So I don't own HTTYD
Hey,
I'm so sorry for not posting this sooner, but life got in the way. Also thank you to the people who favourited and reviewed
So to answer the questions
MMM - Hiccup did not bring his family along cause he wasn't allowed to and he didn't want to put his family in the position to have to deal with the berkians. And I will leave the information about Stoic and Astrid until the next couple of chapters
I am putting a warning on this chapter because it does have mentions of suicide and self harm.
But anyway enjoy!
Chap 3 ~~~ :D
"Guys wake up, WAKE UP, quickly. There is something huge coming." I feel quite anxious because Abagaile is yelling and she barely ever does that.
We all wake up with a start wondering what is going on
"Well shit, we are going to have to leave now if we ever want to get to Berk."
"What is actually going on guys?" Ehsan asks
"There is a pack of wolves heading our way and they look hungry." Abagaile replies anxiously.
"Really that's all? Can't we just let the dragons protect us?"
"No, we really should leave the wild life alone just so we don't kill them off, only engage with them if necessary." I add in
"Everyone up in the tree's" Erland says while sighing
Toothless and I are already up here because we were sleeping here but everyone else seems to want to get up quick. We also hear some sort of alarm going off in he the town strip near towards the main building. This is followed by many sounds of doors closing. They must have these animals come through a lot because there are not that many other sounds no screaming or anything just calm movement.
"Guy's shut it I can hear something" Erland says, somewhat trying to quieten his voice.
We all fall silent as we also hear the sounds of running paws and the howls of the coming wolves. We all did really well to move as fast as we did. It took us about 2 min to get up and in the trees. If we were any longer the wolves that are now under our feet would have trampled us. It was good that Abagaile was paying attention. Hi-jinx must have warned her, either that or she had gone for a morning flight and saw them heading our way.
"Right I think we are clear."
"We should pack up camp and salvage what ever the wolves have not taken or squished, mate. So we can head off," Erland says to the Squad
"Yeah we should, the sooner we get there the sooner we can go home afterwards." I sigh
"Ok guys lets get moving"
There is a bit of a mess from the wolves that came through but most of it is just the left over blankets and camp fire embers all in a bit of a pile across the forest floor. Some of it can be washed out at the nearest stream or beach.
While I am packing my blanket into Toothless' saddlebag I think about how this mission is going to turn out, like what on earth am I going to say to my father. Hey sorry for this I really don't want to be here but my king has basically ordered me so stop trying to hunt down our dragons or we will be forced to declare war on you and you will lose so don't try it, oh and don't expect me to stay and resume the place of heir either, that ain't happening.
I am so engrossed in thought that I don't realise that I am growling with the blanket balled in my fist. Erland is now looking at me, concerned. I look up and half smile as if to say I'm ok.
He didn't by it.
Erland and I are to close for that to work anyway. He knows that I'm not ok. I really am still kind of numb to the idea of going back to berk.
"Okay mate we are all right to go." Erland state on behalf of the squad
"Okay then, I'll go let Casper and Runa know that we are going then"
"You guy's want to wait at the entrance of the town?"
"K mate, we'll be ready"
With that I fly off to the office building that is in the middle of the town. Toothless and I land on the other side of the building this time so that we don't risk Toothless getting sick. We walk in and the receptionist is paying attention to when we walk in this time, she must have gotten a bigger shock yesterday then we thought.
"Are either of them in?" I ask
"Yeah Casper is, go right in."
"Thanks" with that I walk into the shared office with toothless following and finding a bit of ground to perch on for the minute.
"Hey there Colby, how are you this morning?"
"Good thanks, we are actually about to take of to the next island."
"Ah, well then I hope you have a good safe flight. Also Runa asked if you could give this letter to Prince Ehsan" he says handing me enveloped piece of parchment.
"I will, I hope that we are successful in diverting the Vikings attention from your waters."
"So do I, so do I. well safe travels, till next time Colby," he says walking me to the door.
"Thank you, Toothless come on bud." I say walking out
It didn't take us long to get out and back down to the rest of the group.
"Took you long enough mate."
"Yeah, yeah, I'm here now aren't I?"
"Yeah, fine, lets get going."
