This has been reposted cause I'm trash and didn't realize it hadn't posted right until today. Sorry guys.
Chapter 3
Carol found him outside after she had gotten cleaned up. She had waited with Michonne and Maggie, after the men had finished. Although knowing Daryl, he had just pretended to do so and escaped as soon as possible. It wasn't like he didn't wash, because he did. He just didn't like the idea of people catching him in a compromising position, which was why, since he had started to use her ensuite, he had stopped avoiding showering as much as he had before. She loved him no matter how he smelled, though.
"Hey," Carol murmured as she knocked her knee against Daryl's side, before moving to sit beside him in the shade at the side of the house. He grunted a greeting, shifting to the side a little to make room for her to join him. She sat there beside him and watched in silence, just as he had been doing.
"There are fewer people than back home," he said, and Carol tried not to smile as he called Alexandria 'home. ."And fewer kiddies too."
"The place seems easier to protect too."
Daryl made a noise of agreement, his blue eyes observing closely. Looking for things out of place, for weakness. "That prick was right though, there ain't many fighters."
"They're vulnerable, that's why they need the ammo," she said, to which he nodded in answer. "It will probably come down to who needs what the most; them the ammo, or us the food."
"We would have had food if that asshole hadn't fucked it all up."
Carol patted his shoulder, trying not to rile him up against Jesus once again. She knew Daryl, and it was going to take him some time to trust their newest acquaintance.
Rick opened the door and whistled at them, breaking their little moment. What waited for them inside, wasn't good news at all.
Gregory had said no, and that took them back to square one. She saw Daryl's shoulders drop in defeat as Rick accepted Jesus' proposal, and she wanted to comfort him. He still felt guilty about the food lost the day before; she knew his mind and how it worked. In his mind, everything was his responsibility, and every failure was his failure alone.
The arrival of the missing party broke their little meeting. And everything went to shit after that.
As Carol stood in the middle of the yard, looking at Rick covered in blood pointing his gun at Jesus' head, she wondered if their leader had really come back from it all. She had been worrying so much about what she had had to do to stay safe, to keep her family safe, that she had blocked what everyone else had needed to do.
Rick could have stopped the man without killing him, but he had seen no other way out. Seeing that, was a sobering moment for her. She wasn't like that, every man she had needed to kill, every woman; had been because there was no other choice. There wasn't.
It wasn't like Rick enjoyed it, but he was sure as hell freer with his killing than she could ever be. She never wanted to get to that point. And she knew she wouldn't; she would first leave them all behind rather than forget that life is precious. Precious enough to kill those that truly threatened, but precious in the end.
"You okay?" Daryl asked her softly, as the people around them moved to help the injured. Carol nodded sharply, her eyes still on the dead man on the ground, on the woman crying over him. "Hey..." Daryl's hand touched hers, and she finally moved her eyes to his, "you okay?"
"Got to be."
He scoffed at her answer, squeezing her hand softly before he moved away to help Abraham up. He was back at her side sooner than she expected. "The crazy son of a bitch is fucking laughing, as if he hadn't been about to fucking die."
"To each his own, Pookie, to each his own."
In the end, they had a deal. They were going to take on this group, The Saviors, and because of that the Hilltop would give them enough food for the time being. Food and "one of them cows," as Daryl put it. Carol helped carry the supplies they were given, as Daryl went off to get the man who would take them to Negan's compound.
She would have to talk to him later; not right then, but later. She had a really bad feeling about the whole thing, and she just wanted to run it by him.
"Did you ask for the cow for me?" Carol teased Daryl as he dropped on the bench beside her, chuckling as he avoided her eyes. "You didn't have to."
Daryl rolled his eyes, as he picked at the hole on the knee of his pants. "Are you sure you're up to this?" They had talked about it, about her guilt over what had happened, about what she'd had to do for their family. What they had all had to do.
His voice was low, and he looked around before he moved nearer to her, an arm over the back of the seat, allowing her to be closer. This was something between them. No one else's opinions mattered but theirs.
"As you said—" Carol swatted the hand that was making the hole in his knee bigger with his fidgeting, before moving to grip his hand tightly, "—sometimes killing is the only option, and our family has to survive. You have to survive."
His head was ducked, so when she looked up his blue eyes were right there. There was barely any space between them, and she knew that if she moved to close that space, he would let her. "We have to survive." His whispered words made her shudder, and her breathing quicken. She felt, more than saw because they were so close, as she started to move forward.
The sound of Rick slamming the RV's door closed made the two of them aware of where they were sitting. And both looked away, blushing.
