I can't believe this.

This isn't happening.

My sister isn't gone.

She wouldn't leave me.

Except she did.

The mascara stains my cheeks, flowing down with the aid of my tears. They haven't stopped since I heard.

For as long as I live, I will never forget this day.

Beck called me late tonight, screaming and crying. The only words I could make out were 'Jade' and 'hospital.'

I fled to hospital, walking in to see Beck screaming at a doctor, tears streaming down his face. He stopped talking long enough for me to hear the doctor stutter out, "I'm sorry Mr. Oliver, she's gone."

And from that point on I knew my life would never be the same.

I'm too depressed to even pretend to be my normal, perky self right now.

I can't believe she left me.

Her life sucked, no doubt about it, but mine did too. That's why we worked so well. We helped fill the hole in each other's lives that was left gaping open from parental neglect.

She promised we'd always stick together, that'd no matter what we'd be together.

And she broke that this morning.

After me and Beck realized screaming at doctors wouldn't bring her back, we went to her house. Why, I'll never know, because the pain it inflected will be never ending.

We took a look around, glancing at pictures she had spread throughout her room. I went into her closet, where I knew she kept all her personal things, and I swear I could smell her.

I couldn't take anymore. I hugged Beck goodbye and practically sprinted from the room. I think he's still there now, I'm not sure, and I know he said he was going to call the others, but who knows when he'll pull himself together enough to do that.

I wanted nothing more than to be in Jade's arms right now. It was always the safest place for me.

A whole new set of tears began to fall as I realized that'd never happen again.

I walked down to a park Jade and I used to go to as kids. We'd spend hours here; pretending life didn't suck at home.

I walked and sat down on one of the swings. The moon casting an eerie glow on the park. I slowly rocked back and forth, before reaching into my back pocket and pulling out the wrinkled paper.

My Beautiful Catarina,

Honey, I'm so sorry.

I know I promised I'd never leave you, and believe me the guilt is eating me alive, but I just couldn't live through another day.

The pain was excruciating, Cat. My whole life was turned upside down and the pain got worse each and every day. I wasn't strong enough to last.

Cat, you know how much I love you. You know you were like a sister to me. And you know that I will forever love you, and treasure our friendship.

I miss you, Cat.

I would give anything to see you just one last time.

I feel so horrible leaving you like this, but I knew this was going to happen sooner or later, and I think you knew that too.

I want you to be strong, Rina.

Don't waste your tears on me, it's not worth it.

I'll see you again someday.

I want you to be as strong as I know you can be, Cat. You're going to be okay, and I know it probably stings now, but it'll recede and things will fall back into place until I'm just a distant memory of what used to be.

I'll soon be forgotten and everyone will resume their lives, and I hope I become just a memory; you all deserve to live a happy life, not one full of grieving and loss.

Take care of yourself, Rina.

Be safe, and be smart and know when things seem tough, I'm doing all I can to take the pain away.

I don't know if I believe in ghosts, or know what the hell is going to happen after I take these pills, but I do know I'm gonna try to keep you in my life.

I'll always watch over you, Cat. I'll be watching and hoping everything works out for you and praying to God you live a long and happy life.

Beck was the highlight of my life, Cat. Do me a favor and work things out with Robbie. I know he loves you, and you clearly love him too.

You deserve love, Cat.

I'm not quite sure what to say know, but I know I'm stalling just a bit.

You know, I was so sure I wanted to do this, and now that I'm saying goodbye and I'm staring at the bottle of pills, it makes it so much more real, and to be honest, I'm scared, Cat.

I don't know where I'm going and what is going to happen.

But I have to get out of here, Rina. And this is the only way out.

Be careful, look out for yourself, be smart, and know I will be keeping you in my thoughts.

Where you always have been.

I miss you, darling, so much.

I want so much to pull you into my arms and never let go, and take you with me, but I know that can't happen.

I love you, Rina. I always will.

Please don't cry, the sight of your tears always breaks my heart.

All the love in my heart,

Jadey

Oh my god.

Every time I read this my heart skips a beat.

I know I should be strong, and I know I should do what Jade said, but I just can't.

Not with something this severe.

Jade, I need you.

Please come back.

I love you.

I always will.

A/N: Alright that was a suckish way to end chapter three, but oh well.

Sorry if I disappointed anyone…

And this is wayyyyy OOC, my bad.

Ummmm… well that was chapter three. And for those of you who didn't understand the whole 'Rina' thing. I got it from Catarina. Get it? Haha sorry, I thought it was cute.

This chapter is a lot longer than Beck's and for that I apologize, I just love the Jade/Cat friendship.

So yes, same as before, review with what you thought, who you want to be next, and what Jade should confess to them.

Okay I'll stop rambling now.

Please Review!

-LoveLikeYou'reNotBroken