The Song Remains the Same
by Sara M
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Disclaimer: The characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer are owned by Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, and Fox studios. This story is not meant to infringe upon anyone's rights, only to entertain.
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Chapter
Eleven
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Sweet Sixteen
"Dawn!"
Pause, then louder, "Dawn!"
Janice was worried about her friend these days. She seemed to be in another world sometimes, and something at home just wasn't right. Like right now. It was full-on dark, and everyone had left basketball cheerleading tryouts already, but Janice's mother refused to drive away until she was certain that all the girls had been picked up. Not for the first time, Janice noticed that Dawn was left alone at some school event, waiting for her ride home. And once again Janice's mom would offer to give her a ride, and Dawn would make some excuse for her absent mother. She just wished Dawn would talk to her about whatever was going on, because it was becoming more obvious to others now, and no one knew what was behind it. As best friend, Janice felt she should have the inside scoop, and she knew less than nothing. Janice was usually the one who knew all the dirt first, wherever and whatever it was. She didn't like being out of the loop on this one.
"Da-awn!"Janice bellowed one more time. This time the girl turned her head her way and waved. "Come on, we'll give you a lift!" Finally! Janice watched Dawn pick up her bag and start walking slowly over to their minivan.
Dawn hated this part. The part where no one came for her and she was forced to take rides from some other mother, another mother who ever so politely gave her the third degree about her mother's whereabouts. Janice was her best friend, but her mom was the nosiest of all, and stuck to the subject like a bloodhound. It was getting harder and harder to come up with convincing lies. So she just smiled and tried to hop in the back. Janice's mom wouldn't let her get away though, and insisted she sit up front in the passenger seat with her. The better to grill me.
As they drove home, there was blessed silence for about two minutes while Janice's mom worked her way up to asking all her questions.
"So, Dawn, we didn't see your mom at the Mother's Tea last Saturday."
Great. "Yeah, she had a bad headache and needed to lie down."
"She's been having lots of headaches lately..."
Dawn nodded silently and looked out the window.
Janice's mom wasn't going to stop now. "Is she seeing a doctor for them? Does she know what is causing them?"
Janice's mom will plaster on fake concern and smile encouragingly to get me to open up right about now. Yep, right on cue.
"Yeah, but they're not anything too bad, just hurt I guess."
"I see." Dawn was quiet again, so Janice's mom tried another tack. "Your sister must be very cold right now."
Huh?
Dawn frowned a second and then
smoothed into the lie she needed to tell. If she could just figure
out what Janice's mom was talking about, she'd actually know what lie
that was supposed to be. She turned to Janice's mom and said as
casually as she could, "Yeah, she probably is." Whatever
that means.
"I was just
so surprised to hear that she was attending school in Switzerland
this term, it seemed so sudden."
"Yeah, it probably
seemed like it, but Buffy'd been talking about going for a long time
now, she wanted to go to school...some where else...see
what...Europe...was all about..." Hope
that sounded realistic, cuz I don't know what the hell I'm talking
about any more. Switzerland!! God, mom! Way to deal with reality
there.
"Really? I didn't
get the impression that Buffy was so studious. I can't imagine there
are a lot of things to do in a Swiss boarding school."
"I guess. Buffy didn't really talk to me about it much, she just wanted to go is all I know."
"I can't imagine Buffy somewhere without boys!" Janice's mom smiled, and watched Dawn's reaction closely.
Thank God! We're at my house. Get me outta here!
"You'd
be surprised." What the hell
does that mean?! I don't even know what I'm saying any more.
Gah!
"Well, tell your
mother I hope she feels better soon. We're hoping we can talk her
into chairing the committee for the Annual Eighth Grade Valentine's
Day Dance this year. She has such a gift for organizing these events,
you know."
"Yeah, I'll tell her." Dawn turned and said her goodbyes to her friend and her mother, and noted that they waited at the curb until she actually entered her house. She waved them on, and Janice's mother finally pulled away from the curb as Dawn closed the door.
Dark. The house was dark again.
"Mom!"
Silence.
"Mom!"
Still nothing.
Dawn searched the downstairs then ascended the stair case and checked the master bedroom. No mom. She heard a noise from Buffy's room. Following it there, she stood in the doorway and watched quietly for a moment.
Joyce sat in the wing chair to the side of Buffy's bed, holding a family album in her lap and a glass of...what?...Scotch?...in the other. It was now full night, and no light was on. Dawn wondered how long she'd been sitting there.
"Mom?" No reaction from Joyce. "Mom, it's dark out. Why don't we turn on a light now?" Still no response. "Are you going to cook dinner tonight?" Nothing.
Dawn sighed, and left her mother to her dark musings. She went back down to the kitchen and fixed a sandwich and a soda, and returned to her room to do homework and watch TV. She hoped her dad would come back from Spain soon. She didn't know how to handle her mother any more, and she didn't think she could keep pretending much longer that all was well. The constant vigilance and cover-up was exhausting. Sometimes she really hated her sister. If Buffy hadn't screwed up so badly, their family would be happy and whole.
Buffy had ruined everything.
xxxxxx
The morning of the twentieth shone bright and clear for the first time in a week. Buffy stretched and checked the clock. Nine. She felt absolutely decadent this morning, and felt right down to her toes how thoroughly wonderful it was to wake up to gentle sunshine instead of Katie's cries and the drip drip drip of rain...Katie!!
Panicked, Buffy leapt off her bed and dove for the crib. When she saw her daughter sleeping peacefully, alive and well, she let out a relieved sigh. God! I thought...
She'd thought Katie had...died. She'd never slept through before; Katie was as reliable as an alarm clock, and that clock was set firmly for 8 am.
This is a good thing. More sleep at a time is a good thing. She's alive. This is normal. This is a good thing...
Once Buffy got past her fear and was in a good place again, she decided to go grab some cereal while her time was her own for a minute. No telling when the Katie-clock would go off, this was new territory for her.
Speaking of food...what was that wonderful aroma? Could it be...?
Yep! Pancakes. Faith was at the stove making pancakes for breakfast. They smelled wonderful, but it was Tuesday. So how...?
This morning was turning into one big question mark.
"Hey! Mornin'!" Faith smiled as she slid one onto a stack of four already made. She handed the plate to Buffy and pushed her gently toward the table, where orange juice, syrup, and sausage was waiting. "I'm glad you're up. We need to eat these, and I didn't have the heart to actually wake you, so I was kinda torn there..."
"Wow. I can't believe you did all this," Buffy took in the table and then turned on Faith, "And how are you home this morning?"
"Ah, that was part of my fiendish plan. I worked on Sunday, to make up for today. Frank let me have today off so we could do your birthday up right."
"That's sooo sweet!"Buffy almost got in a hug but Faith deftly sidestepped and turned her toward her chair and bade her eat. Once Buffy was seated, Faith grabbed her stack and the two girls began to eat all the wonderful food.
Katie awoke about three-quarters way through the meal, and Buffy changed and nursed her before handing her off to Faith while she showered. When she came back in, Faith was dressed and so was Katie, both ready for an outing it seemed.
