Fifteen, spring
Fifteen feels different than fourteen. It feels – like he's holding his breath and waiting for something, but he's not sure of what.
Perhaps it was the thought of starting high school in a few weeks that had him feeling so restless – everyone he knew was going to Jeguk, and his parents had made a donation to the library. Tan's mother had personally invited all of the parents to a welcoming seminar and spoke at length about the achievements and amenities her school provided. There had an enviable list of accolades printed out in the brochure, more impressive considering the short history the school had.
His mother comes home with a twenty page brochure, his new school uniform, and plenty of gossip. He learned which mother had gotten plastic surgery, how much the new auditorium was going to cost, and when drop off times were – though according to his mother, with the amount of fees Jeguk was charging, a private limo service should have been included.
His mother stops talking when she sees the expression on his face. "Don't worry, you'll be fine. All your friends are going to be there and it'll just be like middle school!"
Myung Soo hopes his mother is wrong in that regard, because the last few months of middle school were awful.
First, Tan and Bo Na had split up, and if the atmosphere was awkward before, it became nearly impossible afterwards. There seemed to be an undeclared line drawn through the school – Tan or Bo Na. Rachel was on Tan's side, naturally, and Myung Soo felt it was expected for him to be on Bo Na's side as she was his first love – but he remembered the way they looked strolling hand in hand around school like no one else existed, and he wasn't proud of it but his heart was a petty thing.
Young Do took no one's side, and only rolled his eyes when Bo Na confronted him about it. "Did he promise you things? Did he say he was going to love you forever? If he didn't, then where was the harm done?"
Bo Na reeled back as if Young Do had physically attacked her. "You're the worst, Choi Young Do," she hissed. "You'll never know what love is like!"
Young Do rubbed his brow. "Why does everyone keep on saying that to me? As if I'm to blame for their failures."
"She didn't even notice I was here," Myung Soo said mournfully. "It's like I'm invisible."
Young Do looked at him in annoyance. "All these feelings over Lee Bo Na. And you say love is something I want to happen to me?"
Bo Na's mood swings contrasted with Tan's calm. Aside from a few days where he looked tired and paler than normal, the loss of Bo Na from his side didn't seem to affect him at all. It infuriated Bo Na and made Myung Soo wonder – what exactly was underneath Tan's placid exterior.
Maybe he hadn't been in love with Bo Na at all.
It wasn't any of his business, really.
Bo Na returned all of his pictures in a black portfolio – like your heart and told him that in a few more years, there'd be a job opportunity at Mega Entertainment. "That is, if you want it," she said with a toss of her hair. "My father said you had a good eye."
"They were a gift," he said and pushed the portfolio back at her. "Really. I insist."
He's not so naïve anymore.
Eun Sang remarks on the changes in his personality when they meet in front of the convenience store. Young Do's inside, buying something – probably ramyun, and they're waiting for him outside.
"Is everything all right? You seem quieter these days."
He shrugs. "I've had a lot on my mind lately." He looks at her. "How are you feeling?"
Eun Sang gifts him with a small smile. "Better. I've been sleeping well, thanks to that tea you gave me."
"Let me know when you need more." Myung Soo says. He notices the tag to her shirt is sticking out, and reaches out to tuck it back in, when Eun Sang shifts away, avoiding his touch.
Ah, there was that new development.
"Cha Eun Sang, I thought we were fine," he says as he puts his hand back into his pocket.
Her slightly apologetic look only confirms the opposite. "Or maybe we're not."
"Myung Soo-ah," Eun Sang says, then bites her lip. "I'm fine, really, I am."
"I'm sorry that was your first kiss," Myung Soo blurts out. "But I don't know what I can do to fix things."
"Fix what?" Young Do drawls. He comes toward them, a banana milk in one hand and a lollipop in the other. A black plastic sack swings from his arm. He hands the banana milk to Eun Sang.
"Nothing," Eun Sang says quickly and takes the drink from him. "Let's go."
Young Do grunts agreeably, the lollipop already in his mouth. He glances over at Myung Soo, who falls in line next to him, his expression a veritable rain cloud.
"Myung Soo, what's with that face?"
Eun Sang's father slipped into a coma not long after she had texted him the news. He passed away two weeks later.
