A/N: Sorry for the delay in posting Part 2! I'm a bit embarrassed by how cheesy this is (some of Ste's lines to Harry are probably way OOC) but I needed it to be cheesy^^ So excited for this episode!


Harry's Proposal Part 2: Ste

Ste paced frantically—back and forth, back and forth—all around the flat. His hands were clasped at his chest, gripping each other, then moving down and out to his sides, shaking, on to his hips, then gripping the back of his neck, elbows out, and back together by his chest again. His feet were little motors, propelled by his anxiety, zipping him round the room.

It was that feeling, like when you get a text back off the person you've fancied for ages, but you're too scared to read straight away; or an email response to that dream job you applied for last week with "congratulations" in the subject line but you're too scared to open it; or like the PC game you'd been waiting 5 years to be released had finally downloaded and installed, but you're too excited to play. All those things…times a thousand. Everything inside Ste was all butterflies and shakes, all jitters and anticipation, like a caffeine high; yet at the same time, he felt like he should be preparing himself, like there was an invisible checklist he needed to tick off before allowing himself to believe it was happening. That it had actually happened. That this might be the beginning of his future. That he might get to be happy...for real.

He glanced over at the table, still covered in mess, the ring sitting in its perfect little box on the edge. His legs were still jelly—or stiff pipes—he couldn't tell which—zipping him aimlessly in zig-zags round the room. He put his hands on his head, as if he could physically find some answers in between his ears. What have I done? Harry thinks I don't want him.

Tony barged in roughly without any warning, turning away as his muffler got caught in the door, and began an ambling monologue immediately. "8 months they've been running the place, and they still can't manage to keep cloves on hand for the spiced cocktails. I mean, what kind of res—what on earth happened here!? Have we been burgled!?" he questioned, finally managing to rescue his clothing from the door and notice the mess.

Ste was still moving in a panic, the wheels in his brain spinning, his hands still shaking.

"Ste!?"

"Hm? Oh—no, no I don't think so," he managed distractedly.

"You don't think so!?" Tony stood, taking in the room, letting his confusion sink in, and noticed Ste's pacing. "What's going on? Why are you pacing back and forth like that? Where's Harry?"

"He—he left, Tony, he left!"

An impossible dread sank on Tony's shoulders and fear moved over his eyes like shadows. "Did…did you do this? Did you lose control again?"

"What!?" Ste looked up, but that didn't stop his legs. "No! How could you even say that!?"

"Ok, sorry," Tony answered defensively. "It's just… Harry put a lot of thought and care into that meal. He was cooking practically all day! The least you could do is—"

"He proposed, Tony! He proposed to me!"

"What?!" Tony's voice was so high and loud, he sounded like a chirping bird. "You mean, like…marriage!?"

"No, to sign up for a gym membership." Ste still managed to retain some of his sarcasm amidst his distress. "Yes, marriage! And he ran out of here thinking I've rejected him because I was in too much shock to answer! What have I done!?"

"What have you done?" Tony sighed, exasperated, shaking his head and looking down at the floor. He grabbed the back of the now strangely-angled sofa and leaned on it for support. He mumbled on, talking to himself. "Of all the daft things that boy's ever—" Tony stopped, took a deep breath, then let it out slowly. He took a moment, his head to the floor, then stood up straight, looking up at Ste…almost fondly. "So you didn't answer him, eh?" He was calm again. Relenting, and gentle. "Why not?" Tentative. Trying to sound casual.

"I don't know!" Ste shouted as he moved, as if asking himself the same question. "I was too shocked, right? And how can he wanna marry me at his age? I mean, he's got his whole life to live, right? I'm only gonna hold him back!"

"Ste," Tony was empathetic. "Come on, after everything you two have been through together, you really think Harry feels like you're holding him back?" Tony chuckled quietly to himself. "Though I reckon he would've left you a long time ago if he had any sense in that thick skull of his."

Ste was too worried to take notice of Tony's little jab. He stopped pacing, but only for a moment, long enough to say his piece—strongly. "But that's my point, right? He's too young to make a decision like that. What if…what if he only thinks it's what he wants now, but he regrets it later? His feelings could change."