"What's going on?"
"This is your big day. Sixteen! And you are going to have your special day, starting with an appointment with a salon for a manicure, pedicure, and hair care, whatever you want. The appointment is for ten-thirty, so we've gotta get going."
Buffy was stunned. Seriously? Faith was doing this? "Oh my God, I don't know what to say!"
"Say thank you Auntie Faith, and let's motor!" Faith grabbed the diaper bag - already packed, Buffy noticed, and motioned for her to precede her out the door. Buffy didn't have to be asked twice.
xxxxxx
The salon treatment was heaven. The salon ladies fussed over Katie while Buffy and Faith got the works. At noon, they had lunch in a little cafe nearby, and then Faith told Buffy about the rest of her day.
"Now, let's see, it's almost one so it's a little early, but let's see if we can convince Miss Katharine to eat a little early today, so you can have some uninterrupted quality time this afternoon."
"Doing what?"
"You'll see." Faith was enjoying this. "First, feed Katie, then I'm taking you somewhere special."
Buffy couldn't imagine what Faith had in mind, but she obeyed. Where she wound up she could not believe. "Aphrodite's Spa," Buffy read the sign aloud. "What did you do?"
"Your appointment is for one-thirty. It's the full treatment, two and a half hours of wraps and facials and massages and saunas." Faith loved the look on her cousin's face.
"How? Why? How?" Buffy was just stunned.
"Because it's the one and only time you're gonna turn sixteen, and you deserve a day where it's all about pampering you for a change. You take good care of Katie and, frankly, of me too. Now it's time we took care of you."
Buffy felt tears well up, happy tears. She took care of Faith? No, it was the other way around. She couldn't believe her cousin was doing this for her.
"How can you afford all this? It's so much!"
"I've been saving a while for today. Don't worry about it. Just go, have fun. Katie and I will have a great afternoon together, won't we baby?" Faith turned to the baby in her car seat. Katie gurgled. "See? She agrees with me. Here is your reservation, and I'll be back for you at four."
Buffy just sat there staring at the spa.
"Go! Before I decide to hand Katie to you and go in myself."
"Oh no you don't!" Buffy laughed. "I'm all over this." She turned back to Faith. "Thank you."
"Ah ah ah! No crying or hugging. Just relaxing massage and wraps this afternoon. Out!"
"Yes ma'am." Buffy jumped out of Faith's car and started her afternoon of special pampering.
Today, she felt like a princess. It was good to be sixteen.
xxxxxxx
Home again at five, and Buffy was so relaxed she thought she might puddle through the floor to the apartment below. She laughed to herself. If Fred were home, what a surprise that would be!
Faith was taking her time unlocking the door, but nothing could annoy Buffy right now. Which was a good thing, because Fred had a surprise of her own on the other side.
When Buffy walked inside, she stopped dead in her tracks at the sight before her. Balloons and streamers and the coffee table full of presents. She caught the aroma of roast chicken from the kitchen. She was willing to bet there was birthday cake in there too.
"Omigod! You guys! This is amazing! I can't believe you did this!" she ran and hugged Fred tight. "And how are you here?! I thought you weren't coming back 'til tomorrow!"
"This is part two of our fiendish plan," Faith teased. "Fred was meant to come back late this afternoon, not tomorrow. We just told you tomorrow to throw you off the scent."
"Yeah, we were devious." Fred laughed.
"It worked." Buffy was close to tears. She couldn't believe how these two young women had just stepped in and worked to make her birthday so special. This was so unexpected.
"Dinner first, then presents, then cake!" Faith pronounced. "The official Summers family birthday rules must be followed to the letter."
Buffy laughed, but it brought to mind her mother, whose rules they were. She was so strict about her holiday traditions. She missed her mother, at least she missed the kind although rigid mother she used to know, not the unsmiling brittle one she left behind in November. She wondered what her mother was doing now, on her birthday. Did she even remember this day?
Duh! Of course she does, you idiot. Buffy knew that she would never forget the day of Katie's birth, no matter where Katie was in the world. She had to believe her own mother felt the same.
I'm so sorry, mom. But I had to, I had to save Katie, I had to make sure she wasn't given away to strangers. Buffy hoped one day her mom would understand and forgive her. Someday...
But today? Today there was cake and presents and the most aromatic chicken in the world just waiting on her to say the word.
"Let's eat!"
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After dinner, the girls sat around the living room and just talked and shared stories of their lives before they knew each other. It was such a peaceful, happy evening, no cares, no worries, no outside world to interfere and disturb the harmony of that moment.
Katie was trying to grab her feet while propped up in Fred's lap. "She looks like she's gonna be blonde," Fred remarked. "Was her daddy blonde too?"
Buffy looked thoughtfully at her daughter and considered how to respond to that question. "No, but I was blonde my first few years too, so she probably got that from me." Buffy had no idea if her father were blonde, but the answer sounded safe enough, and could cover for whatever it turned out Katie would be. Blonde? Huh.
Faith watched Buffy as she answered Fred's innocent question, and smiled softly at the way Buffy covered for her secret.
Buffy caught Faith's expression, and returned a sad smile of her own. Usually Buffy just completely dissociated her daughter from anything remotely father-like in her existence. When she thought about it at all, she almost thought of her like she was some test-tube baby, from some anonymous sperm bank. It hurt less that way, and she did so love her little girl. She didn't want to have to think about that night when she looked at her baby girl, she just wanted to sever the timeline in half -- Before Katie and After Katie. She was definitely AK right now. She didn't see any reason to think about BK ever again.
Usually, that worked. But every now and then, it was harder to pull off. Buffy was so determined to sever that connection, that she found herself not thinking about BK at all. When it did come up, at times like today, she wondered how long she'd be able to keep that particular wall from crumbling.
Well,
whatever happened or happens, tonight...for tonight...it's just us. A
beautiful happy birthday, no bad thoughts allowed.
Buffy
smiled and asked if anyone else wanted more cake.
Faith's eyes followed Buffy into the kitchen. Deep down inside, she was worried. Things had a way of catching up with you, and denial only worked so long. She wondered how long it would be before it all caught up with Buffy. Because there were few certainties in life, but she knew this for a fact: this was gonna catch up with her young cousin someday, no matter how hard she tried to avoid it.
And that was a sure bet.
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Authors Note: Things are progressing well, and Spike will be coming later, please don't worry about it. I'm a big Spike fan, and he's a big part of this story, once we get to him. Meanwhile, I appreciate you sticking with me here.
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Chapter
Twelve
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Lessons
Buffy gazed at the birthday presents spread out before her on the bed. Fred, a woman who hadn't even known her two months ago, had been so generous, so thoughtful. The cake and dinner would have been enough, more than enough. But this? This was above and beyond.
Before her lay two new pairs of straight leg Levis, one pair of flared Levis, two short sleeve and one halter blousy tops remade from good quality thrift store finds, and a beautiful black vintage dress re-worked and modernized just enough, with soft black folds of fabric and absolutely perfect lace touches. They were exactly right, in every detail, and looked beautiful on her. They were so well-made they could have come from a major fashion house, rather than the living room of a shy Texas woman in a old apartment in a little town in California. Fred's talents were clearly wasted on hemming garments for dry cleaning customers.
