut him off, "I suppose I should start packing."
She picked up her things quickly, ignoring the imploring look she knew James was giving her, "I'll see you in January, James."
She shot him a small smile.
He yelled at her back at she walked away, ignoring the wrath of Ms. Pince, "Happy Christmas, Lily!"
As soon as she was out of the library doors she released her breath. She felt hot all of the sudden and it took her a moment to realize why.
Petunia. The dream.
She could hear the words Petunia spoke as she slowly choked her, her voice filled with hatred and malice, "It's destroyed you, just as I said it would."
Lily sank to the ground, breathing heavily.
"So I guess it's actually true," said, perhaps, the only voice Lily wanted to hear less than that of her sister's.
Lily jumped up and whipped around, "Get the hell away from me."
Severus Snape ignored the vehemence in Lily's tone, and took a step closer, "I saw you just now. With him. How can you stand to be in his presence? You've always loathed him! Do you think he's changed? Don't be naïve, Lily; Potter is still just as arrogant as he's always been. And now you're friends?" He said the last word with a vicious sneer and, to Lily, it sounded like he was calling her a mudblood all over again.
"No!" Lily hissed.
She'd been able to push him to the back of her mind for the past month, but her earlier revelation came back to her all at once. Severus Snape was helping Voldemort.
"You called me a mudblood and chose your Death Eater friends, and now you don't get to know who my friends are!" she yelled. "You don't get to know anything about me! Stop pretending like you have a right to know my business, and stay the fuck away!"
Lily turned on her heel, but stopped when she was halfway down the corridor. She turned. Snape was still standing in the same place, his face stricken.
Perhaps it was cruel, but Lily didn't really give a damn anymore.
"And for your information, James has been a better friend to me in the past month than you ever were."
She didn't stay long enough to see his face contort with pain or anger, but she could imagine. She was furious at his presumption, his persistence. She wanted to scream, to curse him, to never have to see him again. But, somewhere, buried under two years of bitterness and grief, Lily's heart broke just a little.
Severus Snape was helping Voldemort.
