A/N: Sorry for the wait. I hope you enjoy this chapter. I've sped ahead a bit, just so you know Seeley is now three. Reviews are always appreciated, feel free to give me any chapter prompts, too!


A crisp breeze sliced through the air as Daisy opened the front door and stepped down the small set of steps leading up to her house. One of Daisy's boot clad feet was pressed against the door, holding it open. She peeked back into the house, her eyes searching the living room for her son.

"Ready, buddy?" She called.

"I come," Seeley said and tottered towards the door. He slipped his gloved hand into Daisy's and happily followed her down the stairs.

When their feet met the soft grass Seeley walked in front of Daisy and guided her to the toy chest.

"We play soccer?"

"I'll do whatever you want today," Daisy said as she opened the toy chest and reached inside, sifting through various balls and outside toys. Her fingers finally made contact with the glossy cover of a soccer ball. She pulled it out and watched as Seeley's eyes lit up with pure happiness. "Soccer it is?" She asked.

Seeley nodded eagerly.

They spread a few feet apart and tapped the ball back and forth. A look of intense concentration took over Seeley's face, his small eyebrows furrowed as he watched the ball roll towards him.

Within an hour the chilly air had crept past their coats and gnawed at their skin. Daisy sent a pass near the two blocks of sidewalk they sometimes used as makeshift goal. Seeley chased after it, his laughter trailed behind him, carried by the wind. He caught up to the ball and stopped it with his toe before winding up his leg and swinging through. His foot just barely made contact, grazing the ball's side and sending it trickling toward the goal. The force and moment of the little kick caused Seeley to topple over. He plumped to the ground then looked up at Daisy and giggled.

"You see my kick?" Seeley asked as he pressed his palms against the grass and lifted himself up.

"It was great, I liked how fast you ran and how you got right back up when you fell."

Seeley smiled proudly, "Thanks mama," he looked up at her through big, happy brown eyes adorned with dark curls and rosy cheeks. He wrapped his arms around one of her legs and hugged it tightly. His chin pressed against her body as he looked up.

Daisy ruffled Seeley' hair. "How about you head inside and I'll meet you there, I don't want you to get too cold. I'll just put the ball away and then we'll have some dinner, okay?"

Seeley nodded and ran towards the steps. Daisy picked up the ball and walked around to the house's side. Just as her hand pushed the lid down, a startling scream pierced the air.

April 20th, 2018

Dear Lance,

It's almost been three years since you passed away. In some form I've accepted everything that's occurred and I can get through the day now. I know that I am strong enough to manage. Most days, to some extent, I am fine—functional at the least. I have our son, something I am forever grateful for. But every now and then I am overcome by a wave of sadness. It turns me inside out and I feel my heart twisting. Sometimes I feel so lost and I have no idea what to do. I wonder what happened to the cheerful, optimistic person I used to be. I find that I am no longer as talkative or outgoing. I am much more refined and withdrawn. I'm just so afraid. I don't want anything bad to happen. I'm afraid of getting too close to people and loving too hard because this pain, this separation, is something I don't think I could survive again. It's taken too much away from me and I don't know how much of the original Daisy I still have left. And I try to be her, that old me, for our son. I do my best to be the mother he needs me to be. It gets hard though and I feel like I'm doing something wrong. Lance, I need you here and although I know it's not possible I still hope that someday it will happen. Oh God, I'm sobbing again. I wonder when these tears will ever go away, will they ever stop? I hope they will. I know I won't stop missing you, in a way I don't want to, but I'm hoping that someday I will improve at managing the pain. I wish our son could meet you. I wish he had you right now. You could give him so much more than I can. I'm sorry I'm not doing all that I hoped I'd be able to and I'm sorry that I can't figure out what I'm doing wrong. I feel so hopeless, so desperate. I feel alone and I miss you. I love you. I am screaming out for you every day.

