"Darth Vader walked toward his personal hanger quickly." –Scififan33, "The Force Is Strong with This One"
Commander Mahmee Dirast eased the closet door open with all possible care, and saw his prize gleaming, crimson and desirable, on the pole. With a grin, he reached up and lifted it off the hook; then he shut the door again, turned to leave the room – and practically fainted at the site of the black-clad figure standing behind him.
"Fancy meeting you here, Commander," said Darth Vader silkily. "The Force informed me that the notorious Closet Raider had dropped into my quarters, so naturally I hurried over to greet him properly. I had no idea it was going to be you."
"Lord Vader," Dirast gasped, "please, it isn't what it seems. I was only trying to protect your… I mean… there's a light on one side of it that won't… Lord Vader, please, if you'll just let meeeuuurrghh…"
As the suffocated body fell to the ground, Vader reached down and extracted his property from its stiffening fingers. "That won't be necessary, Commander," he said, and casually kicked the body to one side; then he opened the closet with a wave of his hand, and restored his personal cape hanger to its rightful place.
"This story contains mention of slavery so read with cation" –4gardiean, author's note to "The Discovery of Anakin Skywalker"
"'Now there arose up a new king over Egypt, which knew not Joseph,'" the primal midichlorian Hava read aloud to its millions of Bright-Edge offspring. "'And he said to his people, "Behold, the people of the children of Israel are numerous, and stronger than we. Come, let us wisely oppress them, lest they multiply, and it come to pass that, when there falleth out any war, they join also unto our enemies, and, having overcome us, depart out of the land."
"'Therefore he set over them taskmasters to afflict them with burdens, and they built for Pharaoh cities of tabernacles, Phithom and Ramesses. But the more they oppressed them, the more they were multiplied and increased. And the Egyptians hated the children of Israel, and afflicted them and mocked them; and they made their lives bitter with hard bondage, in clay, and brick, and in all manner of service in the field…'"
Amid the crowds of the listening Lords of the Force, one particularly sensitive midichlorian shuddered, and snuggled up closer to the sodium ion that it had smuggled into the assembly. When it had to listen to stories that contained mention of slavery, it always liked to have a free cation somewhere nearby; it helped it to remember that, however horrid such stories made life seem, there were still some things about the universe that were positive.
"'Alright, Rex, time to get the hell outta here!' [h]e called to the cot-pit." –CyanGalaxy, "Force Sensitive"
"What about the cots?" Rex shouted back.
"No time," said Anakin. "We'll have to leave them."
"What?" Rex was scandalized. "We can't leave the cots! These are what the younglings of the Jedi Order have slept in for a millennium; we can't just leave them to be destroyed!"
"If we stick around and try to save them, we'll be destroyed!" Anakin shot back, thrusting his thumb toward the nova-ready sun. "It'll be fine, all right? When we get to Scintillant and rebuild the Temple, we'll dig a new pit and throw some sleeping bags in it or something."
Rex looked dubious. "The ancient Jedi sleeping-bag-pit," he said. "Doesn't quite have the same ring to it, does it?"
"Get moving!"
"I was hoping that maybe you could…[u]m…deal with matter." –RobertoAG, "Eva Squad"
The Force ghost of Silvia Orden spread her insubstantial hands. "Well," she said, "you can see for yourself that I can't."
"No," Rosh Juall agreed. "No, clearly not. Um… when did this happen, may I ask?"
"Oh, a couple days ago," said Orden. "Some creep with a red lightsaber barged into my chamber while I slept, and… well, never mind, the details aren't pleasant. Anyway, the point is that, whatever dealings with matter you require, you're going to have to consult someone else from now on.
"Unless you should ever need something hit with lightning, of course," she added, as Juall was taking his leave. "In that case, just give me a holler."