Tony moved a coat aside and huffed as he sat on the sofa, watching Ste pace. "You're talking like Harry's an immature kid who can't make his own decisions, when he's the one who's been keeping you in line half the time. Even I can see that."

Ste side-eyed Tony at the tender slight, but couldn't disagree. "Yeah, I know, you're right. He's the real adult in our relationship," he admitted. "Has been for a long time now."

"So…?"

"So that don't change his age, does it? I'm a car crash, and he likes the adventure. What if he gets bored?"

"Ste. I think boredom is the least of your worries," Tony scoffed, shaking his head, giving Ste a bit of a once-over. "Besides, look at how happy he's been spending time with you and the kids. He couldn't stop going on about how great Lucas is at football, and when he found out about Leah's advert audition—I've never seen him so excited."

Ste stopped pacing for good this time, letting his nerves settle in his shaking arms. "Why are you saying all this? Reckoned you'd be going on about how he's making the biggest mistake of his life."

Tony let out a laugh. Ste really looked at Tony, for the first time since he'd entered the flat. His best friend's face radiated warmth and a calmness that confused him. "Yeah, well that may be. But it's his mistake to make, and I gave up trying to split you two up a long time ago. And…" Tony looked up at Ste, a vulnerability in his eyes, and was it…gratitude? "I know I haven't been close with my son for very long, but…" He paused, and made his confession. "He was a mess before he met you." For the second time tonight, Ste was rendered speechless. He was in shock. "As mad as this sounds, I reckon you've saved him just as much as he's saved you."

The two men fell silent, Tony on the sofa, Ste stood a few feet away, taking in Tony's heartfelt words. Ste had always thought of Harry's feelings for him as being something the young man couldn't control, and that he couldn't help but love Ste despite the chaos Ste caused in his life—despite how "bad" an influence Ste was. Even though Harry had told him countless times himself, it had never quite sunk in that he might have actually changed Harry's life for the better. That he could do—and was doing—for Harry what Harry had done for him time and time again. He had chalked up Harry's love declarations to blinding, young first love—the kind that could prevent you from seeing the truth, even the possible truth that that love was damaging. But Tony's admission opened Ste's eyes wide. He wasn't damaging Harry at all. I've saved him. I can save him.

He was moved deeply, but it still didn't shake his doubts that this was what Harry truly wanted. "But what if he only asked 'cos he thinks I don't take him serious or summat? Like, I've been married before, and he thinks we're not enough if we don't get hitched?"

"Well, you need to ask him that yourself don't ya!?" Tony grunted as he stood, smiling fondly at his son-in-law-to-be. "What are you doing stood here jabbering on to me about it, eh?" He took Ste's shoulders and gave him a playful shake. "Go, talk to your boyfriend. Tell him how you feel. Ask him how he feels, yeah?" Ste looked thoughtfully into Tony's eyes, seeing the wisdom he so often forgot. Tony stiffened and lightened quickly, before the mood got too sentimental. "Honestly, you two are like a couple of old hens sometimes; what am I gonna do with ya?" Tony scoffed, as he pushed Ste toward the door. He moved like a flash and grabbed Ste's suit jacket, tossing it to him. "Oi!" he shouted, and Ste caught it before opening the door.

"Cheers, Tony," Ste said, and he meant it.

"Don't mention it," Tony replied turning back toward the kitchen. Then loudly, "And ask Harry what all this mess is about, 'cos God knows I ain't cleaning it up!" He turned back toward the door, and a quiet smile lit up his face. Ste had already gone.


Harry's elbows were leaning on the rails of the village wall, looking out over the darkness. His lone silhouette looked thoughtful from under the faint light of the lamp posts overhead. Ste could recognise Harry's strong, sturdy, yet delicate frame anywhere, but he studied his figure as he approached as if seeing him for the first time. How had this boy—this young man—come to mean so much to him? Ste's feelings had crept up on him, and though he remembered being smitten with Harry straight away, those feelings were nothing compared to what Harry meant to him now. Harry was his whole world—if Harry hadn't been around the past year, where would Ste be today? He would be lost, or dead, or…unhappy.