I have a bit of anxiety starting to build up; I try to brush it off for now. I'll deal with it later.
And with that we leave the island bound for the southern archipelago.
It is not a long flight to the next island; we are going to an island that is close to berk so that we don't have to stay on the island. There would be nothing worse. I know of a few that should still be there, I did a map on my way leaving berk. I don't know why, I never planned on coming back so it was more or less pointless. At least it has come in handy at least this once.
"There is an island that is a few minutes away from berk that we can land on. It will provide a get away if we need one in the coming weeks."
"Sounds good mate,"
"Okay guys, fly as high as we can to avoid being spotted by anyone. We don't need to be seen before we want to be."
"K, pass the word back through the squad mates." Erland somewhat yells
"Hey, we are going to fly higher guys." Saskia yells back to the rest of the group behind us
We all go high above the lands, so we aren't seen and I start to feel the change of the feeling attached to the lands and waters. It is full of hostility and fear. Mainly for me it is the memories that I had in this part of the world, the many times that I could have ended everything, but I'm still here though.
As we fly, I take us high over the top of inhabited islands. We go over the top of the berk just to see what its like. It has been a long time since I was here and it is just as I remember it, I wish I didn't, I'd rather forget. My squad looks at me strangely as we fly over the top. They must have seen my stance change dramatically as we fly over this one particular island. They will want to know what is going on when we land.
"Guys, we are going to land on that island down here." I say pointing to an island I nicknamed ringwe-ondo, which roughly translates to stone cold in dragonese.
"Okay we'll follow mate."
"Land down in that little clearing"
It is a lot different to when I first landed on it when I was 15 but it is going to provide the necessary cover that we will require if we are going to remain hidden from the sight of people from these waters.
When I first left berk I landed here for a couple of weeks working out what I would do and calming down from what had happened, so I made a shelter. Lets hope that it is still here; we could use it for the next couple of weeks.
When we land I notice that it hasn't changed to much, but it is smaller then I remember. And vegetation was a bit more over grown. I must have grown up a bit since I was last here because it is tiny. It is big enough for what we want out of it. It has a waterfall in the middle of it and a pool of water at the bottom that forms a creek that goes down the rest of the island. There are cliffs all around us that will serve to protect us from sight. It has trees around the top with branches that form a kind of roof to the cove. And there is a large space big enough for us all with soft moss beside the creek that is good to sleep on. It is quite nice all up.
"I'm hungry" Saskia whines.
"You know how to fish don't you, Kia?"
"Yeah I do, but, but, I'm tired and I don't want to."
"Kia, you have a night fury, remember."
"Yeah what's… okay I see what your saying."
"Thought you might." Abagaile sniggers slightly
"Hey will you two finally admit your love for each other?" Achillies laughs
"We do love each other, don't we Abagaile?"
"Yeah we do."
"I thought that you loved Erland, Abb's?"
"Who said I did." Abagaile all but screams
"Oh it was just a thought." I say laughing before I get pushed into the creek.
"Well that is not very nice." Achillies laughs pushing Abagaile into the water.
"Hey guys this is meant to be a serious mission, there is no time for games we should be planning our next move."
"Oh shut up Saskia, have some fun."
"No, not when…" there was a splash followed by growling as she was pushed in by Achillies.
"Ahahahahhahahahaa, you looked so funny, Ahahahahahaa…" I think that Achillies was then pushed in by Biscuit.
"Hey guys, don't you think that we should be doing something important and planning?"
This was said by the oh so dry prince. The next thing he knew Saskia was pushing him in, He wasn't dry for long.
"That wasn't fair." He pouts
"No but it was funny."
"You should have seen your face." Abagaile and Achillies laugh
"Hey guys, don't you think that someone looks a bit dry over there?" I say
"Yeah."
"Hey Erland why has no one pushed you in yet?"
"It's cause I don't fancy getting drenched"
"Ah well that ain't good enough"
"GET HIM!" we all say at once
"No, No, no, no, NOOOO." Those were his last words as the group get out of the water and corner him at the cliff wall. Abagaile and Achillies pick up a pair of limbs each and swing him into the water.
"Well THAT'S mean."
"No, that was funny." I say killing myself with laughter.
