"There you are lets go," Maura said bouncing up to Jane's side in her running gear.
Jane glance over her shoulder looking less then amused at her overly bubbly friend.
"Pass," Jane grumbled.
"Not an option lets go," Maura said tugging on her arm.
"No Maur I already showered."
Maura leaned over and gave her friend a little sniff.
"Last night or this morning?"
Jane grabbed her fork pointed it at her friend. Maura jumped back and put her hands in the air.
"All right…but Jane you have to exercise….you need endorphins to get over your depression."
"Hey I am not depressed," Jane said getting defensive.
"You're going to get over Casey Jane but you have to get back out there and start living your life again."
Jane just rolled her eyes; she made it sound so easy however it was anything but. The more Jane thought about it she wasn't ready to get over Casey yet. There were still too many unanswered questions that Jane wanted answers to before she could get any sort of closure. They had been talking as regularly as their jobs would allow…sometimes it would be weeks between their conversations depending on Casey's missions. Jane had thought he was just on a mission and was floored when she walked into his office. So many reasons for not contacting her when he got back to Boston were running through her head all equally heartbreaking.
"Jane."
"No Maura I'm full and I am not depressed see happy," she said putting on a very fake smile.
"You are stage 4 of the 5 stages of relationship grief."
"What did you do Wikipedia that," Jane asked stabbing her fork into her bunny pancakes?
Maura just gave her a funny look before shaking her head.
"Oh my god you did look that up. Well I am in stage 5 of ignoring you," Jane said closing her eyes and plugging her ears with her fingers.
Maura pulled her fingers out of her ears.
"Denial, anger, bargaining, depression and accepting….a nice run will get you to accepting and healing Jane.
"I don't want to accept and heal I want to eat my pancakes….god why does she have to make them look like bunnies," Jane whined.
"I think they taste better like that vanilla," Rondo said with a wink.
"Here enjoy," she said passing them off and getting out of her chair to try and escape her nagging friends request to run.
Jane was never happy when she was given the alert another body was found but today she was grateful for the interruption.
"You can get your endorphin high now," Jane announced.
"Great you're going to go running?"
"No, dead body and looks like you're running to the crime scene….try not to take too long," Jane said with a smirk as she left the café.
"Jane," Maura called out hoping she wasn't serious. "Jane come on wait up," Maura said chasing after the detective.
Frost and Korsak were back in the squad room trying to unlock a cell phone and running background checks on bus drivers along their victim's known and unknown routes.
"Hey you're in my…..oh my god what the hell is that," Jane said jumping half way across the room.
Frost couldn't help but laugh as Korsak tried to stifle his smirk.
"This is Marlene…our used to be suspect's old lady."
"Oh gross and what do you mean used to be?"
"His story checks out…landlord said he was up all night yelling at her."
"Oh great….well can you get this thing out of my chair," Jane whined.
"Sure but you know this is nothing compared to what Maura might do to you. I can't believe you made her run to the crime scene."
"Hey I didn't make her do anything I just didn't wait for her. She has a car she could have driven."
"You know the Dr. when she panics she stops using that big brain of hers and takes things literally."
Jane couldn't help but chuckle thinking back to the crime scene earlier. She really couldn't believe it as she saw Maura jogging up to the crime tape…she really did run there. Maura walked into the squad room and Jane quickly ducked her head down and tried to make herself look busy.
"Lets go."
"Go where," Jane asked looking up.
"To the gym."
"You mean you didn't get enough of a workout running to the crime scene this morning," Jane said trying not to laugh.
"Very funny you could have waited 5 minutes for me."
"And you could have driven your own car there."
"Even though you're being extremely rude you're still coming to the gym with me."
"No, I am not…I am going to go workout on my couch," she said tossing down her pen and leaving.
Maura looked at her friends retreating form frustrated and worried.
"I said something about Casey do you think that sent Jane off," Korsak asked worried he hurt his former partner.
"No, she just needs to come around on her own time."
Even though Maura had told Korsak Jane needed time she certainly was not going to let her best friend just push her away. After gathering her things she headed over to Jane's apartment.
"Look I am sorry you ran to the crime scene Maura but I'm not going to the gym."
"Well it doesn't look like you're sitting on your butt either…what are you doing," she asked walking into Jane's apartment.
Jane had her workout clothes on and her hands wrapped and tapped up looking like she was ready to box.
"I'm just going a few rounds with Bob."
"Who is Bob," Maura asked a little hurt Jane was letting someone else help her through this?
Jane pointed to something behind Maura. When she turned to check it out she jumped and clutched her now rapidly beating chest.
"You know I hate that thing. I still don't see how Frost and Korsak thought this would be a good recovery gift."
"Oh I am getting plenty of use out of it," Jane said going back to punching the life size dummy.
"Picturing Casey's head?"
"You have to," Jane started landing a few hard shots on Bob, "stop saying that name," she added really laying into it, "or I am going to start picturing you up here."
"I don't think he would look as good in my blue pumps and mini," Maura shot back.
Jane paused and couldn't help but laugh. It wasn't often Maura cracked a joke that was actually funny. Jane took a couple of calming breaths and went back to her workout, this time a little more relaxed.