She
must've been working on these when I couldn't come down, when Gary
was home.
The dress and tops,
clearly fashioned with her sketches and clippings in mind, had little
buttons in their bodices, cleverly placed for easy breastfeeding.
They were all so cunningly made and with wonderful details. And the
jeans were perfectly sized and the lengths just right.
How
did she do this? How can they be so perfect?
Buffy
had worked hard to get her figure back on track these last two
months, and for the most part had succeeded in reaching her
pre-pregnancy weight and proportions. Her breasts were still larger
than usual, and her bottom was a little rounder, but she had no
intentions of complaining on that score. In fact, she rather hoped,
being young still and presumably still growing, that she wouldn't
lose the extra bust size when breastfeeding ended. Anyway, one could
live in hope.
The Tai Chi, along with regular exercises she did at home, seemed to be doing the trick. But her encounter with Zack the other day had her seriously spooked, and she was determined to learn how to defend herself in earnest. There was a kickboxing class starting up in a week, and she wanted to make sure she was in it. Fred had agreed to watch Katie for her during her classes twice a week, and she could use the library those days too. In return, Buffy would baby-sit Stevie for a day or an evening during an at-home week so she and Gary could have some quality couple time, perhaps go out on a 'date'.
Although Buffy had never loved school, lately she had been worried about her education. She knew that enrolling in high school was out of the question, but she thought she might be able to eventually get her GED and perhaps even go to college someday. But she couldn't do that with only a year and a half of high school education. That was why she decided to get a library card and start studying GED test subjects on her own, so that when she was finally old enough to stop worrying about being identified and returned home, she would be ready to take that test and move on with college right away, just like any other eighteen year old high school graduate could. She really didn't have much more than this intention worked out in her head, but she was determined to make her plan work somehow. She did not want to even think about raising her daughter having completed only a ninth grade education, and if she wanted to get on in the world as an adult, she'd need to prepare now. She would not even consider failure on that front. She'd been raised her whole life to assume she would attend college. Her life right now was just a bump in the road, and she fully believed she would eventually reach that destination.
But first, she had to absorb the knowledge. And that meant the library.
Meanwhile, there was a baby to feed and Fred downstairs, ready and willing to teach her how to make clothes that looked like this. She was absolutely determined that she would not only learn these skills, but that she'd learn them expertly. Making thrift store crap look like something from a fine boutique? That was a life skill she was not going to pass up learning, when a seamstress of this caliber was waiting to teach her, just one floor down.
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Kickboxing class at the rec center was more fun than she'd thought it would be. Where Tai Chi had a calming yet energizing effect, and routine exercises built strength but ultimately were boring, kickboxing really let her get her aggressions out in a socially acceptable way, and she loved it. Plus, hopefully, if it ever came down to it, she'd be able to defend herself from an attacker.
So far she had managed to avoid running into Zack again, although she did notice him sometimes watching her from the window in the bar as she entered or left the building. It gave her the creeps. She had no idea what strange thoughts he hid behind his grave expression, because as far as she could tell, there just wasn't any 'there' there.
"You're doing great for a beginner."
Buffy startled out of her thoughts and turned quickly to see the handsome young man standing behind her.
"Oh! Thanks," she smiled brilliantly at Ben, the hunky instructor of the kickboxing class. She liked him quite a bit, although she was in no hurry to find a boyfriend at this time in her life. She had way too much on her plate right now to handle a boyfriend as well. Perhaps later, when she was more settled in her life and Katie was older.
Meanwhile, she didn't mind some harmless flirting. Flirting was fun when you knew you didn't have to follow up with anything afterward. It was just an innocent diversion, and safe. More than anything Buffy was aware of an overwhelming need to be safe where men were concerned. Her limited experience with them so far was not reassuring, and she had no intention of allowing herself to become involved with anyone until she felt more secure and protected. She did not permit herself to remember the reasons for her fears, she just accepted her need for extreme caution and tried not to think too hard about it.
Silence.
This was always the hard part with Ben. He would come over and compliment something she did in class, and she would smile and say something appropriate back, and then they would stand awkwardly, neither knowing just what to do or say next. She wished he would give her more to work with here. In her former life, the boys she flirted with had had school in common with her, or a common link in living in New York. She had mutually familiar subjects to fall back upon for conversation. But here, in Sunnydale, she was lost. If she could just think of something new to say...
"Um...the class was very good today," she offered hopefully. "I liked the way you put that tall guy in his place when he was being too aggressive." There. That was a start.
"Yeah, he was a jerk." Ben nodded and folded his arms across his chest.
Silence.
"Yeah."
Brilliant conversation Buffy!
Why don't you just pick your nose and belch? Really
impress him.
"Yeah."
Ben looked at the ground, then around distractedly at the other
students packing up to go.
Silence.
"Well, I've gotta go now, I have some appointments to keep," Ben mumbled and started to move away.
"Okay, see ya," she called softly to his retreating back.
He turned around, smiled, and walked backward a moment, calling out, "Yeah, see you around," then turned back away from Buffy, and left the rec center.
Well, that was brilliant conversation Buffy. I'm sure he's gonna want to continue this talk later...Idiot! she chided herself as she packed up her gym bag and left the rec center.
She headed out for the Sunnydale City Library. There was book-larnin' to be done.
xxxxxxx
"I spoke to that woman I told you about today." Faith was changing for another date with Robin, as Buffy sat on the bed watching her.
"Woman...?" Buffy's eyebrows scrunched into a confused frown as she tried to remember what woman...
"The housecleaning lady?" No sign of recognition from Buffy. "So you could work? Remember?"
Ah! Yes. Work. She had repressed that particular fact about her new life. There would be actual work to get on with.
"Oh! Right. Housecleaning. I remember now," Buffy acknowledged. "What did she say?"
"She said she's willing to take you on, teach you how to do it. She said you'd have to work the same houses with her for a while, until you knew enough on your own. Then later she'd help you get some that were your own jobs to do."
"Teach me?" Buffy was puzzled. How hard can housecleaning be?
"Yeah, there's things you need to know about doing it right, so the clients will be happy with the job and want you back. It's a whole thing." Faith had moved on to make-up. "I wanna warn you. This lady, she's tough. She likes things to be 'just so', so she's gonna be real picky about how you do on these jobs." Faith looked at Buffy through the mirror. "If you want to work with her - and you're gonna need to make this work out - you'll hafta listen to what she says and do things her way."
Buffy nodded. Great. "I understand. And I will pay close attention and do what she says." Inside she groaned. This is the part of the grown-up world that I am not looking forward to. But hey! Money! Money is good.
"So...whadda ya think?" Faith stood and turned full circle. "Do I look hot and ready to dazzle?"
"You look beautiful," Buffy smiled at her cousin. It was Valentine's Day, and Robin was taking Faith to a really nice restaurant for dinner, then back to his place for...well, for the first time. Their first time. It was all so romantic.
