So, it turns out I'm a little bit of a liar. This isn't the last part. There will be one more after this. We all know by now how much I love to ramble on and how much trouble I have cutting down on details and when it came time to try and chop parts of Angela and Georgia's conversation, well...as I said, I am a detail addict. This chapter is entirely Angela and Georgia. The next one will have conversations between Angela/Eric and finally, Eric and Georgia. It should be up by Tuesday/Wednesday (my weekend).
Thanks for reading! And for your feedback, endless patience, and continued well-wishes! (I'm doing so much better, thank you.) :-)
"...and the headlights from the oncoming traffic were so bright. I tried to brake, but my heel got stuck under the pedal. I couldn't."
Angela closed her eyes and tried not to picture the scene described to her. It wasn't working. She held Georgia tighter. "That's why we don't drive with our heels on. Why do you think I keep flats in the car?"
"I never noticed before. Trust me, I know now. Anyway, it was either hit the car in front of me or swerve and go off the road. I didn't want to hit another person."
"Do you have any idea how lucky you are? You could've very easily hit another car and hurt an innocent person. You could've hurt one of your friends. Georgia, you could've hurt yourself. And that is me being optimistic."
"I know, mom! I know. You don't have to keep pointing out how lucky I was."
Though her daughter tried to pull away, she was reluctant to loosen her grip. "This could've ended so badly for you. That phone call I got tonight- that ranks up there with the most dreaded for parents. So, no, you don't get to tell me how I react."
Georgia wiggled out of her mother's grasp and got out of bed. "So what, I make one mistake- a big mistake- but one mistake and I'm never going to be able to live it down? You're going to rub my nose in it forever?"
She sighed. Any hope of rational conversation would be lost if they started yelling. "No, not forever. Like I said earlier, whether you can believe it or not I do know exactly how you feel. I've been a teenager and did something stupid with a car over a boy I was dating."
She sat back down on the bed. "What did you do?"
"Well, I had been going out with this guy named Colin for a few weeks and we… well…we got very close very quickly, and-"
"What does that mean? Sex?"
Angela hesitated for a few seconds before answering. "Yes." Now was not the time to shut down the lines of open communication. "He was the first guy I ever slept with."
"How old were you?"
"I was your age, a few months younger actually."
"Oh."
"I was bored, curious, young, and naïve enough to think that Colin really liked me. Two weeks later I caught him with a girl who was supposed to be my friend. Apparently he liked her just as much as me." Angela stared at her hands and twisted her wedding band around her finger. Even though the thing with Colin happened almost thirty years ago, it was still one of the more humiliating moments of her life and helped shape how she handled romantic relationships for a long time afterward. "I was devastated. He was the first guy I ever cared about. I thought I could trust him and it blew up in my face."
"I'm sorry, mom. Colin and that so-called friend sound like assholes that deserved each other. I hope they were miserable together."
"Watch your language, but thank you."
"So then what happened?"
"I handled it with all the grace and maturity you'd expect from a fifteen year old who was in way over her head and not as grown up as she thought she was."
Georgia recognized a dig when she heard one, but wanted to know the rest of the story. "How does a car fit into all this?"
"This friend was the "bad girl" of my small group and I thought maybe that's what Colin wanted- a bad girl. I got this stupid idea in my head that if I showed him I could be bad, too, he'd want me back."
She couldn't imagine her mother so lacking in self-confidence that she'd try to change her personality for a guy. Her mom was the most secure person she knew. "That's so stupid. No offense, mom, but-"
"No, you're right. It was stupid, the most stupid thing I've ever done."
"Stop keeping me in suspense and just tell me!"
"My friend Keisha and I borrowed the jeep that belonged to a lieutenant general and decided to drive it across the base in the middle of the night past Colin's house and-."
"You stole an army jeep?!"
"Borrowed, we borrowed it."
"The same way I just borrowed dad's car?"
"At first the plan was to drive it past his house and show him, really impress him. But on the way there I started talking to Keisha about why I was doing this and I got all worked up and upset again. By the time we made it across the base my plan changed."
"You're sounding very cryptic, mom."
"Colin had this bike, this beautiful dirt bike that he loved. He'd found it in a junkyard and restored it himself so he was very proud of it. That's why it was so surprising to see it laying in the driveway that night. He never left it out. All of a sudden I had a new target for my rage."
"Mom?"
"I wanted to hurt him like he hurt me and I knew destroying his bike would accomplish that."
She gasped. "You ran over his bike with the jeep?"
"No, that was my goal, but nope."
"But I-"
"Georgia, how old was I when this happened?"
"Fifteen."
"And are fifteen year olds good drivers?"
She crossed her arms and let out a heavy sigh. Her mom wasn't even being subtle with the digs. "We're probably not the best."
