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Chapter Three

"And this is where we eat," Katara said, pulling Zuko out of a wide hall and into a spacious foyer that opened onto a balcony. The ceiling stretched far above his head; the light from the fire burning in a small circle of stones didn't reach it. Sitting around the fire was a ragtag group of people that included the Gaang.

Zuko stopped short, Katara's hand slipping out of his as she kept walking. Feeling the loss, she came back to stand beside him. "What's the matter?"

He looked from the group of people to Katara, trying to convey everything he was feeling. Walking the empty corridors with her as she pointed out rooms was one thing. He could deal with just one person; it might even have been considered comforting the way she carried the conversation even with his short replies. But stretched before him was a mass of people that he wasn't sure he was up to facing.

Katara laid a comforting hand on Zuko's shoulder. "It'll be okay. I'll be right here."

"Katara!"

Startled, Zuko dropped into a defensive stance, pushing Katara behind him.

Aang skidded to a stop as Toph walked calmly around the Airbender.

"Cool it, Fire Boy," she said nonchalantly. "We're not going to hurt you."

He felt Katara's hand resting lightly on his shoulder. "It's okay, Zuko."

Zuko relaxed his stance but didn't let his guard down. He did try, for Katara's sake but he just couldn't drop it entirely. He'd been betrayed and had betrayed too many for him to completely trust those around him.

Katara gave his shoulder a gentle squeeze. "What is it guys?"

Aang came closer but kept a watchful eye on Zuko as he said, "Your dad was looking for you."

"We were just coming to find you when you walked in," Toph added.

Katara smiled excitedly. "Come on, Zuko. There's someone I'd like you to meet."

Taking him by the elbow, she guided him along gently, keeping to the outskirts of the crowd. When they had reached the other side of the room, Katara directed him to a stone bench against the wall. It was mostly blocked from the view of the crowd so it was private. "You can wait here if you like. Nobody should bother you."

Zuko nodded his thanks and sat down. How did she know that he wasn't up to being the center of attention yet? It was the same with the way she'd avoided the Avatar's questioning look when he'd spotted her hand resting on Zuko's shoulder. It was as though she knew exactly what he was thinking and feeling. How was that even possible?

"This way, Dad," he heard Katara say. He looked around the boulder blocking her from his view and saw her leading an older man toward him. There was something vaguely familiar about him but Zuko couldn't put his finger on it.

Katara and her father stepped around the boulder. Her father smiled warmly at him. "So, you've decided to join the land of the living at last."

Zuko raised a questioning eyebrow in Katara's direction. She looked away from his gaze and up at her father. "Dad, this is Zuko, Prince of the Fire Nation. Zuko, this is my father, Hakoda of the Southern Water Tribe."

Hakoda bowed. "It's a pleasure to meet you; I've heard so much about you."

Zuko cringed and Katara shuffled her feet.

"I think I'm going to go get something to eat." She walked around the boulder then peeked her head back around. "Are you coming?"

Zuko blinked at her expectant face. "It was nice to meet you, sir," he said at last, standing and bowing then following Katara around the outside edge of the foyer.

"The food is in here," she explained, ducking through a doorway and into a side room. Setting in the middle over a cooking fire was a pot of rice. In a haphazard stack near the pot were bowls of various sizes. Katara picked up one and spooned some rice into it. Holding it out to him, she asked, "Do you want it? It's not much but it's all we've got for now."

Zuko took the bowl from her and stood by a wall nearby. "Katara," he asked, looking at the rice. "What did your dad mean by my joining the land of the living?"

He looked up when she didn't answer and saw her looking up at him. The ladle in her hand was suspended over the rice, forgotten. "You were asleep a long time, Zuko." She spoke quietly, looking away from him. He gulped in discomfort.

"How long?"

She swallowed and spooned some rice into her waiting bowl before replying quietly, "Long enough for us to wonder if you'd ever wake up."

He fell back against the wall, all the air leaving his body as he sank to the floor. "That's a long time," he breathed.

"It was touch and go for awhile," Katara explained softly, coming to sit next to him. "Not only were you sick but you'd suffered a blow to the head. That's why I suspect you don't remember everything that's happened. It's only been the last few days that I've felt like you could be left alone. Before that, someone was always there, watching, waiting to alert me if you took a bad turn. Lucky for us you didn't." She looked down at her rice and moved it around in her bowl. "I don't know what I would've done if you'd gotten any worse; I'm not an experienced healer."

They were both silent, looking at the rice in their bowls but not having much of an appetite.

Finally, Katara said, "You talked." Zuko's head snapped up and he looked at her intently. She was looking across the room at nothing in particular. "While you were sleeping, you talked."

"About what?"

Katara set her bowl aside, choosing instead to play with the folds of her robes. "Most of it I couldn't understand but your uncle mainly. You're worried about him."

