The lights were all on around Amelia's house as we pulled up in Tess's red mustang. I could hear MGMT blasting from inside and from the amount of empty beer cans already on the front lawn I could tell that it was going to be a messy night for quite of few of my peers.

"If I get puked on, you owe me seven uninterrupted hours of Wolverine ogling," I scowled at Tess as I slammed the car door shut, but she just laughed and tossed her dark hair over her shoulder.

"Caitlyn, relax. Just focus on what a great week we've had and how much fun is still to come."

She had a point. After our music project performance we weren't alone at lunchtime anymore. Amelia had joined us at our table, along with two girls from her soccer team, Ellen and Jemima, her boyfriend John, and his friend Michael. And though we were sceptical at first, we learned that Amelia and John were the sweetest couple in the school, Ellen was hilarious, and Jemima and Michael had sexual tension so thick you could slice right through it, but were in such denial that they constantly bickered with each other. And our common factor was that we all loathed Whitney.

She had cheated on Michael with half the basketball team last year, broken Ellen's guitar before a talent show that she ended up winning, surprise surprise, and she seemed to torment Jemima nearly as much as Tess because of her non-existent relationship with Michael. Just because she'd broken his heart apparently didn't mean she could stand to see another girl in his arms. They only people she seemingly couldn't touch were Amelia and John, because they kept themselves moving so fast in their lives that she couldn't catch them. And they didn't plan on slowing down. I could see what Tess had meant about her not being nearly as bad at Camp Rock. Whitney was every teenage girl's worst nightmare. Generically pretty, rich, averagely talented and ruthlessly cut-throat.

"Why do we let people like that control our lives?" I burst out angrily earlier that day, after Whitney had purposely spilt a bottle of water in Jemima's purse and walked away before she noticed.

"If we fight back, she'd only come at us ten times worse," Jemima sighed, shaking her waterlogged cell phone sadly. "She's too clever, too powerful, and I don't want to waste my time on stupid, harebrained schemes destined to fail when I could be doing something more useful with my life. Nobody wants to bother with petty revenge, because that would only make us as bad as her."

"So she just gets away with it?" I grimace, reluctantly agreeing with her analysis.

"Two more years and she'll be out in the real world," Jemima shrugged. "Maybe she'll get what's coming to her then. But knowing her, she'll probably worm her way into a record deal with her father's label and become even more unbearable. But at least then we won't be the ones who have to deal with her."

"I just wish someone would teach her a lesson," I growled, helping her air out all her drenched belongings.

"Oh yeah? Who would do that, you? Don't get me wrong, Caitlyn you're a great girl, and it's nice to see you can stand up for yourself, but it's not worth it. She wouldn't learn any lesson. She's like Blair Waldorf, except she'll actually get into Yale."

"Whaaat?" I raised my eyebrows.

"Oh right, sorry, I forgot you gave up on Gossip Girl after they busted up the Nate and Jenny storyline," Jemima rolled her eyes.

"The writers are so inconsistent! I couldn't deal with their flip-flopping anymore!" I retorted defensively.

"I know, I know," Jemima laughed. "But seriously, Whitney is like an angry lioness. If you poke her, she'll pounce, claw you to pieces and eat you for dinner."

"What a wonderful mental image," I giggled, picturing Whitney with big pointy teeth and whiskers.

"It's not worth it, Caitlyn," Jemima warned me, pulling her soggy purse out of my hands.

"Yeah, okay, don't worry, Mim," I grumbled. "I get it. Blair Waldorf slash lioness. Do not mess."

"Amen," she nodded, throwing her stuff in her locker and slamming it shut. "See you tonight."


"Jesus, why is Whitney here already?" Michael grumbled from behind me, nodding towards a sleek white Audi. "I would have thought Amelia's party would be beneath her."

"Not when every jock in the school is guaranteed to show up for the beer keg," Ellen rolled her eyes and patted him on the shoulder when he winced at the memory of her infidelity.

"Chill out guys, we're here to have a good time," Tess chirped as we walked into the front hall.

"Shit, there she is," Michael gasped as she came into his line of vision, and he ducked down behind Ellen.

"Oh, will you grow a pair?" Ellen snapped. "Just ignore her. She's not going to do anything with so many people around, you know she doesn't operate like that. Look, here's Mim, go with her to get a drink and show her that you've moved on."