Carol noticed that he didn't put his arm down, allowing her to settle better against his side as they started to move. She watched with a smile on her face as Glenn looked in wonder at the sonogram in his hand; he looked utterly mesmerized.
It wasn't until Michonne passed the picture to Daryl, who moved it so she could see it too that she noticed that his arm had left the back of the bench and was now around her shoulders. He knew what seeing the picture in his hand would do to her, and in his own little way he let her know he understood, and that he was there.
"That's the baby," Carol said softly and only for him as she traced the small shade on the picture. "It's really small right now, and it looks more like a bean than a baby, but that's Maggie and Glenn's baby." Her voice broke at the last word, and she felt as he hugged her closer to him. Her eyes met Maggie's and they shared a smile.
She turned and laid her head against his chest, and the sound of his strong heartbeat under her ear lulled her to sleep. They had a lot of work to do, but for now, they were safe and together. And nothing could touch them as long as things stayed that way.
-.-.-.
Daryl glared at Glenn when he wiggled his eyebrows at him, as they both had their women sleeping against them on the way back The smirk on Glenn's face meant trouble, meant he was going to get teased by the younger man until he couldn't take it anymore. But he was done running, he was done letting things like embarrassment and their past hold them back. He was not willing to go back to the place they had been before, he was not going to give her up. Not for anything.
Daryl watched as Glenn woke Maggie up, and tried to look like he wasn't following his example as he woke Carol up.
"I want you to pass the word around, I want everyone to meet us in the church in an hour," Rick said from the front, looking over his shoulder at them as he waited for the gates to be opened. "We're letting everyone know of the plan, so you all know what to do."
Since they were living in the same house as Rick, they were the last ones to be dropped off. The mood was contemplative, no one saying much as they scattered around to get changed and get ready. They were going to war.
When Daryl came down again, he found the house empty. There was no Judith babbling away, no Carl and his damned ball, not even Michonne and Rick being a pain in his ass. And there was no Carol either.
They had left early that morning, which had disrupted their routines. And there was one routine he knew Carol stood by. Not a day passed that she didn't visit Sam's grave. There was a sense of urgency on those visits too, as if the boy would miss her if she didn't visit. He hurried his pace as he saw Morgan walk through the trees which led them to the cemetery.
He stopped for a moment as he heard Carol saying something too low for him to hear from where he was standing, followed closely by Morgan raising his voice enough for it to travel to him.
"Why didn't you tell Rick?"
Daryl growled as he overheard Morgan daring to ask that to Carol, and appeared suddenly behind him. "Because you forget, she told me."
He was expecting Morgan's reaction, so he ducked in time to let the surprised man's staff fly over his head before he pushed him with all his strength. Daryl's chest was heaving as he sneered down at the man in front of him, "I thought I had made it very clear? You don't talk to her, you don't look at her, you don't even dare to breathe around her."
Morgan stood up, using his staff as support to do so. He refused to look at Daryl, who took a step to the side to keep himself between Morgan and Carol, not even letting him look at her. Morgan looked away, nodding before turning on his heel and leaving.
Daryl took a deep breath, tightening his fists to try and get his hands to stop shaking as he forced himself to calm down. He didn't want her to see him like this, even though she had seen him like this millions of times by now. She was still dealing with everything, and she didn't deserve to have to deal with his bad temper too.
Carol chuckled softly when Daryl startled as she ran her hand down his arm, to his closed fist. Her small hand—so fragile looking beside his thicker ones—covered his fist, feeling as he started to relax his grip as the seconds passed.
"What did he say?" Daryl turned, opening his hand until he was able to clasp her hand in his; as they both looked down at Sam's grave, at the cookie on top of it that she took the care to place every week.
"Not much, you got here in time." Carol started walking away from the gravesite, and towards the church. "My hero."
Daryl chuckled, shaking his head as he did so. "Stop."
-.-.
Rick nodded to them as they walked in, taking a seat in the second row in front of Tara and Denise. Carol patted Daryl's thigh as he sprawled down on the bench, rolling her eyes when he sprawled even more.
The door closed behind the last person in—Morgan—to whom Daryl mock saluted. Rick started his spiel; that they had gone to the new community, and had made a deal. The deal could potentially kill them, but so would not actually making it because they had no food. And Rick was right, these "Saviors" would come for them, sooner or later.
Carol felt Daryl tense up as Rick asked for objections; she could feel his hand, which was resting behind her on the bench, move slightly so he could touch her back, as if reminding himself that even after everything Morgan had done to her, she was still there with him. They both knew Morgan was going to object, but yet Carol couldn't help but grip Daryl's thigh as they all heard him stand up in the back.
