Keith was sitting in a chair in an empty examination room, fighting through a gradually receding wave of panic.
His nerves had already been frayed after a night of restless contemplation and too-little sleep, and watching Shiro screaming in pain in response to his malfunctioning prosthetic had pushed him right up to the edge of a breaking point. Luckily, he'd been able to duck away from the group before the wave of sickening adrenaline had come crashing down on him.
He's fine. Shiro's fine. Everything's okay.
He put his elbows on his knees, held his forehead in his hands, and tried to believe it.
There was a knock at the door.
"Keith?"
He straightened up.
It was Hunk.
He stared at the door, wishing for the comfort he knew Hunk's presence could bring, rebelling against the potential for complication.
His wrist communicator buzzed.
Hunk: I know you're in there. Can I please come in?
Keith felt a pleasant flutter in his midsection. The door wasn't locked. Hunk could've barged right in if he'd wanted to.
But he hadn't. He'd asked, first.
Keith: Yeah.
The door swung open slowly, and Hunk stepped inside and shut it behind him. He carried a chair over from the corner of the room, set it down next to Keith, and settled into it.
They were silent for a moment, holding themselves still, staring at the opposite wall.
"Well," Hunk eventually said. "That was horrifying on every conceivable level."
The bluntness of his assessment caught Keith completely off guard.
He laughed, and the tension shattered.
Hunk eyed him, smiling.
"Shiro's doing just fine, man. It's all going to be okay."
Keith nodded, recovering.
"I know. It's just… he keeps trying to die on me."
"Nah. No way. Shiro's, like, unkillable. He's the second-biggest badass I know."
Keith met his eye. "Oh yeah? Who's the first?"
Hunk went slightly pink in the cheeks.
"You're really gonna make me say it?"
Keith raised his eyebrows. "Me?"
"Duh."
He shook his head.
"Pretty sure I wouldn't be hiding in this medical bay if I were really such a badass."
"Yuh huh. That's why you are. You know how to handle your shit. It's not even 10:00 AM yet and I've almost lost my mind, like, three different times today. That briefing… and then Shiro… and you've been awesome. You're holding us all together, man, and…"
Hunk stood up and faced away from him.
"I was waiting for a chance to talk to you," he went on, fidgeting with his hands in front of his stomach, "because I just wanted to tell you... I already thought you were the biggest badass I've ever met, even before I knew you had SPD, and now that I know… I kinda can't even deal with how impressive you are. So if you need to lose your shit for a minute before we go figure out how to blast Sendak out of the sky… I'll be here for you. And…" he dropped his hands to his sides, turning his head just enough that Keith could see his profile. "You should've come back to my room, last night."
Keith looked down at the floor, feeling light and lightheaded, like a balloon had inflated inside his chest.
"I know. I wanted to."
Hunk turned to face him.
"So why didn't you?"
"Because I don't know how to do…" He gestured vaguely between them. "…this."
"Okay, me neither, but… so what? I mean, we're staring down almost certain death, like, every day. What do we have to lose?"
Keith shook his head. "I don't even know what you're getting at. We were just-"
"Snuggling? In bed together?"
Keith's mouth fell open.
"We… we were?"
A crease appeared between Hunk's eyebrows. Keith wanted to smooth it away.
"You were there, weren't you?"
"Well, yeah, but I meant… you were just doing me a favor, right? Trying to make me feel better?"
"Uh, yeah, but I was also…" Hunk hesitated, then said, "I told you, man. I really wanted to do that stuff, too."
The balloon in Keith's chest was uncomfortable, now. He was having trouble getting enough air into his lungs. His chest was tight with anticipation, his mind reeling at the notion that Hunk might be about to hand him something he desperately wanted, something he'd barely begun to name, yet.
"Why?" he asked. "Why would you want to do that kind of thing with me?"
"Because it felt good. Because I trust you, and… I think you're awesome."
Keith stood up, emboldened. Hunk had said what he'd needed to hear.
"I think you're awesome, too."
Hunk's eyes lit up. "Really?"