"Who's moved on?" Jemima piped up as she slipped through the crowd of drinking teenagers towards us.

"Michael's still shit-scared of Whitney," Ellen grinned.

"I'm not scared," Michael yelped, straightening to his full height. "Come on, Jemima, we're getting a drink."

Jemima couldn't hide the smile that flitted across her lips as Michael grabbed her hand and dragged her towards the kitchen, giving a passing wave to Amelia and John who were attached at the mouth in the living room.

"We should go say hi to the lovebirds," Ellen grinned, making her way over to them, Tess and I following, and we both laughed as she vaulted over the back of the couch and made them break apart in shock as she plonked down beside them and screamed "HEY GUYS!" in their ears.

I drifted past Amelia scolding Ellen as Tess sat down next to them, and called after me if I could get her a grape soda. I nodded and made my way over to the cooler on the kitchen bench, in front of where Michael and Jemima were arguing.

"It's spelt D-E-F-I-N-I-T-E-L-Y!" Jemima huffed crossly.

"No, it's not! There's no second E!" Michael insisted. "Why do you always have to be right about everything?"

"Why do you always have to think you're right about everything when you're clearly wrong?" Jemima replied smarmily.

"Can one of you please pass me two grape sodas before you kill each other?" I cut in. "And Jemima spelt it correctly."

Jemima sent me a satisfied grin and handed me two chilly cans, while Michael moaned exaggeratedly. "Don't encourage her, Caitlyn."

"Admit it, I'm just better than you," Jemima smiled sweetly at him. "I want you to say 'Jemima Beckett is Queen of the dictionary and of life. I will never live up to her amazing cornucopia of knowledge and she is so pretty and an amazing soccer player and she is the best saxophonist at Frenchwood Academy…'"

Jemima's list of demands continued on and on, but Michael had stopped listening because his gaze had darted to something behind me and before I knew it a mixture of defiance and resentment had passed over his features and he'd looked back to Jemima and her babbling for two seconds before cupping her face in his hand and kissing her roughly.

She gave a squeak of surprise before her eyes fluttered closed and she sunk forward, her hands balling his shirt into her fists. But then Michael broke away at the sound of a high-pitched giggle that emanated from the same place that spurred his actions in the first place. I turned around to come face to face with Whitney and her two cronies. She had her eyebrow raised at the pair in a condescending smirk, and my sights flitted back to the betrayed look of realisation on Jemima's face before she slapped Michael across the face and stormed up the stairs in a flood of tears.

"Mim, wait! Jemima!" Michael called desperately after her, but all he got in return was the loud slamming of a door.

Whitney didn't say anything. She just breezed between us like an ice queen, picking up a cup of punch before winking at Michael and sauntering away, her followers cackling in her wake.

"You idiot!" I hissed, smacking Michael upside the head. "Why would you do that?"

"She… she… I thought she liked me. Everyone's been telling me that she likes me," he stared blankly at the stairs that Jemima had disappeared up moments earlier.

"She does like you, fool!" I groaned. "And she thought you liked her!"

"I do like her! I like her a lot!" Michael gaped at me.

"Well, you've got a really good way of showing it! How could you use her like that in front of Whitney! You're a complete idiot!" I reiterated.

"I don't know what happened," he mumbled detachedly, like he couldn't really understand what was going on. "I just saw Whitney and something snapped. Like she gives Mim all this crap because she wants her to stay away from me, because when it comes down to it, she's a selfish slut who just wants me to still want her. I had to show her that she was wrong, I could never want her, and I was really happy with someone else."

"Oh yeah, you sure showed her, genius," I rolled my eyes. "You just played her dumb game, and she won knowing that Jemima's somewhere upstairs bawling her eyes out because she thinks you used her to make Whitney jealous."

Michael's face paled as the gravity of the situation came crashing down on him. "Oh. Oh no. Does she even have any idea how long I've been waiting to kiss her like that?"

"Not now, because you blew it without telling her how you feel," I shook my head and ran my fingers through my hair because I was completely at a loss for what else to do.

"Oh god, no. No, I've got to explain," Michael frantically gawped at me.