She didn't say anything about his mumbled apologies to her and his murmuring her name. Or about the way his hand would grip hers tight enough to leave bruises. And she didn't tell him about the times he'd jerked up in bed, his eyes wide and unseeing and his throat tight with his screaming.

Zuko looked away and down at his bowl of rice. "I guess I am. I haven't heard anything about him since I was imprisoned."

"He's not imprisoned anymore," Katara told him quietly. "He escaped on the day of the invasion."

Zuko jumped to his feet. "Where is he? I have to speak to him!"

Katara looked up at him. "He's not here. He and another member of the White Lotus Society have gone on some secret scouting mission."

Zuko began to pace across the room, shooting questions at Katara in rapid succession, not waiting for her answers. "Did you see him? Was he okay? Did he ask about me? Does he know that I'm sorry?"

Katara stood and placed a hand on his chest, stopping his pacing. "Take a deep breath Zuko. Yes, I did see him and, yes, he seemed okay. No, he didn't ask about you but I told him you were here and that you were sick and he hardly left your side from the time he arrived until he had to leave."

Zuko sighed and sank down on a bench setting against a wall. "Does he know I'm sorry?"

Katara contemplated lying to him, just so that he'd stay calm. He'd scared her for a moment; he'd been unconscious a long time and she didn't want him to overexert himself. She didn't want him to relapse. But one look at his tortured face and she knew that lying to placate him was out of the question. She just couldn't bring herself to do it.

Sitting down beside him, she looked at her hands folded in her lap and said quietly, "I don't know."

"Do you think he'll ever forgive me?"

She looked up at him and sought out his eyes. They were downcast and Katara could see pain swimming amidst his confusion and guilt. Resting her palm against his jaw, she pulled his chin up so he was looking at her. "Zuko, you're uncle loves you very much. I could see it in the way he helped me nurse you back to health. You're like a son to him. I don't see how he couldn't forgive you. You made a mistake; everyone makes mistakes."

"But not everyone's mistakes lead to the death of the Avatar or to having Uncle thrown in prison for treason." He took her hand is his and pulled it away from his face. "And not everyone's mistakes destroy as much as mine do."

Katara squeezed his hand. "But Aang is alive and your uncle isn't in jail anymore. Your wrongs have been righted."

"But not forgotten." He stood up from the bench and walked to a window, looking out into the night. "And not forgiven."

Katara followed him. "I've forgiven you. I know that there is good inside you; I've seen it. But it's like a fire that needs to be fanned. It's dim and weak but, with help, it could grow and consume you like your rage once did. You could be great, Zuko."

Zuko felt Katara's hope. It was hard not to. It radiated off her like light from the sun. But it was equally hard to accept it. She had so much of it aimed at him. What if she was wrong? What if he wasn't as good as she thought? What if he let her down as he had Uncle? He didn't know if he could bare the guilt a second time. "What if…what if I'm not good enough? What if you're wrong about me?"

He looked down at her and she smiled warmly. "You are as good as you allow yourself to be. If you want to be a noble person, if you truly want it, then nothing can stop you but yourself."

"Yeah, maybe so." Zuko said doubtfully. He suddenly got a sharp pain in his side, wrapping his arms around his stomach and letting out a moan of pain. Katara rushed to him.

"Zuko!" she cried. He collapsed and held his side; it felt like his stomach was caving it on itself. An odd feeling came to his throat and, before he knew it, he had thrown up the little rice he had eaten.

Katara jumped back from the pool of spit up and stared at him. He was straightening up and looked pale again.

"You must have eaten too much too quickly," Katara exclaimed. She felt so stupid for not being more careful. "You've been on a small diet for a long time. While you were asleep, it was hard to give you proper meals," she explained quickly.

Zuko groaned and felt his energy drain out of his already weak body.

"Come on, we have to get you back to your room. I should have known better than let you be out this long in your condition! I'm so sorry!" She moved to help him up and put his arm over her shoulder. Zuko didn't say anything, just focused on trying to keep his legs underneath himself.

"Sokka! Come help me," Katara cried out to her brother. He was sitting nearby, next to a girl Zuko didn't recognize. Sokka and the girl took one look at the scene and jumped up to help.

"What happened?" Sokka asked Katara, taking Zuko's other arm and putting it over his shoulder.

"Here, allow me, Katara," Suki said taking Zuko's other arm from her so Katara could talk to Sokka properly.

"Thanks, Suki," Katara replied quickly, turning to her brother. "He ate his rice too quickly and threw up. We need to get him back to his room. I shouldn't have let him," Katara said worriedly.

Sokka consoled her. "It's all right Katara. You're doing your best. He'll be fine."

They got Zuko to his bed and Sokka and Suki left Katara with her patient. Katara spent the remaining of the day there. Zuko stayed awake as long as he could; Katara feared that he may take a bad turn if he fell asleep again. He started getting better and Katara consented finally that he would be fine and agreed to leave him to sleep.

"Pleasant dreams, Zuko," Katara said softly as she closed the door behind her.


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