I'm happy. Ste realised he knew what real happiness felt like now, for the first time in his life—true, unobstructed, steadfast happiness. That real kind of happiness that has all the décor—all the blinding sparks, and lightening glitter, and screaming confetti on the outside—but is anchored inside by roots thick as logs, penetrating deep into the earth in an intricate, expansive web that even the strongest hurricane could never uproot. Harry had given that to him. When he'd least expected it, in the most unlikely of circumstances—his own best mate's son—he'd found the person he could—and desperately wanted to—spend the rest of his life with, without a single regret or fear. He hadn't thought about it so consciously before now, but Harry's question had forced the truth in front of him, like a huge, boldfaced headline in black and white. How could I not have seen? A tear dropped down his cheek in bittersweet realisation.

As Ste walked toward the wall, he could hear upbeat party tunes blasting from inside the loft, and as he passed Nightingales, he caught glimpses of a rather upscale clientele enjoying hors d'oeuvres and cocktails with a background of big band music and jovial chatter permeating out into the dark square. He could hear fireworks far off in the distance; celebrations to ring in the new year had already begun. As he walked up the stairs and approached Harry, he realised he hadn't planned a single thing to say. His heart started beating out of his chest, and his hands and knees were shaking so much he almost stopped and turned back so he could calm down. But his need to talk to and comfort the man he loved far outweighed his fears.

"Do you remember the first time I followed you up here?" Ste's voice caught Harry by surprise, and he quickly wiped a tear away from his face. "Feels like just yesterday and forever ago at the same time, don't it?"

Harry didn't answer, just stared out into the village, clearly avoiding Ste's eyes. Ste tentatively walked up so he was stood right beside his boyfriend, and put his elbows on the railing as well. It felt so good just to be next to him again. "You were only 17 then." He allowed himself a small chuckle as the memory of Harry running back to boarding school materialised more vividly in his mind. "Back then, you were just a daft, stubborn kid."

"So that's all you thought of me?" Harry's voice was scratchy; he was tired from so many tears.

"I was already falling in love with ya. I realised it when I knew I couldn't let you go."

Harry looked down, letting Ste's words settle, letting them sink in. Ste could hear the faint sounds of men unloading boxes somewhere below them, on the other side of the wall. Preparations for the fireworks display organised by Nightingale's.

Ste continued, turning to look at Harry's darkened profile. "And now—" Ste felt a little embarrassed—he wasn't good with words, but no way was that stopping him—"you've grown up before my eyes, Harry, and I'm so proud of ya I can barely stand it. I can't believe the man you've become. I can't believe how you seem to become a stronger, better person every day. I can't believe I can be stronger and better too, with you. But it's happening, right?" Ste leaned in, hoping his words were getting through. "We're just getting better and better and I wanna keep getting better with you for the rest of my life."

Harry turned, a frown creasing between his eyes. He looked deeply at Ste. "Then why did you—" He changed gear. "Back then, I ran off 'cos you pushed me away. Just like you're still doing now."

Ste sighed. "I know. 'Cos I'm an idiot, right? Always have been, always will be."

"You're not an idiot, Ste. But how many times do I need to tell you I love you and I wanna be with you before you'll believe it?"

Ste smiled. "Dunno. Guess we're gonna have to stay together until we find out." He nudged Harry's side with his elbow. He knew his vain attempts to lighten the mood wouldn't work, but he needed to try.

"I'm serious, Ste," Harry said in frustration, taking a step away and facing Ste. "It hurts me every time you doubt my feelings. It hurts me you doubt me so much." He turned away again, another tear finding its way along the trail down Harry's moist cheek.

"Hey," Ste stepped toward him and grabbed Harry's upper arms firmly, turning him so they were face to face. "I could never doubt you, okay? Never." Ste couldn't help himself, and grabbed Harry's head to wipe the tears off his face with his thumbs. Why do I do this? Why do I hurt him so much? "It's me I'm always doubting, right? Doubting that I'm the person you should be with." Harry shook his head with a painful frown, like there wasn't a single more ridiculous idea on the planet. No one looks at me the way he does.

