Chapter 3-Love me fully

Serena stood in the middle of Bergdorf's trying to decide on a dress for her birthday, but she couldn't bring herself to care. Blair came out of the dressing room in a glittery green dress that emphasized her best features.

"Well, what do you think?" asked Blair as she twirled in place.

"It looks great."

"So, have you found anything yet?"

"No."

"Get off your ass, S. It's time to find you a sparkling party dress. Its not everyday that you turn 17."

"You're right, B. I just can't seem to get in the mood for it," replied Serena.

Blair grabbed her by the hand and led her into a different section of the department store. She started grabbing dresses from various racks before pushing her towards the dressing room to try on the clothes. Serena started to just get into it when she tried on the third dress.

"Well," asked Serena as she did little twirl.

"hmm," replied Blair while scrunching her nose.

"Too campy?"

"Definitely. Next dress, S."

Serena tried on two more before settling on one that passed the Serena/Blair stamp of approval. They spent the rest of the afternoon choosing all the right accessories. By lunch Serena was starting to feel a little more like herself. The dark cloud that seemed to be hovering over her was finally starting to lift.

"You're smiling again, S" Blair said.

"I have been sort of out of it," replied Serena.

"What's going?"

"It's just been a weird year."

Serena played with her soup before looking up at her friend and saying, "My dad's not coming tonight."

"Oh sweetie. Forget him. You're dad's a terd."

"Blair!"

"I'm sorry, I know he's your dad. But, he's still a terd."

Dan was fixing his tie when Vanessa peaked her head through his window.

"Hey," she shouted.

"Ugh, you really need to stop with the window things. I'm not Dawson and you are not a Joey."

"But's our thing," said Vanessa.

"No, its your thing."

Vanessa sprawled herself on Dan's bed and said, "So, what's with the get-up?"

"Its Serena's birthday party."

"Oh, I see."

"What does that mean?"

"Nothing."

"I know you V. That was not a nothing I heard in your tone. You've been really judgmental about Serena since you got back."

"No, I've been perfectly nice, Dan."

"No, you've been polite yet judgemental. Trust me I know judgy when I hear it. I've practically got it down to an art."

"I'm trying, I just. I don't like her."

"Finally, you speak the truth. I don't know what you have against her, but you're gonna have to figure out a way to deal cause she's my girlfriend and you're my friend and trust me you don't wanna choose."

"Its obvious you've already chosen, Humphrey," Vanessa said before climbing back down the fire escape.

Dan watched her walk away and shook his head. He had tried to keep his friendship afloat, but he felt like he was anchoring a ship all by himself. She wanted him to choose between her and Serena and that wasn't something he was willing to do. He once thought he loved her, but he knew it was an infatuation. It was an infatuation based on their close friendship. But, he was not going to risk his relationship with Serena in order to appease Vanessa's ego. He grabbed Serena's present and went to go pick her up.

"Hurry up, Serena. It's almost time to go," said Lily.

"I'll be out in a sec, mom."

Lily took another look at the time and wondered how daughter would cope with the little surprise that she'd arranged for tonight. Lily heard a soft tap at the door and went to answer.

"Hello, Dan."

"Hi, Mrs. Van Der Woodsen."

"Call me Lily."

Dan smiled up at her awkwardly and said, "Okay. Is Serena ready?"

"Give her a few more minutes."

Dan sat on the couch in the middle of the hotel room. He wasn't quite sure what to say to Lily. All of their previous encounters had been heated, but since the cotillion things had definitely changed. He was surprised at how nice she'd been. He was waiting for the other shoe to drop, but Lily was still being nice. Dating Serena had certainly altered his view of the Upper East Side. He still thought it was stuffy and far too concerned with appearance, but he'd realized that they had almost as many issues as regular people did. When he heard the click of high heels on the wood floor he turned to see Serena standing before him like a vision. She was wearing a short off-white dress that accentuated her curves in all the right places. She was nothing short of a vision.

"You look absolutely amazing," Dan said as she threw herself into his arms.