Daryl turned to glare at Morgan, but Carol kept her eyes up front. Jesus gave her a small smile which she returned. Daryl might want to sock that man often, but he didn't seem all that bad in her books. He was at least reasonable.
"You're sure we can do it? That we can beat them?" Morgan asked behind her and Carol refused to turn to look at him. Daryl seemed ready to stand and go beat him up again; she could tell from just how tense he was.
"What this group has done, what we've learned, what we've become—" Carol dropped her head as Rick continued to talk, closing her eyes tightly as unwanted memories started to flash in front of her eyes.
Seeing Sophia walk out of that barn. Mika's dead body on the grass. Lizzie crying as she pointed a gun to the back of her head. Sam's tiny arms around her waist as he tried to hide from his father. Blowing up Terminus. Watching as the wolves killed their neighbors, killing without stopping to think of anything else. It all came back at once.
"—all of us? Yes, I'm sure." Rick finished,
Morgan said something in response to Rick, but she wasn't listening anymore. Her chest felt tight and she wasn't sure if she could continue to draw breath. "You need to breathe," Daryl murmured into her ear. She felt him gripping her hand as his chest was plastered to her side. He was trying not to bring attention to them, failing fantastically when he noticed that Jesus was looking at them with worry. "I'm here." He rested the side of his face against the crown of her head, closing his eyes and trying to breathe slowly once he noticed she was trying to copy him.
"Sorry," Carol whispered as she moved back a little, raising her face and giving him a sad smile. Daryl didn't say anything, just rolled his eyes at her. She did notice though, that he was sitting a little straighter, and his arm was still around her shoulders.
It was Morgan's next words that seemed to break the spell completely. "They always come back."
"We'll take care of the walkers," Rick said dismissively.
"I'm not talking about the walkers."
The only sound in the room was of Carol's heavy breathing. Daryl started to stand up the moment she did, but the hand on his shoulder stopped him. As he looked up at Carol, he could see her strength, but also her pain. And his chest clenched at the amount of both he saw in her.
"You're wrong, Morgan," Carol said as she turned to look at him, "you have been wrong since you got here, and the worst part is that you don't want to see it."
"Killing is not the answer."
"What would have happened, if your mistake, if your stubbornness had killed Denise that night? Would you carry Carl's life in your hands? Would you take responsibility for that?"
"Carol?" Rick asked, as he took a step closer to where she was standing, stopping only at the look she gave him.
"We don't have to do this, Carol." Morgan said raising his voice. "You don't like doing it, there's no need to do it."
"That's where you are wrong," Carol's voice shook, as tears broke her words. "We have to do it. It's true, I don't like doing it, and I wish we didn't have to. But there are times—like the wolves— when there's no other option."
"These people haven't done anything to us yet!"
"Yes they have!" Everyone jumped as they heard Carol raise her voice, for some of them this being the first time they had ever heard her scream at anyone. "They already have! They tried to take Daryl, and Sasha, and Abraham from us! They would have killed them!"
"You don't know that!"
"Abe?" Abraham seemed to sit up straighter as Carol's eyes and attention turned to him, "Please tell Morgan what the man you met on the road told you, verbatim if you can."
"I would rather not, ma'am—" Abraham gave Carol a pointed look "—ladies present and all."
"A summary then, we need our friend here to get an idea of what's happening out there." Carol had turned to look again at Morgan, her eyes cold.
"Said they introduce themselves by killing someone from the community—"
"That's what they did to us, killed a sixteen year old boy without provocation," Jesus interrupted, getting a nod as a 'thank you' from Carol.
"And that we needed to take them back to where we came from. When we started trying to come to an arrangement they pulled their guns on us, and if it hadn't been for this crazy redneck son of a bitch and his motherfucking rocket launcher, we would have never made it back." Abraham looked at Carol. "Ma'am."
"Thank you, Abraham." Carol took a deep breath, letting her eyes linger on the people around them, on Rick, before returning to Morgan. "I don't enjoy killing. And, yes, there are cases where it can be avoided. But people like that? People that associate with men who beat a sixteen year old child to death with a baseball bat? Just to make a point? Those people do not deserve the benefit of the doubt."
Morgan swallowed heavily as he looked down, before sitting at once. Carol was breathing hard again, as she moved to sit down beside Daryl once more. Her heart was racing, and her hands were shaking. Yet it felt like she had lifted a weight off her chest by doing that, and she knew there were going to be more questions than before, but she had gotten that out of the way.
No man would ever have that type of power over her.
"Carol is right," Rick added after clearing his throat to try and dissipate the uncomfortable silence which had befallen them. "These type of people are not going to negotiate with us, so the idea is that we hit them first, and we hit them hard. But we have to make this decision together. Who else thinks we should talk to the Saviors first?"
