Dear To My Heart
Chapter 3: Acquainted
Third chapter! Yes, I finally update again. How long's it been? Oh wow. Last time I updated was last September. It's certainly been a long time… Sorry to be so long, I just haven't had the time. It's a short update this time. And I am still not sure how good it is. It gets better! I promise! Enjoy the story!
Disclaimer: I do not own Rurouni Kenshin.
As Kenshin and Kaoru walked back to Kaoru's room, Kaoru spoke up.
"Kenshin, are you ashamed that you were Hitokiri Battousai?"
Kenshin looked up at the princess in surprise and replied softly, "I suppose that's what it would appear to be. I did it to help the country, but maybe I did more bad than good. It seems weak to just say, 'yes, I murdered all those people. I did it for the good of the people. You can't blame me.' No one cares about your motives if you've killed someone dear to them. In their eyes I will always be a cold-blooded murderer."
"But you aren't, Kenshin. You're much more than that. If you didn't truly want change, you would never have accepted this job," Kaoru immediately responded.
"I'm glad you think so, Kaoru-dono. But, there's no way to get the world to understand that." Kenshin allowed a small smile to grace his lips.
"Take it one person at a time. If you can get my family to believe this, then you can get the rest of the world to. Don't rush it. It'll come with time. I can guarantee it," Kaoru said with complete confidence.
"Thank you, Kaoru-dono," Kenshin murmured though his voice was laden with skepticism.
"Don't say it that way, Kenshin. There's no need to be skeptical! You're a living legend and I believe that this can become a reality. Believe me."
"But… your sister. Megumi-dono. She was terrified."
"Forget about Megumi. She came around." Kaoru brushed him off easily.
"That doesn't change her initial reaction, Kaoru-dono."
"Kenshin. Stop being so pessimistic. You can't judge based on first impressions. She's not afraid anymore. She likes you just as much as I do. I'm fine with you being Hitokiri. It makes no difference to me. Besides, you're better company than most. That counts for something, ne?" Kaoru gave a smile.
"Thank you, Kaoru-dono."
"Kenshin, I wish you'd understand. I know you don't. It's okay to want to be accepted. Please think about that," Kaoru said as she pushed open the door to her chambers. She stepped inside and sat down on a chair. Kenshin sat as well at her urging, but he sat uncomfortably. It wasn't the custom for a bodyguard to sit with the one he guards as if an equal.
"I'll give you the tour tomorrow morning. It's a bit late to be wandering around. I do love just standing at my balcony and star-gazing though. The night sky is beautiful at this time," Kaoru stated in an effort to make casual conversation.
"I'm sure it is, Kaoru-dono. I've never done any star-gazing myself. There's no need for you to personally give me the tour. I'm sure a servant can," Kenshin responded.
Kaoru sighed in frustration. "Kenshin. Will you cooperate? I'm trying to make you feel more comfortable. I hate watching you squirm because you're uncomfortable. Just relax. You can forget the customs. I never liked those old-fashioned traditions. Will you please treat me as an equal rather than some goddess that you have to worship?"
"I'm sorry, Kaoru-dono. I've just always been taught –" Kenshin began.
Kaoru cut him off in midsentence. "I know what you've been taught, Kenshin. Don't you think I've been taught the same? No matter what I learned, I refuse to obey rules I don't believe in."
"Hai, Kaoru-dono." Kenshin bowed his head in submission and relaxed, knowing Kaoru was serious.
"Good. I guess we should get some sleep. It's later than I thought," Kaoru commented.
"As you wish, Kaoru-dono." Kenshin bowed.
"Well, you know where your room is and the bathroom is attached. Oyanasumi," Kaoru said, grabbing a brush to brush her hair.
"Oyanasumi, Kaoru-dono," Kenshin murmured and backed into his room to get ready for sleep.
In her room, Kaoru put down her brush and sighed. She wanted her bodyguard to be more at ease with her. It was disconcerting to watch Kenshin squirm simply because she asked him to sit in her presence, and treated him as an equal. She wanted someone that would protect her, but that would be her friend. She didn't want another stiff, "hai Your Highness, iie Your Highness" guy. Too many were in the palace already. With another sigh, she rose from her kneeling position and dressed for bed.
Within Kenshin's own room, he sat and sighed as well. He never expected to get this job, but now that he had it, he had no objections. The woman he was guarding was no different from the civilians he knew except that she had all the luxuries life could ask for. But despite this, Kenshin realized that she was lonelier than anyone. She had no one to confide in, not really. She wanted to treat him as an equal and she didn't degrade people. Instead she felt that there was no need for differences in social status. A slight smile gracing his lips, Kenshin resolved to grant her wish. With that thought, he dressed for bed and fell back under the covers, pondering Kaoru's words.
