A/N: Special shout out to Monica acaptainswaneternity - the artist with this story. I have loved everything she has done for me - so make sure to check her out! She made an amazing cover and the best image sets for each chapter.
Another huge shout out to Nicola alocin209 who beta read everything and tried to keep me on target!
Sorry for the delay each Friday, but this baby has me forgetting what day it is every day. FYI - she has been moving a lot more and i've dropped, which means the babe may be coming a bit earlier. If nothing is posted next week, you'll know why. I will try to keep everyone updated as things happen.
Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck she thought. Why did it have to be Killian Jones on this plane and why did he have to recognize her? Why, after everything that had happened in the past twenty-four hours, did he have to show up and throw her for another spin? The second her name left his lips, she knew everything was going to change. She didn't know how things would change, but she knew it would.
Maybe she could just ignore him. It wasn't that she didn't want to get to know him again - she actually did want that. She was just still angry over everything that had happened. The last time she talked to him, things were so different. She didn't quite know how it would play out now. Her thoughts were random and contradictory. On one hand, she wanted to talk to him, to see how he was doing because she still had that pull towards him. On the other hand, she was pissed that he left her all those years ago, that he just dropped what they had.
"Emma Nolan?" she heard again from the seats across from her, and she knew she could no longer ignore him.
Turning slowly, or at least it seemed like everything was in slow motion, she took him in again. He had a light scruff on his jaw, which accented every chiseled feature on his face. He looked like he did back in the day, but at the same time, he looked different. It was something in his eyes, the once bright irises were darker somehow, worn by the years. They still held that brilliant blue though. His arms, she noticed when he took of his jacket, were still pronounced and she stared at them a bit longer than she should have.
"Killian Jones," she breathed out, a small smile crossing her face. She didn't mean for it to appear, but she couldn't help it. Now that she was looking at him, some of that anger from years ago slipped away.
"I thought that was you love," he replied, with a bit of a laugh in his voice. His smile was wide and it was contagious. Emma didn't reply to his response, instead her smile just grew to match his as her eyes cast down onto the empty seat next to her. She wasn't really inviting him to join her, but at the same time she wished he would move over. The sight of his smile had more of her anger towards him vanishing.
He must have gotten her hidden message as he asked her almost immediately if he could move to sit next to her. She nodded her head at him, gesturing for him to take the empty seat.
"Excuse me, would you mind getting us a few more drinks? Mimosas for both of us please," he said as he moved to the seat next to her. The attendant nodded as she moved back to the galley.
"So, Emma Nolan, I never thought I would see you again, let alone on a plane home. How have you been?" he asked as he sat down. She could smell him as he took his seat. It was the biggest change in him since their departure. She never noticed his scent before now, but for some reason she knew high school Killian didn't smell like rum and wood. It was intoxicating.
"I can't lie, I hoped I wouldn't see you again," she said, "but I've been OK. And technically speaking, it's Emma Swan now."
It was like he could tell something was wrong with her. She hoped to play off her emotions of the past day, but she couldn't hide them from him.
"I don't think you've been OK love, but I'll let that slide. How about you explain the name change," he winked, as he took the drinks back from the attendant who had suddenly reappeared.
"Thank you," she responded, to both of them. She didn't want to talk about what happened with Neal to him, especially since she wouldn't consider him her friend anymore and it had been over six years since they last spoke. Yet, something told her that she could have talked to him anyway. Some people have that type of friendship that you could pick up after years of being apart and the friendship they had once shared was one of those. However, Emma's anger at how their friendship fell apart, while disappearing, was still present.
"You have got to have mimosas on a late morning flight," he smiled as he handed her the drink. She fought back every thought that told her to down the drink and demand another one.
They sat in silence for a few minutes, each of them sipping their drinks, letting the champange do its job.
Emma got lost in her thoughts again. Yes, there was still a part of her that was pissed at how everything went down and would probably always be there; but there was another part of her that knew there was still a pull towards him. A spark still shone between them. She could feel the electricity coming off his forearm that sat close to hers. She was still attracted to him, and she was sure that he was attracted to her. She wasn't cocky, but being a model, you knew most people found you attractive.
"Love?" he questioned, using the term of endearment that he used for most women he came in contact with. She remembered when he first used it when talking to her, when she was eight. She was smitten right away, the pre-teen hormones making her swoon at his words. Too soon, she learned that he used it for everyone, but it still made her swoon when he said it to her.
"I'm sorry, what?" she apologized.
"I was asking what you were doing on the plane. If you lived in LA or were just visiting?" he asked again. A smile crossing his face again and she couldn't help but smile back.
"I live in LA actually," she answered.
"So you actually did it then?" he smiled as he asked his question. He must have remembered that he helped her make it here.
"I guess you could say that. I can't believe you remember," she answered.
"Of course I remember. We spent so many nights working on applications so you could get to LA and live your dream!" he responded. "So tell me all about it."
Emma relaxed a bit, thankful that they weren't going to bring up what happened in the past too quickly. Hopefully, this would just be a quick exchange of pleasantries and then they would go their separate ways again. She really didn't want to relive the past.
