Chapter Three:

The lube coated tip of a finger slipped inside of me ever so gently, making me gasp instantly. "Yeah, you like that?" His voice rasped against my ear, a pleased smirk in his voice.

"Yes." I gasped, arching up off the mattress. "Take it slower." I instructed, he nodded doing as I said, watching me gasping again and again in gratification. He softly pressed butterfly kisses to my chest, slowly adding a second finger.

"Can I do it now?"

"You're really not a patient guy are you?" I glared at him. "If you don't care about your partners pleasure then no wonder you can't keep a boyfriend."

"Hey I can keep a boyfriend . . . I just don't one want." I glared up at him angrily. "Okay, I'm sorry. I'll keep going." He gave me a soft smile then added a third finger, making me gasp louder.

After a few more moments I gave him a nod. "Okay now . . . but don't force it." He nodded grabbing the condom from the bed beside me. He tore the packet open with his teeth; rolling it up his hardened length then rubbed enough lube on, lining up with me. He slowly eased himself inside, gently rocking his hips to go deeper. He softly growled as my body enveloped him perfectly, his hands gripping my hips slightly.

His moans and growls made me shudder slightly; feeling him deeper inside of me warmed my body head to toe with excitement. I felt something different, rather than before when his aim was to get in - get off - get out. He had more passion for his movements this time around. He still wasn't perfect, he still couldn't love me and he still wasn't Nick. Right here I realised I'm such a hypocrite. I've been getting down on Nick for settling with his relationship with Starla, while I'm doing the exact same thing with Ryan. I'm not in love with him, I'm settling.

"You know this isn't very good for my self esteem when the guy I'm screwing spaces out." Ryan said, looking down at me annoyed.

"Sorry . . . I was thinking. Keep going. I'll pay attention this time."

"Forget it." Ryan pulled out of me, collapsing on the bed beside me. "Other than me boring you to death, it was okay right?"

"Much better." I smiled at him.

"Why won't you tell Nick you love him?" He asked curiously, rolling to his side to look at me.

"I don't think now's the right time to tell him."

"But everything you've told me about him, it's pretty obvious he wants you. I think he's very deeply closeted with padlocks on the door. He probably doesn't even realise that he loves you."

"You really think so?" Ryan gave me a firm nod. I glanced up at the time then back at Ryan. "Aren't you gonna kick me out?"

"Right, I was thinking about it." He chuckled making me smile. "Do you have plans with Nick?" I shook my head. "Awesome, pizza it is." He went to climb off the bed, but rolled back to me, pressing a kiss to my forehead.

"What was that for?" I asked surprised.

"I don't know." He shrugged climbing off the bed to pull some boxers on then went to grab the phone. I leant up on my elbows watching him curiously. He wasn't pretending to be nice to me anymore, he really was being nice. Before he'd of never let me stay on the bed while he ordered us some breakfast, it used to be a pat on the back, 'thank you very much' then kicked out the door while he showered.

Ryan ordered our pizza then returned to the bed beside me. "So you keep coming over here straight after work huh?" He asked me curiously. "You must really like the things I do to yah?"

"Do you not want me to come over?"

"I don't mind." He smiled, crawling back towards the pillows to prop himself up. "I love seeing you every morning before I go to work."

I quickly rolled over to face him. "You're not falling in love with me are you?"

"Relax Babe; I just respect you more..."

"You didn't before?" I asked shocked.

"Sure I did," He nervously gulped. "I just thought of you as a sex toy before . . . but now you're kinda like a friend."

"No wonder you can't keep a boyfriend." I groaned, reaching for my clothes.

"God I'm such a fucking loser! I can't say anything right! Greg please don't go. I'm not falling for yah; I just like having you around." He crawled across the bed, taking my hands in his. "I don't have any gay friends; you're the first guy I can actually talk to about this stuff. You should know by now I have verbal diarrhoea. I didn't mean anything by it okay? Please stay babe."

I looked up into his sparkling baby blue eyes then nodded. He smiled then propped up the other pillows for me to lean against. If I ever did somehow get Nick to fall in love with me, my relationship with Ryan would really complicate things.

