Right. So, this is the last chapter. Sorry for any mistakes- I'm the worst at proofreading my own work- I always miss stuff. But I really hope you like it. The weekend is coming up, so stay tuned for new stories. I'd love to hear what you all think, and be honest. I won't mind. :) I hope you enjoy.
Chapter 3:
A week had passed since Fleur had told him that he was just a sick man. Not a monster. It baffled him. Not that he disagreed with her- well, maybe he would have, once upon a time, but he knew better than to think that.
James, Sirius, and… Peter had always insisted that he wasn't a monster. He hadn't believed them at first. But then they made him realize that he was wrong. He was just prank-loving, bookish guy who had a few wolfish tendencies.
What he really wanted to figure out was when he had begun to slip back into his old way of thinking. It must have been shortly after James died, he reckoned.
He entered the kitchen thoughtfully, and nearly ran into Kingsley. "I wouldn't go in there, Remus. A certain quarter-veela is rather upset. Understandably, of course." Kingsley murmured to him.
Remus raised both eyebrows. "Why?"
Kingsley sighed. "Her aunt was murdered. Death Eaters." he added grimly.
Remus felt his heart go out to the French woman who was, he saw now, weeping at the table. He knew how it felt to lose people close to you to Voldemort.
Remus sat across from Fleur, and, slowly, grasped her hand, squeezing it gently. "I'm sorry," he said softly. "I know, it hurts."
Fleur looked up at him tearfully.
"I- I just don't understand." She sniffed. "Why must zere be a war? What does all zis death and bloodshed solve?"
Remus looked her square in the eye. "Nothing."
Fleur threw her hands up in the air. "Zen why are we doing zis?"
"Voldemort has shown that he does not care how many die before he reaches his goal. We fight back so he can't ruin our world. We fight to build a world in which our children can grow up safely, where they can live a better life." Remus told her soothingly.
Fleur's lip trembled. "What if we don't make it out?" she whispered.
Remus gave her a sad smile. "Then the strength we leave behind we will give to the people still fighting."
Fleur looked away from him. "Did you feel stronger after your friends died?"
Remus did not flinch. "Yes. I didn't know it at the time, but the stories of their lives, the fact that they had enough courage to die for this cause, gave me the courage to do the same."
Fleur looked startled. "But- don't you believe zat you will live through zis?"
Remus shrugged. "I can't say for sure. But... out of the Marauders, I'm the only one left alive. And nothing could ever keep us apart for long. Why should death be any different? I think it's very possible I won't make it out alive. But I may. It could be another twenty years before I'm reunited with my friends. But I know this- if I die in this war, it will be fighting for a better future for all those who come after me. And who knows? Maybe if I fight hard enough, I can cancel out the bad name Greyback has given my kind. Maybe I can give future werewolves a better shot than I had."
Fleur grasped his hands. "I know you will."
Remus smiled. "Nothing would make me happier."
She sniffed again. "How do you deal with death? I didn't know my aunt vairy well, but her passing made me realize- tomorrow, it could be Gabrielle. Or Bill. Or my parents. Or- " she stopped herself.
Remus rubbed the back of her hand with his thumb. "You- you never get used to it. I still miss Lily, James, and Sirius with a fiery passion- the difference is, I've stopped expecting them to still be alive when I wake up." His eyes filled with tears. "This is a war, though. People will die. We can't stop that. But we can do our best to put an end to the bloodshed by winning the war."
Fleur hiccoughed. "When you lost zem- ze Potters- 'ow deed you react?"