"What are you looking at me for?" I asked incredulously.

"You're right," he blurted, turning on his heel and sprinting up the stairs after Jemima.

I just shook my head sadly and wandered back to the others, handing Tess her now lukewarm soda.

"What took you so long?" she joked, pulling the aluminium can out of my cold, sticky fingers, the smooth warmth of her hand a stark contrast to my own.

"Michael kissed Jemima," I informed her, also gaining the attention of Ellen, Amelia and John, who looked delighted, "in front of Whitney."

"Oh, no," Ellen gasped, echoed by Tess and Amelia, as John smacked his forehead. "Idiot!"

"My words exactly," I nodded. "She's upstairs, crying. I think Michael's trying to find her to explain that she actually means more to him than a jealousy front."

"Come on, we should go and find them," Ellen stood up and brushed pizza crumbs off her stomach. "I think it's time for some ass-whooping."

One hour later and we still hadn't found Jemima. Michael was going crazy and was nearly in tears himself. John had taken him outside to sit on the porch and calm down and start formulating the world's greatest apology, as he was going to need it. And many people were getting in my way, coming up to me and telling me what a great job Tess and I did on Monday. I wanted to punch them in the face. None of them had said a single word to me the whole time I'd been at their stupid school, and yet here they were coming up and congratulating me like they'd known me for years. So I plastered on a grateful smile and thanked them, before brushing past to continue my search for Jemima. I wished Tess was with me, so I could share their praise and my trepidation.

No sooner had that thought crossed my mind that Tess ran up behind me, locking her fingers around my wrist and dragging me away from more apparent adoring fans of our work.

"Found her," she grinned.

She led me into what I assumed to be Amelia's bedroom, pushing me towards the open window. I gave her a questioning look, so she laughed and climbed out, poking her head back in to say "she's on the roof."

"Oh," I threw my hands in the air like of course that was the most obvious thing in the world, before clambering out after her.

I pulled myself up the gutter and teetered along the tiles after Tess, up to Jemima who was hunched next to the chimney, her legs pulled into her chest and her forehead on her knees.

"I'm such an idiot," she whispered as we sat down next to her.

"You be quiet, you, Michael is the idiot here, as we already informed him," I scoffed, snaking a hand around her shaking shoulders not unlike I did with Tess in the music room which seemed so long ago.

"I thought he really liked me," she wiped her runny nose on her sleeve before rubbing the goo off on her jeans. "But then I saw Whitney and I knew the real reason why he kissed me."

"He kissed you because he wants you," Tess reassured her, resting her head on her shoulder kindly. "He really wants to talk to you, and apologize. He just picked the wrong circumstances, and he's a boy. They're stupid and confusing but that's why we love them. He really likes you, Mim. You know he actually cried for a little bit trying to find you?"

"Good," Jemima snapped, but her harsh eyes had assuaged. "He deserves to know how it feels."

"Damn right he does!" I shouted, pounding my fist on my palm. "He's downstairs being weepy right now! You go down there and you let him know exactly how it feels!"

"Yeah!" Jemima exclaimed in liberation, and Tess and I helped her scramble to her feet. "Wait!" she paused, grabbing each of our hands. "I can't."

"Yes, you can!" Tess backed her up. "Mim, you are a beautiful, confident girl, and you are worthy of someone who cares for you. All you have to do is believe in them."

Halfway through her inspirational talk, Tess's eyes drifted to lock onto mine, and I got the feeling that she wasn't talking about Jemima and Michael anymore.

"You're so right. I have to talk to him," Jemima sighed scaling back down the roof. "Watch out for the rickety window frame in Amelia's room, we always had trouble with it when we were kids."

"Okay," Tess nodded, placing her hand in the small of my back and guiding me forward, sending inexplicable shivers down my spine.

I followed Jemima's lead, climbing through Amelia's window after her, and wishing her luck as she dashed out the door. I turned around to help Tess, but she just stared at me contemplatively from outside.

"Isn't it funny how one silly little kiss can cause all this trouble," she sighed. "Just once and Jemima and Michael's friendship could be ruined forever."

"I don't think so," I shrugged, unsure of where she was going with this. "I think they care about each other too much to let that happen."

"Do you care about me, Caity?" her question came from left field and I wasn't too sure how to answer.

