Fear, I learned the next day, can mess with your mind in unimaginable ways. It warps normal things into terrifying ones and spreads like a disease into every cell in your body. You could be feeling totally okay, but fear will make your body turn to ash.
To say I was scared shitless was a grand understatement. I couldn't even bear to leave my bed the next day. Fear was playing cruel games with me, making me nauseous every time I tried to sit up, giving me a headache whenever I tried to turn, and haunting me with Draco Malfoy every time I closed my eyes. Every creak in the empty dormitory was him coming to curse me. Every shadow outside was him carrying on with his evil misdeeds. Every single second was poisoned by him.
There was no way that he could get into the Gryffindor common room, much less the girl's dormitory. But the worst was when I began to think about what was going to happen that night. Goosebumps spread down my neck to my hands and down my back and my legs whenever I even began to think about him and the Room of Requirement. The goosebumps seemed to be inside me as well, because my entire body went numb and cold. And then my stomach clenched and I could taste bile in my throat. And then shame stained my cheeks. I was supposed to be a strong, brave, Gryffindor, but I was cowering under the covers.
Fear also was also exhausting and it took every ounce of strength to fight my apprehension and get some sleep. But it felt like the moment I had drifted off, footsteps right by my bed woke me up.
I shot out of bed, wand clamped between my fingers.
"WHAT!" I screamed.
"Whoa there," said Parvati Patil walking from her bed to mine, "Why are you so worked up."
I was about to answer her, but the adrenaline that had suddenly coursed through my veins had vanished and the sickening fear had returned.
"I'm going to get something to eat, you want anything?" Parvati asked.
I heard her cross over to the door when I realized it was dark out and I could see the shadows of all the other girls fast asleep in their beds. "Hey, Parvati, what time is it?"
"One AM."
Now it felt like my stomach had disappeared. I was late and I had no idea what the consequences for that were. What would Draco do to me. Another round of adrenaline shot through me so I leapt out of bed and pulled on my cloak. I blew past Parvati blatantly ignoring her questions.
I was in the Room of Requirement in two minutes flat. A metal door was etched into the solid stone. With a great heaving breath, I opened it and stepped in.
The first thing I noticed was everything. Books in teetering masses, piles of broken furniture, heaps of discarded jewelry and broken statutes, torn mattresses, old clothes, shoes. Noises of backfiring brooms which limped overhead and the scratches and squeaks of rats filled the air, but beneath all the sound was the unmistakable dull hum of magic.
"Malfoy?" I shouted into the abyss of junk before me. There was no answer, so with another deep breath I trudged forward. The shadows and creaky noises were multiplied by a million here, each one of them tainted with Malfoy. Fear was making my knees weak and my chest sore but I convinced myself to continue.
"Hey!" I shouted again, stepping leaping over a suspicious looking puddle. To my left, a pile of debris rose sky high. To my right, a cabinet overflowing with papers. Ahead was just more of everything.
Suddenly I felt something clamp around my shoulder. I whipped my wand out.
"REDUCTO!" I screamed.
The body of Draco Malfoy sailed across the room and landed on a pile of rubbish with a dull thunk. I stumbled backwards into a stack of books which immediately fell over. One of them started screaming, adding to the din of the room.
I was back on my feet in a moment and walked over to where Malfoy was struggling to stand. I put a foot on his back and pushed him back down, hard. Fear was gone, but the adrenaline in my system was coming from anger.
"Why can't we meet without trying to curse each other?" I scoffed taking advantage of the adrenaline still coursing through me.
Malfoy turned his head and looked at me with helpless eyes. I smirked, "Scared?"
Suddenly, his hands grabbed my ankle and dragged my feet out from underneath me. My head collided with the floor and immediately my eyes began stream. Just as my vision began to clear I saw Malfoy's face just inches from mine. He was sitting on top of me, pinning my arms to my side. His unbelievable cigarette and soap smell filled my body. My pulse was racing and fear had infected me yet again.
"Get away from me," I whispered.
"What was that, Mudblood?" he breathed into my face.
"I said, get away from me." Tears were stinging the back of my eyes again and I could feel a lump in my throat. I hated being so powerless.
He let out a sarcastic throaty laugh, "Oh Granger, I don't think so. The second I let you go, you'll try to curse me. So I'll tell you how this is going to work."
My entire body was heaving and I could feel my hips rubbing against his. Heat flared up between my legs again and I hoped to god Malfoy couldn't feel it.
"I'm going to take your wand, Granger," he said, "And you're going to help me. Understood. Or else, I'll make your life-,"
"A living hell." I said, completing his sentence.
"You are smart," he said. I felt one of his hands slither down mine and his fingers on my hand. I didn't realize I was holding my wand in a vice-like grip until he began prying my fingers open one by one. It made my hand feel like it was buzzing with electricity
After what seemed like a lifetime, Malfoy got up. He put my wand in his jacket pocket and held out a hand for me. I looked at it, seriously contemplated kicking him in the crotch, and finally decided to ignore it as I stood up.
"Come on, now," he said, in a mock offended tone, "Don't be like that. We're working together now."
He knew that struck a nerve, but I just looked down at my shoes and decided not to give him the satisfaction of seeing me angry. I just brushed myself off.
"Just tell me why you need my help," I said.
"Right this way," he said jogging in front of me. I followed him, trying to keep up with his long legs. I hadn't realized how much taller he was than me. In fact, I barely reached his shoulder.
And then he stopped, right in front of a huge thing. It was covered in a sheet and emitting a faint buzzing noise.
"What is this," I asked.
"Not so fast," he replied, "You'll ruin the surprise, Granger."
Then he reached up and grabbed the sheet. It fell off gracefully to reveal a gigantic black box covered in little inscriptions and carvings.
"A vanishing cabinet?" I gasped.
I saw Malfoy nod. The gleam in his eyes had been replaced by confusion, "I can't figure out how to work it."
Curiosity had overtaken me. I approached it cautiously, putting hand up to feel the carvings. My mind was racing. What on earth was making Malfoy interested in a Vanishing cabinet?
"I've only read about these once," I said, "In Hogwarts A History. It said that Hogwarts used a have a Vanishing Cabinet so that the headmaster could leave if he ever wanted to, without lifting the Anti-Apparition Charm."
Malfoy stepped up next to me, "That's fantastic. How does it work?"
I shook my head, "Beats me."
"Seriously, Mudblood," he said, eyes smoldering, "I go through all this trouble to help you out, and you say, 'beats me'?"
I looked at him and smirked, "When have you ever helped me? You know, I hit my head pretty hard when you knocked me down."
He smiled, "Oh yeah?"
"Yeah," I said, "I think I may even have a concussion. And I still have marks where you attacked me with those ropes."
I held out my hand and he went to pull up my sleeve, but I snatched my hands away before he touched them.
"You know," he said, now smiling, "I'm pretty sure I have marks too. And lets not forget you just blasted me back like 20 feet," with ever word he seemed to be getting closer to me, " I won't hurt you if you don't hurt me first."
I caught my breath. What had just happened? Were Malfoy and I flirting? No. No no no no no no. This wasn't happening.
"I have to go," I said quickly leaping backwards from the vanishing cabinet.
"So soon?" Malfoy asked.
"Yeah, early class tomorrow," I lied, "I'll go to the library tomorrow and try to read some more."
I was talking a million miles per second now, backing up from Malfoy and the Cabinet and everything I was so scared of. Instead, a weird kind of guilt was filling me up. I saw the door of the Room surprisingly quickly and broke into a sprint. But it wasn't until I had reached Gryffindor common room that I realized, Malfoy still had my wand.
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