"Well, I went to UCLA and then started modeling two months after I got here. I graduated and started to focus solely on modeling. I changed my working name to Emma Swan, as there was already an Emily Nolan around when I was starting out and I didn't want any confusion," she explained.
"That's amazing Emma! You actually did it! And Swan fits you really well actually." She could hear the excitement in his voice. He was actually proud of her.
"Yeah, I guess I did. What about you?" she questioned.
It was in that moment that she saw his demeanor change. He looked broken for a moment, but then regained his composure and turned to face her.
"I was drafted right out of college. I headed out west and played in the minors for a while. Last year was my first year with the majors," he said, with a timid smile. She could tell he was happy doing what he did, but he wasn't fully proud of himself.
"You did it too!" she exclaimed.
She pointed to his hat as she said the words. He must play for the Dodgers, which meant he lives in LA. For at least a year, they've lived in the same city, within 30 miles of each other, and never ran into each other. It made Emma laugh actually. To spend six years apart, not talking to each other after falling hard for the man, to end up in the same city and never seeing each other, was just crazy. To many, LA wasn't a large city, it was actually quite small. You ran into people you knew all the time. Hell, Emma had met so many celebrities just from walking into a grocery store, but not once did she run into Killian Jones.
"I guess," he replied, pain lacing his voice. She didn't quite understand it. She didn't particularly keep up with baseball - why should she? It was just one more thing that reminded her of him. However, she did know they won the World Series the year before. Everyone in the area knew it, there were giant parades when the team came back, parties for weeks over the win.
"Killian, you won the World Series last year, clearly you are living your dream!" she exclaimed, hoping to make him feel a bit better.
He just smiled at her response. In that moment, something inside of her told her she needed to fix his lousy attitude, which also meant changing the subject. She knew there wasn't much they would be able to talk about, it had been years. So she did the only thing she could think of.
"Let's play a game!" she proposed.
"A game Swan?" he questioned, with a bit of apprehension on his face. He used her new name. It bothered her at times when she couldn't use her actual last name, but hearing the name from him seemed right. Sure, she originally just changed the name to distance herself from the other model, and Swan was something Ruby called her at times when she was drunk because she was anything but graceful. However, now hearing it in an accent and with his voice, it made the name change feel right.
"Yes, a game. Let's play Truth or Dare," she suggested.
"And why should we play that childish game?" he responded with a sip of his drink, calling the attendant over to refill it.
"It may sound stupid, but I met my best friends through this game, and I think it will help take our minds off of the things we really don't want to talk about," she explained.
It was true, Ruby and Lacey had become her best friends over a game of truth or dare soon after she arrived. Ruby, of course lived for the dares, but Lacey and Emma loved the truth part. Whenever someone new came into the group, the girls had their mandatory Truth or Dare night. You couldn't be part of the squad if you didn't participate and, according to Ruby, complete one of her racy dares.
She could remember Elsa having to streak down Sunset naked at two in the morning because Ruby dared her too. Elsa wasn't too embarrassed by that, and seemed to enjoy the freedom it provided. However, when Ruby dared her to make out with a random stranger at Mixology one night, Elsa drew the line.
They had a refill of their drinks, and Emma hoped that Killian would be willing to play.
"Alright love, let's play."
Emma was the master at Truth or Dare. OK, maybe that was Ruby, but Emma was pretty good at asking questions that were embarrassing, but funny at the same time.
Emma started it off by asking what was one thing Killian regretted most about living in LA. To her surprise, he said it was having someone drive him around. She laughed loudly when she found out he had a driver. Emma had only ever used one once, when she was doing a shoot for a wedding gown and they needed to have her shoot in four locations. She didn't mind the driver, but would always prefer to drive herself around, blasting music and singing along in her off key voice.
Killian went with a dare first, which didn't surprise her at all. He dared her to send the last picture she took on her phone to him, no matter what it was. The joke was on him though, as the photo wasn't racy or scandalous, but just an amusing photo of an avocado wearing sunglasses. She had found it on a website and thought it was funny. He got a chuckle out of it though and he was amused by why Emma thought to save it.
Things progressed from there. The truth questions they asked each other were pretty tame, and if they did dare each other, they were pretty lame. She learned that he was going home for three weeks but not really sure why as he skirted around the reasoning. She had told him that she was going home for Henry's party and she was excited to see her brother but she kept Neal and her past hidden. It seemed both of them had secrets they wanted to keep.
She was sure Ruby would have quit the game a while ago if she had joined in. Emma could picture it: Ruby standing up, her hands on her hips, all pissed off calling them pussies, before walking out complaining that no one really understood how to play Truth or Dare.
Something that was different though was the flirtation that was now happening between the two. Emma wasn't too sure at first what was happening, it had been a while since anyone really flirted with her to just flirt. Neal would flirt when he felt jealous, other men would flirt on set when they wanted something, but no one ever flirted with her just because they wanted her. It started off innocent enough, slight glances that were held a bit longer than normal, the brush of his fingers on her hand as she took her replenishments from him. They were well into their fifth round of drinks when their questions became less lighthearted and more brazen.
