Hey guys! I decided to post again. I'll explain at the bottom of the page author's note, so please read that!
Hope you enjoy the new chapter!
I do not own the Private Novels; Kate Brian does!
My thought's once again were halted when my phone rang with another text message from: Noelle.
To: Reed
Ivy is awake. Just thought u shuld kno.
From: Noelle
I decided to text her back.
To: Noelle
Thnks. Mark told me tho. Herd its crazy at the hospital. She shuld be fine.
From: Reed
I received a text right away.
To: Reed
I thought u were sleeping?
From: Noelle
I texted her back the truth.
To: Noelle
I cant really. But we will talk later.
From: Reed
Once again, I received a text in an instant.
To: Reed
Ok. Try tho. Call me wen ur ready.
From: Noelle.
I decided to take her advice, so I placed my phone back on my desk and dropped onto my bed once again. Once my head hit the pillow filled with feathers, I fell into unconsciousness. And Sabine's face mocking me in my own nightmares.
My 'nap' didn't last long. Having Sabine's face ridicule me, during the only time that I get to slip into an unconscious state didn't ease my already jumping nerves. And having my phone ring again didn't make me any happier.
My phone's regular ring tone went off and I groggily got off my bed and answered the phone without looking to see who was calling me.
"Hello," I answered unsteadily.
"Reed! Are you okay," I heard Josh' voice fill my ears, he sounded worried. My heart did a flip, but then I mentally scolded myself for it.
"I'm fine, why?"
"You sound terrible. Did I interrupt something," he asked, full of worry and concern.
"No, I was trying to sleep but it wasn't working out so well," I said, truthfully. I wasn't going to lie to Josh anymore. Learning from my pasts mistakes, lying only made things worse.
"I'm sorry if I woke you," he said, sheepishly.
"No you didn't. I wasn't sleeping much before anyway, so what's up," I asked, curious of his call. Then it dawned on me, he was calling to keep his promise to keep me posted with Ivy. Of course.
"Ivy is awake and I'm on my way back to Easton. But, she practically kicked me out telling me to get cleaned up, so I'm going back after lunch," he said softly as he continued, "She requested for me to bring you when I go back."
I was somewhat shocked. Was she so mad at me that she wanted to scream and vent, right after she awoke from being shot? "Sure," I barely squeaked out.
Josh noticed the high pitch tone in my voice and countered, "Please, hold your enthusiasm."
I laughed lightly, "Very funny. But are you sure you don't want, umm, some alone time with her," I asked very quietly. Even though I hoped he was going to say no, I wanted him to say yes, so I wouldn't have to face her.
"No," he said to quickly. I raised my eyebrows even though he couldn't see it. "What I mean is, I don't think that is necessary. She requested you, so you must come."
"Fine. I'll meet you in the quad at 1:30," I said, trying to finish this conversation, even though I knew after this I was going to have about an hour to panic on what I would face with Ivy.
"All right. See you then," he said and we both hung up.
I threw my phone on my bed and it plopped with a small jump back up in the air, then back down onto the bed. I followed in pursuit.
Why would Ivy tell Josh to bring me with him, to visit her? Did she want to let me know as soon as possible that she loathed me? To stay away from her and Josh? Had Josh told her already about the gift I made him for Christmas? Why couldn't my life just get somewhat easier? Yes, I had Noelle back, but this extra stress with Ivy and Josh, wasn't helping me rebuild the life I once had and wanted back.
I took a deep breath and let it out slowly, trying to calm myself so I don't have a panic attack from the recent events. I knew I should be making my way to the dining hall right now to get some lunch, but I couldn't bring myself to it. To try and live a normal life when Ivy was in a hospital bed, getting ready to yell me out didn't put me in a happy mood and made me sick to my stomach. If I were to put food in my system now, it would just come back out and I didn't need that.
I checked the clock to see how much time I had, thirty minutes. I had just spent, thirty minutes contemplating my situation between Ivy and Josh, and if I kept sitting here, it would be another thirty minutes.
I got off from my bed and made my way down the hall towards the bathroom to freshen up. I washed my face again and used the lavatory, following washing my hands. I walked back to my room and took off my Penn State t-shirt, to put on a tan Topless t-shirt, that had a sketch of a giraffe on it. I grabbed my Penn State sweatshirt, knowing that it was still cold outside and put that on. I didn't care how I dressed. If Noelle saw what I was wearing now, she would scold me for it.
I took a quick look in the mirror to see how I looked. My hair was in a disarray, so I quickly ran a brush through it and put it in a low pony tail with a black plaid Mark Jacobs headband holding it back. I had dark circles under my eyes and looked like I hadn't slept in weeks. The sleep I had been missing ever since I found out of Cheyenne's death has finally caught up with me and my physical appearance.
There was no point on trying to fix myself to look better, because it wouldn't work, so I gave up and grabbed a small Gucci wristlet, Noelle had given me awhile back and put my cell phone, and other necessities in it.
Right when I was walking out the door, I noticed I only had socks on. I really am a mess. So I quickly took those off and grabbed my ankle black knit UGG boots to overlap my pants. Once I slipped them onto my feet, I was in pure bliss. The soft, luscious sheep skin did the job to relax and unwind my anxiousness, just by comfort.
I then headed out my room and out of Pemberley, where I was hit with a cold blast of wind, that came onto me like a wall. It was slightly drizzling out, the skies getting ready to open for a downpour of rain. I quickly made my way to the Quad, where I saw Josh sitting on a bench.
