So here is the next chapter to Bullet. I would like to thank everyone for all the favourites and reviews, I really wasn't expecting this little vent story to attract any attention! So thank you very much. *hugs everyone*

Okay, so here we find out Matthew was held back a year. It has to do with a sort of prequel story I am making to this one, focused on PruCan. I will most likely start it after this one is close to being done. It isn't song inspired, it spawned from this story actually and is called 'Catch Me if You Can' and it is more cheerful than this one. Atleast so far it is! So look for that in the future I suppose.

As for my friend, I make sure to see her a few times a week and we do something fun. I always make sure she knows how important, loved, and wanted she is. She recently moved farther away, but only fifteen minutes more, and I think it was a good move for her because they moved to a huge acerage property and got a dog, and she seems a bit happier, so I don't mind the extra 15 minutes. I also recently talked her into arranging with her parents to go with a counseller, so I think she is slowly healing. I hope anyways.


Gone too far yea I'm gone again
It's gone on too long tell you how it ends
I'm sitting on the edge with my two best friends
One's a bottle of pills and one's a bottle of gin.

Lovino dragged himself into art and tossed his bag onto one of the desks, slumping into the seats with a huff. He looked around the art room and didn't see anyone he knew. Perfect, just peachy. He pulled out his sketch book and a pencil, beginning to sketch the lines of a young man standing alone. He may not be as good of an artist at his brother, but he was pretty damn good, or at the very least above average. As he continued sketching and shading the drawing too shape, it was rather dark, but then again so was his mind. He was aware of someone hovering over his shoulder, but tried to pay them no mind. Or at least he was until they cleared their throat, causing him to turn around. "Hello." The boy said in a soft voice, Lovino recognized him as the Asian boy, Kiku, Feliciano had been hanging with. "Oh... Hey." Lovino said awkwardly, flipping to a new page in his sketch book quickly. He recognized confusion on Kiku's face and sighed again. "You do realize I am Feliciano's brother, not Feliciano himself right?" Realization passed over Kiku's face. "Oh Lovino I'm sorry I-" Romano cut him off by waving his hand in dismissal."Yeah, yeah, whatever." He grumbled and turned back to his drawing. Kiku hesitated, before leaving Lovino in peace, where he remained sketching by himself for the of the class.

Lovino glared at the clock as he walked into his last class, science. One more block then home, one more block then home... He looked up and saw Matthew sitting in a seat in the back corner, waving to him. He sighed, giving the clock another glare, before heading to sit beside Matthew. They chatted for a bit and Lovino learned another interesting thing about Matthew, he was actually a year older than Lovino. The blonde didn't seem to want to speak much of it, but apparently something happened the year before and he missed three quarters of the school year and had to retake his freshman year. Lovino was rather shocked, as he hadn't been expecting that, well he hadn't been expecting Matthew to be gay either... Anyways, he was also rather curious as to why he had missed so much, but it appeared to be an awkward subject for the other boy, so he quickly dropped it. The majority of class consisted of note taking on who-the-fuck-knows-what and a few assigned questions. When the bell rang Lovino sighed loudly in relief and pack up his things. He yawned, stretched, and slung his pack over his shoulder, and headed out the door after a quick good-bye to Matthew. Now to find Feliciano and walk home, hopefully his brother won't have forgotten and ditched him...

Suprisingly, Feliciano was exactly where he said he would be, and he wasn't with Kiku or the scary blonde, who Lovino still didn't know the name of. Lovino braced himself, then approached his brother. "Oi, fratello, ready to go?" He huffed, not waiting for a response before heading down the street to their home. Feliciano jumped up and darted after his brother, linking elbows and babbling on about pasta, Kiku, and the german who was apparently called Ludwig. Lovino took it all in stride, nodding, forcing a smile and laughing when he felt it was needed. Secretly, he longed to be his brother, not because of all his talents, or because everyone liked him best, oh no never that. Lovino really wished to be like his brother, he supposed. Feliciano was always so happy, and could make anyone smile. In fact, Feliciano was the only one who could make Lovino feel even remotely close to feeling better, and Lovino appreciated that. Before he knew it, they were home and Feliciano was digging in his bag for their keys. Lovino sighed and reached it Feliciano's jacket pocket, pulling out the keys and handing them to his brother, who laughed in response with a soft 'Ve'. He unlocked the door and kicked of his shoes, humming happily and heading into the kitchen. Lovino watched him go with a soft sigh, then headed up to his room, fumbling with the small black box in his pocket as he climbed the stairs.

Lovino placed the box onto his book shelf, pushing it to the back and pulling forward some random knick-knack he had to hid it somewhat. He stretched and locked his door, heading over to his bed and pulling a black, leather bound book from between the two mattresses. With a yawn he crawled into his bed and lay on his stomach, flipping the book open to the front page and scanning it over. He scrunched up his face and scanned over the page yet again, reading his cursive writing scrawled across the page. He sighed, the page was his plan for killing himself. He had a date and time set, along with several possible locations and a rough draft of his suicide note. He still had to plan just how he was going to do it. He flipped to the next page where it listed several methods that he could kill himself with, so far the methods that looked best were hanging, jumping off a bridge, jumping off a building, or overdosing on his grandfather's pain killers. He had considered slitting his wrist, but the survival rate was too high for his liking with that option. He had seriously considered shooting himself, it was so final, so quick. Sadly he had to give up on that one, as he had no where to obtain a gun from, but the option was still starred in his book. He flipped by a few pages, to one that was only filled half way down. It was a record of what he had eaten on certain days, the calorie intake, and his weight. He frown and gave a small sigh as he recorded a new day and what he had eaten for breakfast, before closing the book and slipping it back into it's hiding space with a sigh. He heard his grandfather's voice drift upstairs that it was time for dinner, he hadn't even noticed how much time had passed.