What have I got myself into?


I walked the long way home, kicking up the dirt with my feet in the brisk morning air. Straight after shift I went round to Ryan's place without telling Nick. I wondered if he even noticed or cared, maybe he's just banging another slut in his bedroom. Yeah right he's trying to work on his marriage! How does he expect his marriage to work out when he's still sleeping with other women? They only split for three days and he already bedded four women.

I stepped into the elevator, leaning sleepily against the wall as I rode all the way up to my floor. Maybe he's a sex addict? Or just really depressed. As the doors slid open I caught a glimpse of Nick kissing a redheaded babe with really long legs. Leaning towards the sex addict theory. I held the elevator for her, watching a deer in headlights expression form on Nick's face as he saw me exiting the elevator. Did he not expect me home? I live here too you sex craze manic!

"Mornin' Greg." He smiled as I stepped through the door.

"Why are you so happy?" I groaned dropping heavily to the sofa, flipping through the post on the coffee table. I put my feet up on the sofa, giving out a wide yawn. I was completely exhausted after a long shift then slightly better sex with Ryan this time that didn't leave me sore. I looked up realising Nick was staring at me. "What?"

"Are you mad at me Greg? You haven't talked to me in days." Nick lifted my feet off the sofa so he could sit down. "Did I drink all your coffee or somethin'?"

"Nope." I tossed the post onto the coffee table looking up at Nick through my long lashes.

"Then why are yah givin' me the cold shoulder G? What'd I do to you to deserve this?"

Turned my apartment into a sex shelter? "Nothing . . . I'm not giving you the cold shoulder . . . I'm just tired." I smiled at him, leaning against the back of the sofa. "So did you get the divorce papers through yet?" Nick shook his head. "Do you think you'll ever get back together?"

"I don't think so G."

"Do you want to?" I asked curiously. Nick shook his head again. "So you're going back to dating whores?"

"She wasn't a whore." Nick defended.

Her skirt was three inches long and her double D chest was hanging out for all the world to see! "You don't know her name do you?" I chuckled. Nick smiled shaking his head at me again. "She squeal when she popped?"

"No, she was a quiet one." Nick smirked. "How come you know everythin' about my dates, but you never tell me anythin' about yours?"

I shook my head then sighed heavily. "Ask away."

"Who have you been seein' lately?" He leant on his elbow against the back of the sofa looking at me. I nervously bit my bottom lip, looking right back into his eyes. "You embarrassed to tell me?"

"No . . . how do you know I've been seeing someone?"

"Because we leave work at the same time, but you don't come home for another hour or two. You must be seein' someone, and you're never hungry so you must eat with them too."

"Disadvantages of living with a CSI." I smirked at him with a wide grin. "I'm not exactly . . . seeing someone. They're not looking for a boyfriend either."

Nick raised his eyebrows at me. "So what? You're screw buddies or somethin'?"

"I guess." He continued to stare at me wide eyed. "Do I have something on my face?" Nick shook his head, awkwardly looking round at the room. I smiled to myself watching his cheeks flushing a slight pink shade. "Something wrong with that then?"

"No, I never thought you as the type to have a screw buddy. You're not in love with them are you?" I shook my head. "Things could get complicated with a screw buddy G. I had this one girl in college," I rolled my eyes at him, another one of Nick Stoke's conquests. Seriously he has a girl for every situation. "We were screw buddies then she fell in love with me, I had to break her heart coz I didn't love her back, I just wanted her for the sex then we couldn't see each other anymore, because things got so complicated between us."

"I'm not in love with them . . . and I'm not sure they know how to love."

He stared at me a moment then looked up at the clock. "Well I'm gonna go to bed . . . Night Greg."

Is that jealously I sense there Mr Stokes? "Good night Nicky." He smiled at me then climbed off the sofa, walking down the hall to his room. As his door clicked shut I leant back against the sofa with a wide grin on my face. Even though nothing was going right and I was afraid Ryan was falling for me, I couldn't help but smile at the fact Nick bails when I mention love.