He and Young Do both attended the second day of the funeral. Yoon Chan Young had been there with his father, and when he spotted Myung Soo with Choi Young Do, his eyebrows nearly hit his hairline. Eun Sang hadn't even looked at them, she was too busy supporting her mother and her sister, who were both weeping copiously. Eun Suk noona had cut her hair drastically short and looked like she hadn't slept for days. Dark shadows ringed her eyes and she would pause every few minutes to blow her nose. Eun Sang's mother looked completely devastated. She made distressed noises and dabbed at her eyes, while Eun Sang patted her back and said "Eomma. Eonni. Let it all out."
Chan Young finally made his way over to him and steered him by the elbow to a remote corner. "Jo Myung Soo, what is Choi Young Do doing here?"
"He's Eun Sang's friend too," Myung Soo protested. "She didn't tell you that?"
Chan Young was startled. "No, she didn't. You being here is fine – but I just don't know –"
"You can't judge him by his father, if that's what you're going by," Myung Soo said furiously. "I mean, his father's terrifying. But Young Do's not his father."
Chan Young looked at him doubtfully. "Maybe so. But how do you explain that incident at Kim Tan's birthday party? He dumped food all over a guest simply because the boy said something he didn't agree with."
"That was a misunderstanding." Myung Soo said defensively. "Besides, Dong Suk had it coming. He was making up lies about Zeus Group."
"I see you'll be a good lawyer for them, when you get older," Chan Young said in disgust. "Your friend is a bully, and that's the truth."
"Eun Sang doesn't think so, and don't you think she should decide? I can't make you like Young Do, but you can't choose who Eun Sang is friends with, either."
"Yah, Jo Myung Soo," Chan Young said. "Don't you think you're going too far?"
"You should ask that of yourself," Myung Soo retorted. "I'm going to talk to Eun Sang."
He couldn't find her. He circled the room, running into Young Do, who was holding a plate of food and looking extremely uncomfortable. "Where have you been?"
"Defending your honor. Where's Eun Sang?" Myung Soo tugged at his tie. It suddenly felt too tight.
"I don't know – I turned around and she was gone. This is her food," Young Do said. "Do you think she ran away?"
"She wouldn't do that," Myung Soo murmured. "At least, I hope not."
"You go look outside and I'll go check the hallway." Young Do set the plate down.
The sky, which had been threatening rain all morning, carried through as soon as he stepped outside. There was the clap of thunder, and then it was as if the world collapsed under water – the rain fell thick and fast.
Myung Soo cursed under his breath and peered through the rain. Where was that girl?
He ran and called her name. "Cha Eun Sang! Eun Sang! Yah, where are you?"
He saw a blurry figure duck into the alleyway and he chased after it. "Cha Eun Sang!"
It was her. She looked back at him incredulously, her eyes enormous in her pale white face. Rain had plastered her hair to her face and neck, making her look half-drowned.
Myung Soo pushed his sodden fringe off his face. "Yah, Cha Eun Sang. What's wrong?"
Eun Sang laughed, but it sounded more like a sob. "Really, Myung Soo?"
"I mean, besides your father being dead," Myung Soo said, then winced. "I mean –"
"Go away," Eun Sang said. "I don't want you to see me like this."
"Like what?"
"This," Eun Sang said, and flung out her arms. "Helpless, weak, whatever – all of it."
"I never thought you were weak," Myung Soo said. He stepped closer, cautiously. "Where did you get that idea?"
"I feel—" Eun Sang trailed off. "I feel like that. Ever since Appa died. Eomma and Eonni are so sad, all the time and I can't do anything about it. And I feel like there's something wrong with me, because I can't cry. My father's dead. I should be crying, right?"
Eun Sang's fists were balled in her hanbok. "Why am I not crying? I feel like there's something broken—" and she hit her chest. "What's wrong with me, Myung Soo?"
"Nothing," Myung Soo said. He stood toe to toe with her and wrapped his arms around her. "There's nothing wrong with you."
Eun Sang stood stiffly in his embrace then slowly relaxed. "How am I going to let him go?" She pressed her head against Myung Soo's chest. "How can I say good bye?"
She sighed, and it made his chest ache. "I don't know," he said honestly. "It's different for everyone."
Eun Sang pulled away. "Thank you Myung Soo."
"If you ever need anything," Myung Soo said, and Eun Sang nodded. "I know."
She looked up at him, and then smiled. "Have you grown taller?" Eun Sang shook her head disapprovingly. "Jo Myung Soo, who gave you permission to grow so tall?"
It was strange, how warm he suddenly felt – he knew the truth of rain hitting against his skin, dripping from his hair and eyelashes, but when Eun Sang smiled, none of it mattered. He felt warmth from the tips of his ears to the soles of his feet. He had missed her smile.