"Yeah? You think so? He'll like?"
"He'll very like." Buffy looked at the clock. He'd be here any minute to pick her up.
knock knock knock
"There he is!" Faith turned back to Buffy. "Don't wait up!" she grinned.
"Go, have fun. And don't worry. This is gonna be a great evening. You look wonderful, and he's crazy about you. No worries."
Faith gave her a dazzling smile, and went to meet her guy for the big V-day date.
Someday, Buffy thought, she'd have such a date. Someday. But tonight - tonight she held Katie and ate ice cream in front of the TV.
"We'll just celebrate Valentine's together, won't we baby girl?"
Katie gurgled happily. This was all the love Buffy needed tonight. Baby love.
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Faith knew the strangest people.
The housecleaning lady standing before her was small, slim, attractive - and had long blue hair. And an accent of indeterminate origin. Russia? Ukraine? Albania? Somewhere cold and ancient.
"You will do," she pronounced with a decisive, imperious nod. Somewhere, apparently, with no sense of humor.
"Um, thanks?"
The lady didn't even blink. Ever, as far as Buffy could see. "Come. I will teach you."
Illyria. Even her name had a cold icy quality to it. And she reminded Buffy of someone.
"Get in," she directed Buffy to the car. "There is much to learn. You will pay attention and do exactly what I say when I say it." She looked at Buffy with cold expectancy.
"Do what you say when you say to do it. Gotcha." Buffy nodded as she buckled the car seat, complete with baby, into the back seat of Illyria's car.
Illyria had told her she could bring Katie with her to the jobs since she was unable to walk and get into any trouble in the client's houses. Buffy would need to deduct any time tending to Katie from the time billed to the client, but she thought that was only fair. They were paying her for housecleaning, not for breastfeeding her baby. Buffy didn't know yet what she would do when Katie started crawling, but for now this would work just fine.
Buffy wondered at the strange turnings her life was taking lately. She was actually being driven to an actual job working for a actual blue haired (Bulgarian?) woman with no sense of humor.
And she looked like someone Buffy knew. She thought it'd come to her eventually, but it was really bugging her.
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Buffy collapsed on her bed. She honestly didn't know tired came in so many layers. Muscles she didn't even know she had, ached miserably. Perhaps she'd been too optimistic about all these simultaneous projects, and this was life's way of telling her to slow down. No. No. She was young and smart and she could do anything she set her mind to do. She just had to get used to working and find a balance. Learning to sew, learning kickboxing, reading her library books, cleaning houses, and taking care of both Katie and the apartment - she could do them all, of course she could. Balance is all, she just needed to hit the right balance. This would all work out and she would be fine.
But first, a soak in the tub and some serious sleep. Or maybe just...some...sleep...
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Authors Note: Now, here's the deal. In California, a lot of municipal laws were recently passed regarding strip clubs and what may or may not happen within them. These more recent laws don't work in my story, so I've decided to completely ignore them and write the kinds of clubs you see on TV and in the movies, where it's a more libertine atmosphere. It's just less complicated that way. Hope you understand. Please don't get upset that I haven't got it right in the new legal reality as it might be in your own community, as it's intentional on my part.
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Chapter
Thirteen
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Haiku
Three Months Later
May 2004
There was something tacky and crude about a strip club during the daylight hours. Faith couldn't put her finger on it, because you'd think with no windows to reveal the time of day from the inside, the time of day wouldn't have any effect, but there was definitely something tawdry about the club during the daylight hours. The image of a cheap whore in the light of day sprang to mind.
She knew Robin would be here at this time, stocking the Monday deliveries, and doing the books for the weekend receipts. He didn't know she was coming, and she was nervous about it. She needed to talk to him, and she had no idea how he would react to her news.
He said he loved
me, it's gonna be okay, don't be nervous, be strong, don't be
nervous, be strong, don't be nervous...
Faith
usually found that when you had to talk yourself into something with
such determination, that it was usually the wrong thing to be doing.
But it was too late now, she was committed to this plan and hadn't
come up with any realistic alternatives to avoid this conversation.
Don't be nervous...
"Hey!" Robin walked into the room and spotted Faith immediately. "To what do I owe this very welcome interruption to my otherwise dreary day?" He strode up and gave her a big hug, and then took her elbow and walked her over to a nearby table. The club was closed on Mondays, so no one else was around to overhear their conversation.
Be strong...
"Um, well, I..." she trailed off and stared down at her hands, which were nervously playing with the hem of her jacket.
Robin frowned in concern. It wasn't like Faith to be so nervous, especially around him. "Hey, what's wrong? Are you okay?" He reached across the table for her hand.
"Yes...no...sort of...I don't know," Faith fumbled. "This was a stupid idea." She rose from her chair but Robin held fast to her hand.
"Hey," he gentled, "Whatever it is, you can talk to me. What's wrong?"
He was so sweet to her, so good. How would he feel when she
told him what she wanted? Stop it
Faith. Just get it out there. He said he loves you. He can help. He
will help.
"Faith, sit
down." Robin said with quiet authority. He wanted her to relax
and tell him what was wrong, and that wasn't going to happen unless
she got control of herself and told him. He was becoming alarmed by
her demeanor. What had his Faith so flighty and scared?
"Okay," Faith sat again. Here goes. "The thing is, and I wouldn't ask you if I thought I had any other options, but...I don't and...the thing is..." she looked up into Robin's concerned eyes and decided to just spit it out. "Frank fired me three weeks ago."
Robin leaned forward and took her other hand in his. "I'm so sorry, baby. I know you didn't like working for him, but I know that job was important to you. I don't understand why you didn't say something sooner. Three weeks ago?"
She nodded and looked deeply into his eyes. "Yeah, it pretty much screwed everything up. He said I made too many mistakes in the ordering, and I tried I really did but I just hated that job so much, and..." she trailed off and looked away. "Anyway, the rent's a week and a half late now, and Buffy, she don't earn enough to pay for it, for much of anything really, except for food and stuff for her and Katie, and she's just a kid and I can't ask her to support me, you know, even if she could, which she can't, and Frank badmouthed me to a lot of shop managers so no one will hire me now, and anyone who calls for a reference, he just says all these bad things about --"
"Faith. Stop. It's okay."
"Really?"
"Yeah. Of course."
Robin smiled at her and she felt such a sense of relief. Robin could help them, she should have just trusted him in the first place.
"That..that's great. Thank you." Faith smiled at him with her whole heart. "And you know, I'm good for it, I will absolutely pay you back."
Robin leaned back and looked at Faith a long moment. "You misunderstand me. I'm not lending you money."
Faith's smile froze as she tried to take in this unexpected turn. "I guess I don't understand..."
"I can get you work. You don't have to work for peanuts at any auto shop."
"What do you mean?" she tentatively asked.
"I'll give you a job."
"Here?" She flicked her gaze around the room as his words sank in. "I'm not even nineteen for another month, so I can't tend bar or anything, so I don't know..."