"So how is it living with Greg?" Sara asked Nick, unaware I was in the room.

"It's nice livin' with a guy, after livin' with Starla for 3 years it's actually a relief. He doesn't care if I leave the toilet seat up, towel on the bathroom floor and he cooks with no complainin'." Nick chuckled; still unaware I was at the door behind him.

"Perfect setup." Sara chuckled. "Think you'll make an honest man out of him?"

"Cute." He frowned at her sarcastically. "Do you know who Greg's seein'?"

"Greg's seeing someone?" Sara asked with a smile on her face as she could see me.

"Yep, and he's bein' all secretive about it."

"Not jealous are you Nick?" Sara laughed.

"No." He blushed. "Why would I be jealous? You're the one that should be jealous, that boy loved you since the moment he saw you and you wouldn't give him the time of day. Bet you're regrettin' it now he's taken, huh?"

"I'm not regretting it and I'm not jealous." She smiled at him.

"Jealous about what?" I asked, making Nick jump.

"Greg." He smiled surprised. "We were just talkin' about the case." He nervously spoke, walking round the table to look at the evidence on it. I gave Sara a smile, joining them round the table as we went over what we had collected so far.


I knocked on Ryan's door again, anxiously waiting for him to answer. As soon as he opened the door, I gave him a wide smile. "I've got it." Ryan looked at me wide eyed with confusion. "I know how to make Nick admit he loves me." I said walking into his apartment.

"Nice to see you too." He said sarcastically, kicking his door shut then dropping to his couch. "So . . . what's this master plan genius?"

"I make a secret date with him. Valentine's day is coming up, when he goes wherever I pick and sees me . . . he'll know."

"Okay Greg, I've tried to be supportive, but I'm gonna have to tell you the truth. That plan is so dumb babe, it'll never work."

"Why not?" I asked surprised.

"If he goes on this secret date you pick and sees you, he'll think it's a joke or something." I dropped to the sofa beside him, putting my feet up on the coffee table. "Greg, why don't you try asking him how he feels, instead of doing it in huge steps?"

"But that would be too easy." I chuckled. "What if he rejects me then our friendships ruined?"

"What about us? We had sex first then the friendship later."

"Nick's an old fashioned boy. You don't like him do you?" Ryan shrugged not really giving me an answer. "Sometimes he gives me hints that he might like me then the next minute he's telling me about his latest conquests and I just wonna kick him out. I can't believe I live with a total man-ho sometimes. He has no respect for these women he's screwing, he doesn't even like them . . . yet they line up at the door to screw him."

"He notes enviously."

"Shut up." I scowled poking him in the side.

"You're just a little green eyed monster, Babe." He chuckled. "You know every day I let you come over here and talk about Nick constantly, and it doesn't bother me as much as it should coz I enjoy your company."

"Thank you."

"You're welcome . . . now can I go back to sleep. You may just be getting off shift, but this is my bedtime and it's a Saturday."

"Sure, do you want me to go?" Ryan climbed to his feet then shook his head, taking me by the hand off to the bedroom. He tossed my jacket onto the chair by his bed then ran his hands beneath the fabric of my t-shirt. He joined our lips for a heated bitter kiss, collapsing our bodies together onto the bed.

"Ouch." I winced. "You almost threw out my back."

"Sorry . . . lemme see."

"No." I firmly held my t-shirt down, staying face to face with him.

"Why don't you ever let me see your back?" He asked sounding annoyed.

"Because it looks horrible." He popped my jeans open, pulling them down to my knees, pushing them the rest of the way with his foot.

"Let me be the judge of that." He rasped against my neck, softly nipping at the skin.

"You don't really wonna see them."

"Let me see them." He climbed off me, pulling my t-shirt off my head then watched me reluctantly roll over. "Holy Shit!" He lay down beside me, tracing one with a chubby digit. "Do they hurt?"

"No . . . not any more anyway."

"How longs it been?"

"Nearly 2 years."