"Duh," Keith quoted, earning himself a smile. "You're so smart, and you make everyone laugh all the time, and you get what's going on with me…"
He ran out of words. He didn't know where this was going, but he knew he was glad Hunk had come to find him, and he knew that even the small distance between them felt like too much, right now.
"Keith? Can I…"
Hunk paused, then crossed his arms over his own chest, bringing his hands up toward his shoulders.
Yes, Keith thought. You can. I want you to.
He nodded.
Hunk moved behind him, slid his arms around his chest, and held on tight.
"Too much or not enough?" His voice was low, his chin resting on Keith's shoulder.
"Not enough."
He tightened his hold, and Keith let go of his breath, along with almost all the tension he'd been holding in his neck and shoulders. He closed his eyes.
"Just right."
Hunk nodded against his shoulder, and his hair moved against Keith's neck and ear, a light, feathery sensation that pulled him out of the greater bliss he'd been sinking into.
"Hunk… your hair…"
Hunk lifted his head, pulling away from him a bit.
"Sorry. Better?"
Keith frowned. It wasn't.
"No. I just meant… it was too light. It wasn't… enough."
"Oh."
A couple of seconds ticked by before Keith felt Hunk's cheek press against his neck – soothing heat and perfect pressure against sensitive skin…
"Mh," Keith let slip.
"Too much?"
"No," he murmured, caught halfway between just right and not enough. He was having trouble finding his breath again, for an entirely new reason. He tilted his head in Hunk's direction and let his cheek rest against his hair, breathing in the smell. It was fresh and clean, and so wonderfully familiar: soap and shampoo like he'd used all his life, before he learned what it was like to feel the weight of the world on his shoulders. Soap and shampoo from this planet. Their planet.
Hunk smelled like home.
"Keith…"
Keith barely heard him, even though Hunk's mouth was right next to his ear. He felt one of Hunk's hands slide down from his chest to his stomach.
He stopped breathing altogether. He put his hand on top of Hunk's and pressed, and then he felt Hunk's lower half go flush against him from behind, felt the pressure against his neck shifting until he was sure that it was Hunk's half-open mouth pressed against his skin instead of his cheek.
The pressure increased, just for a moment: a not-quite, almost-kiss.
"Oh," Keith breathed. He'd never been kissed, before.
"Too much?"
"Nh… Not enough."
Hunk did it again, and Keith felt the slow drag of his lips, this time, just barely, just enough to be sure-
Hunk was kissing him.
He squeezed Hunk's hand and leaned into him, letting his body relax, letting Hunk hold him up.
"Keith."
He frowned at the loss of pressure. He didn't want to talk. He wanted to feel.
"Mm?"
"We need to go in a minute, okay? But I just need to tell you…"
He felt the pressure against his neck again: warm, firm, fleeting.
Perfect.
"I didn't get into this with you to give you one more thing to worry about," Hunk murmured. "You can count on me. You're my friend, and I love you. No matter what."
Oh.
Sometimes talking and feeling happened at the same time, Keith realized, as a soothing warmth spread from his belly, to his chest, to the tips of his fingers.
"You can count on me, too."
"I know, I…" He felt Hunk's thumb move in a slow circle over his stomach. "That's why I want to do this."
Keith loosened his grip on Hunk's hand and took hold of his wrist, instead, and Hunk took the hint. He went on exploring with his thumb for a moment, then moved the rest of his fingertips, too, massaging Keith's stomach with a firm touch.
Keith wanted to know what it would feel like without two layers of fabric getting in the way. He wanted to know what Hunk's hand would feel like against his bare skin. He wanted-
"Do you feel okay?" Hunk asked.
Keith almost laughed at the colossal understatement.
"Yeah. I feel okay."
Hunk's fingertips stopped their slow exploration. He moved his hands to Keith's hips, applied brief, firm pressure, and then stepped away from him.
"Me, too," he said, at a normal speaking volume.
Keith bowed his head for a moment, scanning his body. As much as he regretted the loss of pressure – of heat, of closeness – his skin felt calm, and his breath was slow and even.
He was regulated.
