Authors Note:

(A Christmas gift for MuffinLordLionsGate )

Another oneshot from the fem!seph universe. This one occurs two years after last chapter.

Oh, and I love reviews and feedback. I simple "I like" or "I don't like" are better than nothing.

Rating(chapter): T

Word Count: 3,671

Warning(s): This chapter is angst with a touch of romance, rather than humor. So yeah…You have been warned.

Pairing(s): SephirothxTseng (one-sided romantic…sort of)

Summary: We all have to face our fears one day. Sephiroth had hoped that day would never come. When it does, it is up to a certain Turk to help her to learn to breathe again.

The Devil Wears High Heels

By Catsitta

Scene three: Learning to breathe again

Trapped.

She was completely and utterly trapped. All around her was debris: great chunks of concrete and twisted spears of steel framework, the ground littered with glass. It was so dark…Sephiroth could barely see a thing with her mako-enhanced vision. A weight pressed against her chest. She could not breathe. Her entire body ached and pain flared where the wreckage pierced her skin.

Gaia, was this it? Was she going to die like this, trapped and alone in the suffocating darkness?

Tears prickled in her eyes, threatening to spill onto bruised and blistered cheeks. At least nothing was on fire after the explosion; a slow, agonizing death by burning alive would be a dreadful way to die…but choking on newfound fear, the young General wondered it that end would have been preferable to this. She closed her eyes and tried to ignore the crushing weight that made it impossible to breathe and the fact that every breath of dust-tainted air she did manage to inhale sent her into a coughing fit.

Sephiroth replayed the events that led to this inside her head, hoping—no, praying—that this was not real…that she was lying unconscious in the medical ward.

It all started out so routine. Just a simple patrol. Nothing more.

Her, Genesis and Angeal were together: it was ShinRa's way of saying to the public "We care" without doing a thing. Having the three poster children of the company out on the streets among the common people was his favorite way of bolstering support. It was also a bit of an unspoken rule that the trio humor the admiring public by standing for photographs, shaking hands and the like.

Angeal had just finished waving goodbye to a friendly young couple and they were walking away when it happened. The dark-haired SOLDIER opened her mouth to speak, and the whole world seemed to go crazy in that instant. Bullets ripped through the air and the whirl of helicopter blades signaled that the Turks were involved. Shouts mingled and mixed into the frenzy, but by then Sephiroth was practically overwhelmed by the sounds around her and could hear almost nothing aside from the steady hum of battle.

Drawing Masamune, the young General searched the area for the fight and realized that the enemy was on the ground and moving surprisingly fast. They were clad in full body armor that likely boosted their speed and strength, and wielded machine guns. Well, most of them did. The probable leader of the group brandished a laser pistol that cut through steel like butter.

As Sephiroth charged the grounded foe, the man fired a blast at her feet, the force of which sent her flying sideways. The proud katana she prized so dearly slipped from her fingers as she went tumbling across the street. She barely managed to get onto her hands and knees when another blast hit the sidewalk beneath her, leaving an impressive crater as well as sending her crashing through the first story window of an executive building.

The glass was bothersome as she passed through it, but what made the situation worse was the fact that she no longer had a weapon. Defenseless against the enemy, Sephiroth dropped her pride for the time being and began executing the evacuation of the building. With people in such a panic, it was a difficult task to manage, and when she finished, it took every ounce of self-control not to leap blindly into the fray.

That self-control was costing her dearly now.

As she checked the floors for stragglers, the building began to tremble and rock. Next thing she knew, the Turk helicopter came crashing through the tenth-story window, blades still spinning dangerously. Sephiroth dodged the aircraft but there was nothing she could do about the following explosion.

The massive machine was harmless enough until the guy with the fucking laser gun blasted it with another shot causing the whole thing to become a shrapnel bomb. Fate was enjoying the misery of the Turks and SOLDIERs because that explosion caught the framework perfectly, resulting in a terrible tremor before the building began to collapse. Sephiroth tried to run and jump through a window, knowing her enhanced body would take the impact of falling ten floors with ease.

But, before she could, a massive spear of twisted steel groaned and lanced the ground at her feet. In a desperate struggle, she tried to keep her balance but the floor gave out and she went crashing downwards…Then, she hit the ground and her whole body went numb for a moment. All around her things were falling. Sephiroth instinctually covered her face and tried to curl up but a something collapsed on top of her, knocking all the breath from her lungs.

Now, she found herself still trapped beneath the rubble, wanting nothing more than to see the light again. This was not how she was supposed to die. She was a SOLDIER; her death was to come honorably in battle, not because some terrorists decided to crash a helicopter into a building and collapsed it while she was inside.

