Disarm Me (With Your Loneliness)
Summary- It's been almost ten years, and not a day goes by when I don't think about her and everything I put her through. Post Season 8 (aka Season Hell, as I like to refer to it) Angsty at first but then a little bit of Zennie goodness at the end. Based off the song by HIM. I own nothing. I just adore Jackie/Hyde and want them together forever.
Each chapter is a little short. So enjoy.
Disarm me with your loneliness
Just like always before
Deceive me out of my emptiness
Telling me how you love
My drinking has increased as the years went by; numbing the pain and suppressing the memories was all I could to be able to get up in the morning...naturally, in the mornings, when I was hungover, all I could see was Jackie. She haunts me, the memories of what I have done haunt me, hell, my entire past still haunts me, and it only gets worse as the day progresses, so sometimes, I take it upon myself to get myself loaded before noon. That way, I can function properly without feeling anything. Seeing as Zen was no longer an option to become a stoic, booze was the next best thing. One thing's for sure though, I am not a stupid drunk, no, in fact I act perfectly normal when I'm drunk, it's when I'm sober when all these damn feelings that start getting to me.
Even as a teenager, I relied on booze and weed, along with Zen, to help me feel detached from all my inner demons that ran wild in my head. It was the perfect, lethal combination. But still... now even booze can ease my insufferable loneliness... it can numb the memories, it was as if my psyche was telling me I can't go on ignoring the pain, but what am I supposed to do? I haven't seen Jackie, or any of my friends in ten years... I completely isolated myself from Point Place... Another swig of the bottle of whiskey and the pain decreases. Whiskey has become more of my thing lately, I loved the burning sensation, it got rid of my pain faster by allowing me to get intoxicated quicker. Whiskey is my only lifeline right now...
Suddenly, a knock at the door... I wonder who it could be at this time of night, I mean it's 3 AM for Christ's sake.
I stumble to the door, trying to gain some composure, damn this stuff is getting me stupidly drunk tonight, I need stash, but I haven't touched weed since our last circle together...
I opened the door and there she stood, still beautiful after all these years.
My breath caught in my throat, and I could only muster a meek, "Jacks..."
"Oh, Steven... I missed you so much."
A/N: I know the song I am basing this off doesn't correlate with the time period, just I was listening to it all morning and since this is my favourite song by HIM, my favourite band, I just thought it described Jackie and Hyde in a nutshell and well here we are with an experimental idea. So Oh well.
Also, I know it might seem a bit ooc for Hyde but I needed him to be very angsty and nostalgic for this piece that I still have no idea where is going, so yeah.
Ugh I also know this chapter may seem crappy, actually this whole story is crap, I apologise, I haven't written for a few months and well, this is the result. Anyways thanks to the guest who actually likes it. I appreciate it.
xoxoxo.
