"Sam… wakey, wakey…" Carly's voice drifted into her ears.
Sam blinked, half asleep. "Huhh…" Sam's eyes widened at what had happened. "Guh-ross! Second syllable necessary!" Sam jumped up and rubbed her head. "I got Freddork germs on me!"
Freddie blinked awake. He didn't know his head had rested on hers. "What the…" He mumbled.
"Carls!" Sam turned to her best friend. "I can't believe you let me sleep with Fredward!" She stuck her tongue out in mere disgust.
"But you guys were so outta it, I didn't want to wake you." Carly smiled in that I-know-everything way.
"Whatever, you're dead Freddork." Sam glared.
"Don't you mean D2M?" Freddie laughed, imitating Massie yet again. Suddenly everything was better. "I gotta go. My mom's probably called the FBI." Freddie stood up and waltzed out the door.
Sam groaned. Carly smiled and said, "What's wrong?"
"Nuthin'… you got any meat?"
Massie woke with great excitement. Today she would meet her SHIRTLESSWONDER! And boy was she happy to finally be able to meet him! She applied some Cherry Coke Glossip Girl (that's his favorite soft drink!) and wiped her bangs to the right with a careful finger stroke. She grabbed a chubby boy. "Hey, what's your name?"
"Gibby." The boy said with pride.
"Do you know anyone with an AIM of Shirtless Wonder?" She looked him in the eye so he would be traumatized and give her an answer.
"No way; that was me! You're May-cey-kur?" Gibby smiled. "Dude, you're hot."
"Massie." She corrected. "And you are pretty cute…" She giggled. For once in her life, Massie was blinded from what the boy looked like.
"So you want me to show you the grounds?" Gibby asked. The bell rang. "Oh, well I guess we can wait."
"NO!" Massie screamed. Gibby looked at her weird. "I mean… Why don't we skip first period?" She smiled a bit.
"Well, if they call my mom, I'll get in trouble." He reasoned.
"Don't worry about that, I'll take care of it." Massie batted her eyelashes.
Gibby shrugged. "Okay," he took off his shirt, "let's do this!" Massie giggled.
Sam yawned and set her head on her desk. It's not her fault she didn't want to learn about the history of the peaceful Indians. It would be so much cooler if they reenacted a huge war. That would get her attention. "Did I miss the test?" Gibby ran in, shirtless of course. But something was different. Was that lipstick all over his face?
"Gibby, where have you been?" Ms. Ackerman scolded.
"Sorry, I was just makin' out with my girlfriend!" Gibby said in a what-did-I-do way.
"Gibby has a girlfriend?" Carly asked.
"Liar!" Sam chanted, soon others were chanting with her.
"Dudes, it's true! And she's hot!"
"Oh yeah? Then what's her name?" Freddie called, before Sam could.
"Massie!" He crinkled his eyebrows.
Freddie and Carly turned to Sam. "Carls, I thought she was dating that Derrington guy." She hissed.
"She is." Carly whispered back.
"Hey, Gibbo, your girlfriend's two-timing you! She has a boyfriend back in Westchester!" Sam snapped.
"She does?" Gibby asked curiously.
"Some guy named Derrington." Freddie informed him. Gibby looked a bit confused.
"Gibby! Sit down." Ms. Ackerman demanded. "And put your shirt on."
Massie sat in her desk antsy. Would her plan really work? Would she really be smart enough to befriend Sam? "Mr. Damien?" The speaker asked. "Could you send Massie Block to the office?" Mr. Damien nodded toward Massie, which she considered was her cue.
Massie walked to the office and sat. A few moments later Sam walked in. "What'd I do this time?" She asked the secretary, who shrugged. Sam sighed and sat in the chair beside Massie. "What'd you do? They mistake your perfume for toxin?"
Massie laughed. "No, I wanna talk to you."
"About what? What do we possibly have to talk about?" Sam raised an eyebrow.
"Just… stuff. What's your favorite song?"
"Rain on my Parade by Cuttlefish."
"Ooh! I love that song! I went to their concert with my friends!" Massie beamed.
"No way! I went to the concert, too with… someone… Tareen I think…" Sam looked up, deep in thought. "Didn't you love it when Yellowday played the encore? Rock the Surf is awesome!"
"Totally! And that bassist… pretty hawt right?" Massie smirked.
"He had me the moment he took his shirt off… man he had some abs…"
"Yeah, speaking of guys who take their shirts off, have you heard from Gibby? He hasn't text me all day." Massie frowned.
"You're the reason Gibby was late for class?" Sam raised an eyebrow.
"Yeah, he's just so sweet and I can actually be me with him." Massie smiled dreamily.
"But look at him… No offense, but he ain't the hottest spice in the meatball."
"You don't understand, Sam. I know you and Freddie have it made because he's hawt, but... real love is beneath that…" Massie couldn't believe she was actually saying this about a total LBR and to a LLBR.
"Whoa, what's all this about me and Freddie?" Sam asked.
"Carly said you guys were dating." Massie replied with a twisted look on her face.
"What? Oh, right!" Sam smacked her head. "Sometimes my memory's bad and… yeah…" Sam wished she could leave, but she had to face the doom of Principal Franklin's wrath.
"I got out of pre-algebra for this." Massie sighed contently.
"I got outta that class… with the teacher… who… something Indians…" Sam mumbled as her voice trailed off.
"Social Studies?"
"It's like you read my mind!" Sam exclaimed.
"You know, if we keep acting like this, you could be invited to one of my ah-mazing slumber parties." Massie got out some purple nail polish.