"Uh, yeah, I guess," I bit my lip. "You're pretty much my best friend."

"So I could kiss you right now and it wouldn't destroy us?" she leaned forward, still hanging out of the window.

I took an uncertain step back. "Well, obviously you couldn't right now, because I'm in here and you're out there. And don't tell me the famous Tess Tyler would lower her standards to make out with measly old me."

An acerbic look crossed over her features and she made to hurriedly enter the room, but her boot got caught in the frame Jemima warned us about and she slipped backwards, teetering dangerously off the side of the house. I subconsciously shot forward, grabbing at any part of her I could get and pulling her frantically towards me. She tumbled in through the window head first and one of her flailing appendages struck into my stomach, knocking the wind out of me and I fell to the floor, gasping.

"Oh shit, I'm so sorry, Caitlyn!' Tess cried as she helped me to sit up, still wheezing.

"I'm sorry," she repeated, brushing my bangs out of eyes and I was super-consciously aware of her soft hands holding up my chin.

She was breathing heavily but it was nothing compared to me, but I couldn't bring myself to move, every muscle in my body was frozen solid, even my eyelids, which didn't close as Tess dipped her head and pressed her glossy lips to mine. She lingered for a few seconds, but it seemed like an eternity, before pulling away and rocking back on her heels, waiting apprehensively for me to say something, anything.

"You don't taste like cherry chapstick at all," I sighed. "Katy Perry lied to me."

She laughed lightly and it made me smile, and she stood up, pulling me to my feet. "See? Friendship intact. Nothing to worry about."

She went to walk past me and rejoin the party but I reached out and took her hand jerkily, spinning her back into me and pressing my forehead to hers. I wasn't thinking about anything except how pretty she looked with her flushed cheeks and rebellion in her eyes, and I kissed her back, properly this time. Her arms snaked around my waist hesitantly as I entangled my hands in her delicious smelling new hair. I could feel the acidic flavour of soda flood into my mouth on her tongue, but it only made me push deeper, further, making me more dizzy.

We pulled apart simultaneously as we heard a thump from outside the askew door. We were silent for a few moments, holding our breaths, hoping nobody would come in, before meeting each others gaze uneasily.

"What was that?" Tess said in hushed tones that were obviously not meant to be seductive, but god, they made me want to throw myself at her.

"I don't… I… I don't know," I stuttered, all the blood draining from my face and the pit of my stomach falling, falling, falling. "I have to go."

I dashed out of Amelia's room and stumbled down the stairs in a daze, trying to process everything. What had I done? I'd just kissed my best friend, a girl, and what's more, I wanted to do it again. And again. I had no idea where we stood or how we would go about making anything between us work, if even Tess wanted something. Hell, I didn't even know what I wanted. Did I want our relationship to progress further than this? It would change everyone's perceptions of me. It would change my perceptions of myself. I'd be stuck with a lesbian label, expected to conform to some stupid stereotype. But did that even matter if I got to be with Tess?

I reached the landing at the bottom of the stairs and gazed out across the sea of writhing high schoolers who were so content in their little bubbles of their own life, completely oblivious to the emotional turmoil that surrounded them everyday. We're either so comfortable with our lives that we just don't bother to take an interest in anyone else's, or we're so discontented that we're determined to change things that are destined to stay the same.

But my train of thought comes to a screeching as I spot Michael and Jemima out on the front lawn. Michael is on his knees and his hands are clasped together while Jemima is mixture of infuriated and trying not to laugh. A smile breaks over my face and I make a beeline towards them, before a blond boy without a football jacket slumps into me.

"Hey, Caitlyn, looking good," he leered drunkenly. "Do you know where Tess is?"

"No I don't," I snapped, pushing him away. "Stay away from her, you've done enough."

"Whitney said she wanted to see me," his eyebrows drew together in confusion.

"Whitney is a goddamn liar and you know it," I hissed, shoving past him and walking out the front door, only to see Michael and Jemima driving away in her car.

"Oh my god of all the wildly romantic apologetic gestures in the world, you had to miss the most amazing one," Ellen springs up behind me, an euphoric expression cast over her face.

"So they're together now?" I covered my mouth with my hand in excitement. If there was hope for those two maybe Tess and I could sort something out after all.