"Hey Fury thanks for the help over here girl." All we hear from her was a dragon's way of laughing following her sticking her tongue out at him. This just prompted everyone else to laugh more and Erland to start pouting.
This is what I needed to take my mind off the bad thoughts that I have been having the last couple of days, I'm really feeling like crap because of this place. the anxiety is starting again. I have not had enough time to brief the group on what is really going to be happening. I suppose I should do that over dinner. The dragons are getting hungry they are now searching the water for any fish that we haven't scared away.
"Hey guys we should get out and build a fire for the night so that we don't freeze, girls you can change in the little hut thing if you like."
"Yeah that sounds good Colby."
"Why'd you let them go first they are going to take ages in there" Erland and Achillies complain
"Yeah I know, but ladies first, remember?"
"Yeah"
"Yeah"
"Okay well Do you 2 want to go and find some wood to start a fire so that we can start to dry the wet clothing, I'll go down stream a bit to see if I can find us some food."
"Yeah mate ok, would you like some company?"
"Nah its okay, I'll be fine. I need a bit of alone time."
"Okay mate yell if you need. We'll be up the top of the cliff's lopping some tree's" Erland eye's me off, suspicious of me slightly. Honestly he worries like a mother hen.
We walk down the stream that leads to the beach. It is good because Toothless can walk normally down it. We would fly but I just feel like taking my time today. It has been a long day. We get down to the beach and toothless motions for me to put his tail into the position where he can control it. Once I click it into place he runs towards the waves and takes off. I sit on the beach and watch for a bit. I need some time to think. I love Toothless and I vent to him a lot but I like to deal with some of these emotions myself. They can get a bit heavy for someone else to carry. I eventually start to help Toothless, we get a fare bit done.
Toothless and I spend the better part of an hour or so fishing. Toothless manages to fill up a net for the dragons to have and I fill up a basket for the group and I. we don't get to do this to often. So it's good to have some time together. He and I are starting to lose our little grove. the emotions that I have been suppressing since I found out I had to return to berk have been let lose inside my mind. It's taking its toll. I'm losing battle with them, at the moment.
I have kind of been shutting everyone out since I found out that I have to go back to berk. Even toothless, I can't deal with too much at once. Friendships just become really hard to keep up. Its like I am being held underwater struggling to breath and stay afloat. It is just so painful. It's a fear of what people will think, what they will do. And just being around them in general makes my mind go into a tizzy. How am I meant to deal with all this emotion and keep my team together? I am so not the Soldier at the moment, which I have been trained to be and have been for the past 6 years. It is driving me insane. I can't get past it. I am starting to think that I should have just ended it all when I first left. But I can't do that I cannot leave Eerika, Ada and Erick. It's just, this is too much at the moment.
Toothless nudges my side and croons loudly as if to get my attention. I am just that numb I don't feel it. I do feel him move away. I wish he didn't. I feel so lonely without him there. I hurt a lot. I can't believe that after so long berk is still making me turn into a blubbering child.
The hurt and damage is just so much to deal with sometimes. I go through periods where I'm really good for months and months and others when I am in a heap just sobbing to Toothless. I try to hide it from Eerika because I don't want her to worry or be disappointed. I have told her that I have all these issues but I still find it hard to show that kind of emotion. I guess I can blame berk for that. Shedding just one tear would earn a multitude of blows to the stomach face, arms and legs. I hate myself for not getting past that yet. I've been told it will take a while. I haven't quite stopped the cutting yet and Eerika knows that, but I have tried many times to stop. It is sometimes gets too much for me. But maybe just one cut wouldn't hurt. That would be ok. It will take away this train of thought and it will only affect me no one else will know. The sight of my arm guards on the ground along with the wraps, and the warm red liquid seeping through my skin is enough to make me start to cry. A lot.
"Hey mate you okay? You are kind of bleeding. Toothless came to get me I think he is worried about… mate what you doing that again for?"
All I do is cry more; I can't handle all this shit anymore.
"Okay mate."
He sits me down where we are standing; Toothless is right behind me so I lean up against him. Erland pulls my arm out and starts to dab the blood away with a damp cloth and then dresses it with a bandage on it and puts my regular arm guards back on to hide all the similar scars. He is stubborn, strong and doesn't show too much emotion but he knows when to put his arm around me. He pulls me into a hug like he has done on other occasions all of them when I first came to the city aldrnari modr eyland.