Myung Soo raised his hand to brush her cheek. "You saw Young Do right? He's sprouted like a tree."
Eun Sang wrinkled her nose. "I enjoyed being taller than you. Now I have to catch up."
"I'm sure if you put your mind to it, you can do anything, Cha Eun Sang." Myung Soo grinned at her.
Eun Sang raised up on her tip toes and placed her hands on his shoulders. "Is that a dare?'
She was so close – he could see the beauty mark on her nose and under her eyebrow. He inclined his head toward hers. "Maybe?"
"Yah! Where have you two been?" Young Do's shout startled them both. Eun Sang tipped forward and Myung Soo reached out to catch her.
Their faces met, Eun Sang's mouth mashed against his bottom lip. He froze. Eun Sang's eyes widened and she pushed him away.
"Eun Sang!"
She gave him the briefest of looks, then ran off. Young Do stepped aside when he saw her.
Myung Soo ran toward him. "Why didn't you stop her?"
Young Do shoved a plastic umbrella at him. "Yah, Jo Myung Soo, what's with that face?"
Myung Soo touched his bottom lip. "Did you see?"
Young Do sneered. "See what? Let's go."
They walked back to the funeral home in silence. Myung Soo tried to engage Young Do in conversation, but the other boy remained silent until they reached the entrance.
"I'm surprised at you," Young Do said. "It's her father's funeral, what were you thinking?"
"It's not like that," Myung Soo protested. "It was an accident."
"So how are you going to fix it?" Young Do sounded almost angry. "Do you have a plan?"
"It just happened. I don't know what I'm going to do. Why do you care?"
"I don't," Young Do spat out the words. "I just don't want difficulties in my life."
He collapsed the umbrella and handed it to Myung Soo. "I'm going to leave first."
Chan Young had yelled at him for letting Eun Sang stay out in the rain. It seemed pointless to wait for her, so he went home.
Myung Soo pulled out his phone on the ride back.
"I'm sorry," he texted. "I'm sorry."
"That was my first kiss," came the reply, and Myung Soo groaned.
"I'm really really really sorry."
"It's not your fault. I was there too."
"So we're fine?"
"Yes."
Which clearly was a big lie, Myung Soo thinks irritably as they settle into their seats. Eun Sang sits between Young Do and Myung Soo, and turns off her phone. Myung Soo scoops a handful of popcorn and passes the tub to her. Eun Sang takes it and skims the top, then hands it to Young Do. He declines and sinks back into his seat.
The lights dim, and the beginning credits play on the screen.
Two hours later, they leave the movie theater. "What did you think?" Myung Soo asks. Eun Sang yawns and flips her hood over her head. "It's so obvious that there's going to be a second movie. I mean, they can't just leave the bridge smashed like that. And Loki's still alive."
"Plus he just leaves Jane there," Myung Soo says. "Who leaves a girl that looks like that behind?"
"Apparently the god of thunder does," Young Do says. "But there was Lady Sif waiting for him back at home."
Myung Soo snorts. "Don't tell me you think Thor's going to fall for Sif."
Young Do grins. "I've never been interested in the obvious endings."
"Jane and Thor were in love!" Myung Soo says loudly, causing passerby to look at them strangely. Eun Sang ducks her head and Young Do mutters, "Aish, this kid."
"Well, they are," Myung Soo insists. "What do you think, Eun Sang?"
"I'm happy that Thor could reconcile with his father," Eun Sang says simply. At the mention of fathers, Young Do's expression hardens while Myung Soo goes quiet.
They walk Eun Sang to her bus stop and wait. "You two are starting Jeguk in a couple of weeks right?" Eun Sang asks.
"Yeah," Young Do says. "Tan-ah's mother sweet talked all our parents into going to her school. My father proposed a work-study program in connection with Zeus."
"My mother talked to the other mothers and they're building a study room for us." He looks at Eun Sang and says, "You can use it too. You and Chan Young."
"Thanks for the offer, but I think I'll be too busy traveling to my new high school. And I just got a new job."
"Which number is this one? Three, four?" Young Do raises an eyebrow. "Are you trying to buy a house, Cha Eun Sang?"
"I wish," Eun Sang sighs. "No, the rent on our apartment is due soon, and my mother just sent my sister money for the new semester."
"I told you, you could come wash dishes with me," Young Do says casually. "You'd be making more than minimum wage."
"I already wash dishes."
"These are better dishes."
"Oh, says your royal highness?"