"No, not at the bar. But you've got the beauty and the moves to do well as a dancer, Faith. In fact, you'd be great." Robin smiled gently at her, but he was still leaning back in his chair, and she couldn't help but notice he hadn't taken her hand again.
"A dancer?" She looked down at her hands fidgeting with the hem of her jacket again.
"Absolutely. You'd be fantastic, I've always thought so," he nodded.
Faith was floored. She hadn't expected this kind of help, but it was the only offer she had right now and Mr. Kralik was not going to hold out another week on the rent. She needed the money, and she needed to get it fast. She just couldn't believe Robin was asking her to be a dancer in this club. It kinda shot the hell outta exclusivity in her opinion.
She looked up into Robin's eyes again, and saw there a shrewd calculation, sure, but also the same man who declared his love for her almost daily. She couldn't believe she was gonna do this, but she was gonna trust him. If he said this was something he thought she could do, then she could do it. He didn't seem disturbed by it that's for sure. And he'd often said the money the girls made was pretty good. And it wasn't forever, it was just until she found something better. Right?
"Okay, if you think I'd be any good at it. It's just another job, right?" she sounded so young, so uncertain, to her own ears.
Robin leaned in again and took both her hands in his. "You'll be great," he said gently. "It's a job, like any job. Except you'll earn a lot more money doing this and work half as hard. And the rent and food and clothes, whatever you need...no more problems. You get taken care of and we get the prettiest girl in Sunnydale to grace our fine establishment. It's a win-win." Then he smiled that smile that always turned her to goo.
And she knew she was going to do this, and that it would be just fine. She'd be okay. She thought, though, that she might not mention it to Buffy for awhile, at least not until she got used to it herself. What Buffy didn't know couldn't hurt her. Right?
Faith graced Robin with an optimistic smile. "So. What do I do first?"
xxxxxx
While Faith was in San Martine making some hard decisions about where her life would take her next, Buffy was in Sunnydale enjoying her afternoon. She'd taken the bus to the library this morning to check out some books on world history, and passed by a coffee bar that had piqued her interest on earlier trips through the nicer parts of Sunnydale. The Espresso Pump. It called out to her every time the bus drove past, but she had never gotten off and explored it further.
But on that afternoon, after rebelliously checking out books on the history of fashion design - instead of world history as her 'life plan' required - she decided to splurge a little on herself and stop in and get a latte and a chocolate chip croissant. She felt very naughty while doing both, as neither were part of the budget or the 'life plan' she'd laid out for herself, but it was a beautiful day and she felt young and carefree and wanted the feeling to last a little while longer, even if it meant scrimping a bit later on. Katie was safe with Fred this afternoon, and for just a short time she wanted to be a sixteen year old girl whose worries were more along the lines of which boy to allow to take her to the dance than wondering if that new detergent was any better at getting baby vomit out of a silk blouse than the current brand had proven to be.
Sitting down at a small table situated next to the front windows of the establishment, she settled in to read one of her new books while she slowly picked at her croissant and tried to make the afternoon slow down. She was in absolutely no hurry to catch the bus back across town today.
While Buffy occupied herself with the history of Western fashion, a few high school students wandered into the Espresso Pump after school had let out for the day. A couple sat down near Buffy, and although she tried to be polite and concentrate on her own reading, their conversation caught her attention and she found herself listening in on their discussion. Apparently, a member of their group - not present - had found himself publicly cuckolded and the subject of intense interest and sympathy.
"Did you see him in World Lit today?" The redheaded girl scrunched her eyebrows in an expression of pained sympathy. "It was so sad."
The tall brunette boy nodded wisely. "I think pathetic is more like it. He's wearing his heart on his sleeve -- the better to get it stomped on and wrung out like a... bloody... spongy... heart... on a... sleeve... Okay, that analogy could use some punching up," he shrugged.
Little Red-haired Girl grimaced but nodded just the same. "Not liking that visual, but yeah, he's really not taking this well." She sipped her coffee.
Brunette Boy shook his head sympathetically. "Fifteen haiku on the heartbreak of young love. It was brutal."
"Drusilla was his world,"Little Red-haired Girl sadly noted.
Buffy frowned.
Drusilla? What kind of a weird ass name is Drusilla?
"I
especially liked the one where he compared the hopelessness of young
love to the mating ritual of the praying mantis. They have sex - she
devours him alive. Very moving." Brunette Boy pondered
thoughtfully.
Little Red-haired Girl nodded, "I thought the sucking quicksand one was very good."
Don't laugh...don't laugh...don't laugh... Buffy knew she couldn't react or they'd know she was listening. But it was hard.
Brunette boy shook his head and sighed, then offered his take on the bitter breakup. "He's better off without the Looney Tunes. He needs to find a nice normal girl who won't consider going down on half the band a little harmless 'exploration of boundaries'." Brunette Boy sighed wistfully, "I wish I was in a band."
"Okay, that's a little more than I want to know about your fantasy life," Little Red-haired Girl declared. She took a quick long sip of her coffee and turned several shades of red.
"Sorry. Teenage boy here. Hormones and kinky fantasies are kinda a package deal," he explained. "The heart wants what it wants." He waxed philosophical.
"The heart?" Little Red-haired Girl asked doubtfully.
"Well, okay. The hormones want what they want. There probably isn't a lot of 'heart' involved in that particular fantasy." He grinned goofily.
Little Red-haired Girl gave her friend a mock-glare, then gathered her book bag and got up to leave. Brunette Boy followed closely behind her as they exited the bar.
Fifteen
haiku on the hopelessness of young love...I'd love to hear that
someday.
Buffy went back to
her book, finished her croissant and nursed her latte as she tried to
stretch the afternoon a little while longer. She found herself
longing to have high school friends again, friends like those she
listened in on today.
That
part of my life is over, so get
over it, Buffy.
She looked at
her watch. Time to catch that damn bus. Back to real life again. Her
life. Her drearily adult life.
I
wonder what kind of haiku someone would write about me.
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Author's Note: The paths are crossing but not yet convergent. Please be patient while the story unfolds as it must. Your patience will be rewarded.
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Chapter
Fourteen
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Scars
Mother's Day
It was a Summers Mother's Day family tradition. First thing Sunday morning, the girls would make breakfast in bed for their mother, who would feign surprise at the treat and dutifully eat whatever was placed before her with cheerful good grace. Even if it were technically inedible, the result was always the same: praise and gratitude for a thoughtful loving gesture from her two girls, and a silent promise to herself that soon she must teach her daughters how to cook.
And so it was that on this Sunday morning, fourteen year old Dawn Summers single-handedly continued the tradition by awakening her mother and attempting to place a tray of Mother's Day breakfast treats before her. Unfortunately, this year, Joyce was not up to the game.
"Go away!" came the muffled moan from beneath the covers.
"Mom! It's Mother's Day. Time to get up." Dawn gently coaxed.
Inarticulate mutterings drifted up out of the comforter, and Joyce attempted to sit up and see what on earth Dawn was going on about. "Wha...Dawn, do you know how early it is?" Joyce mumbled tiredly.