Lance, I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry. I'm writing from the hospital because I messed up and now our son is hurt and it's all my fault. You could do so much more for him, nothing I do ever feels like enough. It's as though he'll always be missing that piece of you. I didn't mean for it to happen. We were just outside. We were playing soccer. He's so good already, he must have gotten that from you. Seeley was headed to the front door and I was at the side of the house, tossing the ball into the toy chest. I had just closed the lid when I heard this scream- it was horrible. I ran to Seeley, he was crumpled at the base of the stairs. He looked so small and helpless. He just cried and cried and no matter what I did he wouldn't stop. There was nothing I could do to take away his pain, I just hugged him tightly, pressing his small form against me. I could feel the heave of his shoulders against my stomach, the tremble of his breath, his hot wet tears as they soaked my shirt. I don't know what I was doing wrong but I just couldn't get him to stop. I felt so worthless. What kind of mother am I if I can't even protect my son? If I can't take his pain away?

I kept him home for a little while with hopes that it would get better but he didn't stop crying. He wouldn't stop crying until he fell asleep on the couch, snuggled in my arms, terrified of moving his knee. I treated the gash on his forehead, right on his hairline. When he woke up the look in his eyes was so pained, so miserable that I knew I had to take him to a doctor immediately. That's where I am now. I'm in the waiting room as they're taking x-rays.

What am I doing wrong?

I'm scared, Lance. What if he's severely injured? I should have taken him in sooner. I should never have let him climb the stairs alone.

You would have done so much better, Lance. You would have been the best father, the better parent. You would have known how to make the tears stop. I need you, Lance. I need you more than anything but I know you're not coming back. You can't. It shatters my heart into thousands of tiny little, irreparable pieces, all in the shape of you. I wish you were here. It's times like this where I really don't know how I'm going to survive. How am I going to do it? I, oh, Lance, I have no idea…

Dr. Rowan entered the waiting room. As his eyes searched the plastic seats, he noticed a young woman, seated in the corner of the room, her legs tucked up toward her chest. Sobs racked her small frame.

"Parents of Seeley Sweets?" The doctor asked.

The woman dropped her pen in her purse and folded the letter. She glued her gaze to the floor, furiously wiping away the tears that had gathered, then spilled over. Spiraling out of control. She stood up and walked towards him, after taking a deep breath she finally looked up, meeting the doctor's eyes.

"Just me," she said, her voice was a hushed whisper, quivering, so very close to teetering over an edge. The doctor recognized the sound, it was the voice of a person who had lost someone, the voice of a person who was barely hanging on.

"Are you all right?" He asked gently, kindness radiated from his brown eyes.

Daisy nodded and took a shaky breath. "I'm such a mess, sorry."

Dr. Rowan shook his head sympathetically. "You have nothing to apologize for. I have a little girl about the same age as your son, I understand how scary it can be when they get hurt."

She sniffled. "I'm Daisy Wick."

"Nice to meet you, Ms. Wick. I'm Dr. Rowan," he said and extended his arm.

They shook hands briefly before carrying on.

"Do you have any news? On Seeley, I mean."

"He's all right," Dr. Rowan said and Daisy let out a sigh of relief. "We just finished the x-rays, and there are no fractures to his patella. The stitches went over well, just take him to your pediatrician in five days. The stitches will be examined and if everything looks good the doctor will remove them."

"May I see him?"

"Of course and you should be able to take him in a few minutes, the nurses are just finishing his paperwork," Dr. Rowan said and led Daisy to Seeley's room.

Hi, Lance. Sorry I had to stop in the middle of the letter, Seeley's doctor came. His name was Dr. Rowan and he took good care of Seeley. I'm feeling a little bit better, since there were no serious injuries, just three stiches on the cut I tried to treat earlier.

Seeley's asleep right now. He's snuggled next to me in bed because I don't want him alone tonight. Maybe I don't want to be alone either. His chest is rising and falling peacefully. He's so handsome, he looks so much like you.

Right now I crave your embrace more than anything, the strong reassuring squeeze that always made me feel better. I miss your arms around me and I miss wrapping my arms around you. I miss you. Generally when we were together I was happy, you had that effect on me, but do you remember some of the times I was really upset? You used to hold me and I would nuzzle my face against your neck and your shoulder as salty tears rolled down my cheeks. I was so vulnerable and you were sturdy ground, something I could hold on to. You were my anchor and now, without you I've gone adrift.

With love,

Daisy