Chapter 3

Rick had already bought them tuna steaks to grill for dinner when he was in town that morning, and when clouds rolled in late that afternoon, they decided to finally climb out of the pool and head for the farm stand in case a storm blew through. Both being several beers in, they elected to walk, the distance there and back reasonable enough to be completed in an hour's time, and the breeze that'd accompanied the darker skies made the air far more comfortable than it'd been earlier in the day.

They purchased an assortment of vegetables and fruit, both for that evening and for their remaining two days, and Kate dove into it the moment they got back to the house, cutting up much of the fruit for a salad over a glass of wine, while Rick mainly watched and picked, which, to be honest, she quite preferred.

"You know, it's kind of soothing watching you work in the kitchen like this. You're very...precise," he told her, popping another grape into his mouth. "Ever consider being a chef?"

"Not a chef, no, never. I enjoy eating food more than I enjoy preparing it, but I did want to be a surgeon at one point when I was younger, so that might be where the steady knife stems from."

"Well, I have no doubt you could've done it, or anything else you wanted to do for that matter. You're a very tenacious woman." He finished the final sip in his wine glass and reached for the bottle. "You know what I wanted to be when I was growing up?"

Kate stopped slicing the peach pinned beneath her fingers and looked up. "I'm almost scared to ask, but what's that?"

"A window washer."

She chuckled in disbelief. "You wanted to be a window washer? Seriously? Why?"

"I remember being out with my mother when I was about nine. We were out wandering in Midtown, shopping or running errands or something, and we were stopped at the end of a block waiting to cross the street, and I looked up and saw these two guys hanging off this building made of glass. I just stood there, staring and staring at them, absolutely transfixed, until Mother tugged at my arm and we had to cross. I just couldn't imagine what it must've been like to see the city from up there, how amazing it must've been." His voice trailed off as he finished recounting the experience, his tone almost wistful.

Kate picked up a slice of the peach with the tip of the knife and offered it to him. "That's actually really sweet, Castle. Even back then you were imagining the world from other perspectives. I mean, that's what your writing is, right? It feels sort of poetic the way things worked out."

"I suppose," he said, thinking on her words. "You know, part of me wishes you never had to even think about becoming a cop, but then another part of me, a very selfish part of me, can't imagine what my life would be like right now if you hadn't. I'm sorry. I know that must sound awful."

"Things happen that we can't control, Castle, awful things. Was this the path I ever imagined I'd be on? No. Do I wish things were different? I do, but only the things that led me to take the first step along that path to begin with. I feel like I belong there now, like I belong with the NYPD and that family. And it didn't sound awful, Castle. I love what I do, and if what I do has meant something to you, too, then I'm glad."

"This is some pretty heavy stuff to talk about over fruit," Rick said, pulling open a drawer nearby for plastic wrap. "Are you hungry?"

"I'm starving, actually."

"Okay, here, take this and cover the bowl. Why don't you go get cleaned up and I'll get the tuna and veggies ready for the grill. When you're finished, I'll jump in the shower again quickly and then we'll get this stuff cooking. It shouldn't take long at all."

"Sounds like a plan. May I?" she asked reaching for the bottle of wine.

"Allow me," Rick said, pouring her another. "There are extra towels in the linen closet in your bathroom if you need them. Oh, and no stealing the soap or shampoo. We always count when our guests check out," he teased, sending her off.

xxxx

When Kate emerged from her room, Rick was nowhere to be found, the bowl of fruit salad left on the counter next to two large pouches of aluminum foil and the half-empty bottle of wine they'd opened. She could hear the sound of running water coming from upstairs, so she knew immediately where he'd gone and that she had some time alone. Leaving her glass behind, she began to wander from room to room, taking in parts of him he'd chosen to share through photographs and trinkets and art.

He was so many things, so many things she both knew well and didn't know at all, like one of her cases, one where she had pieces of a thing but not a whole. She was fascinated by him, confounded by him, challenged by him, turned on by him in ways she'd never imagined and rarely admitted, and she felt immense exhilaration being alone in his space.