"It's not early. It's nine." Dawn patiently explained, holding the heavy tray before her.
"I'm not in the mood for this...today...take it away..." Joyce muttered dismissively as she laid back down and pulled the covers up again, trying to block out both sun and food.
"But it's Mother's Day..." Dawn trailed off. She couldn't believe her mother was doing this to her, on today of all days. "It's tradition."
Joyce was in no mood. "Dawn, I said go away" she snarled and put the pillow over her head to block out the day and her daughter.
Dawn stood there with her tray in her hands, feeling very hurt and also very stupid. Obviously, the only daughter Joyce wanted to hear from wasn't there today. Dawn felt stupid for even trying to keep the family traditions alive.
She felt soft tears wet her face as she took the tray of food back to the kitchen and left it on the table, untouched. She wasn't sure what to do now. She began to cry harder.
Looking at the phone on the kitchen wall, she decided she was going to call her dad and tell him what was going on here, beg him to come home. And then she was going to have herself a good cry and go to the mall to buy some new bikinis for summer.
Dawn Summers was more than hurt. She was angry. And she had had enough.
xxx
When she called her dad's cell phone she was surprised to find that he was actually in town for Mother's Day, driving in from the airport even as they spoke. Hank had also made some decisions, and he'd had enough, too. He reassured Dawn that he would take care of everything and to go ahead and go out and leave her mother to him. He was back.
For the first time in months Dawn felt some cautious optimism about the home front. Daddy was coming back. Daddy would take care of her, even if her mother no longer cared to.
xxx
When Hank came home that morning, he roughly awakened his wife and poured coffee into her with ruthless determination. He'd had some months of soul-searching while traveling around the globe. The surface story was that he was working all those months, but in reality he used his work as an escape from a family he could no longer bear to be near for any length of time. He didn't know the deeper reasons as to how or why his family was so shattered, but he did know that the immediate catalyst was his eldest daughter. Buffy. There may have been problems bubbling underneath the surface, and certainly he had to bear his share of the blame, but it was Buffy who had inadvertently ripped the lid off and shown them all what really lay below. And now she was gone and those left behind were also left staring at the remains of their happy home, now just a hollow shell of the family they had appeared to be.
And so he had finally made some decisions. He was not going to throw away his marriage or shirk his family responsibilities any longer. The family was falling apart and he wasn't going to let that continue any further. He was going to shape up, and he was going to make damn sure that Joyce did too.
That Sunday in May, Joyce and Hank had a long, emotionally draining confrontation about where they'd been and where they wanted to be. Joyce agreed to allow Hank to pour out all of the liquor, and would enter a program for alcoholics. Her behavior toward Dawn this last year and especially on that morning was starkly laid out before her; it was an eye-opener for Joyce, and she was deeply ashamed of herself. She wanted more than anything to save her marriage and be a good mother to the one daughter she still had left.
So Hank and Joyce made plans that day. Plans to save their marriage, their home, and their daughter. Buffy was lost to them, they could do nothing to save her any longer, even if they knew where she was now. But Dawn was still there, crying out for love and attention, and by God they were going to do right by their youngest girl. They would pull the Summers family together, happy and whole: Joyce, Hank, and Dawn. Buffy had made her decisions, and now they would make theirs, as a family: mourning for Buffy and what could have been was done. It was time for the Summers family to move on.
xxxxxxxxxx
Three thousand miles away, that same daughter found herself in a very subdued mood for her first Mother's Day. She missed her own mother, and was still getting used to the idea that now she was a mother, too. There was a surreal quality to the entire day, and a restless discontent that she couldn't quite put her finger on.
Faith had Sunday off, and had made Buffy breakfast that morning as a special treat. Then she left to spend some quality time with Robin before the club opened for the day. Faith had just recently told her that she had quit her job at the auto shop to become a waitress in Robin's club. Buffy wasn't happy about that, but felt that it was Faith's life and surely she knew what she was doing. She couldn't imagine, herself, working as a waitress in such a club, but she and Faith didn't think along the same lines on that subject. And the tips Faith brought home now were very good. At least there was that.
Live and let live. Buffy was trying to live that philosophy where Faith was concerned. It was hard sometimes.
Fred had stopped by with a present that confused Buffy initially. Dr. Spock's Baby and Child Care. Buffy sincerely thanked Fred for the book, while inwardly wondering what kind of baby advice a Vulcan TV character could offer a new mother. Once Fred understood her confusion, she broke down in helpless giggles, then quickly explained that Dr. Spock and Mr. Spock were two entirely different people. Apparently this Dr. Spock guy knew a lot about raising kids. Fred swore by him, and Buffy felt that was good enough for her. It'd have to be; Buffy noticed that it was a very thick book.
xxxx
When Faith returned home late in the afternoon, Buffy left Katie in her hands and took the bus to the beach to sit and think and watch the sun set. She really needed some alone time to get her thoughts together, and to hopefully find some peace for her troubled heart. She was surprised that the holiday had caught her so off guard, and wondered at the reason for it. It was a melancholy that Buffy did not often permit herself to experience, so when it came suddenly upon her, she was shaken by it all the more.
She found a comfortable place on the rock jetty jutting out into the ocean. She silently watched as the sky became imbued with soft reds and purples, and the evening star made it's first appearance. It was a lovely sunset, the end of a melancholy yet peaceful day. When the sky had turned full dark, Buffy rose and made her way back to the bus stop and home.
xxxxxx
On the pier that day, at the same moment that Buffy was seeking for quiet peace within the beauty of nature, another sixteen year old stood at the end of the fishing pier smoking a cigarette and drinking straight from a bottle of Jack Daniels secreted beneath his coat. He hated Mother's Day as a general rule; hated being reminded that his own mother was in England getting on with her new husband and her new life, a life that did not include him any longer. He had been sent to his uncle in Sunnydale when his parents divorced two years previously; his mother's new husband having no use for a teenage boy in his life, and his father understanding clearly that he was in no position to raise his son without changing his own libertine and chaotic lifestyle. So at the age of fourteen he was sent packing to his uncle's family in America; a sensitive child made more so by the turn his family life had taken and the sudden uprootedness of his existence.
His uncle was a good man, as was his wife a kind and patient woman, and they both loved the boy dearly. But the hurt and the anger ran deep, and the boy didn't exactly adjust easily into a California lifestyle. So the boy decided that the sensitive child he had been needed to toughen up and he adopted a swagger and a style that reflected this new persona, although the sensitive poet within him remained untouched.
This outward change had the added benefit of attracting good male friends and also proving quite attractive to the opposite sex. And his first girlfriend turned out to have been his first great love. She showed him a side of life, love, and sex that until then he had only dreamed about; she was his dark goddess, and he worshipped at her altar.
That his great love turned out to have been a little crazy, and ultimately cheated on him with half the members of the house band at a local club, cut him to the core. He was a romantic idealist at heart, and he had naively assumed that their love would last a lifetime, pure and unpolluted by the outside world. That it had lasted only a little more than a year was a truth he found devastating. For the second time, a woman had hurt him beyond the telling of it. But it was easier to be angry than to be in pain, less hurtful to cause suffering than to experience it.