Myung Soo steps in before they start arguing in earnest. "On the weekends, you can come use the study room, if you can't make it during the week. I'll be there."
Eun Sang looks at him thoughtfully, and then she nods. "Okay."
Myung Soo exhales. "Good, and you can meet our friends."
Eun Sang gets a mischievous look on her face. "Oh, will I get to meet the famous Lee Bo Na?"
"Ah, how can you say her name so easily, she broke my heart," Myung Soo says, and drapes his arm over his face dramatically. Young Do rolls his eyes. "Here we go."
To Myung Soo's shock, Eun Sang reaches out and pats his hand. "It's okay, Myung Soo. There will be other girls."
"Don't encourage him," Young Do says bemusedly.
"Quiet, you. I think it's cute that our Myung Soo believes in love so strongly," Eun Sang says. Her expression brightens. "I almost forgot. I have presents for the two of you."
She fishes in her pockets and brings out two friendship bracelets. "I've had them for a while, but I figured since you two are going to Jeguk, it would be a good start to the new school year." She motions at them. "Hold out your hands."
Myung Soo sticks out his palm eagerly. Young Do hesitates for a moment before he does the same.
Eun Sang places a yellow, white and blue bracelet in Myung Soo's outstretched hand. Young Do gets a red, black, and orange bracelet.
"There you go," Eun Sang says, suddenly shy. "I know it's not much, but –"
"Daebak," Myung Soo crows, and slips his on immediately. "No one's ever made me anything before, they always just buy it."
He slings an arm around her and squeezes. "Thank you, Cha Eun Sang."
"Thank you," Eun Sang says gratefully. "Both of you. For the past few months."
"It's fine," Young Do says gruffly. "Your bus is here, you should go."
Myung Soo waves at the bus until he can no longer see it. He turns to Young Do, who is still staring at the bracelet.
"Well put it on," Myung Soo says. "Do you need help?"
Young Do closes his fingers over it and sticks it in his pocket. "It doesn't go with what I'm wearing," he says cheekily. "I see you two are fixed up."
"Until Eun Sang decides she's going to be embarrassed all over again," Myung Soo says. "But I'll take this as a good sign."
Fifteen, the day before the first day of school
Myung Soo wakes up when his phone alarm goes off right by his ear, and he struggles with his sheets before finally flinging them off. He blinks blearily and looks at the time. Six thirty am. It takes him thirty minutes to wash up, dress, eat breakfast and then he's out of the house, camera in hand.
Even though most things aren't open until ten or so, he likes the mornings in his neighborhood. Everything is still and quiet, and he hears the sounds of birds chirping to one another. He likes strolling down the paved streets and seeing the different styles of architecture.
Sometimes he wonders what it would be like if he grew up in a different house, a different family. If he lived like Eun Sang and Chan Young did.
It's a hard idea to grasp.
When he gets home, he checks his phone. There's a message from Eun Sang.
"Chan Young is going to Jeguk with you, be sure to look out for him."
He shakes his head. "This is Yoon Chan Young we're talking about. He's probably better prepared than I am."
"You're right, but look out for him anyway?"
"Thanks for your faith, Cha Eun Sang."
"At least you'll be going to school with people you know. I don't know anyone at my school."
"Are you ready for school?"
Eun Sang sends a line of frowning faces and Myung Soo laughs.
"Let's get together after this week is over."
"Deal."
Fifteen, first day of school
Eun Sang bolts out of bed at five thirty in the morning. She nearly slips on her way to the bathroom, but manages to grab a hold of the wall.
The cold water is a shock, and she shrieks before she remembers her mother is still sleeping. The bathroom door bangs open and her mother looks at her worriedly.
"Co-co-old, Eomma," Eun Sang says, her teeth chattering together. Her mother signs, "Did you forget to turn on the heat again?"
"Can you do it?"
"Silly girl."
Eun Sang hugs herself and waits until the frigid water warms up and washes away the goose bumps on her skin.
Breakfast is a hurried affair, she chokes down an orange and half a bowl of rice. Eun Sang hugs her mother and kisses her on the cheek. "Have a good day at work, Eomma! I have to catch the bus."
Eun Sang is out the door before she can see her mother sign, "Have a good first day."
Her feet fly up the flight of stairs that leads to the main road, and Eun Sang runs toward the bus stop.
"Chan Young, it's time to wake up." Jae Ho walks down the hallway to Chan Young's bedroom and knocks on it. "It's not a good idea to be late on your first day."