"Ah, I found you," Rick said, stepping through the doorway of his study, the room just across the hallway from where she was staying. Startled, she turned for the voice, bumping into the corner of his desk like she didn't even know it was there. "And, I'm..." He looked at her standing there and couldn't say another word, not because he didn't want to, but because somewhere between the curve of her bare shoulders and the soft line of her yellow dress, he'd simply lost the ability.

"Castle?" she asked, sincere in her concern given the perplexity of his stare. "Are you okay?"

He moved slowly into the room until he was able to take hold of the back of a chair for balance. "I'm fine, yeah, I just need a second." Kate came around the desk towards him, giving him full view of her form. "I, uh, I really hate to bring up one of my more embarrassing recent moments, Kate, but somehow you've managed to render me speechless for the second time today, which is particularly painful for a writer. "That dress is...you look incredible."

His candor hit her everywhere, more so in the places she spent so much time trying exhaustingly to keep guarded. "Lanie told me I should bring it," she said flustered, wandering her body with her own eyes as his did.

"And I've never wanted to thank Lanie more," he replied, his fingers near white from his grip on the chair.

"Thank you, Castle. You look nice, too. It almost seems like a shame no one else is going to see us."

"It does, doesn't it?" he said in feigned agreement, though he wasn't certain he'd ever felt more grateful to have her to himself. "And now that I finally think I can behave like a gentleman once again, shall we feast? I mean, if you'd rather keep snooping, I can just grab a fork and attack that fruit bowl out there."

"That's not, I wasn't snooping, I was admiring, well, except for that photo over there. I can't wait to hear the story about your hair," she said, swallowing a taunting smile.

"I feel like you may hear a lot tonight, actually, if you're going to be wearing that thing, so please accept my apology in advance, and when I tell you it's the wine talking and to ignore me, it'd be great if you just went ahead and humored me."

She walked past him with a sideways glance. "Guess I'll have to wait and see, Castle. Depends how good your tuna is."

xxxx

The sky had cleared without leaving a drop of rain behind, but the breeze that'd trickled in with the clouds had lingered, gifting a perfect evening for them to enjoy their meal outside. They sat across from one another at a table beneath the pool house patio's cover, their view the length of the softly lit water and beyond, and the noise of the city felt like a distant memory as silence blissfully enveloped them.

"I really need to get one of these pool things in my new apartment," Kate joked, her focus drawn by its passive seduction more than once. "I think it could really add a certain je ne sais quoi, you know? Sort of like a new vase."

"Mmm, yeah," Rick said, swallowing his last spear of asparagus. "I mean, I don't know what your new place is going to look like, but a pool can really work as a great focal point for an apartment, not to mention how practical it is." Kate giggled and he followed suit. "So, I guess you didn't care for my tuna," he said smugly, pointing to her empty plate.

"Not a bit, nope, and I definitely don't want the recipe for the sauce."

He grinned and washed his bite down with a sip of wine. "Remind me when we go back up to the house. I actually think it's my mother's, which is truly scary because the woman can barely distinguish the stove from the dishwasher, so if you start to feel faint, you'll know why."

"Speaking of that-"

"Fainting?"

"Women, I was going to say," Kate clarified after being interrupted.

"One of my favorite topics, in case you were wondering," he said. "I consider myself something of an expert in the field."

"I never would've guessed that, Castle," she said, rolling her eyes. "I was actually thinking about a specific woman, though. Are you really planning on writing three more Nikki Heat books?" He didn't say anything right away, and she couldn't quite get a read on his expression.

"Are you asking me that because you don't want me to?" he said finally.

Kate could hear it in his voice, the hint of concern over what might follow, and she understood that feeling well. When he'd been offered the opportunity to write the next set of novels in another series, she'd worried about losing him, too. "No, Castle, I didn't mean for it to sound like that. Sometimes it's just strange to be the person on the page, that's all, even in an indirect way. I'm not sure that's something I'll ever get used to."