"But today—what you did…" Ste couldn't hold back a wide smile and a chuckle, "proposing to me in the middle of some kinda home invasion gone wrong…" He looked back into Harry's eyes and he turned sincere again. "You made me see that I can be good for ya. That I can work hard every day to make your life better, and I wanna do that so bad, Harry. I wanna be there for ya, and take care of ya, and for you to be the best, most strong person you are 'cos you know that no matter what happens, I'll be there right beside ya, ready to catch ya whenever you need catching."

Harry looked down and smiled in spite of himself, like he wanted to remain firm and stoic in his anger at Ste, but couldn't hold back the pleasure from showing on his face at being serenaded by the least articulate man in Hollyoaks. He blushed. Still felt butterflies just watching Harry's reaction. I love it when he does that. Harry gave up his stubbornness, wearing the effects Ste's romantic speech had had on his face proudly, and looked up at him again with wide eyes and an equally wide smile. "You already do that."

"Do I? 'Cos it don't feel like it sometimes."

"It's 'cos you do it without thinking you're doing it. Without even realising, you do it."

Ste's smile was so deep it hurt. Painful bliss. They suddenly turned their heads as they heard a crowd of jovial voices escape from Nightingales, as the patrons gathered outside slipping scarves round their shoulders, happy and tipsy, waiting for the fireworks display.

"I just…Harry, why did you propose? I mean, really? 'Cos if you think we're not enough now, you're wrong, right?" Ste let all his fears and anxious thoughts spill out of him, and it felt good. He could tell Harry anything. "We're amazing, just as we are; you know that, right? I know I've been married before, but if you think I'm expecting anything from ya…all I want is to be with ya, ok? You're young, and I just don't wanna see you pushing yourself into—"

"Ste." This time it was Harry to grab Ste's arms, and do the reassuring. "I didn't ask you 'cos I wanna prove something; I didn't ask you 'cos I wanna seem older, or show you that I'm serious about ya. I asked ya, 'cos you make me happy every day, and 'cos when I think about my future, you're always in it. Through the good and the bad, you're always there, and I can't bear the thought of you not being there. End of."

Ste smiled through watery eyes. "Ditto."

Harry lowered his arms to hold Ste's hands. Ste's stomach still rolled over when Harry touched him. Every time. "Yeah?" Harry searched Ste's face with probing eyes.

"Yeah," Ste answered, still not sure if he could trust that this was really happening. He swallowed. "And you're sure this is what you really want?" Ste remembered asking Harry the exact same question more than a year ago, back before he knew how much the lad would mean to him.

"I've never been more sure of anything in my whole life." The same answer now as it was then. Ste longed to be as sure of himself as Harry was. But if there was one thing he was sure of, it was this.

"Then… I think we should do it. I mean, I wanna do it. More than anything. 'Cos I can't see my future without you in it either, Harry, and I don't wanna spend another day of my life without ya."

Crack. Crack crack. Ste got the most beautiful view of Harry's beaming face lit up in yellow and blue, just as the fireworks started popping directly overhead. He could hear the sounds of cheering from below in the village, but they were distant somehow, as if from behind a closed door. The cacophony around them did nothing to break their focus from each other. Ste looked at Harry's bright face, lit up by thousands of little chemical bursts in the sky above them…and he laughed. It was a laugh of relief, or fear—probably both—as he realised they'd made it, made it past another hurdle, taken another step, crossed another bridge together, and everything was fine. Everything was just…right, and good, and as it should be.

Harry laughed too, and their arms found each other in the chaos around them.

They were close now, held in each other's arms, face to face, but Ste had to speak up so his voice could be heard over the roars of people's shouts and the cracks and booms of beautiful fire flowers bursting overhead, shooting up all round them, lighting up their faces like magnificent dark rainbows. He was giddy. "But if you change your mind, Mr. Thompson, I don't think I could take it, right? 'Cos I'm dead serious about this, and now we're doing it, I realise I want it more than I've ever wanted anything, so—"

"I'm not gonna change my mind." Harry's voice was loud but intimate, his smile all bliss and disbelief and passion. "I could never change my mind. I'll always want you."

Harry kissed him, and Ste kissed back, holding his perfect young man, holding on to him for dear life. The cold, the noise, the sparks, the sulphur in the air—none of it mattered. If he could have more moments, more time, more life with Harry, he promised himself he would treasure every second of it. And treasure Harry, the man who was saving him, and he was saving right back.