No answer. Jae Ho opens the door and sees the bed is neatly made. Chan Young comes out from his bathroom, dressed in the Jeguk uniform. He tugs on the sleeves self-consciously. "I look like a character out of a comic book," he complains. "No one I know dresses like this."
"It's the style I've heard," his father says. "You look sharp. Very handsome." He gives Chan Young a thumbs up. "Here, let's take a picture for Eun Sang."
Chan Young makes a horrified grimace just as his father clicks the camera button on his phone.
"Yah, Chan Young," his father chides. "I thought you were fine about attending Jeguk."
Chan Young shrugs. "I am. I just – I don't know about the other kids."
"You have your mother's charm and my good looks," Jae Ho says exasperatedly. "How can you not make friends easily?"
"I'd rather go to the high school Eun Sang is going to," Chan Young says. "I miss her already."
"I told you, you can't go to the high school Eun Sang is going to now, unless you want to wear a wig and talk in a high voice for three years," Jae Ho says. "When she and Park-sshi moved, the best school in the area is the all-girls high school."
"Too bad she can't come to Jeguk with me," Chan Young says. "It'd be nice to have a friend already."
"Don't you know some of the kids already – the son of Seungri Law Firm? What's his name?"
"Jo Myung Soo. He's nice enough."
"There you are, a friend –" and when the expression on Chan Young's face doesn't change, Jae Ho laughs. "Perhaps I have been taking work home with me. Chan Young, I know those kids aren't like us, and that you're not comfortable with them, but the world is full of different kinds of people. And part of growing up is learning how to get along with people you don't necessarily like."
"Are you telling me to lie, Appa?" Chan Young crossed his arms.
"No, I'm telling you what my father told me and your grandfather told him. Learn all you can and try to find one good thing about a person and that can help you understand them. Bear with it, Chan Young."
"All right." Chan Young sighs. "What's for breakfast?"
Jae Ho rubs his hands together in anticipation. "I've been experimenting. What do you think about pancakes?"
Chan Young sniffs, then his eyes widen in alarm. "Is that them burning now?"
Eun Sang gets the picture notification as she's walking onto the school campus. Curious, she clicks accept, then bursts into laughter at the sight of Chan Young's cross eyed frog face.
"Wishing you a good first day of school, from Chan Young and Chan Young's papa."
She takes a selca of herself with a victory sign by her left eye and sends it as a reply.
"Chang Young, fighting!"
Young Do wakes before his alarm goes off. He pulls on a long robe and then opens his door, looking both ways. The house feels empty, but that's because the morning staff have yet to arrive. He walks toward his mother's room and knocks lightly.
"Eomma?" he calls out. "Eomma, are you awake?"
"Young Do Ah?" The door opens a crack and his mother peers out at him. Her face is pale and there's a fragility to her features that didn't exist before. She brightens at the sight of him, and pulls him toward her. "Ah, today is a special day, right? The first day of school."
"Eomma, are you all right? Maybe I should stay home today." Young Do gently steers her to a chair and sits her down.
She cups his face. "Don't be ridiculous. It's the first day of high school. You need to go."
"It's just the same kids I've known forever," Young Do mutters. "We'll probably see each other for the rest of our lives."
"That's why it's important to make friends. You don't bring anyone home."
"Would you bring someone here to this house?" Young Do jerks away. "Anyway, I have all the friends I need."
"How is Tan-ah?"
"Strange – I'll see him later though. Eomma, are you sure you don't need me to stay?"
"Eomma will be waiting for you when you get home. Don't worry about me."
"I can't help it," Young Do says, and his mother wraps her arms around him. "Let me get ready, and I'll make you breakfast. Does that sound good?"
Young Do's smile is as clear and wide as the sky.
The first person Chan Young sees at Jeguk is Kim Tan. His father's car has pulled up behind Tan's car, and Tan is standing awkwardly outside of it when Chan Young gets out.
Tan actually bows toward Chan Young's father and turns to look at him. "Hello, I'm Kim Tan."
Chan Young remembers his father's words and tries to smile. "I know. I'm Yoon Chan Young."
"It's nice to meet you."
Tan obviously has no recollection of him at all. Chan Young sighs. "It's nice to meet you too."
Myung Soo is walking to his locker to put away his books for his first class, when Bo Na grabs his arm. "Who is that?"
"Hello to you too," Myung Soo gripes, and looks at where Bo Na is pointing. "Oh, it's just Yoon Chan Young."