Desperately, she fought to free herself. SOLDIER strength finally overcame the burden on her chest and Sephiroth did wiggle free but the weight remained. Eyes flicking around the crowded shadows, her breathing quickening, the silver-haired teenager barely realized that she was no longer trapped. Caught in this prison of metal and concrete, Sephiroth began to feel her fear grow even more. It was even harder to breath now. Claustrophobia. She never thought her discomfort in crowds and small spaces would ever turn into a paralyzing fear. But the stress was enough to disable whatever function was keeping her from becoming completely impaired in this confined space.

For the first time in her eighteen years, the great General of the ShinRa military screamed for help.

000X000

Two hours, seventeen minutes and thirty-eight seconds after the building collapsed, the emergency crew managed to clear the wreckage that imprisoned Sephiroth. To everyone's surprise (and to some, their relief), the silver-haired General lay curled up and unmoving, her uniform in shreds, revealing half-healed wounds.

"Sephy!"Came a cry from the crowd that still lingered around the wreckage. Murmurs spread like a ripple in the water as a distraught Genesis tore through the security line. Auburn hair free of its tie and tangled with filth, the glamorous SOLDIER looked to be but a shell of her usual self. Bruises and healing marks mottled her normally perfect skin. But what brought a quiet to the crowd was the sheer fear in her eyes and voice. Nothing scared Genesis.

The Commander dashed through the ruined mess and stumbled to Sephiroth's side.

"Genesis, get back here." It was Angeal who spoke, her brusque tone abandoned for a kinder one. With the auburn Commander's long coat in her hands, the dark-haired SOLDIER hurried to her side and threw the garment over the thin, now shaking shoulders. Genesis was crying. "Sush, girl, Seph's going to be okay."

Trembling with shock, grief and anger, Genesis refused to look at her friend. Sephiroth was not okay. She was fucking unconscious. A damn building fell on top of her! And…and…a wail escaped the auburn teen's lips, the sound enough to send chills down Angeal's spine.

"Get her out of here," one of the rescue workers ordered,"we can't have distressed individuals getting in the way." Angeal nodded and began to pull the older female away from the youngest of the trio. Genesis screamed and wrestled away from the dark-haired Commander. "You heartless bitch! We can't abandon her like this."

"Gen…" There was pain in the other SOLDIER's voice. It was no easier on her than it was on Genesis.

"Don't 'Gen' me, 'Geal. You know how much Sephy hates doctors. You know what she will think if she wakes up in the hospital alone. She needs us, 'Geal. Please." The anger that laced the eldest of the trio's voice faded into desperation. Normally golden eyes were gray with anguish. Rarely did Genesis's hazel gaze ever shift to such a color.

Feeling as if someone had just dropped a lead weight on her chest, Angeal shuddered with defeat. "We will stay, Gen, but only if you come over here and keep from bothering the rescue squad." Too weak to protest. Genesis stepped backwards, away from Sephiroth's curled form, and leaned against Angeal's sturdy frame. Two strong arms wrapped around her shoulders.

Together, the two Commanders watched with heavy hearts as Sephiroth was whisked away from the scene. The last they say of their friend and General before the ambulance doors slammed shut, was the bustle of men as they staunched still bleeding wounds and stuck an IV into her arm.

"She's gone," Genesis whispered, her throat sore from crying.

"Shush, Gen, Sephy is going to be okay. C'mon, if we hurry, perhaps we can be there when she wakes up." Angeal offered quietly. The auburn teen nodded and tugged her coat a little tighter about her shoulders.

000X000

Sephiroth dreamed of darkness.

She was trapped again, but this time, it was not by a building but in the confines of a mako tank. The glass tube was a barrier even she could not break. Shouting, she pounded on the smooth walls with desperation, shouting for someone to release her. Only… no one came.

Hojo's voice filled the darkness, his words but garbled nonsense.

Sephiroth pinned herself against the back of the tube, only then realizing that she was a child of no more than eight years. Suddenly, green danced in the shadows at her feet but she knew that it was not light. Burning pain lanced through her limbs like liquid fire, sending her into a twitching fit. But the pain never dulled, it only grew more intense as the mako rose higher and higher, passing her knees, then her hips…when it reached her shoulders she felt the breath catch in her throat.

She could not breathe.

Soon the mako went above her head.

Drowning. Trapped. No escape. So much pain.

Everything now hued in green, every nerve alive with agony, Sephiroth finally gave up on clinging to fragile consciousness. She closed her eyes. Each time she did, she feared that she would never wake…or that would, and this would happen all over again. Because someplace small inside of her remained weak and frightened. All she wanted was to escape.

Escape…

Yes. Escape and breathe air, not the toxic fluid that flooded her lungs…

But fortunately, this time at least, it was only a dream.