He was no longer dressed in his bloody clothes, and had a Yale sweatshirt on with jeans. Even with something so simple, he looked very desirable. As I got closer to him, he noticed me coming and turned to me with a small smile that I matched.
Once I approached him, I got a better look of his blue eyes, that usually were so pure and full with joy, now they were blank. Pain etching around and anxiety. I just wanted to be the one to get rid of all that.
He stood from his bench and started walking towards me, where we met and he said softly, "Hi."
"Hi," I said, trying to force a smile which I knew he could read through.
"Ready," he asked as he turned to walk towards the front of the Bradwell building, where the driveway was located.
"Yeah," I said and followed behind him. The air around us was thick and heavy, and you could cut the tension with a knife. So many questions that haven't been asked, just wanting to explode out of my mouth like a volcano. Yet, I kept quiet. And so did he.
As we got closer to the driveway, I didn't see his Black Range Rover, so I asked, "Where's your Range Rover?"
He finally got out of whatever trance he was in and answered, "I couldn't drive it anymore. Everything that happened with Thomas and Arianna," he took a deep breath, remembering the awful memories as did I. "It was just too much."
I nodded my head, understanding. He turned from his gaze on me and started towards a black Cayenne Turbo Porsche, that had black rims. As we approached the car, he opened the passenger door for me and I said a quiet "thank you," with a small smile.
"Your welcome," he said as he closed the door for me. As he walked towards the driver's side of the mid-sized vehicle, I was able to breathe in his natural scent that was filled with nature and paint.
He opened the driver's door and took a sit in the driver's seat. He started the engine, as it purred like a cat, so smooth and delicate. He slowly made our way from Easton, where we entered the real world.
The tension was still strong and tense. I didn't want to move, and do something wrong so I stayed quiet. Just looking out the window as the rain started to become harder and harder. The green oak trees blurred together as we sped from them away. Getting lost in my own quiet world, Josh must have noticed because he asked slowly, "How are you dealing?"
How was I dealing? Horribly. I felt like I was stuck in a bubble and I was never going to get out. Whenever I close my eyes, I see Sabine's face holding a gun right at me, and the shot going off. But, it wasn't like I was going to tell him that. "I'm, dealing."
He nodded his head as if a way to tell me he understood. Another few minutes passed by of silence, before he broke it again. "If you need to talk, I'm here," he spoke softly, and his voice was gentle.
A smile formed on my lips and I responded, "Thanks. And if you need to talk also, I'm here." He smiled a warm, true and genuine smile that made me feel better. He was glad that I still cared.
"Reed, we're going to have to talk soon. About a lot of different things," he said, glancing in my direction.
I rubbed my eyes with my hands, just so tired and run down. Talk. The one thing I wasn't ready for. Talk with Noelle. Talk with Josh. Talk with Ivy. Talk. Talk. Talk. It was just, so frustrating. Why did things have to be difficult? Why couldn't life be easy? As much as I wanted to talk with Josh, and Noelle, I wasn't ready yet. I was still in shock. Just entering reality.
"Yeah, talk," I said slowly and quietly. I turned my attention to him and gave him a fake smile, just trying to reassure him of something.
"Later," he said as we entered the hospital parking lot. "After this."
I nodded my head as he parked his car and jumped out to open the door for me. I had my hand on the handle and started to open it, so he didn't feel required to open the door for me. Yet he still made his way toward my side and was able to help me out. Once again I said a quiet "thank you," and he followed with a warm smile and "you're welcome."
We made our way towards the hospital, the air still somewhat tense, yet it was more warm and welcoming around us. The sliding doors opened and the chill of the hospital ran sudden fear through me.
Here I was. Walking towards Ivy. With the guy I still loved, who she loved. She wanted to talk, so we were. We were going to talk. I was walking towards my own personal hell, where a fuming Ivy would be waiting. I had agreed to this!
My eyes started darting around, to the surrounding people, yet could not focus on a single person. I think there were some Easton students lounging in the waiting room, I couldn't be sure. It all seemed to be a blur.
My heart started to speed up, as we made our way down the long, cold, sterile hallway that led to room 4007. I couldn't hear the passing nurses and doctors. The noises of health machines, beeping through the opened doors leading to another person's misfortune, couldn't even subdued the loud beats of my heart, racing through my body.
My first walk through this hall, was somewhat different. I was meeting Josh. I knew Ivy wasn't awake and I could handle that. But now, I had to face a very awake Ivy. An Ivy that wanted me. She wanted to get all of her accumulated rage out on me.
As we reached room 4007, Josh turned to look at me and gave me an encouraging smile. He then put his gentle hand on the probably cold doorknob and turned the handle. Slowly opening the door, as a small creak let out. I did a quick peek inside before Josh took the lead for me to follow, and saw a very enthused looking Ivy. As expected, Josh took the lead and left me to follow.
Before I entered the room, "Dear lord," I cried in my mind, "What did I get myself into?"
Then an expression that an old friend back in my home town Croton, Pennsylvania told me, filled my mind, "Life's tough, get a helmet!"
So, what do you think? I always loved that expression, "life's tough, get a helmet!" so I had to figure a way to include it! Anyway, the reason I updated again is because I won't be able to update for a couple of days. I might be able to tomorrow, but I'm not making any promises! See, I'm leaving friday to play in a tennis tournament, and decided not to bring my laptop since I wouldn't have time to even go on it. Anyway, I hopefully won't be back till monday, so I won't be able to start writing another chapter till tuesday, and ext..So, I thought I'd give you this! Please do me two things; wish me luck for my tournament and review! That's all i ask!
-Marie!