"You know him?" Bo Na's voice drops into a whisper. "How? I've never seen him before. Is he new money? Is he a transfer student? Who is he?"
"Why do you want to know so bad?" Myung Soo asks, then looks at her closely. "Yah, Lee Bo Na, what's wrong with your eyes?"
Bo Na is looking at Chan Young in the same way she used to look at Tan, but there's something else – something flowery about the way she gazes at Chan Young.
Myung Soo shudders. "Never mind."
"Introduce me to him," Bo Na orders.
"Never," Myung Soo says. "Chan Young is too innocent for the likes of you."
"Yah, what's that supposed to mean? Jo Myung Soo!" She stomps her foot.
At lunch, Eun Sang gets her tray from the lunch lady and brings it back to her seat. Everyone else is paired off or sitting in groups, and she feels conspicuous eating by herself. She plugs in her earphones and looks at her phone.
Chan Young writes back, "Our Eun Sang is too cute. Such a waste at a girl's school."
Myung Soo sends a text as well – "Eun Sang, why are you sending cute pictures to Chan Young and not me?"
Even Young Do sends a message. "How was it?"
"Dear kids," she types. "It was like being thrown into a zoo. I don't know half of these things the girls care about, so I will need to study extra hard. Also, what is an A-Pink?"
"Oppa will help you. A-Pink is a girl group. Bo Na knows them. Do you want an autograph?"
Eun Sang snorts. She texts back. "What oppa?"
"Are you calling me Oppa now, Cha Eun Sang? I'm touched."
Eun Sang's eyes widen. She had accidentally sent her reply to Young Do instead of Myung Soo.
"What are you doing, calling Choi Young Do your Oppa?"
Chan Young's text comes a minute later. Eun Sang buries her face in her hands.
"Are you all sitting together or something?"
"No. Myung Soo is just really loud."
Eun Sang spends the remainder of her lunch texting the boys.
Fifteen, Summer
Myung Soo thinks there should have been a sign, or something obvious, but one day Kim Tan is there, and then the next day he isn't. And isn't for a week, and then a month, until Rachel informs them that Tan got accepted into a school in California, and was going to continue his education in America.
Myung Soo's surprised that Rachel, of all people knows more about Tan than him or Young Do. Even Young Do's surprised by the announcement, but then his face carefully goes blank.
He's worried about Young Do.
He doesn't eat with them anymore, and spends most of his time in the company of two lesser known families – boys that he wouldn't have bothered with if Tan was still there. They weren't even third stringers, but maybe fourth and fifth hopefuls. Their fathers run hospitals or banks, he can't remember.
With Young Do spending his free time with his new friends – Myung Soo's become friendlier with Chan Young, who has adapted to Jeguk remarkably well. He also spends time with Lee Hyo Shin, a student a year ahead of them. Hyo Shin sunbae is cool and collected, and exactly the type of person he wished he could be. He's smart, calm and can recall the different constitutional referendums and case files with complete ease. When he invites Hyo Shin for dinner, his mother practically fawns over him.
"We're big admirers of your parents," his mother says, and his father nods. "Yes, the precedents your father has set are quite impressive."
Hyo Shin nods and smiles and makes polite conversation, but Myung Soo sees the effort it takes.
He touches Hyo Shin's shoulder as the older boy gets ready to leave. "Sunbae, are you all right? Did my parents upset you?"
Hyo Shin's gaze softens and he shakes his head. "Your parents didn't upset me. I had a good time tonight, really."
"If you're sure," Myung Soo says uncertainly. He thinks he sees the edge of a bandage underneath Hyo Shin's sleeve, but he's not sure.
Hyo Shin sees him looking and pulls up his sleeve. "I burned myself by accident," he says. "Trying to make tea."
"Oh, was that the reason?" Myung Soo says. "Well, be careful next time, sunbae."
"I will," Hyo Shin says. "Thank you for inviting me to your home."
Fifteen, fall
He tells Eun Sang about it later, and how strangely final it sounded – which was ridiculous, because of course Sunbae would be around, but then summer vacation draws to an end, and fall semester begins, and Hyo Shin is out.
"There's been a death in the family," Bo Na says to him at break time. She's sitting with Kang Yesol, the new girl, whose parents run a health spa or something to do with mineral water. "Sunbae and his family are in mourning, and he'll be back after a few weeks."
"Why does everyone know everything except me," Myung Soo mutters. "Even Eun Sang knows more and she doesn't even go here."
At the mention of Eun Sang's name, Bo Na's face darkens. "Myung Soo, don't talk about that girl. She's the reason Chan Young won't go out with me. I hate her."