Daryl glared at Aaron as he suddenly stood up, as if daring him to speak against Carol, his Carol. Aaron shook his head at him, before turning to look at Rick. "What happened here, we won't let that happen again." He turned to look at Daryl and Carol, acknowledging them both. "If it hadn't been for Carol's quick thinking, there wouldn't have been a community to get back to, so I'm not going to let that happen again. I won't."
Aaron gave Daryl a small smile and a nod which he returned. His partner was on their side, and that was something Daryl would not forget anytime soon. Having friends other than his family was something new for him, and he was learning every day. But he was glad he had Aaron in his life, that he had Eric as well.
"Seems like it's settled," Rick's eyes never left Morgan's. "We know what this is. We don't shy from it, we live. We don't all have to kill—" Daryl found Carol's hand, entwining their fingers "—but those that are staying here, they have to accept it."
The doors slammed behind Rick as he made his dramatic exit. The sound of voices started to be heard as people began to move out of the church. There were things to plan, people to see. Yet Carol and Daryl didn't make a move.
Jesus was one of the last to leave, the sound of the door closing behind him echoing around the two of them.
"Proud of you," Daryl murmured, voice still soft, low, even if they were the only two people left. "That asshole needs to keep his mouth shut, if he's not willing to lose a couple of teeth the next time."
"Don't fight because of me," Carol answered, her eyes on the cross at the back of the church. "Not worth it."
Daryl snorted, shaking his head as he started to get up. "Not worth it," he mumbled to himself chuckling at the stupidity of the words, as he moved out of the pew and towards the middle aisle. Carol didn't move though, she continued to look at the cross, nothing but sadness visible in her face right then.
"C'mon," he murmured as he stood looking down at her, just before he extended his hand to her. "It's getting late, we need to get ready for tomorrow."
When Carol didn't move, Daryl didn't either. She seemed lost in her thoughts, the fierceness she had showed when she had stood up and talked Morgan down, seemed to have disappeared completely behind the sadness and hopelessness that poured out of her.
"Hey," Daryl said as he finally moved to sit next to her again, "talk to me." It had taken time, two months of fighting against each other, and against themselves, to get to where they were right then. They both had lived hard lives, and they both had learned the worst way possible that opening up, letting people in, caused pain.
But this time around, after he had found her that night two months ago, he had bulldozed his way through her walls and hadn't allowed her to erect them with him on the other side. He was on her side, and always would be. And if she needed to talk, then he would listen.
"We're going to kill them." There was no doubt in her words, but they were not devoid of emotion. It was then he noticed silent tears were running down her cheeks. He didn't move to cradle her into his arms as he itched to do; he just continued to sit beside her, shoulder to shoulder, thigh to thigh. She wasn't breaking down, she was standing strong. And he would stand strong beside her as long as she allowed him to.
"We are."
Carol sighed at his answer. She knew it needed to happen, but that didn't mean all the years where religion was ingrained into her head didn't play games with her. She didn't enjoy it; she didn't like killing. But she knew it was needed.
"You can stay here," Daryl murmured as he looked down, at where his hands were resting against his knees. His right knee started to bounce nervously, unable to raise his eyes to look at Carol. "You don't have to."
"And leave you to get your crazy but cute redneck ass into trouble? Think again, Dixon."
Daryl snorted, finally raising his head to find her looking at him, a smirk on his face. He knew he was probably ten different shades of red by then, but he just shook his head. "As if you're any better."
The side of her mouth dropped, and she sighed just before dropping her forehead against his shoulder. "I can do this, I have to."
"You don't have to. You don't." He repeated his words from before, and for him they were true. She had done enough for one lifetime, and if she wanted to stay safe here taking care of Judith and Carl? He would make sure she was able to.
"Where you go, I go, that simple." Her hand had moved to grip his tightly and when he turned to look at her, he suddenly found her face to be closer than he expected. "Daryl-"
"Daryl! Rick needs you!"
Carol groaned, laughing as she dropped her forehead against Daryl's shoulder once again. "For fucks sake," Daryl muttered against the top of her head as they heard Glenn yelling for him. "It's like he's doing it on purpose."
"Did you have any plans, Dixon?" Carol was still chuckling as she stood up. The smile on her face making him almost break into one. Her eyes were still red from crying, her face blotchy, tear tracks still on her cheeks. And yet, she was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.
"One of this days, I'm gonna do the same to him." Carol barked out a laugh as she heard Daryl's muttered words, still laughing as she moved past him and out of the church, certain he was coming with her. There was no doubt on that.