"Ehmagawd! Really?" Sam dramatized.
"Yes!" Massie beamed.
"No!" Sam smiled sarcastically. "Listen, just because we like the same kind of music, doesn't mean we are suddenly soul sisters that do all this girly stuff. In fact, if you haven't heard already, I hate little preppy girls like you." She glared.
Massie just shrugged. "Do whatcha want; I'll just… hang out with Gibby." She plastered a fake smile on her caked-up face.
"Impressive." Sam smirked. "Don't let rejection get to you, while at the same time you're dying for the funniest girl on iCarly to accept your invite." Massie messed up her nail polish. Massie never messed up on her nails.
Sam walked out. "Where are you going?" Massie called.
"Home. Waiting is boring." Sam threw her bag over her shoulder.
Massie stepped out of the office and stormed off to her last period, P.E. This class she had with the ah-dorable Gibby, who was already in his uniform, minus the shirt of course! "Gibby!" She smiled. Gibby gave her a look then walked in the other direction. "What's wrong?" She asked, then clapped her hand over her mouth. Had ESP taught her nothing?
"What's wrong?" He repeated. "Did you actually plan on telling me you were dating someone in New York? Or did you think I already knew because clearly everyone else does!" He snapped and stormed away. His cute little stomach fat bouncing with him.
Massie's mouth gaped open. How did anybody know about Derrington?
"Check mate." Sam smirked. "See Fredward, I can beat you at your own game."
"But how did you… what the… you cheated; didn't you?" Freddie pointed at her accusingly.
"No!" Sam frowned. "I won fair and square! Cough it up! Five bucks." Sam held out her hand.
"Fine…" Freddie was impressed. Did Sam really just beat him at chess? He was president of the chess club; he knew every move known to man! And Sam isn't the smartest of people. "How'd you win?"
Sam shrugged. "My dad… played… and he taught me." She was obviously a bit awkward around the idea of talking about her dad.
"Do you miss him?" Freddie asked.
"No!" Sam snapped, never wanting to talk about her feelings.
"I miss my dad, and I only knew him for a few years. It's painful, but I'm sure it's much harder for you." Freddie's hand brushed against hers.
"Well… it's not that complicated really. He took care of me. I loved him more than anything, and… then he died…" Sam shrugged and looked at the chess board. "His favorite game was chess."
Freddie gave her a small smile. "He'd be really proud of you."
"Please, what have I ever done that made anyone proud?"
"You read an entire book; Carly and I were really proud. You posed for Spencer's sculpture; that's an accomplishment. You can make people laugh. You stood up for me when I was being teased. You told my mom she had ugly pants, and she bought an entirely new less embarrassing wardrobe. And… you just beat me at chess." Freddie smiled and shrugged.
Sam smiled. "Okay... those are really good reasons…" There was an awkward silence that followed.
"Well… I better go do my homework." Freddie ran his hand through his hair.
"Yes… you should… go do that." She nodded. Once she was alone she sighed.
"You like him." Carly came in and handed her a Peppy Cola.
"What? No." Sam laughed. That's a good one.
"Sam, I know when you're crushing."
"I'd just as soon date Gibby." Sam shook her head. "Speakin of which, my sister apparently loves him."
"Gross!" Carly shuttered at the thought. "Come on, let's work on that new bit for iCarly."
Massie sat at the desk on her iMac, waiting impatiently for her friends to reply. It was six o' clock there! Come awn!
FUDGEGIRL: Whats sooooo urgent????
CLAIREBEAR: Yeah is there something wrong?
MASSIEKUR: Where is Leesh and Kristen???
ALICIAISBETA: Kris has soccer game. What's wrong?
MASSIEKUR: Kuh-laire, U know that guy I told U about?
CLAIREBEAR: The one U luuuuuuuv? :)
MASSIEKUR: YES! But he hates me now :(
FUDGEGIRL: What happened?
MASSIEKUR: He found out about Derrington...
CLAIREBEAR: Well, U still are technically an item cuz U haven't dumped him...
ALICIAISBETA: Point.
MASSIEKUR: How do I get him back!! :(
Massie's computer screen shut off. "Ehmagawd!" She screamed as the old electrical outlet began smoking. She quicky pulled out her iMac, grabbed Bean and her Glossip Girl collection, and ran out of the room. Right as the sprinklers went off. Her hair! She would have to wash and condition and dry and brush it a buh-zillion times to get it back to normal. She sobbed as she alone exited the apartment. She took out her Razr and dialed Sam's number. "Sam… Where does Carly live… The apartment is on fire… Seriously… I was just on my iMac… No, I will not hold… Okay… Thank you… Bye." She smiled. Sam had helped her in a life-or-death situation.
Sam groaned. "What is it?" Carly asked.
"Sissy, burned the place down." Sam mumbled
"Oh my god! Do you need a place to stay?" Carly's eyes widened.
"Nah, I'll just stay with you." Sam bit into a chicken wing. Carly smiled.
Freddie ran into the living room. "Sam! You're apartment building is burning down! It's all over the news- ooh Girly Cow. This the new one?"
"Yep. You made it just in time, Freddork." Sam relaxed even deeper into the couch.
Massie arrived, soaking wet, dog in hands. "Ehmagawd! I swear it was nawt my fault! My computer just started smoking."
"My computer once started smoking." Freddie turned to Sam who gave an innocent smile.
"Hi!" She waved. "Now watch your Girly Cow." She mumbled and chugged her root beer. "I don't have any time for this whole guilt thing."