"Right and I was upset on top of it. I wasn't thinking straight and just going off of my emotions. I aimed for the bike, but I got mixed up with the gears and then there was a raccoon that startled me. I swerved and in the end I took out the mail box."
"Colin's family's mailbox?"
"No, a big blue mailbox sitting on the corner- it went flying into the middle of the street. It was right in front of Colin's house though, at least that's where it was before I hit it. The entire base was up within seconds it seemed."
"Wow, you stole an army jeep and hit a mailbox? Do you have a juvie record for damaging that much government property?"
She chuckled quietly. "No, no, Keisha and I got lucky. Since we were considered typically good kids, it was decided that no charges would be filed. Granted, we jumped out of the jeep and they could never prove who was driving, so…"
"Wow," Georgia said with a laugh, "mom's got a dark side."
"I'm not proud of it, Georgia, but it's a part of my past. That whole mess helped to shape the person I am today. I do hope you'll learn from my mistakes and the mistake you made tonight and not let a guy get to you so much that it overrides your common sense. I'm here. I'm always going to be here. Talk to me first."
"I'll try to remember, mom, I promise. So, how much-"
There was one thing Angela wanted to know, but wasn't sure how her daughter would handle being questioned. Would she be open or would she retreat? "Can I ask you something?"
"I guess."
"Part of the reason I was so hurt by what Colin did was because we'd been intimate. I thought sex was something that was supposed to bring us closer. To him it seemed like another thing to check off a list."
"What are you getting at?"
"How close…have you…did you and Trevor have sex?"
"Mom!" She covered her head with a blanket and wanted to crawl into a hole.
"I don't think it's an unreasonable question. And there's no need to be embarrassed. It's not as if we've never discussed sex before."
"Right and I promised I would talk to you before I did anything. Have I come to talk to you or asked you to take me for birth control?"
"No."
"Then you have your answer," Georgia replied, somewhat defensive.
"You don't need to have an attitude. I just wanted to know." She removed the blanket from her daughter's head and pushed the wayward curls out of her face. The blue eyes that stared back at her didn't appear relieved, however. They were still hiding something. "What aren't you telling me, Georgia?"
She sat up and faced her mother. "Promise not to get mad?"
"I'm not going to get madder than I already am tonight."
That was as good as she could hope for at this point. "I didn't have sex, not with Trevor or with anybody else, but we did talk about it."
"Oh?" Angela was glad she was sitting. "And?"
"He really wanted to and I thought about it…I really thought about it, but I decided I wasn't ready yet. I mean, we'd only been going out for a month. That's not that long when you think about it."
She was tempted to cheer and do cartwheels around the room. Instead she worked to choose her words carefully. "I'm glad you made the choice that was right for you, not Trevor."
"Let me guess, next you're going to tell me you want me to wait until I'm married, right?"
"I'd be a hypocrite if I said that. You were at mine and dad's wedding. The pictures are proof." Angela wrapped an arm around Georgia's shoulders. "I only hope when you do decide the time is right that it's with someone you trust and love. And that this person loves you the way you deserve."
She was quiet for several long moments as her mom's words sank in. "For a while tonight I was wondering if I did make the right choice."
"What do you mean?"
"I think that's what made him go to Kendra. Let's just say that "no" isn't a word she's familiar with."
"Is that true or are you just saying that about her because you're angry?"
"It's what I've heard. She's pretty popular with guys."
"I'm sorry Trevor cheated on you regardless of the circumstances, but I don't want you spreading rumors about Kendra's reputation, no matter what you've heard."
"But, mom-"
"No, Georgia. Dad and I didn't raise you to be the kind of girl who spreads rumors about other girls like that. Be mad at Trevor. If it hadn't of been Kendra it probably would've been someone else."
"Thanks a lot."
"All I'm saying is no person can make someone cheat. That's a choice they make by themselves. Don't blame the person they chose to cheat with."
Georgia laid her head against her mother's shoulder. "Could you stop making sense?"
"Sorry, dad called dibs on the angry card tonight and I got stuck being calm and rational. Next time we'll switch it up for you though."
"You always do. Can we go back to your story?"
"My story?
"Did you get into big trouble after you stole the jeep and crashed into the mailbox?"
"Ooh boy." She exhaled. "Your grandfather…to say he wasn't happy would be an understatement of epic proportions. He yelled until he lost his voice."
"Then what did Grandpa Sir do?"
Angela smiled at the nickname. One day when Georgia was around two or three years old she randomly starting referring to her grandfather as Grandpa Sir. Neither she nor Eric knew where she picked it up and her dad had been gone for more than a year when it started. Around the same time Georgia talked about her grandfather visiting in her dreams and would describe- in great detail- all of the adventures they had. The dreams stopped when she was about seven and the notebook where Angela kept a written record of them was a priceless memento. You could've knocked her over with a feather when Rosie woke up one day last year talking about a dream she had with a funny, giant man who looked like Grandpa Sir's pictures. There was a new notebook started and some of the details were so similar to Georgia's it was spooky. If Lucia and Sidda had dreams they either never mentioned them or didn't remember.