"Are you still trying to get his attention? I thought you'd given up by now." Yesol says.
"Chan Young is worth my time and effort," Bo Na seethes. "He's a perfect gentleman. And a complete idiot," and her face crumples.
"Bo Na," Yesol chides. "I thought we talked about this."
"I know," Bo Na cries. "I've tried to ignore him. But I can't. He's Chan Young!"
"What makes him so different from Kim Tan?" Myung Soo says, his interest piqued. "You've never liked anyone as much as you did Tan."
Bo Na rolls her eyes. "That's so in the past. Keep up will you? Chan Young," and she ticks off the reasons one by one, "is incredibly intelligent, kind, a good conversationalist, and he has really pretty eyes. And he's so cute when he smiles, oh, and his hair –"
"Is on his head?" Myung Soo guesses. Bo Na swats at him. "Yah! Jo Myung Soo, jealousy doesn't become you."
"I'm not jealous of Chan Young." Myung Soo scoffs. "I'm just surprised that you're trying so hard."
"Because it's Chan Young! I don't understand him. I buy him things, he gives them back. I tell him he's cool, he just thanks me and walks away. I tell him Eun Sang is a gold digging opportunist, he gets angry at me. I don't get it. What's wrong with him?"
"Really, seriously, Lee Bo Na?"
"She's not even that pretty," Yesol chimes in. "I mean, I guess she's pretty for a poor girl."
"Yah, that is my best friend you're talking about," Myung Soo says sharply. He stands up. "Lee Bo Na, I'm no longer surprised why Chan Young doesn't want to date you. I'm surprised I wanted to date you once."
"Wait, what?" Bo Na looks at him curiously. "You wanted to date me?"
"That's so in the past," Myung Soo parrots back at her. "Keep up will you?"
He walks off.
"What's his problem," Yesol says. She peers at Bo Na. "Are you crying?"
"No," Bo Na snaps, and rubs at her face furiously. "The air is just very moist in this lounge."
Myung Soo pulls out his phone. He finds Young Do's number and fires off a quick message.
"Bastard, where are you?"
If he hits back, he'll be punished. If he does nothing, nothing will change. Eomma is still gone, her closet empty, the drawers naked as well. Nothing is left.
"Eomma will be waiting for you when you get home. Don't worry about me."
Mothers aren't supposed to lie to their children.
He skipped the last class of the day because he felt something off – and when he came home, he scared the maid, who was cleaning up his mother's room.
"Where is she?" He usually doesn't touch the servants – doesn't even look at them really, but when he saw her with the vacuum and the cleaning cloths, he just knew.
"Where is my mother?"
The maid steps back, fear in her eyes. "Young Master, I don't know."
"Liar," he spits and pushes her away. "Why are you cleaning?"
"Your father requested that I do so."
"Of course. Of course he would." Young Do laughs. "He can do whatever he wants, but everyone else just cleans up after him."
He stalks over to his mother's table and picks up the paperweight. It is heavy and made of polished marble.
Young Do is tired of doing nothing.
He takes the paperweight with him when he goes to his father's study. It has heft, it's the perfect size – and he hurls it at the double doors.
The wood cracks and splinters. There is a thunk, and then a crash. His father's favorite vase has just met an untimely end.
Heavy footsteps, and then his father's enraged face looks through the destroyed doors.
Young Do smiles, and clenches his fists. "Where is Eomma?"
If he hits back, nothing will change.
"Aish, where are you?" Eun Sang checks her watch and looks at the bus schedule again. Her bus is late – which is unheard of. There must have been an accident or the bus driver was refueling. She has a mountain of homework to get through, and she still needs to pick up some groceries for her mother.
She quickly sends a text. "Eomma, I'm sorry, the bus is late. I will be late coming home."
"Take your time. I'm still at my new job. There are left overs in the refrigerator."
Eun Sang frowns. Her mother's new job as a personal house keeper to the wife of Jeguk Group – Chan Young's father set it up, and it means an hour and a half commute every morning for her mother. A Jeguk car dropped her off every night.
She hadn't told Myung Soo or Young Do about it, as her plan was to make enough money so her mother could get another job, closer to where they lived. It was kind of Chan Young's father, but she wanted her family to have nothing to do with Jeguk. Chan Young didn't say much, but she knew he was having a difficult time. And that annoying girl Lee Bo Na certainly didn't help matters.
Her phone beeps. She glances down – a text from Young Do.