He had moved closer to her as their conversation moved more personal. Her truths had begun to dig into the man he was today. She had asked him about his most recent sexual escapade, to which he just blushed and said he would take a dare instead. Emma chose some stupid random dare to bypass the embarrassment, hoping that she didn't ruin their fun. She really was having fun; the guy she once knew was still there, but there was more to him that intrigued her.
When he came back from the dare, he didn't create any distance between them, he moved closer. He rarely took his eyes off of her. He was constantly scratching behind his ear and when his eyes did move from hers, they only left to look at what she was wearing. She knew he lingered a bit at her chest. She would be lying if she said she hadn't done the same thing to him a few times.
"Alright Swan, my turn. Truth - why haven't you been back to Virginia since moving?" he asked, a question she was hoping he wouldn't.
"I couldn't be there anymore. There was nothing left for me. My future was here," she explained, keeping it simple. She really didn't want to tell him that he was part of that reason. She didn't want him to know that she couldn't be around her house when everything reminded her of him, of what he did to her. LA provided her with a fresh start. Sure, Killian had helped her get there, but once she landed in LA, everything that happened was because of her hard work.
"There is more to it, I know there is," he tested her, leaning in a bit more.
"How do you know?" she wondered.
"You are something of an open book to me love, always have been. You can't hide that there is another reason you don't go home," he said with a twinkle in his eyes. He was right though. He always knew when something was going on with her, even from a young age.
"It's a bit embarrassing," she whispered.
"Tell me anyway. Isn't that the point of Truth or Dare?" he countered, nodding his head to keep her going. His hand had moved closer to hers and the hairs on the back of her arm were standing at attention. Goosebumps were peppering her skin.
"Alright," she began, "I never went back home because the last memory I have of the place was my graduation party. You know, the one you didn't show up at, even though you had promised me you would."
She hadn't meant for the confession to come out harshly but she sounded like a bitch and she knew she came off that way. She could see his mood deflate. He was still close to her, but the sparkle had left his eyes and he had sagged a bit in his seat.
"Truth - why didn't you show up? Why did you hurt me like that? Why did you just leave? What you did really hurt Killian, I was in…" she started, but quickly changed her direction, unwilling to say she used to love him. "I needed you, and you just threw me to the side. Why?"
He looked up and his blue eyes tore into her. She could see the pain in his eyes and it was worse than she had seen it all day. Yes, there was pain when she discussed baseball, and there was some pain when discussing past experiences, but there was more now in those eyes.
"I'm sorry for how it happened Emma, I didn't want to let you down, but I had to. The shit that happened is in the past. I don't really want to relive it and I don't think you want to either. Can't we just leave it there? Can't I just say that I'm sorry, what I did to you was shitty, and start over again?" he pleaded, looking into her eyes.
She wasn't quite sure what to say at first, but he was right. It was in the past. Six years had passed and something bad had happened in those times, something he wasn't quite ready to discuss with her. In the back of her mind, she did think she could move on. He did apologize; sure it wasn't the best apology or anything but he had sounded sincere.
"Alright, I'll let it go, for now," she warned him. They were going to be around each other for a while and maybe she would get something out of him later.
They sat in silence a few more minutes, Emma drinking her next mimosa. Killian had switched to rum about an hour ago, but Emma couldn't stop drinking the sweet drink in front of her.
"My turn, I think Swan," he started, making her stop looking out of the window at the fields passing below. "Who was your highschool crush? You never really talked about anyone special, but there had to have been someone."
Shit she swore to herself. She knew she wouldn't be able to lie to him. Her palms began to sweat a bit; she was nervous about finally spilling her guts to him. She wasn't this nervous when she thought he liked her back her senior year. Yet here she was, nervous about telling the man she hadn't seen in years that she used to like him, so much in fact, that she was in love with him before he shattered her heart.
"Ummm…." she tried to start, even though the words were getting caught in her throat. She reached for her drink and downed it in one straight gulp.
"Spill it love," he prompted her, his past sadness wiped away.
"You," was all she said, her voice barely audible. She was worried about his reaction but she still looked up and met his eyes. To her surprise, he wore a smile on his face and his eyes were shining again.
"Are you serious?" he finally said, after what seemed like hours later but was really only seconds.
"Well yeah. I mean, we talked so much the last few months of school, I couldn't help but fall for you a bit," she confessed.
He chuckled at her confession. It wasn't a laugh that was making fun of her, it was more a laugh of disbelief. Like he couldn't believe that she would actually like him.
"Don't worry though Jones, that crush ended pretty quickly," she jested, hoping to move on. She was embarrassed and his reaction to her confession was worrying her a bit. He was looking at her differently now.
"Oh really?" he questioned, moving a bit closer to her. They were inches apart now. She could smell the rum on his lips, could feel his breath hitch when she looked at his lips.
"Yeah, it's old news. It's in the past," she said, trying to make sure she believed it as well as him.
"If you say so," he winked and Emma knew he had something up his sleeve.
"I do," she replied, a bit more forcefully this time.
"Alright, my turn," he started, "I'm choosing dare this time. I dare you to kiss me. Prove to me you no longer have any feelings for me."
She couldn't tell what he was thinking, he wasn't giving anything away. Why would he dare her to kiss him?