He turned around, slid his arms around Hunk's shoulders, and pulled him close, because he wanted to, and because Hunk deserved to be hugged. And since he'd never kissed anyone before, and he wasn't exactly sure how it was done, he pressed his whole face against Hunk's cheek before he stepped away.
He knew he was blushing.
He didn't care.
You can count on me.
You're my friend, and I love you.
"Ready to get back?" Hunk asked. He was blushing, too.
"Yeah." Keith met his eye, held his gaze with calm confidence. "I'm ready."
They didn't touch each other again until after they'd fallen out of the sky.
Keith opened his eyes to find Krolia and Kolivan by his bedside, and he wondered, vaguely, if he'd died after all, because how could they have gotten here?
"Mom?"
The notion promptly squashed itself as soon as he tried to sit up; he doubted anyone felt this kind of pain in the afterlife. He winced and brought a shaky hand toward the back of his head, thinking it must be split wide open. His fingers brushed against the bandage that was woven through his hair.
"Don't get up, Keith." Krolia was sitting next to him on the bed, now. "Your skull was fractured, but the break has already closed. You're healing well."
Fractured skull. That explains it.
"Everyone else?"
She smiled. "Banged up, but safe. The other paladins are all here on this hallway. Lance and Pidge have been here every hour to check on you. Allura has stopped by more than once, and Shiro calls every chance he gets."
He frowned. "Hunk?"
"He's next door. He's supposed to be on bed rest, but he snuck in here a while ago, too. Lance made sure he got back to bed safely."
"So he's all right?"
"Yes. He had a concussion, but the doctors say he's recovering well. He's under observation until tonight."
Keith breathed a sigh of relief, pointedly ignoring the throb of pain that came with it.
"How did you get here?"
"Allura used the Atlas to open a gateway. We came as soon as we heard about what happened."
Keith took this in. His memories of the battle were coming back in jumbled flashes.
"Sendak…"
"He's dead."
Keith swallowed.
"I killed him."
"You saved Shiro's life. You saved your entire planet, and everyone on it."
He was spared the task of processing the notion, since a Garrison medical officer arrived to examine him, just then. Krolia and Kolivan tried to insist on staying, but Keith could hear the exhaustion in their voices, the result of a full day-and-a-half of waiting for the doctors to lift his sedation, and he managed to convince them to take a break and get some sleep. Kosmo stayed where he was, curled up on the floor by the window, fast asleep.
The medical officer helped Keith sit up so she could examine the incision at the back of his head, lingering evidence that a surgeon had repaired his damaged skull; it was already sealed and healing perfectly. She used a portable imaging device to check for internal swelling, too, and found none.
She gave him some pills for the pain and cleared him for limited movement around his room, though she explained that he was technically on bed rest, and would have to call for an escort if he wanted to go anywhere else. He didn't love the idea, but he could see the sense in it. Just sitting up made him feel nauseous and unsteady, and he had no desire to risk further injury.
The medical officer took her leave just as Shiro appeared in the doorway, wearing his new uniform and looking exhausted. They smiled at each other, and Keith nodded, inviting him in.
"It's so good to see you with your eyes open," Shiro said, sitting down on the edge of the bed.
"Ditto."
"Mm. I guess so, huh? I'm sorry I scared you, like that."
"It's okay. I'm just glad you found your way back."
"Thanks to you." Shiro shook his head. "And you saved my life again, Keith."
Keith shrugged a little. "Force of habit."
Shiro smiled, though there was no real humor in his expression.
"I've really put you through it, huh?"
Keith didn't answer. He was starting to feel sleepy and light, a side-effect of the medication kicking in.
"I'm sorry," Shiro said, scrutinizing his face. "I know you need to rest. You're on shore leave until further notice, okay? Your orders are to sleep and recover, and to call me for whatever you need. I'd like to take some of the weight off your shoulders for a while, if I can."
Keith tried to scowl, though he wasn't sure if he hit the mark.
"Shiro-"
"Please," Shiro said, softly. "After everything you've done for me… I'll never be able to make it up to you, but it'll do me some good to try."
