The rest of the day went by just as slowly as the past two had. Simon and Isabelle had switched posts with Jace and Clary, who had essentially left Magnus alone the entire day. They took care of the kids for him, leaving him alone to his thoughts. But shortly after Magnus had helped put the twins to bed, the door opened again, this time bearing Catarina and-
"Alexander?" Magnus could hear the surprise and the excitement in his own voice. As he began to all but sprint towards Alec, Catarina held up a hand and gently said, "Not too rough, Magnus. He's still a bit weak."
Even as she said it, Alec was softly sliding into his arms, and Magnus was certain that he had never before been so relieved. He leaned down, burying his face in Alec's hair, wishing beyond belief that the past few days had just been a dream. But even as he wished it, he could feel how weak Alec was now, so he led his husband to the couch, sitting beside him and not daring to let go of him in any way.
It was then that Magnus realized Alec had not spoken a word since he entered the apartment. He finally looked at Catarina, really looked, and he could see traces of fear and concern written across her face. He could tell that she was trying to keep it contained, but he knew her well enough to clearly see that something was seriously amiss.
"Catarina, what's going on? Please honestly explain this time, no more skirting around the truth, please. I'm begging you." He felt Alec gently squeeze his hand, as if asking him to calm down. Catarina sighed and took a seat of her own, looking at Magnus with terribly sad eyes. The sadness was something Magnus could hardly handle. He didn't want sympathy for whatever was happening.
"Alec is very ill, Magnus. And the problem is that I'm not entirely sure it's something that I myself can heal. He needs mundane treatment. But unless he wants to lose his Marks, that cannot happen."
Magnus stared back at her with a blank expression, trying to process what she had just explained, oblivious to the fact that Jace was getting this crushing news as well. Somehow, he found his voice, although it felt as though he were a million miles away. "What are you saying? If he doesn't get treatment, then what?"
It was clear that Catarina did not want to answer, but in the end she knew that Magnus deserved the truth as soon as she was able to give it to him. "He's got a tumor, Magnus. A brain tumor. And if it's not treated, he will definitely die."
The world froze around Magnus. He couldn't so much as tell if he was breathing, not that he really cared at this point. He had suspected the truth long before it left Catarina's lips. But that didn't mean it was any easier to hear or to process.
He could tell that Alec was talking to him, trying to get his attention, trying to get absolutely anything out of him, but he couldn't seem to find himself. He couldn't seem to reattach what had just broken so that he could process the world around him. That was, until he heard the sharp cry of a very angry child, Max.
"You lied!" Max was definitely screaming. "You lied, Dad! How could you?" Alec was looking back and forth between Max and Magnus, obviously in utter confusion. Before he had the time to think about anything that was going on, Magnus was on his feet, headed toward his son.
The boy didn't have time to make another comment before Magnus had swept him out of the living room and into the first room he could reach with the squirming child. Sitting on the bed before him, Magnus firmly held Max in his arms, ensuring that the child would not be going anywhere.
Once Max had calmed down enough so that he had stopped trying to escape, Magnus turned him around and made sure he was listening. "Max, listen to me very well, please." He tried to be stern, but he couldn't seem to find it in himself to do so. He leaned forward and touched his forehead to his son's.
Max couldn't help but smile as he did so, reacting to the way his father usually cheered him up, the touching of their foreheads. Magnus took a deep breath and began again. "Max, I know you're scared. We all are. But your father will be absolutely fine."
His heart sunk as his son looked up at him with tear-filled eyes. "Daddy?" His voice was soft, as though he was trying to keep from crying again. "How do you know that he will be fine? What could you possibly do other than let him have treatment and lose his marks?"
It was a moment before Magnus could answer. The problem was that he was unable at first to come up with anything that he might be capable of doing to help Alec. Max obviously sensed his hesitation because he decided to continue speaking. "It's not like you can just give whatever this is to someone else, Daddy. I just want him to be okay again."
As soon as Max had finished speaking, a grim idea lit up inside Magnus. He suddenly knew what he could do, what he had to do at all costs. The only trouble was getting Alexander to agree with the decision. The only trouble was making sure nothing went wrong, and where they were involved, things went wrong far more often than not.
His mind made, Magnus turned his attention back to his son, knowing what he had to do but not daring to let his expression betray him. "I swear to you, Max, that your father will be perfectly fine in a very short amount of time. I will never let anything happen to him. You have my word."
Alec was sitting on the couch, utterly confused and feeling more terrified than he ever had before. Catarina had explained to him what was going on before they had come to the apartment, but the weight of just what was going on had not hit him until he had watched Magnus rush out of the room attempting to comfort Max.
There was absolutely no way he could lose his Marks. He would not be forced to leave his Shadowhunter half of the family, not to mention breaking his bond with Jace. But dying wouldn't help the case either, and he knew that either option would completely crush Jace and Isabelle, something he couldn't bear the thought of.
Then he realized that Jace had been completely silent through the entire talk with Catarina, and looking over at him now, Alec could read his expression like a book. The fear, the pain, the confusion had swallowed any hope that had once been in Jace's eyes. So he cleared his throat and attempted to catch Jace's attention.
"Jace, please, listen to me." He kept his voice soft even though he felt like screaming. To his surprise, Jace looked over at him with questioning eyes, so Alec motioned for him to take the vacant seat on the couch.
Gently placing a hand over Jace's, Alec began speaking, carefully choosing his words. "I won't do it, Jace. I'm not going to let them break our bond. You don't have to worry about that; I promise."
Jace quickly looked up, startled. "What? No, Alec, what are you talking about?" His voice was frantic. "You cannot just give up and die. That would be a million times worse than you losing your Marks." He was turned facing Alec now, both of his hands covering Alec's. His eyes were pleading, his voice feverish yet distant.
Alec slowly shook his head, his confusion clear. "What are you saying, Jace? You'd rather me lose my Marks, lose me as your parabatai, lose me as your brother and never see me again than watch me die?"
"Yes, Alec. That is exactly what I am saying. I would rather you live, be with Magnus and raise your children. Knowing that you were alive would mean much more to me than knowing you died trying to save me from pain." His hands were shaking, and Alec took firm hold of them, trying to calm Jace down.
"I couldn't do that to you. The thought of our bond breaking makes me sick, Jace. I can't cause you that much pain. I won't. I'm sorry." Jace sighed, knowing that Alec was going to fight every inch of the way, but knowing that more than anything he needed to live.
"Alec, you must realize by now that either option is going to cause me immense pain. There's no saving me from hurt. You don't have to play the hero here. In fact, I'm begging you not to. They won't strip you of your Marks until you're healed. So take the treatment, and I'll be there ever second. Then you can go on and live the rest of your life the way you were meant to. Please."
Before Alec could reply, Magnus stepped into the room again. His face was completely void of emotion and Alec could not discern anything from it. He looked completely composed, the only thing that seemed slightly amiss was how tense he was.
"Max is back in bed," he began, his voice heavy, as though he had not slept in days. "I really need to talk to Catarina about something. It shouldn't take long, but I must ask you, Alexander, that you let me talk to her alone. I will explain everything shortly."
There was only a short pause before Alec replied. "Of course, take all the time you need. I'm going to ask Jace and Clary to kindly help me get to the Institute again. I should talk to Isabelle about this. Just come get us when you're done here."
Magnus's decision was reinforced as he watched Alec painfully struggle to his feet, leaning heavily on Jace. As soon as the door shut, he turned on Catarina, ready to begin work on what he knew would be the longest struggle of his life.