"I really hope you're not saying that because you don't believe what you've done and what you do is worthy of the tribute or the recognition, Kate. Look, I know you didn't ask for any of this. I know I threw myself into your life without considering whether or not you wanted me to be here, but I hope you understand how much I value this character, how enamored I am of this character, our character, and as long as she's in my hands, however long that is, I'll always do my best to honor you through her."

If the wing of a butterfly brushed against her skin in that moment, she was certain the tears would fall; that's how close he brought her. "Thank you, Rick. Thank you for saying that, and I know it's important to you. I really do," she said, clearing the lump of emotion from her throat.

"I know. It isn't easy, is it," he said.

"What isn't?"

"The whole first name thing," he answered amusingly. "I'm struggling with it, honestly."

She forced out a phony laugh. "Very funny, Castle."

"There you go. That's better. And just so you know, I'm also still struggling to process that dress you're wearing. Think the NYPD might entertain the idea of making that a regular uniform thing?"

"Why, because you're looking for more excuses not to do any actual work at work?"

Rick pulled his napkin from his lap and tossed it onto the table with pretended indignation. "Oh, you know what? For that, you owe me a dance. Up, up, up, come on," he insisted, pushing from his chair and reaching for her hand.

"You want to dance now? Here?"

"Yes, yes I do," he said. "You have somewhere else you need to be?" They were both standing, but neither had let go of the other.

"There's no music, Castle."

"And I was just about to fix that. Wait right here, please." He released her hand and ducked inside the pool house, returning a minute later to the sound of Sinatra spilling from the speakers overhead. "Music, ask and ye shall receive." Stepping into her, he wrapped an arm around her waist and her body conformed willingly.

"That's a neat trick, Castle. You just happened to have that all cued up and ready."

"No," he said, taking her hand with his other, "I had Vanilla Ice cued up and ready. I had to switch over to Ol' Blue Eyes. You're welcome." They began to move slowly with the music, their bodies unaccustomed to such proximity, yet inexplicably familiar. "I'm impressed. All that beer and wine today and you haven't stepped on my toes once," he wisecracked, trying, for her comfort, to keep the air light.

"You haven't given me reason to, yet," she quipped, her wedges affording her enough height to rest her chin just below his shoulder. His scent was different than it'd been that morning, less soap and more spice, but she had to be as close as she was in order to pick up its subtlety, and mixed with the whisper of wine on his breath, it was delightfully intoxicating. All at once, an unexpected boldness began to swirl inside her, and she could feel it as though it was some sort of liquid injection racing through her veins. "So, you like the dress, huh?" she asked at his ear, girlish yet glaringly far from it.

"No, I don't like it, I love it," Rick said, parroting her very response from the evening before, his fingers curling around the curve of her waist.

"I'm glad," she whispered as she pulled back and met his eye.

"Oh, this is very dangerous territory for me, Kate," he said after a long moment. "And God do I wish you understood what that meant."

"How do you know I don't?"

They'd stopped dancing but the music kept playing, their bodies still joined because neither had initiated otherwise. "What I know is that imagination is an enormous part of my world and that's the only place this moment has ever lived."

"What moment is that? The one where we eat grilled tuna by the pool? The one where Sinatra saves me from Vanilla Ice? Or the one where you ask me if you can kiss me because you finally realize I can't possibly give you signals more obvious than these?" she asked playfully in three sentences that practically rolled out as one with her buzz.

"Wow, those are all oddly specific guesses, but that last one comes the closest, I think."

"Just out of curiosity, which part did I get wrong?" she said, subtly wetting her lips.

"Just that, in my head, you're usually the one that asks me," he told her with audible satisfaction. "But, I'm certainly open to an alternate ending." He took a step back and slid his hands around hers. "I've had a wonderful day here with you, Kate, and tonight has been the perfect way to end it. I never could've-"

"I don't need the novel version, Castle. Can you please just kiss me already?"

"Habit, sorry," he said and he came for her.