"I don't know if I can do this Erland, it's all coming back to me and its getting to much to handle I don't know if I can face these people."
"Don't think like that again Mate. Don't let berk rule your life again. As for the doubt in your skills, you are one of the finest guards that our kingdom has to offer; you have defeated many other enemies'. Just imagine that this is just the same as one of them. I know its not and it holds more emotion then the other missions but you can do it, I know you can."
"I know you think I can, but I really don't know if I can. Honestly how am I meant to keep this group safe if I can't think straight? I may get us all killed."
"But you won't, you know how I know mate? Because you are here and you haven't given up, if you had given up you wouldn't be here that's for sure."
"Yeah, but still. This is a bad idea."
"It probily is, but you have a group of people over there that are going to be willing to help you. We will complete this mission and after that we will be able to leave this part of the world forever. We wont ever have to come back."
"I really hope not."
"We won't, but right now lets go back to the camp and eat so that we can all have a good nights sleep."
"Okay. But can we stay here for a little while? I want a bit of time to gather my thoughts."
"Yeah mate that's all good"
While I had my episode Fury had curled herself around toothless to comfort him. I must have scared him a lot because I haven't had an attack nearly as big as that since just leaving berk the last time. I feel sorry for him because he can't do anything but watch and be near me because trying to stop it makes it worse.
~~~Abagaile's PoV ~~~
That is the most relaxed I have seen Colby all this mission, I mean I know that when your on a mission your not relaxed as in totally bliss happy, you are more so relaxed as you know what you are doing. Colby has been really up tight the whole mission. He must have had something happen prior to coming here for him to be acting like this. I know him to be the most fearless person. But he is completely different at the moment. He seems to be acting really anxious about something; it has been really bad since we arrived into this part of the world.
"Hey Abagaile, what are these markings?"
"I don't know Kia. You will probily have to ask Colby when we are finished in here."
Kia has found all these, what looks to be bits of letters in another language. There are also similar markings on the walls as well as many, many X's.
"I wander what they mean Kia, I wonder if Colby made them. He said he stayed on this particular island before."
"That probily means he does know."
"You sound very happy bout that."
"Well yeah I may get to learn a new language!"
"Okay, we'll see about that."
"Come on we have been in here a while the boys will want to be changing if they haven't already."
"Yeah I guess so, the dragons are probily going to be hungry as well"
"Yeah."
Just as we are leaving the hut we see toothless flying over to Erland who is on the top of the cliff, he is barking and making all sorts of noises trying to get his attention. Fury must have picked up on toothless' distress because she is at Erland's side almost immediately. There is only one reason that would make toothless that distressed and it is that Colby is in some sort of trouble.
We all run to our night fury's
"Guys stand down, I'll handle this one. If you are needed I will send Fury to get you guys."
"But Erland, what if you need back up straight away?" Saskia asks
"I think I'll be okay Kia." He looks at us with a soft expression
And with that he Forces Fury into an all out bold straight away. That tells me he thinks it serious. You don't get a night fury to do that unless absolutely necessary because it drains their energy really fast.
It is over an hour before Erland comes back with a slightly shaken up Colby. I want to go over and see if he's ok but I don't want to make anything worse for him by doing that. I kind of wish I knew what was going on because I would know how to help him then.
"Do you think we should ask him if he's ok?" I barely hear Kia ask me
"No I don't think so, it might upset him again."
"Yeah your probily right"
"But what we should do is go and get the food ready for the group, that big net of fish that Erland and fury have brought back with them"
~~~Hiccup's PoV~~~
I feel a bit awkward coming back to camp. Everyone is watching us. I try to act as normal as I can. I can see that Kia and Abagaile are walking over to the net of fish. Likely because they are hungry. We were away for a while.
"Hey mates we bring food, sorry it's late it tried to run away."
"More like you tried to run away with it." Saskia states matter of factly.
"Maybe…"
"Well lets eat anyways, cause I'm starving"
I feel slightly guilty about that because it's my fault that we are eating this late. No one seems to question it too much so we just set the fish over the fire so that we can eat it, the dragons just dig into the rest of the net. They seem to be enjoying themselves at least.