"Look Maura I'm fine really….I will be fine. It is just going to take time..Casey and I were on again off again for over a year…and then he suddenly went off again without even saying anything to me. I have no idea what I did and I guess I never will."
Maura felt her heart breaking and wanted so badly to tell Jane everything she knew…however she wanted to give Casey the chance to be the man and talk to Jane himself. She knew he was going through a lot not only adjusting to being back from war but also a life changing injury he needed some time to come to terms with things but she would only let it go for so long as her best friend was suffering.
With few leads Jane was relying heavily on anything Maura could find on the bodies. After the first girl showed up they thought they had a solid suspect until a second body appeared and the suspect had a solid alibi for that one.
"Jane stop pacing."
"Well if I don't pace then I will hover and we all know how much you love when I hover."
"Continue pacing," Maura confirmed. "DNA takes time Jane you know this."
"What I know is we just let a killer walk out of this building…I need something anything."
Maura went back to her processing as Jane's phone buzzed.
"You have to be kidding me," she mumbled.
"Oh if that is one of those texts from a vacation club don't respond it might be a scam."
"Does this look like a scam to you," Jane said handing over her phone.
Maura looked confused at the phone.
"It's Casey."
"He wants to meet for drink at The Dirty Robber."
"Are you going to go?"
"I don't know I just want to catch this killer," Jane said not happy her head was now spinning again.
"Jane I think I have something."
If today hadn't already been hard enough having a young kid shot by his father to cover up the murder of his mother she was now standing 15 feet away from Casey. His back was to her so he hadn't seen her yet and she was tempted to run. Not knowing would have been easier than him telling her to her face she wasn't good enough.
"Hi Casey," she said walking up to him
"Jane hi," he said with a big smile.
Jane wished he didn't seem so happy to see her just to break her heart.
"So," he said very nervous.
"So."
"You want to get a drink?"
"Yeah," she said with a nervous smile knowing alcohol would definitely be needed tonight.
"I am really glad you wanted to meet Jane," he said.
Suddenly Jane didn't think he wanted to ends things with her. He seemed to really be happy they were hanging out tonight.
"Me too Casey….I just want to start over….
"Me too."
"And slow….I don't know maybe meet once a week for a run."
"A run?"
"Yeah hell I will even take up roller blading again."
Casey huffed and rolled his eyes.
"Pay back is a bitch," he said reverting back to the bitter tone he had when Jane first saw him.
"What?"
"You know I was sooo happy when I got that note, I really thought you wanted to see me and it really didn't matter," Casey said turning to leave.
"No, wait what are you talking about? What note?"
It was then Jane saw the crutches Casey was reaching for.
"Penetrating spinal cord injury….all it takes is a dime size piece of shrapnel in the right place…you happy?"
"Case wait I didn't know."
"Yeah well now you do?"
"It doesn't matter…..I didn't know….but if you had told me I would have said the same thing….it doesn't matter," Jane pleaded with him begging him with her big chocolate eyes to believe her.
Casey had a million thoughts running through his head. At first he was so happy Jane had wanted to see him again even after he pushed her away. Then he threw up his defensive walls again when he thought his worst nightmare was coming true and Jane really thought of him but nothing but a cripple. Now he knew it was all a misunderstanding and when he looked across the table at those beautiful eyes he knew it really didn't matter.
"Roller bladding really?
Jane couldn't help but chuckle.
"Yeah sorry about that."
"I do want to see you Jane…I just need some time."
"Ok, maybe we can start by getting our phone calls back…I missed talking to you Casey."
"Me too and I think that sounds like a good place to start."
"And hey it won't even be long distance anymore," she said with a smile. "I can't believe you have been back for months."
"I am sorry Jane. When I first got back to the states I wasn't in a good place…I am not exactly in the best place right now but I am getting better now," he said smiling as he grabbed her hand.
"You don't have to tell me but…
"A road side bomb."
Jane gasped. A bomb! Bombs kill people…she knew he was in a war zone and soldiers were always in danger and often times made the ultimate sacrifice for their country but she just always assumed Casey would be fine…he was her Superman.
"Casey," she whispered with tears in her eyes.
"It was bad Jane..…I will tell you more about it later but I wanted you to know….
"Know what," she asked almost scared to know the answer?
"That it was you Jane."
Jane looked confused as he went on to explain.
"It was you that got me out of there alive Jane….knowing you were here waiting for me…whenever I closed my eyes I saw your face and knew I had to get back to you no matter what."
Jane now couldn't help a couple tears that trickled down her cheeks.
"I know I pushed you away…I was a total idiot when I first saw you again…but know that without you I am not sure I would even be here."
This was not at all how Jane had expected the night to go. She thought for certain Casey was going to break all ties with her but instead was here saying with her he might not made it out of that god forsaken desert. They kept the rest of their conversation light and Casey left soon after, but they had agreed to speak soon. Even though Casey had requested Jane not watch him leave he knew she would and she did. It broke her heart seeing Casey struggle on his way out but she was going to be there for him in whatever way he needed….they both were just going to need time.
