The Tragic Story Of Uchiha Sasuke, Part 3: Spring Break

By: Vivien Xie

Here we find ourselves back into Sasuke's experience at WAFF (Willington's academy for fast food) and it's slowly getting better but not that much. So far: he bought a new Louis Vuitton man-purse, but got it stolen again (with ALL of his feminine needs), was doing badly in his classes by not having the ability to deep fry or grill any food, and was still having trouble finding any boys, or friends may I add. This college experience seemed like it wasn't going very well. But there was a reasonable escape from all this [extremely funny from our points of view madness. Spring break was coming up and Sasuke had chosen the perfect vacation spot:

South of France. Beautiful beaches, warm sunny weather, and tons of great rock climbing cliffs (man do I sound like an infomercial or WHAT?). So then our young ugly Sasuke packed his bags, and chose a plane ticket on United Airways to travel to his dream spot.

At the airport, there were soooo many ugly guys. Sasuke had to restrain himself. He knew what happened last time, and he wouldn't want to again. But it didn't work, when Sasuke went over to customs, this butt ugly guy was there, and he had the need to go through his wink-I like you-Mariah Carey phase. So he just did and the poor fellow passed out of fear. The security alarm rang, and Sasuke was convicted, being charged and had to give up his 3rd Louis Vuitton man-purse. He barely made his flight. Running through gate 7-C, he attempted to do a flip cause it looks cool in the matrix. But he fell on top of an old lady. Then the old lady started hitting him with her purse, which gave Sasuke marks, marks of pain remembering not to knock down old peoples.

In the plane, he scared all of the crewmembers with ugliness, and instead of being locked into a closet; he was locked into the storage bins above the seats. There he cried over losing his Louis Vuitton man-purse until the flight was over. The little girl under him didn't know that he was there, so when her mom went to get their carry on bags, Sasuke fell out. Because of his ugliness and well yeah, his ugliness, the little girl thought he was some type of monster and threw a flashlight at his head

With a generous bump on his head, Sasuke ran away from the plane, almost got hit by another, and finally made his way to the front of the airport. There he had to get a taxi, but once again, he couldn't get one because he scared the living daylights out of everyone. Sasuke then checked into his four seasons hotel, and fell asleep. The guy who comes in to give you breakfast came in, and saw Sasuke. He went Sacre bluer! And ran away as fast as he could. Then he decided he shouldn't stay in his hotel room all day, so he went to one of those cliff things to climb.

On his way there, he had no way of transportation. So he had to run all the way there, almost getting hit by the Tour de France. Once he was there, he scared off all the other climbers. He didn't really mind cuz he liked to have it by himself.

While he was climbing the big rock, he slipped and fell. As he was nearing his death he thought: o, y should this be happening to me? I have too much to live for! My man-purses, my "hideously good" looks, and my college experience as a fast food person!!!!!!. But his prayers were answered. He didn't fall into the Grand Rapids; he fell into a boat of models. But this wasn't right. They didn't pass out they actually liked him. Sasuke looked up and saw them. Since they did like him, he thought that this was at least someone, so girls weren't that bad. There was just seaweed covering his face. As Giselle Bunched, Heidi Klux, Naomi Campbell, and all the other models in the boat adored him, the seaweed fell off, and mostly all of them passed out. Then quickly some big security guy came and threw Sasuke out of the boat, onto the cliffs. Lucky throw he thought to himself. A few seconds later, he fell into an alligator pit, and once again, this gave him marks, marks of pain not to talk to models or just anybody else with dignity. As he went back to WAFF early, he decided to get a pet…

TO BE CONTINUED!!!!