Thus it was that the boy put his romantic idealism away, and became the sort of man he had previously only viewed with contempt. Women were not to be trusted. Women had trampled his love underfoot; his heart he had freely given but in return received only ridicule and pain. He had learned the lesson well, and he would turn it around on his tormenters, these girls and women. He would no longer give his heart to the opposite sex. He would pursue them, seduce them, and use them without remorse.
His carefully crafted tough persona had now reached inside and he had become that man in truth. From now on, he was the Big Bad. No woman would get close enough to hurt him ever again.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Authors Note: I am utilizing the characters which already exist in the Buffyverse to as great a degree as I can. I am trying to keep those characters as close to their original characterization and relationships as I can, but I am somewhat limited by the story I am trying to tell. I have to fit them in there and this means that sometimes a character is used in a position for one purpose but must take on other characteristics that are not part of the Buffyverse or may not be as pleasant as one would like them to be, but the story requires that particular attitude or behavior be seen in the same character. No negative stereotyping is intended within this story. Each character is his/her own person, for good or bad, as the story requires it. I am completely opposed to character bashing in fanfiction, and to stereotyping in general. And this is not in reference to Spike, who is a complex combination of bad and good all on his own, so please don't panic anybody. I love Spike too. :-)
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Chapter
Fifteen
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
The Devil's In The Details
One Week Later
It was eight o'clock on a Thursday morning in May, and Buffy sat in her kitchen feeding Katie her cereal and pears. As usual, more of the food wound up on the high chair, on the floor, and on Katie than actually made it inside of her daughter. She couldn't believe she thought this, but she actually liked changing her little girl more than feeding her. Changing was so much more predictable. And nothing beat the belly raspberries that she blew on her tummy and the baby giggles that followed at the end of the process. Feeding, however, was all about waiting for the baby to look her way and cooperate by opening her mouth, and then cleaning up an ever expanding mess afterwards. Nope, no contest
I'm
probably going to wind up with very clean skinny children.
She
was just about to wipe up all the mess, when she was startled by Fred
rushing excitedly into the apartment waving the morning edition of
the local newspaper in front of her.
"You have to read this!" Fred shoved the paper before Buffy's face and pointed to an editorial above the fold on page three.
"A
Serial Killer in our Midst? Since
March 25th, five young women have The similarities between the five homicides
Authorities Hiding the Truth!
been brutally raped, tortured,
and mutilated,
their bodies left near the side of the roads
on
the hillsides along the Central Coast
between Sunnydale and Santa
Cruz.
clearly
indicate that a serial killer is walking
among us. All five women
were sexually
mutilated in the same sadistic manner..."
Buffy quickly read the newspaper article that Fred had placed before her this morning. Apparently the authorities had been downplaying the five murders in order to avoid alarming the residents, the college students, their parents, and the tourists that were expected to boost the local economy during the summer months. The local press felt the authorities were stonewalling the investigation and the media, and were taking them to task for it.
"Oh, God," Buffy's heart sank as she wiped some pureed pears off the paper and passed it back to Fred. Could it be...? "Do you think it's..." She really didn't want to finish that sentence.
"Zack?" Fred said reluctantly. "Could be. He is very...strange...and he has been watching you pretty much all the time since that day in the laundry room..." she trailed off.
Buffy had told Fred about her encounter with Zack that rainy day in January, and both girls had kept a close eye on him ever since. But not in their wildest dreams did they think he might be considered dangerous to this level and degree. A serial rapist-killer...that was a whole new worry to consider.
"What should we do?" Buffy asked unhappily. She didn't want to call attention to herself with the authorities, and they had no proof that the landlord's odd son had done anything wrong, but still...what if it were Zack that committed these crimes? How could she live with herself knowing she suspected and said nothing?
"Well, I think we should tip the police that he's here and acting strangely. Let them decide whether there's anything there or not." Fred put forward. "We have to let them know so they can stop him, if it is him."
Nodding, Buffy turned away and started cleaning up Katie and the tray. She had never fessed up to Fred about her real age and reasons for being in Sunnydale. How could she explain her reluctance to get involved with the authorities? For all she knew, there was a missing persons bulletin out there on her and Katie, perhaps even a warrant for her arrest for taking Katie the way she did. She really had no idea what her parents might have done when they found them gone. She remembered all too clearly the threats her mother had made at the time, however.
Fred noticed that Buffy was reluctant to get involved, even though Zack clearly frightened her. She watched her clean up after Katie's breakfast and then sat down with her for a cup of morning tea. She needed to let Buffy know she knew something was wrong there, had for awhile now.
"Sweetie, I know you're carryin' a secret you don't want anyone to know," she started carefully.
Buffy tensed immediately and began to deny anything of the sort but Fred put her hand on her arm and stopped her before she got started.
"It's okay. Whatever it is, I'm not going to tell anyone, your secret is safe with me." Fred smiled reassuringly and hoped Buffy wouldn't become defensive and refuse to admit the truth.
Buffy had thought that hearing those words out of Fred's mouth would be terrifying and was astonished that the feeling they evoked was closer to relief. After holding her breath for about five seconds, she suddenly burst into tears. Fred enveloped her in her arms immediately, and rocked her until she could get control again.
"Shhh...there...it's all right...it's gonna be alright..." Fred cooed softly into Buffy's hair as she held the weeping girl. "No one's gotta know anything you don't want 'em to...your secret is safe with me...it's gonna be alright..." Over and over Fred soothed the poor girl, stroking her hair softly until Buffy could regain her composure again.
"I'm so sorry...so sorry...I...I...I lied to you..." Buffy shook her head back and forth while pleading with Fred to understand. "I'm so sorry..."
"It's okay, sweetie, I kinda suspected you weren't completely truthful when we first met. It's not my business if you don't wanna tell me what's got you so worried." Fred brushed some hair behind Buffy's ear and handed her some tissue to wipe her eyes. "You don't have to tell me, it's okay, sweetie."
But that's exactly what Buffy did that morning; she told Fred everything - leaving out the rape, as she just was not willing to trust anyone else with that yet. Fred just smiled patiently and gave no indication she was startled or concerned about the things Buffy told her that morning. She was surprised by how really young Buffy actually was, but a lot of time had passed since that first meeting, and Fred believed that the girl before her had earned the right to her life and her independence in the months she'd known her. Buffy was a resourceful, caring mother and Fred thought that if she felt she needed to run away and live with Faith in order to keep her daughter with her, that she would support her in that effort and keep her secret safe for her. And that's exactly what she told her, prompting Buffy to launch herself into Fred's arms for a fierce hug and grateful babbling thanks.
Fred loved this girl, she really did.