Us people sit around a fire that Abagaile and Saskia have built in the time that we were away. They made a stake that we can put the fish on it and cook them. It is a good set up. In training we were taught to make a fire last all night with the least amount of smoke possible.
"Hey so guys I'm going to tell you guys why I'm a bit on edge and how I knew this place was here…"
"You know Colby, you don't need to tell us. I mean if you don't want to."
"Yeah we trust you and you judgement of things" Abagaile and Kia say.
"I know but I think that you guys need to know because it might end up endangering you or confusing you. If you don't know"
"Okay, well if you really want to." Saskia says.
"Yeah mate, it may not be a great idea"
"No I just got the courage up to do this, I have to otherwise I might not ever."
"Ok mate take your time. I don't want to have to run after you" Erland mutters the last part under his breath knowing only I could hear him.
"Yeah I will." I say this knowing full well that I am likely going to want to die of embarrassment or something like that after telling everyone.
"So I guess that I should start with my father is the Chief of this village. So I, in theory am the heir of that clan. So that might mean that they will try and get me to stay. Which may end up causing us a bit of a problem. But I was also a runt in their eyes cause I was quite small, which was a big issue within the clan because how can someone so small and meaningless be useful.
I mean its not like I didn't try to be like everyone else. I really did try. But it just didn't ever work in my favour. I lit the town on fire a couple times because a dragon was chasing me, I injured many people trying to help with my inventions and I killed my mother. A dragon carried her off because I was making to much noise as a young child. The dragon broke into our house and took her as she was trying to protect me.
"Mate you can't be blamed for that, that was never your fault."
Yeah K, but anyway as you can tell wasn't the greatest person to be around and I had a lot of negative feelings. A lot. So I started to get what I now know as depressed and anxious about the age of 10, this was also when the bullying started to ramp up because people my age were able to make opinions of there own. That was bad because they where never nice to begin with.
To start with it was not to bad it was all verbal which made it tolerable, my cousin was the leader of the group. They would say things like useless, nutsy moron, fuck face, shit head, idiot, and a few others that I don't remember. That was okay for a while, you get used to it after a bit, but then they upped the anti, they would throw in a couple of slaps to begin with and then it escalated all the way up to full on beatings when I would be unconscious for hours. The last time it happened I think I was out for a day.
"Colby why did you never ask for help, surely there was someone."
"No I didn't really, they all hated me to much."
"Oh, well keep going I feel like your not finished."
"Okay well after it started to get more physical the insults where more violent and cruel. I got severely depressed and self hate was becoming more of a thing. It was not helping that my father was constantly favouring my cousin more and more. It made my life hell. It was one more thing Snotlout could hold over my head. It was like my father was training him to be the chief. In truth he probably was. But as it got worse I turned to self harm which became a thing necessary to my daily life. Without it I went crazy with feelings of fear and not being able to feel anything at all, it was horrible. It was not until I started living at fire Fury Island that I completely stopped the self-harm. Even then it was not till I started to alleviate some of the anger and hurt that I started to stop. But yeah it still affects me now so if you see me wanting to run it most likely is cause I really really want to. But at least now you know the reason why." I was right I feel quite awkward now, I wasn't paying attention to everyone staring through that but know I'm aware.
"Well as you say, at least we know so we can somewhat protect you from them. If you need an out we will try to get you one."
"I know you will but I also need to hold it together because I have a things that I need to do."
"So now mate that you have covered that for us I think we should get ready to hit the sack. We have a pretty big day tomorrow."
I could not agree more. I am so tired from today I think that I might have a mental episode. Well another one.
"Yes I need some beauty sleep." Achillies says in what I call posh sarcasm.
"Okay well Kia and I are going to camp in the hut." Abagaile claims. While she and Kia run off to the hut.
"Okay well I guess we are outside." Ehsan says quietly like he doesn't want to be noticed.
"Yep we are. So find a good spot I'm sure the dragons will be glad for the rest as they have finished eating now."
"Okay well I'm taken the watch up first and Achillies mate, you are next see you in 3 hours." Erland says
"Okay, I guess night in that case."
And with that people started to find their spot to rest
