Dudley and Draco's (mis)adventures continue as they track down the er...'hippogriff'
Teensy weensy note for anyone not familiar with British slang. 'Bird' is often used to refer to a girl. You'll see why this is important...
Laura, please. You can have the stupid apartment, I don't care about that! Just…just let me see Samson again. I know he misses me. Please, just…
Laura Aberdeen smirked as she deleted Dudley's message from her voicemail. "Sot," she muttered, switching her mobile off. Samson whimpered in his corner and she sneered at him. "Settle down, mutt!" She huffed and walked over to the kitchen, pouring herself a glass of wine. Honestly, the stupid dog was a nuisance- always whining and whimpering and being a pain- but she'd be damned if she let Dudley have him. Hell no. She was keeping the house and the dog and her stupid ex boyfriend could just learn to live with…
"No no no! I meant th' other ugly, vicious bird from the depths of hell!"
Laura screamed and whirled around, knocking the wine to the floor. The sight in front of her made her eyes widen and then narrow almost instantly. Her ex-boyfriend was standing- swaying- right behind her, accompanied by a rather dishy looking blond. And they were both regarding her with unabashed curiosity.
"M tellin' you, she is a vicious bird!" Dudley argued. "Lives on pain 'n misery 'n everything!"
Laura screeched in outrage.
"See?" Dudley said smugly.
The blond looked her over again and shrugged. "Close 'nuff to the real thing," he declared.
Laura had had enough. "Dudley Dursley!" she shouted. "What the hell are you doing in my house? Who's this bloke? And…I locked the door! How did you even get in here?!"
"Still have m' key," Dudley explained.
"I wanted t' use th' fireplace," the blond declared sullenly. "But shertain people aren't open to new forms o' travel."
"I tol' you I don't like squeezing inna tight places!" Dudley whined.
Laura blinked, not entirely sure how to respond to this. It wasn't everyday you came across a couple of lunatics standing in your living room. Finally, she decided to focus her ire on a familiar target. "Get out of here," she spat at Dudley. "Get out of my house right now!"
"S my house!" Dudley argued. "You took it! And my dog! Where's Samson?" He started stomping around, whistling and calling for the mutt. "Samson? Here, boy! Come on out!"
Samson shot out of the kitchen like a bullet and plastered himself over Dudley, barking and wagging and whimpering for all he was worth. "I missed you too, boy," Dudley mumbled thickly. "Missed you so…"
Laura seethed. "Get away from him and get out of here," she spat. "Or I am going to call the…"
"Now hold on," the blond slurred, stepping in between her and Dudley. "You 'n I are gonna have a li'l talk, Buckbeak."
"What did you call me?!" Laura screeched.
The blond waved her off, continuing with his nonsensical rambling. "'S one thing to try and eat me when I was a kid. 'Spose we're even on account of I tried to kill you and all. But you do not, not stand between a man 'n his crup. That's not cool, a'right? Really bad form." He glowered and poked her shoulder disapprovingly.
Laura was too stunned to do more than gape. "You're completely crazy," she finally managed. "I want you both gone from here right now!"
"Not leavin' without Samson," Dudley declared, lifting his chin stubbornly and sheltering the dog. "Just lemme have him and I'll go Laura, I swear…"
"You heard th' man, Feathers," the blond drawled. "Shurren…surrendeded… give us the mutt and we'll be on our way."
"No!" Laura snarled, stomping over and wrenching Samson off Dudley by his collar. The dog whimpered pitifully and so did Dudley, and if she had turned around she would have seen the blond's eyes narrow dangerously. But Laura was too caught up in railing at her quailing, miserable ex to pay any attention to him. "You listen to me, you worthless sod! You'll have this dog over my cold, dead body! Shut up, you stupid mongrel! And as for you freaks, you have exactly ten seconds to get out of my house before I call the…"
~Obliviate~
Laura stilled and her entire body went rigid. She gasped and just as suddenly, it felt like she was floating and her mind was all hazy…it wasn't bad, just…strange…
She blinked as her apartment came into focus again. The two blurry figures hovering around her slowly cleared and she recognized one of them. "Dudley?" she murmured, rubbing her eyes sleepily. "What're you…sorry, I…I must have dozed off or something."
"S'alright," the blond stranger cut in, stepping over and giving her a charming grin. "You're just tired."
"I am?" Laura mumbled.
The blond nodded; all tousled hair and guileless, grey eyes. "Really, really tired. Cause…cause its hard takin' care of a dog an' a big house, amirite? Good thing we're here to take the mutt off your hands."
Laura blinked. She couldn't recall…but he…and they were…"Oh, of course," she mumbled. It made sense. Of course, it did. "You should have him, Dud. He misses you so much."
Dudley swallowed thickly. "I miss him too." He bent down and scratched Samson's ears gently. "So… I can take him?"
"Of course, ya big lug," the blond insisted, shepherding them out the door. "'s why you're here, 'member?" Laura watched dazedly as he practically pushed Dudley out the door, Samson following closely at his heels. The blond stopped to swipe her bottle of wine and give her another bright grin. "Thanks for bein' so understanding."
Laura nodded. "No…no problem. Hey, when did you…"
But he was already gone.
Reviews, pretty please? :D