Bright and early the next morning, both Kenshin and Kaoru rose. Kaoru called out to Komime as she did every morning and Kenshin simply gave a slight knock on the door joining their rooms to signify he was awake. He could tell that Kaoru wouldn't have woken him if she thought him to be asleep. He waited patiently in his room, surveying the surroundings with interest and finally he heard Kaoru's voice call out, "Kenshin! You can come in now!"
As Kenshin walked in, Kaoru smiled and greeted him. "Ohayou, Kenshin. I promised I'd give you the tour. C'mon!"
"Ohayou, Kaoru-dono. As you wish, I will follow." Kenshin bowed respectfully. As Kenshin passed Komime, he gave a slight bow in her direction, acknowledging her as his elder and walked away with Kaoru. Komime smiled at Kenshin distractedly and studied him to gauge what kind of man her highness chose as her bodyguard. She was pleased with what she saw, and left, satisfied.
Outside the room, Kaoru gestured to various rooms and places, telling Kenshin what each was.
"Kenshin, you'll need to know where everything is. It's okay if you need some time to get used to palace life, but Father will be expecting you to know your way around as if you've lived here all your life within a week or so. I'm sorry to ask so much of you so soon, but it's Father's orders," Kaoru informed Kenshin with a slight apologetic tone in her voice.
"It's no problem to me, Kaoru-dono. I'm quite good with landscapes and I have a fair memory. You won't be disappointed," Kenshin replied with a smile.
"I'm glad to hear that, Kenshin. Would you like to see the outside now? Within the palace grounds of course. There's no way my father would allow me out yet. Tell me, Kenshin. Do you have a good grasp of the city layout? Enough to assure my father that I will be safe?"
"I would love to see the outside. And I know enough of the city to navigate easily. It should put His Majesty's nerves at ease." Kenshin spoke cautiously, hoping he wasn't being too casual.
Kaoru was pleasantly surprised at the change in her withdrawn bodyguard. He seemed so different from the night before. "That's great. Let's go then."
Wordlessly, the two walked outside into the fresh air. Princess and bodyguard strolled in the rose garden with leisurely grace. One had been taught to be forever graceful and elegant and seemed to float upon the grounds. The other had to learn the art of silence and grace while displaying deadly skill, stalking with a cat-like grace as if a shadow, never to be seen like a wisp of smoke, in one place yet another at the same time. From afar, a passerby might mistake the two for a couple taking a romantic walk among the roses.
"Kenshin, what do you think of palace life? Is it to your liking?" Kaoru asked, still looking calm as ever. She'd learned to school her features to calmness at all times.
"Well, in the few days I've spent here, I'd say it's very nice to be here," Kenshin responded.
"I'm glad to hear that. Will you leave if it gets too stifling?" Kaoru asked.
"I… don't think I understand your meaning, Kaoru-dono…"
Kaoru sighed. "Kenshin, I mean… will you leave me if you tire of the palace?"
"I… don't think so. It's my duty to always stay by your side, Kaoru-dono," Kenshin responded in faint surprise.
Kaoru only smiled sadly in return.
"Kaoru-dono. You are very lonely, aren't you?"
Kaoru's head snapped up and she regarded Kenshin with a sharp gleam in her eyes. She spoke carefully. "What do you mean? How could you say that?"
"Kaoru-dono, forgive me for being forward, but your actions suggest your loneliness. All I had to do was pay attention."
"I suppose you are right. I've been lonely for some time. I have no objections, but it would be nice to have someone to talk to. My sister… and brother are not the best companions. Sure, I know Sanosuke, and we used to play together as young children, but I was never allowed out of my palace. Now, I have no one to talk to. I'm glad you're here. It really is refreshing to have someone not of royalty to talk to," Kaoru admitted.
"Kaoru-dono, you should allow yourself to open up to others. You seem very withdrawn. I don't suppose I've seen you truly smile with happiness yet. You look as if you smile for the sake of others. Is it because of your loneliness? Or is it something else entirely?" Kenshin asked. Kenshin normally wasn't one for prying, but this woman was different.
Kaoru stared at Kenshin, unable to believe how well he read her. He knew her deepest thoughts, yet he'd spent so little time with her.
"Kenshin, I want to go back inside. I'm a bit tired," Kaoru said abruptly, turning away. Her eyes though, told a different story. They showed how she truly felt. Kenshin followed in confusion, trying to read her jumbled ki.
Fin! With this chapter. How was it? I hope it wasn't disappointing. I put a lot of work into revising it, and I think it actually didn't turn out as bad as I originally thought. (I figured this out after typing, and was too lazy to go back and change the Author's Note up top. Just FYI.) So, I will try to update soon, and Ja ne!
~RHRF