"Thank you,"she whispered.

"Happy Birthday, Serena."

"Ooh a present."

"Oh no you don't. This is for later."

"You're no fun," pouted Serena.

"Come on, pretty girl," he said as he wrapped his arm around her and followed Lily and Eric out of the hotel room.

Dan looked around at the ice-sculpture and wondered exactly what he was doing here. He had never been to an event this swanky in his entire life. Even the finger food looked to expensive to eat. As much as he loved being with Serena this part of her life intimidated him. He watched her as she greeted people of all ages and accepted their gifts with grace. Sometimes he liked to watch her from a distance and admire this girl. He could hardly believe that she was with him. It warmed him when she would steal glance and send a smile his way. Serena waved him over and he knew it was time to be by her side again.

"How's it going?" he asked.

"Good, but what were you doing all the way back there?"

"I just wanted to give you some time with your guests."

"I don't need time with them. I want to spend it with you too"

He placed a kiss on her cheek and said, "So do I?"

A shiver went down her spine as she read the look in his eyes. It was the look that said he just wanted to spend hours discovering her in all the right places. Ever since Christmas, the relationship had only intensified. Serena had been with other boys before, but with them it was simple carnal lust. Being Dan was like being carried on to a different plane. She shivered with sweet anticipation of being with him again. He was sweet and attentive lover. With Dan she felt cherished and loved.

"Let's go," whispered Serena.

"What about your guests?"

"Screw them"

Dan laughed a hearty laugh and followed Serena as she led him down the long corridor to an empty room that Blair's mother only used when she had business meetings. Serena locked the door and started slipping Dan's jacket from his shoulders as he held tightly to her waist. She kissed him as he rubbed her back gently and guided them towards the couch.

"You smell so good," whispered Dan.

"Thanks. You look so hot in that suit. All I've wanted to do is get you out of it," she confessed.

"Really?"asked Dan as he ran his finger along her neck while his other hand found the zipper to her dress and slowly undid it.

"Uh huh."

He slid his hand inside her dress and caressed her bare back.

"You're not wearing a bra?"

"Nope. I don't need one for this dress."

"You're gorgeous," he whispered.

"Shut up and kiss me," Serena demanded as she hooked her arms around his shoulders.

He kissed the spot at the base of her neck that drove her crazy as he continued to run his palm across her naked back. Serena pushed him down on the couch, letting her dress fall to floor before she straddled him. He kissed her feverishly. The scent of her nearly drove him over the edge. Serena loved to look at him when he kissed her. The way he looked at her was nearly as thrilling as the feel of his skin. He had this intense way of looking at her when they were like this that made her feel like she could do anything.

She lifted her head and said, "you have too many clothes on."

Serena removed his tie and threw it on top of her dress. She unbuttoned his shirt and slipped it off his shoulders. She kissed along his chest until she could hear him gasping breath. Dan ran his fingers through her long hair as she slowly worked her way down to his pants. He wanted her right than and there, but he had to patient. One thing he'd learnt from Serena was that sex was never any good when it was rushed. Serena slid his pants off and let it join the rest of the clothes on the floor.

Dan kissed along her neck and fondled one perk breast with one hand and used the other to flip her over so that he was looking down at her.

"So, its going to be that way," she laughed.

"It is your birthday after all."

Dan kissed along her navel and slid her panties off throwing them to the side. He kissed along her inner thigh. Serena wriggled, as he got closer to his destination.

The anticipation was killing her. They'd long ago surpassed their roles as student and teacher. He'd quickly graduated from virgin boyfriend to skillfull lover. She laid her head back on the cushions as he did unspeakable things with his tongue.

"I can't take it anymore, Dan."

"Alright."

He moved slowly up her body and entered in one swift motion. Serena closed her eyes and wrapped her legs around his waist. Dan looked right at her as he moving inside her. She met him thrust for thrust. Her breath caught in her throat as he swept her hair from her face and whispered, "I love you," before collapsing on top of her.