Chapter Three: To die of food poisoning

Disclaimer: See chapter two, that will hopefully lead you to see chapter one.

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Eowyn, the shield maiden of Rohan was known for many things; her strength, her bravery, and her fighting skills.

She, the one woman brave, courageous enough, to ride into open battle dressed as a man, the only one who could stand up to the witch king, the one who slew him, and then stole the heart of the steward's son.

Eowyn was famous, loved, and respected for many great deeds, skills, and talents.

Cooking was not one of these talents.

"Um…Eowyn dear, do…we…I…do we have to eat this…food?"

"Of course, Faramir honey! I spent all morning persuading the cooks to let me into the kitchen, and all afternoon making dinner for you all!"

The steward and his wife had invited all their closest friends to a dinner party, the guests (Aragorn, Gimli, Legolas, Arwen, Eomer, and Imrahil) had all eagerly accepted their invitation and arrived as early as they could.

And most of them had been happy until they found out that Eowyn had insisted on making dinner.

Arwen of course, stayed supportive and encouraging throughout the whole thing, insisting that the others ate the product Eowyn's hard work (it was not lost on any of the others that Arwen had not eaten a bite of Eowyn's …food).

"Pass the…potatoes… Legolas…please."

"Those are potatoes? I thought they were…er…sausages…"

Aragorn and Legolas shared a look and began coughing into their napkins.

"Gimli, what kind of soup is this?"

"Soup? What soup? oh! You mean this lovely shoe polish Eowyn provided for us?"

There were now four people coughing into their napkins.

"Eowyn, dear sister...you really shouldn't have gone to all the trouble of making this meal for us…you could have just let the cooks do it…I mean, how long did it take you to make that roasted partridge?"

"Eomer, don't be silly! That's not roasted partridge! It's wintertime! That's chocolate cake!"

There was a long pause, and then everybody started coughing into their napkins.

Eowyn looked around in distress at everyone, they were clearly very uncomfortable, finally she realized what was bothering everyone.

"You really don't have to eat my dinner you know…" She began to say, Arwen was about to object when she held up a hand, "I realize how hard it is for you all to say this, and it was really very polite of you not to tell me…but now I know the truth of the matter."

"You all have horrible colds don't you? And you came to my dinner just to make me and Faramir happy! You really shouldn't have!"

An awkward silence ensued…Faramir muttered an incomprehensible excuse and left the table, while all the others were left speechless.

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Epilogue

Eowyn had insisted that they all go to bed at once, and had excused them from the table, she said that she felt terrible about making them all come over to Rohan with such serious colds. Gimli thought about mentioning the inability of elves to get sick, but thought better of it.

That night when Gimli and Legolas were alone in the room they discussed dinner.

"It was a good thing I held my tongue back there, or Eowyn might have killed you with her food."

"Nay, friend Gimli…if you hadn't held you tongue, I would have killed you with my bare hands."

"At least I didn't ask about the fried chicken."

Fin.

Note: Everything that you don't know tastes like chicken. Unless you're Chinese… Ah well…third chapter and counting.