Opening her eyes, Sephiroth took in a deep gulp of oxygen. A gentle hand stroke her brow, pushing aside damp bangs. She glanced at the figure standing near and realized that the world appeared to be but a blur.

Smiling weakly, she offered a fragile,"Thank you."

To which the figure replied in a distinctly male voice, one she both recognized and adored,"You're welcome." As unconsciousness returned, she heard the sound of retreating footsteps. But, her dreams were not filled with drowning; instead, they were filled with brown-eyes and a mysterious smile.

000X000

In the days following the accident, Sephiroth spent a majority of her time recovering in her room, since she refused to stay in the hospital. Genesis and Angeal rarely left her side, and the former of the two was a jittery wreck who constantly checked to see if the silver teen was feeling okay. Feeling smothered by their attentions, she did her best to politely dismiss them for the third time in one day, claiming that she was feeling tired.

Angeal had to literally carry Genesis from the room beneath her arm, but as the door shut behind them, the young General could not help but let out a sigh of relief. She loved her friends, really, she did. But from the moment she woke up, it was like she was suffocating all hours of the day and night. Even alone, Sephiroth could not help but warily gaze at the walls of her room and feel slightly uneasy. But with Genesis at every turn, there was no banishing the panic that threatened to arise in her chest.

It was…disturbing.

As the General of the ShinRa army, such fear was not permissible. She had to be brave and strong, nothing could be seen as a weakness. But then, why did she feel so delicate? Growing up in the labs made her tough and hard to even make hesitate. Monsters did not scare her. Pain did not bother her. Only the thought of actually drowning in one of those damned tubes every made her falter. Confined spaces were never her best friend, but she could handle them. Now, Sephiroth had a feeling that her closet might set off her paranoia and fear.

Ridiculous, really. But…

Sephiroth closed her eyes and let out a sigh. Would things ever return to normal?

000X000

A month later, when 'normality' seemed to return, disaster decided to play a trick on Sephiroth. Said disaster came in the form of a mischievous baby Turk (as they deem their newest recruits for some peculiar reason) whom decided it would be funny to shut the great General in a supply closest. She had gone into the small space to fetch a canister of coffee for the machine in her office (since her new secretary recently 'took ill' and was not there to do so), and had left the door wide open.

In dealing with her newfound phobia, the silver General rarely closed the door to any space smaller than her office unless there were decently sized windows through which she could escape. It was a subtle habit and no one but those in her close association would be able to notice the change in behavior. Well, no one but the Turks, but they knew everything.

Suddenly trapped in the confined space, Sephiroth found her chest tightening with panic. The coffee tin in her hand fell to the floor and she collapsed against the wall. It would have been so much simpler to merely open the door. Even if the trickster had locked it, freedom was hers to gain. But all reasoning fled her mind the moment the door clicked shut. Memories of being trapped beneath the wreckage and of drowning in a glass tube assaulted her. Her breathing grew ragged. Tear flooded her eyes.

She felt so weak…so helpless…

Curling up into a tight ball, she begged to every god and goddess that could possibly be out there. She just wanted this nightmare to end.

The door slowly opened. Light flooded the partial darkness. Footsteps, slow and soft, signaled the presence of another. A gentle hand caressed her shoulder, then her back, before coaxing her chin to tilt up. Sephiroth blinked. Gazing at her with understanding was Tseng. The man she fell in love with as a young teenager and for whom she still harbored a crush on even after discovering his…preferences.

Saying nothing, the Turk helped the silver General to her feet, holding her steady when she faltered.

"T-thank you."

"You're welcome…"

Tseng smiled warmly at her, though the expression was brief, she saw understanding in those dark-brown eyes. He may wear a blue suit and sunglasses, and his loyalties may differ from her own, but there was still a lot she could respect about the man. His confidentiality was one. She knew that no one would hear of this incident and the baby Turk that locked her in the closest would no doubt be punished for his actions.

"Why did you help me?" Sephiroth asked as she at last regained control of her body, both her movements and her breathing steady.

He remained quiet for a moment, studying her with those mysterious eyes before saying,"I know what it is like…feeling overwhelmed by a fear."

The General shook her head,"I can't feel fear. It's weakness…it's…"

"Natural. Human. We all have things we are afraid of, General. In fact, the definition of courage is overcoming our fears."

"I…I can't…"

"What, General? You cannot be courageous? You cannot overcome a mere fear? You are the most powerful SOLDIER alive. You have faced down enemies with a smile that would have most men frozen with terror. This is a foe you cannot touch, but it can be conquered nonetheless."

The pair watched each other for a long while in silence.

"I don't know how. I have never been afraid before." Sephiroth found herself flushing with embarrassment and shame. "This is something I am unfamiliar with. A force that can shake me but I cannot even hope to touch."