"I think they're going to get married," Ellen cooed dreamily, twirling around happily and heading inside. "Where were you and Tess? You guys got Jemima off the roof, and then missed her getting her happy ending!"

I opened my mouth and the shut it again. I wasn't sure what to say. Would Ellen tell anyone? I knew in my heart she wouldn't, but at the same time I didn't want to take that risk. I didn't want to confess to anything, not yet. If something was going to come out of Tess and I being together, then everyone talking about it would only make things more difficult. Ellen was staring at me weirdly, waiting for my answer, when we were both distracted by a shriek that burst from inside.

"Stay the hell away from me, Chris!"

"Tess!" we hissed simultaneously, dashing inside to see Tess with her wide eyes shining and Chris swaying unsteadily on his feet.

"Whitney told me you wanted to talk. I just need you to know that I never wanted to hurt you," he slurred miserably.

"But you did hurt me! You think just because you say you didn't mean it is going to make the pain any less, make it go away? It's never going to go away! It's so deep it's like something that grips my insides with an icy cold fist and then tries to pull them out of my throat so I can't breathe. I've been gasping for air ever since, but lately I've been breathing more and more, and then you just come up to me and say you didn't fucking mean to? Fuck you! How dare you!?" the mascara is dribbling down Tess's cheeks and everyone is staring at her. "I will never forgive you for what you did to me!"

There is silence surrounding us except for one person who seems to be laughing. That one person is dressed in a tight miniskirt and her manicured nails and tapping against her punch cup in amusement.

"You!" Tess screamed, taking a threatening step towards her, and I bet it was the first time in Whitney's charmed life that she'd ever looked scared. "Don't even get me started on you, you twisted little bitch! You're sick! I can't believe that I used to aspire to be like you! You're a sad, pathetic little person and I hope you die a miserable death!"

Whitney's jaw dropped in disbelief, and she even looked a little humiliated as a few surrounding kids murmured their agreement. By this time Tess had realised that she'd drawn attention to herself with her rant, and her face went red as she dashed out of the house.

"Tess!" Ellen called after her. "Bloody hell, is Whitney destined to ruin everyone's night?"

"I'll go talk to her," I sighed. "We'll probably leave. See you at school."

"Yeah, bye," Ellen mumbled distractedly as I left her to go and find Tess.

She was sitting in the drivers seat of her car, the keys were in the ignition but the engine wasn't running. I walked over to her side of the car and reached out to pat the top of her head, but she pulled away and I drew my hand back as though she had burned me.

"Caitlyn, it was just one silly little kiss," she choked. "It didn't mean anything. It was just a friend kiss."

"Don't say that," I gulped down the lump in my throat. "You know that's not true."

"Yes it is!" she grips the steering wheel tighter. "I can't do this Caitlyn, I can't have people talking about me behind my back again."

"Why would that even matter?" I sneered, crossing my arms over my chest angrily. "If we were together-"

"We're not going to be together, Caitlyn!" she snapped, finally turning on her Mustang and pulling off the handbrake. "I can't do it. I don't trust myself with you."

"But I trust you!" I protested. "I believe in you!"

"That's the problem," she winced, starting to back out of the driveway with me jogging beside her. "I don't think I can do this, us, if I don't believe in myself. I thought I did, but just then, flipping my shit, seeing how much the people I hate still get to me, I haven't changed at all, I've healed all wrong. I just need some time."

With that she swung the red car around and took off down the street, leaving me standing in the middle of the road without a clue in the world what was going on, the tail lights flashed red in the distance and that's when I realised that without Tess I had no ride home. Maybe she was right, maybe she was in denial, but if she needed time, I had all the time in the world.

She was worth waiting for.


So basically the motivation behind this was a review I received for Heroics & Hallelujahs making me want to claw my eyes out. I wrote this to spite it instead. GAAAHH ignorance makes me so ANGRY!!!
I'd love to hear about your shit homophobic opinions that you most certainly have a right to, really, but I'll probably just end up raging on you instead. I'm like that. Eh.
Constructive reviews are much appreciated though, as always :) I really needed to get it out of my system, but the ending was weird, I didn't know where else to go. Whatever, I enjoyed writing it :)