He ran his hand down my back, staring at the scars that patterned my back. "Maybe you don't have the perfect figure after all." He joked; I rolled over frowning at him. "I was kidding babe. They don't look so bad. You're still gorgeous Greg." He slid my boxers off, straddling my thighs again. Then joined our lips, holding my arms down with a firm grip as he slid his tongue deeper into my mouth. He rolled our bodies again so I was on top then reached for the lube, slipping his fingers inside of me while I was sat on his hips. "You like that babe?"

"Yes." I gasped.

"Now ride me." Ryan ordered. He withdrew his fingers and lifted me, rolling a condom up his length. He slicked himself up then lifted me up, lining me up with his shaft. I slid down his hardened member, taking his full length inside of me.

I braced myself with my hands on Ryan's chest as he began to thrust into me, sending jolts of electricity up my spine. Ryan held my hips as I rocked on his shaft slowly beginning to build up speed.

I could tell by Ryan's expression that he couldn't take the slow pace any longer; he rolled me onto my back without losing his seat in my narrow passage. I was flexible enough to raise my knees to my chest, gaining him full access. He was driving hard now, pounding into me, sweat dripping from his hair, tracing a shining path over his pale faced skin, continuing to thrust until his body shook with excitement.

We both came together, shaking as the boil of ecstasy washed over us.

Ryan rolled off me, arching his chest up and down off the bed heavily breathing, trying to come down from his high. I lay flat against the bed, feeling exhausted. Ryan crawled back on his elbows towards the pillows. I weakly rolled off the bed, gathering my clothes from the floor.

"You can't come over tomorrow, my mom's visiting." Ryan shouted after me. "I'll see you Monday if you want."

"Okay." I grabbed my coat off the chair then walked off out the apartment, heading home for some sleep again.


I silently stepped through the front door, hearing heavy breathing coming from down the hall. I tossed my keys onto the side, kicking my shoes off in the hall as I tip toed towards my bedroom. At first it sounded like noises of pleasure, but then I heard desperate cries of 'no' and 'help me'. I pushed Nick's door open, seeing him thrashing about in the sheets in a panic. I couldn't just leave him to his terror; I had to wake him up.

"Nicky, Nicky." I softly shook him, trying to hold his flailing arms down. "Nicky! Nicky!" I shouted louder, but still no response. I knelt on the empty side of his bed, giving him another shake. "Nick! Nick! Wake Up!" Nick's eyes snapped open; he reached out for me like I was an intruder then realised it was me. He panted heavily looking round the room while his body trembled, sweat dripping from his forehead, scoring a line down his perfectly tanned face.

"Nicky you okay?" I whispered softly. Nick nodded, putting his forearm across his eyes. I watched his breathing beginning to slow and his arms calming from their trembling.

"What are you doin' in here?" He removed his arm from his eyes to look up at me.

"I heard you screaming."

"Shit!" He wiped the dampness from his face then looked up at me again. "Sorry I woke you."

"No, it's okay, I just got in." I went to crawl off the bed, but Nick grabbed my wrist holding me in place.

"Wait! Can you stay a minute?" He asked in a vulnerable child like voice with big puppy dog eyes. How could I turn that down? I nodded sitting back on the bed beside him. It was weird to see Nick so vulnerable; he was always so strong and brave. He walked out of the hospital on his own two feet, returning to his life like nothing had happened right after we rescued him.

I admired him for that.

Nick's body still quivered from the terror his dream had put him in, more than anything I wanted to hug him, but I didn't think he'd be comfortable with it since he was topless in bed. A single tear rolled down his cheek as he stared up at the ceiling, trying to calm his breathing. "It's okay Nicky." I whispered softly, lying on the bed beside him with a few inches between us. "You're okay now Nicky." He nodded covering his hands over his eyes, wiping the tears that threatened to fall. "Let's take your mind of it. Do you have plans for tomorrow?"

"Day off . . . you're workin' right?" He panted heavily in a vulnerable voice.

I nodded. "Yep, you planning on doing anything for your day off?"

"Not really. I might do the laundry if you have anythin'?"

"Sure, I'll leave it out before I go."

He gave me a soft smile as his breathing returned to normal. "Thanks Greg."