"Then let me help you."

"What?"

Tseng placed a hand on Sephiroth's shoulder,"I said: Then let me help you."

"How do you propose doing that?"

"I'll teach you to breathe."

"I know how t—"

"Trust me." Those warm eyes returned before disappearing beneath a pair of dark sunglasses. It was only then that Sephiroth realized that they were walking together towards the elevator. She shook her head. The elevator was a trial she avoided and she would bet a year's salary that Tseng knew.

"I can't." She repeated.

"You mean that you won't." The Turk stated coldly,"Don't be a coward, General."

"I am no coward!"

"Then trust me…" It was a whisper but the silver teen heard it loud and clear. Closing her eyes, Sephiroth nodded. Together, the pair stepped into the glass prison and she could not help but shudder with dread when it began to move. "Open your eyes."

Instead of seeing Midgar as every other person did, she saw the inside of Hojo's lab. Panic swelled in her chest, and her eyes flicked to the floor. Green seeped from between the tiles and flooded the small space. In a matter of seconds, the liquid reached her throat, smothering her screams.

"SEPHIROTH!" Hearing her name broke the image cast by her feverish mind. No longer was the elevator filling with mako. She was not trapped in a glass tube. A shiver crawled down her spine. "Breathe…just breathe." She shook her head. A gentle hand stroked her back and face. "Breathe. There is nothing to be afraid of."

"I-I…I'm not afraid." The silver General growled in protest,"I fear nothing."

"Then prove it: Breathe."

Sephiroth took in a deep breath, flooding her lungs with much needed oxygen. She blinked. Again, she took in another unhurried, un-panicked breath. Nothing toxic assailed her. No mako. No dust. There was no pain. When the elevator DING'ed and the door slid open, she realized she was not trapped. All that time she spent in denial…in fear. A blush overtook her features.

"Thank you…again." She admitted begrudgingly,"If you had not have…"

"Think nothing of it, General." A cold weight dropped in Sephiroth's gut. She let Tseng see her weaker side, trusted him, and then he tries to walk away…dismissing everything! Anger replaced shame and she grabbed Tseng's arm as she stormed out of the elevator. Shoving a few unsuspecting secretaries out of the way, the silver teen finally found a place where she knew there were no people and no cameras.

With her eyes bright, Sephiroth shoved Tseng against the wall, holding him aloft by the front of his shirt. His glasses became skewed upon impact and dangled crookedly from one ear. The Turk looked surprised, if not a little frightened. Good.

"What is the meaning of this, General?" His hands were tight around the teen's wrists, but her SOLDIER strength made it nearly impossible for him to escape. It did not help that she stood taller than he, so even while he could not touch the ground, she was still looking down at him.

"I trust you, Tseng." It came out almost like a threat…perhaps it was. "Do not dismiss my trust…or my thanks so easily."

"Is that what this nonsense is about?"

"Not entirely." At that, the General's expression softened and she allowed him to slide back to the floor, none worse for wear. "It…is difficult for me to say this, but I must. I trust few people, Tseng and my gratitude is expressed to even fewer. Do not take either lightly."

"I would not dream of doing so."

"Then there is only one more matter to attend to then."

"There is?"

Sephiroth smirked, her eyes flicking to floor for a moment.

"I have spent years trying to get your attention, Tseng. Only, I have had…troubles in doing so. You see, two years ago was the first time I wore these shoes…" The Turk glanced down at the black high heels with green straps crossing over the foot. "and I had hoped to garner your…interest."

It was Tseng's turn to blush, his olive skin taking on a darker hue.

"Tell me Tseng, would you protest if I were to grant my knight-in-shining armor a kiss?" She brushed her fingertips against his face the way Genesis taught her to. Until this moment, she never thought she would ever use that cheesy line on anybody. But Gaia, even after seeing him kiss that man in the hallway, her fondness for the Turk had not waned. "You did help me learn to breathe again, after all."

"A kiss?"

Sephiroth nodded, feeling very much like the girl of eighteen years that she was. When it came to matters of the heart, she was an absolute klutz, but now had seemed like the best time to breech the subject. To perhaps, sow the first seeds of hope…of friendship…of something more, even.

"I see no…harm…" The tiniest of frowns furrowed between Tseng's brows.

Delighted at his response, Sephiroth abandoned her shyness and wrapped her arms around his neck, her lips meeting his. One could say that this was a perfect moment, or in truth, admit that it was a disaster. Because the next thing either of them knew, there was the flash of a camera and they both sprung apart.

"What the—?" The silver General froze upon seeing laughing, golden eyes.

"Awe, isn't that the cutest! Sephy's first kiss."

000X000

A/N: ( Um, review please. Man, I really am on an angst kick…)