"I- " Remus took a shuddering breath. "I was on an Oder mission far away. Well, it wasn't really a mission- everyone suspected me of being the spy, so Dumbledore began sending me on fake ones. I never told anyone that I knew what was going on. I didn't have much money, and had lost track of the days, so I grabbed a copy of the Daily Prophet a witch had just thrown away. I was in a small pub at the time, and I remember feeling so confused as to why everyone was celebrating. I read the headline, and it nearly gave me a heart attack. It said, Harry Potter Saves Wizarding World! The Dark Lord Defeated! I read the article, very afraid for Harry. It mostly focused on Harry, of course, and the fact that Voldemort was dead, but I managed to get the whole story by asking around: Lily, James, and Peter were dead, betrayed by Sirius. They were all I had then, you have to understand- they were all my family. I collapsed, right in the middle of that pub. Sobbing. The owner helped me to my room when I was finally able to tell him that my friends were dead- everyone understood how crushing a loss could be. I stayed in bed for days, then eventually wandered back to my apartment. I spent the next few weeks smashing everything I owned, cursing Sirius, crying, and just staring at the ceiling. I didn't eat. I didn't sleep. The only time I went outside was for Lily and James' funeral- there were Ministry officials there, and by that time I was registered as a werewolf. They didn't let me in." his voice broke. Fleur's eyes widened in anger and sympathy. Remus cleared his throat and continued. "I stayed as close to the ceremony as they let me, and when everyone had gone home, I knelt in front of their graves. I just broke down," he whispered. "I couldn't do anything more than cry and apologize. They were gone, and I couldn't bring them back. It was a long while before I was able to function again- in fact, Andromeda Tonks was the one to owl me. I had met her twice before, when I had come with James and Sirius to her house. She told me how sorry she was for my losses, but that she didn't want me to waste away. I wrote her, thanking her for her condolences, and offered my own. I also thanked her for remembering me, even though she had only met me twice. No one else had bothered contacting me. Shortly afterwards, I got a job in a muggle bookstore, and… the rest is history."
Fleur nodded slowly. "So you are saying… you deed not deal wiz it… you just kept living."
Remus shrugged. "It's not a perfect solution, but it's how I deal with my grief. I live through it."
Fleur wiped at her eyes. "I just want zis war to be over."
Remus came around the table and sat next to her, giving her a slightly-awkward, one-armed hug. "I know. And it will be. Soon. You just have to have faith."
Fleur returned the hug. "I would not 'ave ze strength to keep going wizzout you."
Remus smiled wanly. "You've become rather important to me, too. But let me give you one last piece of advice."
She looked up at him expectantly. "What?"
He hesitated. "If I die before the war is over, look in my desk drawer for an envelope- the top right. It will be addressed to you. If I do make it out alive, I'll just tell you."
On May 2, 1998, a tearful Fleur Weasley reached a shaking hand into a certain werewolf's desk drawer. She pulled out a cream-colored envelope that had Fleur Delacour Weasley sprawled across it in elegant script. With a shuddering breath, she opened it, and began to read.
My dearest Fleur-
How are you? A silly question, under the circumstances, perhaps, but I do want to know. I hope you did not suffer too greatly. If you are reading this, it means that the war is over- and that I am dead.
I am sorry I had to leave you all behind. I can only hope that you all will be happy when you are reminded of my life- and that you are not sad for too long. Take care of Dora for me. But I wrote this letter to tell you three things, and I've always found that it's better to be straightforward than to avoid something that needs to be said.
I am not afraid of death. Know that even though I am gone, I am fine. I will finally be reunited with my brothers and my sister. And my parents. Merlin, it's been so long since I've seen them. Remember that I do not fear what awaits me. I simply regret having to leave you all behind.
The advice I was going to give you all those months ago: Keep living. Love your family unconditionally. Laugh more. Smile more. Live life to the fullest, because, no matter how old you are, you still have time left. Use it well. Don't let a day go by wasted.
Finally, I'd like to let you know that you are a lovely young woman. You have a refreshing personality, and you'll make a fantastic mother one day. I feel privileged to have known you. My world was a brighter place with you in it. You're like a niece to me, and I love you like one.
All my love, your friend,
Remus John Lupin
Fleur put the letter back in the envelope. "I love you too, Remus." she whispered to the setting sun. A tear slid down her cheek as she reflected on the last words of the man she had come to regard as her uncle. "Unconditionally."