"Mom?" She nudged her arm when she received no response. "Mom?"
"What? Sorry, I guess my mind wandered for a minute."
"You were going to tell me how Grandpa Sir reacted to you taking the car."
"Right." She cleared her throat. "He decided that my insubordination was a direct result of lack of supervision on his part. That's more or less a direct quote from him."
"Insub..what?"
"Insubordination: my bad behavior."
"You know, sometimes smaller words are your friends."
"Grandpa didn't think so. Just like he also didn't think living with him was the right place for me anymore. The military kept him too busy and I needed more guidance. He decided I needed to go live with someone who could keep a better eye on me. That's how I first ended up here in Philadelphia. I picked my grandmother over military school and Aunt Trish." Angela decided to leave out the part about choosing Philadelphia solely because she thought she'd get to see her own mother again.
"Oh." The teen got up and walked over to the window. She picked up an old doll along the way and hugged it to her chest.
"Wow, I haven't seen you take out Baby Erica in a while. You dragged her along everywhere when you were little. I remember how upset you were when dad and I tried to explain why she couldn't go to kindergarten with you. Do you remember?" She was met with silence. "What is it?"
"You just spent the past forever saying you knew how I felt and the stupid thing you did when you were my age. Now you're telling me how grandpa punished you. Isn't the part that comes next you trying to explain why you're punishing me the same way and how you'll totally get what I'm feeling as you shove me out the door?"
"Oh, Georgia." Angela rushed over to her daughter and wrapped her arms around her. "We would never kick you out. It wouldn't ever occur to us as an option."
"Are you sure dad feels the same way," she mumbled, wiping her eyes on the hat that covered Baby Erica's head.
"Of course I'm sure. How could you doubt it?"
"He seems to hate me right now. He's hardly said a word. Dad always has something to say….about everything. Most of the time we can't get him to stop talking."
"Sweetie, no, he doesn't hate you. He's furious, yes, but he could never hate you. Your dad…" She sighed. "…when he's really angry or scared he shuts down. I think it's because he's afraid of saying something in the heat of the moment that he can't take back, so he'd rather say nothing."
"I'd rather know what he was thinking instead of having to guess."
"I've been telling him that for nearly seventeen years. I don't think he's changing." She kissed the top of Georgia's head. "But would we really want him any different?"
"I guess not. Dad would be weird if he wasn't, well…if he wasn't dad."
"I'm glad we agree. So are we clear now? Me and dad, while mad as hell and definitely don't want you pulling another stunt like this again, love you and have no intentions of turning our backs on you under any circumstances. Do you get it?"
She nodded. "Yeah."
"Good. But you need to accept that this isn't going to be a quick fix like the time you broke our bedroom window playing baseball or when you raided my closet without permission. Speaking of which, don't think for one second I didn't notice that the dress you were wearing came from my closet. And last I checked you can't afford Louboutin heels on your allowance. If they are scuffed, so help me, there will be extra hell to pay."
The teen went to retrieve the red patent peep toe slingbacks. "I don't see how you can walk in these things. I swear I could hardly keep my balance sitting in them."
"Louboutin is not a beginner's shoe. You have to learn to walk in them and they are definitely not for driving." Angela stared at the floor. "Now pick up my dress before it gets any more wrinkles."
"I only borrowed this dress because I haven't seen you wear it in forever. You said it might be too short for someone your age to—"
"Ooh, danger, Georgia, danger." She pointed at her daughter. "You're in enough trouble without calling your mother old. What I said about that dress was that it was much shorter in person than it looked online and inappropriate to wear for your grandmother's birthday party. That doesn't translate to you can take it from my closet at will."
"All of my stuff makes me look fifteen."
"You are fifteen."
"For ten more days."
"The dress code isn't magically changing on your birthday."
Georgia briefly wondered if she was still having her birthday this year. It was a big one, her sweet sixteen. But she wasn't going to ask. If her parents were fishing for ideas for her punishment, she wasn't going to provide one on a silver platter. "I took that one because the rest of your dresses either had no back or really crazy cutouts and designs in the back. Why is that?"
"Because it drives your father insane and he can't keep his hands off of me," Angela replied with a grin. "I love that."
"Gross, mom!" She flopped down on Lucia's bed and covered her face with a pillow. "Don't talk about you and daddy like that."
"How do you think you and your sisters got here? I certainly didn't wake up one morning and magically find you sleeping in a bassinet beside my bed."
"The stork picked us up from a cabbage patch."
"At least you have a logical explanation all worked out for yourself."