Help me.
Eun Sang immediately dials his number. "Where are you?"
"By your house." Young Do's voice sounds weak. "By the street light."
"Stay there," Eun Sang orders. "I'm coming."
She runs and waves wildly at an oncoming taxi. It stops and she climbs in.
"You need to go to the hospital," Eun Sang said gently, as she taped down a piece of gauze. "What if I'm not here? Or if Myung Soo's not around?"
"I don't like hospitals," Young Do said thickly. "The smells – the dying people. Besides, he never hits me that seriously."
"This looks serious to me," Eun Sang scolded him. "And you always bruise in the same places."
"Why ruin a winning formula?" Young Do winced. "Besides, I like you playing nurse."
"Yah, I'm tired of cleaning off your blood everywhere," Eun Sang said. "The last time you came over, that blouse? I can't wear it anymore."
"I'll buy you another," Young Do offered, then scowled when Eun Sang pressed hard against the wound. "Aish, what was that for?"
"You don't need to buy me things," Eun Sang said. "I prefer you not being beaten up instead."
"So I won't come for the small things," Young Do said. "I can fix those on my own. But if I really need help—"
"I didn't say you needed to stop coming. If you need a place to run away to, then it might as well be here, Choi Young Do."
"Really?" Young Do smiled at her. "You promise?" He held up his pinky.
"Elementary school kid," Eun Sang muttered, but stuck out her pinky as well.
Eun Sang pays the taxi fare out of the grocery money her mother gives her and sprints up the hill.
She sees him before he sees her, and she nearly falls from the shock.
Young Do is barely standing straight and is holding onto the street light with his hand, which she can see is bruised and bloody.
"Young Do," she whispers and takes a step toward him. "What has he done to you?"
Young Do looks at her with his one good eye – the other one is completely swollen shut and smiles weakly.
"You're here."
He lets go of the street light and walks toward her – his steps uneven and Eun Sang rushes toward him. "Young Do you need to go to the hospital, this is really bad," and she staggers under his weight as he leans against her heavily. His hand comes up and brushes under her eye. "Eun Sang," Young Do says in distress. "Are you crying?"
"Of course I am, you idiot. You're hurt," Eun Sang says, and the wreckage of his face is worse close up. There's just so much blood everywhere.
"I'm sorry," he says. "I didn't mean to make you cry."
"It's not you," Eun Sang sobs. "It's what's been done to you." She pulls out her phone.
"I'm calling Myung Soo –"
"Don't," Young Do attempts to take her phone away, but he misses. "He can't keep a secret worth a damn."
"Good," Eun Sang says. "People should know what kind of monster your father is."
"Eun Sang, stop."
"Why?"
"Because it doesn't matter anymore."
"How can it not matter?" Eun Sang says incredulously.
Young Do rests his head against her shoulder. "Because my mother left. She left and she broke her promise and nothing matters anymore."
"Young Do—"
"Don't say you're sorry okay? It didn't work the first time and it's not going to work now. I'm not going to the hospital."
"All right," Eun Sang says quietly. "Can you walk with me down the stairs?"
"Go slowly."
Myung Soo gets the message just as he's about to take a shower.
Come to my house. Hurry. It's Young Do.
He tells his mother he's studying at the study room and that he'll be back later.
The taxi ride to Eun Sang's house is filled with furious texting – what was wrong, what was Young Do doing, how did it look. Eun Sang tells him the details and warns him to prepare for the worst.
The door is unlocked when he gets there, and he locks it after himself when he goes in.
No lights are on except for a brief line of light underneath a door. He guesses it's Eun Sang's room.
He knocks and hears her say, "Come in."
Myung Soo peers inside the room. His heart feels funny, like a hummingbird lives in it. He sees Young Do first – his feet hang off of Eun Sang's bed. Eun Sang is stretched out next to him, her cheek pressed against his forehead.
Young Do's face is a mess of purple bruises and vivid red cuts, but he looks peaceful – and Myung Soo notes the way his arm curls around Eun Sang's waist.
He swallows painfully.
Eun Sang's eyes open and she looks straight at him. Myung Soo steps back in surprise. Eun Sang smiles, and raises her hand.
She beckons.
Come here.
He shakes his head – and Eun Sang frowns. She repeats the gesture.
Come here.
His feet follow her command and then he's standing right next to them. Eun Sang pats the space next to her.
When he whispers, "There's not enough room," Eun Sang's brows meet in the middle and she reaches out for his hand.
"There's always room for you."