"You're welcome." I watched Nick getting into a comfier position again. "Don't go away okay?" He asked in a sweet vulnerable voice, looking back at me.

"I won't." He gave me a smile then softly began to close his eyes, trying to get back to sleep again. I couldn't help but stare at the amazing sleeping form before me. He looked so peaceful and beautiful and he wanted me to stay. Can't think too much into it though, he's in a vulnerable state after all. I told myself not to fall asleep as it would be weird if we woke up together, especially as I roll and move a lot when I sleep, but my eyelids felt so heavy and Nick was already softly snoozing beside me. Before I knew it I drifted off into dreamland, desperately trying to keep my eyes open, but they stayed glued shut.


I opened my eyes looking around the room, realising I was in the wrong room. I stretched out then looked down at the arm draped around my waist. I bit my lip turning to the sleeping form beside me. Oh Shit! He was lying on his side, right up against my body with his face very close to my shoulder, I could smell his musky breath and it really wasn't helping matters. I carefully tried to lift the arm off my waist, without waking Nick, but as I tried to move Nick began to softly stir. This was my biggest fantasy to wake up in his arms, but this was extremely inappropriate and completely the wrong time.

I lifted his arm again, easing myself off the bed then placed his arm back on the empty space, I tried to scramble off the bed without disturbing him, but as Nick gave out a soft moan, rolling to his back I fell to my knees, crashing heavily to the floor.

"Ouch, Shit!" I winced angrily as Nick's floors were hardwood.

"Greg? You okay?" Nick crawled to the edge of the bed looking down at me.

"I'm fine." I awkwardly smiled. "Sorry, I fell asleep. So did my legs." I chuckled making him smile.

"You didn't break anythin' did you?" I shook my head, climbing to my feet, stumbling slightly as my dead legs hit the floor.

"I'm fine, you want coffee, I can go get us some coffee..."

"G, breathe for me." Nick smiled sitting on the edge of his bed.

"I'm breathing." I smiled, stuffing my hands on my hips.

Nick's smile spread wider. "I'm not gonna hit cha for doin' somethin' I asked Greg."

"Okay." I sighed in relief.

"Thanks for stayin' with me. In that coffin I was alone . . . it helps havin' someone with me."

"You're welcome. Don't worry, I won't tell anyone." I smirked with a wink.

"Good, I won't tell anyone you suck your thumb either." Nick smirked back.

"I do not." I protested, thinking I hadn't sucked my thumb for years, like since college.

"Yeah you do." He laughed. "I woke up a couple of hours ago and you were suckin' your thumb." I blushed with embarrassment. "Relax, I'm not gonna tell anyone. You know tons of secrets about me anyway." I just figured out another secret too, if he woke up a few hours ago, why didn't he wake me to get me off his bed and why did I wake up with him lying right beside me at the edge of the bed with his arm draped across my waist?

The plot thickens...

Or maybe he just rolls when he sleeps too. That sucks! Either way, I couldn't stop thinking about it all day at work. Then back at the apartment, every time I looked at him, I tried to study his expression, trying to tell if he truly felt anything more than friendship for me.

"Hey G, I'm goin' out for the night so don't wait up." He called from the kitchen.

"Where are you going?" I asked curiously, clicking the TV off.

"I'm takin' Starla out for dinner." He smiled, pulling his jacket on.

"What?" I asked completely shocked. "Why?"

"She's my wife..."

"Wife that's giving you a divorce." I remarked at him. I suddenly realised I sounded a little jealous so I kept my mouth shut. Shit! I hate it when Ryan's right.

"She's had a change of heart. I'm not movin' back in with her G, I'm not stupid, but she wanted to talk." He smiled at me, grabbing his keys off the table. "I'll see yah later." He winked.

"Bye." I groaned. Great! I sighed heavily, throwing the remote angrily. I don't think Nick has any real feelings for me, it's not like he slept with me anyway, so I don't know why I'm so attached. I'm pathetic. Nick's a straight ladies man, there's no chance in hell he'd ever want to be with me. Like Ryan said, I'm too much work.


Please Review, I hope you're enjoying it.