Meanwhile, there was Zack to deal with. They decided that Fred would make the tip, anonymously, and let the police deal with Zack without Buffy's involvement in any way. And if the police cleared him, then they'd both sleep better knowing they'd done what they could and that Zack was not the killer that was being sought.
xxxxx
At the police tip line - set up after the third murder victim had been found - the officer took down the information regarding the suspicious tenant that the anonymous caller reported to him. When he hung up the phone, he placed the information on the stack of other tips and leads that came through the line, an ever growing pile of information which had grown even taller once the newspaper editorial hit the stands the previous day. Everyone in the area had a weird relative or knew someone that acted hinky, and was only too happy to make sure the police checked them out.
At this rate, the young officer thought glumly, it'd be 2009 before they were able to track down all these leads. The phone rang again, and he started a new report.
"Yes, sir...your father-in-law, you don't say...what exactly did he do last Tuesday?... I see... yes, sir... yes, sir... a chicken... yes, sir, I got that... you don't say... yes, sir, that is strange... yes, sir..."
It was gonna be a long day.
xxxxxxxxxx
Lorne Krevlornswath was usually a happy man.
He was tall, athletic, blessed with a wonderful sense of style if he did say so himself, had a fantastic singing voice, a priceless sense of humor, and the ability to size people up within moments of meeting them. He was a good-natured man, and loved people in general. And he thought he lived a good life.
He was known to his co-workers and patrons as 'The Host', and his job was to act as emcee, DJ, and general manager of the girls who danced at The Paradise Club in San Martine, California.
San Martine was a small town situated a good thirty minute drive north and inland from the beach community of Sunnydale. It didn't have a lot going for it in terms of business or tax base, so the town government found they could not resist one area of municipal wealth that they could cash in on to keep the coffers filled. And that area was adult entertainment. While most cities and counties in the state had enacted new laws which strictly limited the boundaries of the adult entertainment industry, San Martine had taken advantage of the rather large customer base that was forced to seek their entertainment in less restrictive environments. San Martine had no intention of enacting any new ordinances regarding it's adult clubs, and therefore had a powerful draw to the owners of such businesses and their all-too-willing customers. A strip club in San Martine was an old-fashioned strip joint in every sense of the word, and no fussy town council was chomping at the bit to limit their lawful activities now that such laws had become popular in other communities. The town council of San Martine saw dollars in the bank, and were not particular as to how that money came into the city. There were more strip clubs and adult theaters in the town than churches or schools. And Mayor Wilkins liked it that way.
Lorne was a free-spirited man whose motto in life had always been live and let live. He saw his work in the club as protecting civil liberties for society as a whole, while making a good living for himself and his employers. At the same time he also saw himself as protector of the girls themselves, shielding them as much as he could from predatory customers who tried to get too up close and personal with their favorite dancers. He was big brother and father confessor all rolled into one, and the girls who were not too cynical to care any longer truly liked and some might say even loved him.
But it was his empathy for the trials and tribulations of his fellow man that sometimes made it difficult for him to truly enjoy his profession. Some of the girls who came to dance in clubs such as this came from hard lives and with little hope of a better future. He knew that there were a substantial number of women who danced who did not come to the profession out of hopelessness, drug addiction, or emotional damage, for whom dancing was a conscious and free decision made with a healthy sense of self-esteem, but too many he saw pass through these clubs in San Martine tended to be of the damaged variety, and he sometimes almost literally felt their pain. He was feeling some of that pain right now.
The main bartender and general manager, Robin, had mentioned that his girlfriend was interested in becoming a dancer in the club. Lorne spoke often to Robin, in fact they were friends, and knew that although he could be a hard ass he did truly seem to care deeply about this girl - Faith, her name was - and did not believe he was actually exploiting her situation to further his own ends. But he also could tell immediately that Faith was not exactly thrilled with the career choice she was committing to at this very moment. It was not his place to interfere, however, and so he gave her the tour and the rules just as he would any new dancer they were hiring on at The Paradise Club.
"Okay, honey, pay attention and I'll give you the ten-dollar tour," he smiled and waved a hand around the club. "In the front here is the 'floor', and that's where the bar, the tables, and the stage are. When you're not dancing a set you should be working the floor for private dances, that's where the money is." He continued on, "To the front left of the floor, back here, is the private booth area, and this is where the private dances are done."
They entered the area, and as Faith looked around curiously, Lorne described how the private dances worked.
"Never go into the private dance area with a customer until the song that was on before completely ends or you'll have it charged to you as a full dance," he cautioned. They went behind the curtain of a 'booth', a little room with a vinyl sofa and a little carpeted wooden box, about two feet square. "The private dances are sixty dollars each, and get paid up front. If a customer leaves without paying you, you'll still owe the club it's cut." Lorne pointed out the carpeted box to Faith. "Before you can start your dance you have to step up on this box and start from there. By law we're a theater, and nude dances must start from a stage." He pointed to the box. "This is your stage."
Faith took in the little carpeted stool-stage, and would have laughed if she wasn't so depressed and scared by the entire prospect of actually 'performing' for a living there. Her stage. Holy Mother of --
Lorne went on to tell her what a customer could and could not touch or do during a dance, and what the dancer could and could not do also. "Remember your rotation, get through your private dances but also listen for your rotation because you must perform your set when it's your turn. No exceptions. But do try to get the customer to sit through more than a couple of dances. Remember, that's--"
"--where the money is. Gotcha."
Lorne stopped and considered the
girl before him. She was such a mixture of innocent lamb and
worldly-wise street kid that he found himself completely charmed by
her. That's what Robin sees in
her...that and she's a knockout.
"When
you finish the private dance, leave the booth right away so some
other dancer can use it. Then get dressed to the side here before you
go out onto the floor. You can't go onto the floor nude." She
nodded, and he went on, "You can settle up your private dances
as you go or at the end of the night, but babycakes it will make the
end of the night go a lot smoother if you settle as you go." He
gave her a wide smile. "No one leaves until everyone has settled
up and I escort you to the parking lot, so the faster that goes the
sooner we all can go home and soak our doggies."
Faith looked at him blankly.
"Feet."
Faith nodded, "Oh, right...feet...and settle up as I go."
Lorne nodded, and watched her look around the tacky booth a moment, then started up the tour again, "On to the dressing room..."
xxx
Faith began dancing that night, hesitantly at first, and then with more confidence as the night wore on. Robin had given her some tips on how to sell a performance also, and she decided that if the law said this was theater, then she was going to be a damn fine actress. She decided that she wasn't really a stripper - she just played one. It made it easier to get into the spirit of the thing. One thing Robin mentioned to her also helped - think of the set as an ad for the private dances she would try to sell between sets.
Because that's where the money was.
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I NEVER do this, because I don't believe in telescoping my plots, but just so no one panics out there, let me reassure you that Spike is not the killer in spite of his bitter new attitude, and yes he is going to be more a part of this story soon so please stick around. And don't expect me to tell you anything in advance like that again, except in very rare instances. I'm evil that way. :-)
Also, some of the tour of the club Lorne gives Faith was completely based upon an article I read recently regarding the first night as a stripper of a girl in Orange County, California. The article is a first-person narrative called Private Dancer, by Elan. I didn't use much of it for the story, but it was a fascinating article and the details were irresistible, especially since my knowledge of the actual workings of such a club is zero.
Sara