Keith blinked through the medication haze and eventually gave him a small nod.
"Can I hug you?" Shiro asked.
"Yeah."
It was practiced and familiar: the firm pressure of Shiro's arms around his back, the careful weight of Shiro's chin on his shoulder.
"I'm so glad you're okay, Keith, and… I…"
He hesitated. He let Keith go, his gaze drifting away from his face as the space between them grew.
Keith let out a small sigh.
He was used to Shiro's hesitation. He knew Shiro cared deeply for him, but he always kept him at arm's length, always stopped just short of any real admission of the feelings he kept so closely guarded.
It had been a long time since Keith had bothered trying to guess at what those feelings might be.
"I'll come right back if you need anything, okay?" Shiro finished, clumsily.
He was always telling Keith how much he wanted to stay, right before he left.
"Thanks, Shiro. I'm glad you're okay, too."
Keith stared after him for a moment after he'd gone, resisting the urge to collapse back onto his pillow, trying to summon the energy to lay down carefully, like he knew he should. He was still gazing absently into the hallway when Hunk stepped into view, wearing Garrison-issue orange loungewear and sporting a bandage like his own, the white fabric a stark contrast against the glossy brown-black of his hair. His smile forced Keith's lingering pain so far from his mind, he forgot about it entirely.
"You're awake!" Hunk said, pausing at the doorframe. "I thought I heard your voice."
Keith nodded sluggishly, felt his features rearranging into a slow-motion smile. "Come in."
Hunk closed the door behind him, and even in his foggy state, Keith felt butterflies starting to flutter in his midsection.
"You scared the shit out of me, man," Hunk told him, dragging a chair close to the bed and settling into it. "You make that bandage look good, though. Any tips?"
Keith felt a legitimate giggle bubble up from somewhere deep inside himself, the sound of it light and unfamiliar to his own ears. Hunk looked delighted.
"Painkillers, huh?"
"Uh huh."
"You should probably lay down before you topple over."
"Nooo. No. Not yet." Keith frowned, feeling like the connection between his brain and his mouth was shorting out. "I had a thing. Something to tell you."
Hunk giggled. "It's okay, man, you can tell me after hrmph-"
He had to pause, because Keith had nudged at his face with the heel of his hand.
"No. Shh. Let me think."
Hunk went on giggling while Keith sifted through the foggy wasteland of his brain, trying to remember what he'd been dying to tell Hunk since the moment he'd woken up. He held out his hand absently, and Hunk picked it up and applied firm pressure to his fingers.
"Just right… OH!" He fixed his gaze on Hunk's face, totally unaware of the dopey grin on his face. "You saved all our lives!"
Hunk's eyebrows went up.
"Huh?"
"You did! You knew we could call our lions when we were on Sendak's ship, and… we saved the Atlas, and… it was all your fault!" He frowned. That wasn't what he'd meant to say. "I mean… you were… awesome."
Keith swayed a bit. Hunk caught him with a firm hand on his shoulder.
"Okay, buddy. Time to lay down."
Keith didn't – couldn't – argue. He let Hunk steer him onto his back, and he settled onto his pillow with his head tilted in Hunk's direction.
"Awesome," he repeated. His eyelids felt impossibly heavy; they fell closed of their own accord. "Thank you."
Hunk didn't answer; he was busy wiping at his cheeks.
"Hunk."
"Yeah?"
"Do you want to lay down?"
"Um. Yeah, but… I don't think there's enough room."
"No. I meant…" Keith slid his hand up to his chest, pulling Hunk's with it. "Here."
He was already slipping out of wakefulness when he felt the weight of Hunk's head settle over his heart.
"Too much?" Hunk murmured.
"Just right."
His fingers found their way into Hunk's hair.
"Keith?"
He was already asleep.
The sun was hanging low in the sky when Keith opened his eyes again. He blinked at the door to his room, trying to figure out why it was open. Hunk had closed it when…
Hunk.
He sat up.
"Hey, man."
There was someone sitting next to his bed, but it wasn't Hunk.
It was Lance.
